Did I Go Too Far?

[Mosha]

The title should say Did I go too far? But I don't know how to edit it.

We have a Burmese couple working for us. I'm no medical expert, but there other home in a neighbouring Mu Ban burnt down and I think the adult woman has had a nervous breakdown over it. You have to accept that the Burmese are even more supersticious than your average Thai. The husband thinks she is possesed. The woman's eldest daughter died and her son in laws new wife does not want to care for the son from the previous relationship. So he was left with his grandmum. The lady with the problem. For a week now he has been beaten, usually for no reason at all, and by beaten he has lumps everywhere. Well 30 minutes ago I snapped, (We have no common language her Thai is worse than mine) I marched the 100 yards to their house, after hearing the kid screaming, snatched the stick from her hand and yelled F*****g pack it in you are doing my head in. I broke the said stick in front of her face and took the lad back here. I have witnesses, a Thai and the lads very young Aunt. When I got back to the house I was shaking. Sorry if I'm rambling, but after that I had a couple of beers.

Edited January 30, 2008 by Mosha

[Cobalt60]

dont know about the long term, but I would have done exatly the same as you if that helps.

[siamesekitty]

Hopefully it snapped some sense into the lady. If not be careful of her getting back at the boy when you're not around.

Very sad, as abuse is no matter where in the world it is happening.

[HDRIDER]

HI

Good on you.

[Lilawadee]

dont know about the long term, but I would have done exatly the same as you if that helps.

Me too.

Long term you'll have to work it out though, the kid is still her responsibility. Find someone with enough language skills and spine to volunteer for a serious talking session. Not in front of the boy, though.

How old is the kid anyways?

[TheDon]

Thats not too bad, after a few beers I would of burnt the place down

[soundman]

A++++ for sticking to your principals & not giving into the "its a Thai problem, leave it to the Thai's to deal with" brigade.

AFAIAC you did a good thing. Now here comes the hard part. What are you going to do next?

Soundman.

Edit - speling.

Edited January 30, 2008 by soundman

[Mosha]

The wife too has had enough, and says she has to go.

[Patsycat]

You did the right thing - anyone who would sit around and hear a child being hurt and do nothing is less than pond scum.

Good luck in sorting out this very sad and distressing situation.

[Lilawadee]

Some more advice.. I was already out the door but thought about this situation a bit more and rushed back to the keyboard..

She's Burmese of course, though every dealing with Burmese I had leads me to believe they're just as nuts as Thais, and I mean that in the most possitive sense imaginable. Seriously, I would do the following in this follow-up talk with someone who can translate:

* The person who translates should not be of lower status that the woman you're talking to. Better still if it's a person she doesn't know. It'd add to the awkwardness otherwise.

* Don't talk with the boy present.

* Don't challenge her authority as caretaker of the kid. My main angle would be that *YOU* are embarrassed (lose face) because of the scenes she keeps making. "What will the neighbours think?" "What if they call the police?" "I am responsible for what goes on on my land." "This situation cannot continue / I need to take responsibility to keep the peace. " And SHE needs to take responsibility for the kid. Does she need help in taking care of the kid, and in what way. Does she feel that a 2 week stint in a temple would be beneficial for her mental peace, and if so, you can arrange someone to take care of the kid during that time.

* Then finish with some carrot & stick type messages you feel are appropriate.

[Mosha]

As it stands now. We have is Auntie staying in our house, she is the woman's daughter about 12 year old. She is my wife's helper around the house. I asked Sopa to ask her what happened, and she confirms my telling of events. There is another Aunt but the police are around there every day checking the Burmese permits. It's only acrss the water from Burma/Myanmar. The Burmese man would take the lad off to work but he is at an age where kids get bored easily. Tonight he is sleeping in our home with his Auntie.

As for neighbours, they are either the wife's family or very good friends. It's unlikely they would hear. Apart from family the nearest people are about 500 yards away.

[bruceboy]

Congrats, would have done the same.

[jaiyenyen]

Well done that man.

[mrbojangles]

Well i couldn't have just stood around and done nothing. You did right IMO Mosha.

[yorkman]

You definately have not gone too far Mosha. No matter what and where, if you know a kid is been thrashed as you describe you did the right thing. Burmese, Thai or Martians, you did the only decent thing possible.

The advice from Lilawadee above looks very sound, good thinking L

[Mosha]

As things stand. I have stopped the stick. I have to accept this as a win. The slaps are are now on his legs and backside. To be honest this is what I would do, given how the pc brigade is letting things slip in the west.