Egon

There are plenty of Thai-Farang success stories, such as these

There is a video-clip and some comments about the episode here

My wife sends about £150 a month to her mum in Thailand. She has earnt this money herself and chooses to send it to her mum rather than buy clothes for herself etc. Her mother really needs the money so if my wife did not send any money I think we would both be a pair of selfish devils.

What bothers me is the kind of friends my wife has acquired in the UK. They regularly like to "put her down" over the fact that she does not send home more money. One of them has also said that her mother was not happy with the £300 she sent her out of her wages. She also wanted £200 extra out of the Farangs wages - as he had promised when marrying her daughter. The mother called her son-in-law and asked him to keep his promise - so now she receives £500 from the UK every month. Most of this money goes towards the brother who has gambling debts and drinking problems - ie. straight down the drain. Such is life

There is another article on this subject here

Surely, Stickman has now seen sense and has opted to keep his teaching job in return for agreeing to remove all "objectionable" content from his site. I cannot blame the guy. Why give up a good day job that is at the upper end of the English language teacher scale in favour of publishing a site that has probably peaked in terms of popularity and original content?

Galt was right in saying that Stickman was just repeating himself in his many articles and readers' submissions. How many years could he really keep publishing that stuff and increase his readership?? I respect Stickman's common sense in opting for his day job which also fits in with his new lifestyle with a middle-class Thai wife and increasingly wanting to mingle with middle-class Thais. a memorable article by him was on how he had come to avoid the company of "lower class" Thais. If he had chosen to keep publishing his site and rely on that income instead of his teaching income then he would be stuck with a certain "lower class" community and reporting the goings on in this part of society. It does not seem to be what he wants to do with his life at present so in a way maybe Galt has just hastened a process already under way where Stickman has become "respectable".

Stickman has probably kept his site going so as not to admit defeat - but fact is that all the major content (Stickman's weeklies and readers' submissions) are gone and probably won't come back.

Anyone searching google for information on Thailand or Bangkok will not come across either of the two sites by accident (try it, try to find either one without using their names)

Thad,

The gripe I have with Stickman is that if you put a search in Google for "Thai relationships" or relationship matters between Thais and Farangs he does come up. Most of his readers' submissions deal with this aspect (over and over again ) I read his site a year ago as i had initiated a relationship with a Thai woman. Back then we were separated as I lived in the Uk and she in Thailand, but now we're together and I couldn't have found a better partner. All the (biased) advice on Stickman does not apply to our relationship nor to many others I believe. Yet his site is still probably read and (even sadder) believed by a good number of people. What is sure is that Galt's site does nothing to balance out this aspect of the Stickman enterprise . . .

If he wasn't called notstickman would anyone take any interest? Are you smoking both of their beef by even posting the topic? Don't you have a life? It's just opinion, if you lived your life by what these guys say wouldn't you be missing out on finding out for yourself, a lot of recommendations these guys make regarding the social scene make are crap, turn off the computer and get out there and make your own opinion.

Respect!

I think most people who voted "couldn't give a Cahoonas" are people who know of Stickman (and maybe Galt) but do not approve of either. The people who keep this thread going are obviously supporters of one or the other whereas the majority probably do not bother to post on this thread - just because the thread is 7 pages long does not mean that people are that interested - just some. I am interested because I have a very negative view of Stickman and have had so for one year. I have read John Galt's site but found that it is just slander combined with even more Stickmanesque garbage ie. even worse than Stickman.

Saying that I probably shouldn't even contribute to this thread as all it does it give publicity to Messrs. Stickman . . .

I predict that "NotStickman", John Galt, will gloat and brag about his record number of visits in his next weekly column solely due to this discussion.

I know that my own site shot up by about 300 views a day after I had spoken about it on this site. This discussion is now 6 pages long so I bet John Galt will have upped his weekly views by quite a leap!

<snip>

Other sites least have a better standard of English than the weirdo writings of John Galt. His hapless writing should have deflated his self-hyped ego ages ago. That people read and even praise him I find . . .

Mod Note - please do not discuss moderation on the forum. If you think a topic/post breaks the rules then use the "report" function or contact a moderator with any other queries.

Well, the programme of Russian "internet/mail order marriages" that might have been meant to include Thais as well was not actually that negatively slanted. It just presented reality for these couples I think. People could make up their own minds - the bouncer marrying a young Siberian girl was portrayed in a good light and their relationship seemed quite healthy and "normal". If the Tv programme wanted to be negative they could have been as the bouncer was clearly in his 40s and looked like a sort of serial womanizer, who was skint on top of that. The 20 year old virtually paid for all her travels and wedding expenses herself despite earning a pittance. She also seemed very naive and taken in by the "bouncer"'s charm, so maybe she was being taken advantage of? But the programme did not portray it like this.

The other two guys did not have such happy endings - but what could you expect. The Lancashire guy funding a Russian girl's education looked like Danny de Vito on crack and the American guy wanting to pick up a Russian bride is probably not going to get much luck if he keeps buying all his first dates mobile phones worth £100.

You can slant the programme for their choice of chararcters to portray but not really how they portrayed them. I also suspect that it might have been difficult to hoodwink more "normal" couples into participating as such folks normally realise that they will be portrayed alongside various freaks and misfits - a prospect most people with any sense will want to avoid.

just accept that soppy sentimentalism is not everyone's cup of tea

I apologise for having offended you by making a link to such "soppy sentimentalism" - Have a nice life!

OK he wasn't an natiive English speaker, but where on earth did he learn his English?

Somewhere down South Pattaya by the sounds of it.

Hmmm, what a funny and yet predictable comment.

I thought the clip was quite moving and would raise good memories in some people. That is why I posted it. I did not think it was something that would provoke any negative comments at all.

Just figures that someone would make a needless comment debasing the real emotions shown in that clip . . .

The worst enemies of Thai-Farang couples really are the folks who have been burnt by Thai women and thus will never believe that some people can be truly happy in such a relationship.

But anyways . . . que sera, sera!

This is a video for those of you who have experienced getting a Visa for your Thai partner and seeing her arrive in your country for the first time. May bring back some fond memories - did for me.

Don't import her back home unless she is well educated, culturally versitile, speaks good English & is close to your age.

That is bull-crap. I married a fantastic woman with little education. Now she is realising her potential in the UK being of a keen natural intelligence. A lot of Thais never get the opportunity to become "well educated" or "culturally versatile" mainly due to responsibilities towards the family. There is no reason to limit yourself to privileged middle-class Thai girls - there are many wonderful gals of all classes in Thailand as long as you get a bit pro-active in finding them.

An interesting aspect of whether it is better to marry middle class Thai girls or "working class" girls is how well they integrate into the Thai community in your home country.

I have seen evidence of conflict when middle-class Thais find that they're living in an expat community of mainly workingclass Isaan women.

Everyone knows that Thailand is a very hierarchical society which is very evident in Thai behaviours and ways of thinking. I once met a middle-class girl who got extremely brutal when I told her I had married a "working class" girl - her language resembled that of a Roman senator speaking about his slaves - saying that in everyday Thailand girls like that would be squashed under her feet etc.

If well-educated Thai women move to countries like the UK they may soon find that it may take some time before they find the professional job they are looking for. Maybe they will have to take on low-skilled jobs for a certain period. These low-skilled jobs now mainly go to Eastern Europeans so sometimes the easiest job for a Thai woman to take on is working in a Thai restaurant. Many of these Thai restaurants are owned by Isaan ladies - how does a well-off Bangkok gal respond to taking orders from an Isaan woman I wonder?

In any case, all Thais relocating to the West will want to find friends - it may prove harder for a middle class woman to do so and this could complicate a relationship.

Just a point to counterbalance the view that finding a well-educated woman as a wife is always the best option.

Best to stay away from marriage brokers, matchmakers & other various "go-betweens" if possible.

My choice is, if you are interesting in living in Thailand, move there and spend some time developing friends and local contacts and meet women who are not entangled with these various agencies and intermediaries.

I agree. It is better to spend £1500 on 3 trips to Thailand spread over 1 year instead of donating it to Lawrence Lynch. During those 3 trips you are bound to meet the same sort of gals who are on Mr lynch's books ie. traders, cashiers etc. It does not take much to converse with them and if anyone needs a bit of guts to begin such courting I am sure it will develop the more visits you make to Thailand. Sometimes you may not even get further than the hotel as it seems like female hotel staff are keenly on the look out for farang prospects.

Mr Lynch can scoop up some easy money because so many Thai women seek Western men. It does not take a lot for him to fill his books with attractive women as it will not take a lot for any Westerner to meet these same women in everyday situations. The only service he seems to offer that may make it easier for a Western male is apparently his vetting service - but how credible is that?? I doubt very much that he spends a lot of time investigating a girl's background other than what she tells him. Also where is a girl with perhaps several unsuccessful Farang relationships likely to turn for a last chance - most likely a place like Lawrence Lynch's. A lot of Thai girls hope for a lucky break in meeting a Farang but few will register with the likes of Lawrence Lynch - unless they're really desperate to establish or re-establish such a relationship.

Don't import her back home unless she is well educated, culturally versitile, speaks good English & is close to your age.

That is bull-crap. I married a fantastic woman with little education. Now she is realising her potential in the UK being of a keen natural intelligence. A lot of Thais never get the opportunity to become "well educated" or "culturally versatile" mainly due to responsibilities towards the family. There is no reason to limit yourself to privileged middle-class Thai girls - there are many wonderful gals of all classes in Thailand as long as you get a bit pro-active in finding them.

I recently had a suit made in Bangkok. Following the advice given on this thread i tried to seek out Raja's. I did an internet search which came up with a site about Raja's near Sukhumvit road.

I had a suit made with 2 pants for 15,000 THB.

I am quite pleased with the suit but now realise that the Raja's I went to was the wrong one. The Raja's I went to is on the corner of Soi 11. So beware - more than one Raja's.

I pay you money for something you have and you give me what you have that I paid for. You can tell me it is to prove my worth or solidify family relationships or just about anything else, it remains a sale.

I am sorry, but that sounds like an archetypical capitalist way of thinking. You may be surprised that not all cultures think on the basis of Adam Smith's work, the Wealth of Nations. Some cultures are actually traditional. I am sure you are very knowledgeable, Kerry, so surely you must realise that you are looking at Sin Sot through a pair of very thick (American?) glasses.

You are giving your subjective view of Thai culture. You don't like it because you see Sin Sot as some money deal whereas Thais see it differently.

As the father of four daughters I don’t see anything wrong with sin sot. I would be more than happy to accept it. I paid a tremendous amount of money for proper schools and braces and clothes and other contrivances to make my little babies attractive to the opposite sex.

Heck I think sin sot is a great idea.

I don’t have any problem paying sin sot.

I think sin sot should be made the law of the planet.

But after all of that I think it is selling a woman.

Lets call a spade a spade.

As a father do I think it would be nice to be compensated for all of the money I have spent? Yes. Heck yes.

But I am not wearing any rose colored glasses. I realize it is selling my daughter.

If a bidding war ensues the highest bidder may not get the prize because that would be up to my daughter.

But it is still a sale nevertheless.

I disagree. Please read this

I pay you money for something you have and you give me what you have that I paid for. You can tell me it is to prove my worth or solidify family relationships or just about anything else, it remains a sale.

I am sorry, but that sounds like an archetypical capitalist way of thinking. You may be surprised that not all cultures think on the basis of Adam Smith's work, the Wealth of Nations. Some cultures are actually traditional. I am sure you are very knowledgeable, Kerry, so surely you must realise that you are looking at Sin Sot through a pair of very thick (American?) glasses.

You are giving your subjective view of Thai culture. You don't like it because you see Sin Sot as some money deal whereas Thais see it differently.

No the difference is you think most woman here are for sale, i do not.

So, what do you call sin sot?

Do a search on sinsod/dowry and you might find a couple of my posts on the subject. I used to try to explain certain aspects of the Thai culture to people here before getting tired of it.

I can understand where you are coming from. I too get tired of explaining Thai culture. It is a very complicated business. There is the real culture. There is the culture Thais would have you believe is the culture. There is the culture as perceived by Farang women. And the culture as perceived by Farang men. And the culture perceived by old Thais and the culture perceived by young Thais and the culture perceived by big city Thais and the culture perceived by small town Thais.

It is a hard thing knowing what the real Thai culture is. There are some rare moments when all of the different points are brought together. Sadly, those moments are rarely allowed to continue.

If people would contribute to this non-commercial project that aims to provide a comprehensive and ever-expanding guide for the Farang to Thai culture then maybe it would not be necessary to keep repeating the same things over and over again. It could be a standard and balanced guide thaifarang.co.uk

I think your situation is far from being to what the majority of the board are experiencing. You say Thailand doesn't have any more advantages to you than back home and that you'd like to move back home if the situation changed. Am I not accurate in stating that most of the people on this board who are living in Thailand like it there and see living there as being some sort of an advantage to them? And are the tourists or visitors to Thailand only coming because of Thailand's great beaches and scenery, or are they coming because of those reasons and because it's cheap? A few people on this board may be married to a Thai person and stuck in Thailand against their preference due to the inability to get their spouse a visa, but I think most people with a Thai spouse either like living in Thailand or they get a visa for their spouse to join them back in their home country.

Very few farangs are forced to live in Thailand. Most of them are there because they want to be there because it gives them some advantage. If not, they would leave and go home or to another country that did give them an advantage. Low prices are certainly not the only draw that brings people to Thailand, but it's the combination of low prices and whatever they are seeking that brings them in droves.

Sorry if i am going off topic again, but I think BKK traveller should not be totally scorned because he is just telling the reality of the situation. A lot of Westerners choose to live in Thailand because it is comapratively more comfortable here than in their home countries, ie. the people are friendlier to them and they enjoy a better standard of living. It all boils down to money. From the point of view of a selfish Westerner Thailand is an ideal opportunity to be exploited. He is laso right that the attitudes of Thais perhaps from a rural background can be refreshing compared with our thoroughly modernized western society where personal relationships are always being marginalised in favour of materialistic greed.

It is, however, an extremely unsympathetic view. It is like empathising with a past White planatation owner of the American South who wishes that Africa will never develop as this might hinder him in getting enough slaves. To wish economic poverty on any nation so you can take advantage is ultimate selfishness and from this point of view it is satisfying to know that Thailand will eventually shed its remnants of an agrarian past and emerge as a modernized, westernised country no longer susceptible to western exploitation. But it is overly idealistic to believe that Westerners visisting and living in Thailand are not coming to take advantage of their comparative economic wealth to secure a good life for themselves. That is just human nature.

Totally agree with Jockstar!

It seems as if trolls have hit the forum, otherwise a certain section of the forum seem intent on turning Thaivisa into another sex tourist board of which there are already numerous. Is it really the case that all Thai related forums have to dedicate themselves specifically to bar girls discussions? Does this mean that people who discuss Thailand on the internet are mainly interested in this aspect and other folks just don't frequent Thai related boards at all? I can understand why many people are deterred from contributing if a large percentage of discussions/members solely focus on Thailand's nightlife scene.

Are we talking about the same article? The article I read in the Telegraph was rather generous spirited and showed compasion for the girl.There was no suggestion all Thai girls are hookers and why on earth do you think "average Telegraph readers" -as opposed to readers of the Mirror, Sun etc- have an opinion one way or the other.You talk about stereotypical and lazy writing.Pot and kettle mate, pot and kettle.

Generous spirited??? You must be joking. Or then again it probably is generous to a Telegraph reader considering that their views of looking after the poor is to reinstitute the workhouse etc.

This black article serves no other purpose than to denigrate poor Asian women desperate to find a way out of poverty while sanctifying the promiscuity of a privileged Telegraph reader - he almost got "scammed" - oh, poor him!

It starts with a old news and continues to something even more familiar(?)

Read Past the First Few Paragraphs.

###### good story I thought.

Personally I thought it was fairly stereotypical, lazy writing. It just re-inforces the view amongst the average Telegraph reader, that all Thai girls are hookers looking to ensnare some poor, innocent farang guy using their evil hyponitc sexuality. He, of course, was naive and completely in love, before getting his heart broken.

It could equally have been written as I went to Thailand and had unprotected sex with a prostitute and made her feel as though she had a future and a way out of this life. I went home and forgot about her until she called me to say she was pregnant. I immediately assumed she was a lying, scheming whore and made the baby take a DNA test. Luckily I was in the clear. I went out to celebrate by getting very drunk and having more unprotected sex.

The truth is, of course, probably somewhere in between the 2 stories. Hope he had a full health check up afterwards.

Bravo! You are a voice of reason, my good man!!

There are some seriously sick people on this forum.

It does the TV mods no credit that they haven't called a halt to some of the moronic postings made here.

A much loved guy from HH died. Its a tragedy for him, his family and importantly, for his son, now in the UK.

His death becomes a rant for the usual suspects spouting their sad views. Inappropriate and badly timed.

The credibilty of this forum , despite the good stuff, sinks lower and lower.

The main HH forum tells a different story.

Hear, hear!

does anyone think the same, been in thailand a few years now have a lovely wife and two daughters. I love thailand and the culture, and like me im sure theres many expats that have really embraced the thai way of life. and why not will are all just guest,s in there country. I have a good few thai friend,s , never ask for money and allways buys the beers and vice versa. We go out to a few bars in the evening have a few drinks and play pool, one paticular night out i came across the &lt;deleted&gt; of the year. pissed as &lt;deleted&gt; and saying how this country has no idea of making money, they cant build houses and there woman only like farang. So i found this an interesting point and one i had to address. I approached the &lt;deleted&gt;, and ask if he was on holiday? oh no he replied been here 9 years got the thai homemaker and the brat to go with it. I said your a lucky man to have such an understanding wife. &lt;deleted&gt; that he replied il wont be banging her tonight. with that i walked away. Now this &lt;deleted&gt; was the most nerdy looking geek you would ever see, so my question is. He,s come to thailand because no woman would give him the time of day in his country, but out here he think,s hes something else roll playing if you like, the big i am ive got this ive got that look how much money ive got compared to all the peasants out here. well its no surprise if you think about it why there are so many stories about how a farang got taken for everything by he's thai wife , and never trust a thai person. Well &lt;deleted&gt; him and all the other &lt;deleted&gt; out here that act the same, and go back to where they came from, So we all dont get tared with the same brush.

What a great post! You should re-write it slightly and then send it off to Stickman and see if he accepts it or not. Bet he won't as he'll offend too many readers.