stopdarot

OP. Ignore most of what you have heard here. Sounds to me like you know what you are getting into and are wiling to invest the time and money needed to make a relationship with a woman from a developing country, with all that entails, work.

I would not give the family any money upfront as gift. If as you say she went to a private Catholic school, chances are her family is middle class (something most here don’t ever know exists in Thailand) and might be insulted. Not every family is poor, there are actually many that do quite well.

Good luck,

TH

I'm not sure how the class system works in Thailand, or even if there are class values.

They have got some money, Dad drives a Benz(or Merc as I would say) and they bought Nok a little Honda last year, but money does not always denote class!

She is an only child so that may come into the equation too.

As for the footie.. COYS

I suppose it depends on whether you are going carry it your luggage or conceal it about your person...

hate to bring these two words into any topic of conversation, but the issue of "sin sod" should be an interesting one.

Very funny... I've read a few posts on this!

I'll cross that bridge another time...

What do you think would be a good gift for the folks? Something I can easily carry on the plane, something that might be special to them from the UK?

And which parent is the one to impress, mum or dad?

both parent need to be impressed but i would say in different ways, always a good idea to get off on a good footing with the old man.

as for gifts what part of the u.k. are you from, is there anything from your home town that specialises in making something.

find out from your gf if her father likes any particular football team back in the u.k. maybe a signed shirt that he can bragg to his friends about. does he drink whiskey?

word of warning when and if you do finally meet the parents, and give them gifts. dont expect an overeaction to your generousity, or a big hug and a kiss. its not the thai way. if you get my jhist.

London... So plenty of shops. Only it needs to be today, going to the footie tomorrow..

So I'm guessing a cheap bag from Harrods and a single malt...

hate to bring these two words into any topic of conversation, but the issue of "sin sod" should be an interesting one.

Very funny... I've read a few posts on this!

I'll cross that bridge another time...

What do you think would be a good gift for the folks? Something I can easily carry on the plane, something that might be special to them from the UK?

And which parent is the one to impress, mum or dad?

Ok guys. I've had a think about your posts and I'm still going to knock on her parents door Tuesday, I have the address now, but I won't be on bended knee. I've been told that I need to ask dad for her hand before I can ask her.

So I'll just come over and spend time with her. I'm looking forward to the water festival that I've heard so much about. We are going to drive down to Samed, I've never been there.

Nok is not aware of my financial situation, I wanted her to like me not the prospect of me having money, and I'm going to keep it that way.

I was MD of the firm for over 8 years, and I have the right qualifications to get a work permit.

Thanks people. I know many of you have horror stories but I don't intend to be one.

So, nearly every guy on here knows somebody who is or has been cheated on in Thailand, right?

And when you were back in the west, did you know any similar situations back there with western girls?

What would make Thai girls so much worse? Or could it be the guys you know and the quality of the girls they get into relationships with?

You roll the dice and you take a chance.... But if the odds are bad, don't do it. My odds are good and I'm onto a winner...

Why are you giving her 500quid a month? Also why would you give her parents 5K just because you meet them? (small gift for each is appropriate - dosh is simply low class)

£500 is not a lot to me. So why not?

The 5k I really don't understand, but we can talk about that on Tuesday.

Off to make a call to the Land of Smiles. cheers

500 pounds not a lot to you? And you are a bricklayer with unsteady work? So how much did you or would you make as a bricklayer each month? You must have plenty of savings stashed away. The request for 5,000 bht for here parents at first meeting is a new one on me and I thought I had seen everything here.

If you had read my earlier posts you would have seen that I have sold the family business. My dad worked hard to build that up and put me through school and 6 years after he'd gone I could see the work slowly fading. A large corp' offered to buy me out.

She was well educated at a Catholic girls school in Bangkok.

As I mentioned before she does not drink or smoke and she does not have tattoos.

It was my suggestion that she stopped working as a receptionist in that hotel on Soi 4.

I made the offer of money.

We have known each other for 8 months, but have only spent 8 weeks together 24/7.

We talk everyday on the phone and the tinternet.

I am financially secure after selling the family business.

I am not going to Thailand to drink my life away on a barstool and dream of what might have been.

I am not so old and ugly that I need to buy the affections of young girls.

Cheers for all the comments and i hope to meet some of you at a Thaivisa do someday.

Cheers guys.. But can I add that I've not fallen for any old tricks.. I wanted to give this girl money, for what ever reason it feels like the right thing to do and she has never asked for it nor suggested how much I should give. I know she has saved some of the money I have given her, she has also bought clothes a computer and no doubt given her parents some too. And this pleases me.

I am a young fit guy, if you think that this girl is with me only for my money then you are wrong. I know this girl, you don't. She is an honest and sweet girl.

I will keep my property in the UK, and I will keep my head screwed on. I'm not going to just drag the girl away from her culture, family and friends. I'm going to do what I think is right and go to her.

I will continue to give her money as I would if I had a western gf in a <deleted> job. She will be my partner, my lover, my equal as she would be where ever she was from.

She does not drink or smoke, and she hasn't got a clutch of children living with Grandparents up north.

Life is good..

Nobody mentioned the "T" word yet?

?

^Well some of us do have gf's that have their own job and therefore their own dosh. Would you do the same for a western bird?

She had a job, and the pay was crap. To be honest I didn't like the idea of her working on that road. I didn't want her being ruined as many of the girls mentioned on this site are.

I see nothing wrong with investing in something you desire. It happens all over the world in many walks of life.

Does the footballer let his gf continue to work in John Lewis, or the Director let her work in an office?

No, we invest in our relationships, we attempt to make them our equals. How many of you guys on here have gf/wives working for a low salary? None I'd guess, but if you do you need to look at why..

Do you normally pay your girlfriends a salary for dating you? I think this is where things will go pear shape mate. However at the end of the day it's your dosh, but keep in mind paying someone doesn't buy loyalty if that is your thinking.

I paid her a salary because I like her. Wouldn't you give your girlfriend some money to live on?

Hey... Just talked to my girl. I really miss her.

Thanks for all the tips guys. I am going to be careful, take my time and just chill. We want to do a bit of travelling before I start work. And just enjoy each others company.

My mate has told me he can get me a job over there, I guess it's all about who you know sometimes.

I am going to give it a while then I will buy a house or flat there, and before you start I know I have to start/buy a company and put the property in that name.

I appreciate the advice, both good and bad. Cheers

Why are you giving her 500quid a month? Also why would you give her parents 5K just because you meet them? (small gift for each is appropriate - dosh is simply low class)

£500 is not a lot to me. So why not?

The 5k I really don't understand, but we can talk about that on Tuesday.

Off to make a call to the Land of Smiles. cheers

Cheers Ding, I'm not rushing anything.

Just because my girl worked on Soi 4 doesn't make her bad. Far from it, I never met such a quiet, sweet and coy girl in my life.

I am not stupid, builder or not, if I train as a teacher then I am a teacher. That's how it works.

I have sold my firm and I'm going to let out my house. All paid for.

So 45k is good enough for me. We can't all be high flyers working on ex-pat wages!!

And what do you mean 45k won't get a work permit? Of course it will.

Cheers Britadders, we have talked about living together but she says her parents would not let her.

I know what you are saying about asking a girl to marry after such a sort time but I have known her for more than 8 months, and if I met the right girl then I may do this in the UK too... But we are not talking about here are we, and it is different there.

As a teacher you will not earn much more.

Whilst I was there at Christmas I met a guy, who I am still in contact with, who earns 45k a month.

The Uk is slowly falling apart, jobs are scarce. There is nothing wrong with someone wanting to change their career at any age.

I guess I just wrote my original post to say Hi and introduce myself. I know that meeting people is not easy when you first move abroad and my friend told me about meetings you lot have.

How long have you actually stayed with her ( i mean was it just 2 weeks each time or what)

remember most of thai girls are kind and sweet when you first meet them but once they get their claws in they change - not all do so hope you found good one but asking her to marry you already??? are you mad???

p.s - I can live on koh samui for 500quid a month and party (including paying 100quid rent a month) so maybe you need think hard mate!!! - thats around 26,000 baht month now!!

Also a good one is call her around 10-11pm thai time, if she is on the game you will hear music, giggling etc... if she at home even in bkk will not be so noisy!!!

chok dee

Hi, I have spent a good 8 weeks 24/7 with her.

I can ask her to marry me now but I'm not going to marry for a while. She might not have me!!

I speak to her at 5.30 my time everyday, not far off that now, and it is always quiet. I have no reason to think she is 'on the game' as you put it. Why would I? Not all Thai girls are you know.

She did work in Nana hotel, but not the big one, in the little one at the other end, I don't think it has anything to do with big one.

26k a month doesn't seem a lot. I hope to earn a lot more then that!!

Hi guys, a mate has put me on to this site to help me 'learn' from the wise (his words).

I have been to Thailand 4 times now, on the second trip I met a girl (hears the groans) who worked in a hotel at the end of Soi 4 Sukkumfit.

Now, I have been back to Bangkok to see her twice, she is 10 years younger than me, I'm 33, she is not a tart (I hope) and to be honest I have really fallen for her.

I don't want to bring her back to the UK, after reading through some of the posts on here makes me think that would be a bad idea, but I am preparing to move over there. I have registered to do a CELTA and intend to work as a teacher. I am a bricklayer and there's not a lot of work around in the UK right now.

Nok has been very good with the little money I have sent her, she has never asked for more or even money for her parents' sick buffalo, but they live in Bangkok so I guess they haven't got one! But she has said that when I meet her parents, I haven't yet, I should give them a 'gift' of money. 5k Baht was mentioned. Only I'm not sure why, and I can't find any posts about this on here.

I'm not saying she is not telling the truth but it does seem strange. She has not worked in the hotel since November and has lived on only £500 I have sent her each month. But, because she lives with her parents, she has been leaving the house each day as if going to work so they don't think she is a kept/lazy woman.

Something doesn't feel right. I can't put my finger on it.... Anyway, I am due to surprise her on Monday with a visit when I intend to ask for her hand in marriage...

I am going to go to her old place of work to find out her parents' address and knock on her door. I can't wait.

Maybe I am just getting cold feet!!