teacher17

Wow.

I get the impression you are a farang woman married to a Thai man? Or your husband has family here in Thailand? Either way, you're in trouble.

To be perfectly honest, living with an infant in Bangkok is a nightmare for several reasons, safety for your child being the major problem.

Air pollution is not as bad as it was 15 years ago, but still a major issue for an infant with sensitive lungs. I wouldn't bring out an infant in open air the first 3-4 months, and when I did it would be on early sunday mornings.

Traffic (as you know) is mad and walking down a street with a buggy soon turns into an obstacle course lined with motorcyclists using the sidewalks as a shortcut.

A MASSIVE problem is crossing a street. Many drivers dont respect traffic lights, effectively putting you and the baby's life at risk every time you cross the street. Footbridges are almost impossible to cross for a mom with a baby in a buggy. Do you expect to carry the buggy in one hand and balance the baby in the other?

The alternative is to accept the risk associated with air pollution, dangerous traffic and lack of baby seats in taxis driven by people with limited training and no understanding of safety. Or you could do what the Thais do; give diddly and accept that you and your child can get mauled by a car when you drive home in your Honda Wave 125 "SUV" - transforming you and the baby into a roadside Big Mac.

My best advice to anyone who considers raising a child in Thailand without having the financial means to provide the safety required is to leave and raise the baby elsewhere. And that is my advice in this case.

Go home.

Yes, my husband is Thai.

Hah. Well, not going home....so that's not an option. Air pollution is not only in BKK...besides, we're not living in BKK the first couple months of the child's life and my question wasn't about air pollution...

I'm not buying a stroller/pram. I don't feel I need one because Thai sidewalks are well...sometimes non existent. I will be using a baby sling/carrier. What about all the families who live in BKK?? They live normal lives and let's face it--everytime we walk out the door there's a chance you could get hit by a car, etc (and this goes for not only in BKK).

That's wonderful that maybe you have the money to take your child around in a car and somehow magically avoid all the danger that everyone here faces everyday just because you have the "financial means to do so." Reality is not always like that...in any country for that matter.

Some people especially teachers don't earn much here, cars are expensive here most people can't afford them give her a break..

Taxis are the really the only option. You could buy a cheap old car if you can get the funds together, if you can sell it in the future it will lose very little value so won't cost much after selling. You can look for a second hand car seat on sites like www.olx.co.th.

You'll need a baby cradle seat at first which can be strapped in and un strapped quickly in a taxi.

Here's one with push chair for 1800B. http://www.olx.co.th/product-4934913/ in laksi Bangkok. Edit: just saw doesn't have car seat.

The car is insured here not the driver so anyone can drive it.

Thanks! Taxis in BKK I can take--no problem. Phuket is just full of tuk tuks and taxi motorbikes though...

I should say that we will be in phuket for only a few months during my maternity leave and then after go back to BKK.

So my husband could drive someone else's car then? Maybe police here don't care anyway...but there is a small chance we could use his family member's car if we have to. I will buy a car seat for sure...I've heard it's not good to buy second hand...any truth to that?

Right..so helpful....if you don't have any solid advice, then please don't bother commenting..thanks...

Has anyone experienced/or has your wife experienced giving birth at Mission Hospital specifically in Phuket? What was the cost? I know natural is cheaper...how much was an antenatal appointment?

I'm thinking about the possibility of giving birth there as it seems cheaper than some of the other hospitals in Phuket and I've heard some good reviews, but I'd still like more info. Since it's a christian hospital, do they allow the husband at the birth? Is there a specific doctor there that is open to natural birth? Thanks!

Hi,

I'm pregnant and worried about what I should do regarding transporting a newborn around.

First off, I am a teacher and my husband works in a restaurant. Are salaries are OK for living off of and saving a bit, but we have not been able to save up enough money to buy a car, especially with hospital costs, etc.

I am also of the opinion that you should use a car seat if you have a baby/child. However, I don't have that option because I don't have a car. I guess we could "rent" a car for a bit, but I think that would be expensive. We currently live in Bangkok, but I will probably give birth in Phuket as some of my husbands family lives there.

His cousin and uncle both have a car...and they could take us around, but not all the time...maybe my husband could drive it but I don't know if you're allowed to drive someone else's car or if his cousin/uncle would be OK with him using it or not.

I obviously do not want to use the motorbike (which we have...) but I don't know that I have many other options. I know I could invest in maybe a baby helmet, etc...

I know this could turn into a heated topic, but really all I want is advice. Trying to be responsible and it's a bit hard when you lack money and live in Thailand...Thanks!

Thanks for the info!

Yes, you'd think they wouldn't be so strict about it...but they are I guess...

Does anyone know if a Thai person can get their record cleared if it's been a certain amount of year since the crime? We've been in contact with someone from the police and their answer to that question was "maybe." My husband had to go to the judge to get a paper saying he had been let go and the circumstances of the arrest, etc. After he got that, he was told to go back to the bangkok police station...not sure what they will do or if it means they will clear it or not.

Anyway, I'm hoping we wouldn't have to do the waiver process as it will be expensive and time consuming...but we'll see...

Hi,

Has anyone had any experience with their partners (or themselves) giving birth in Phuket or Hat Yai? I am currently in Bangkok and going to a private hospital (very expensive...) which I like. However, I will probably either be moving to Phuket or Hat Yai in the near future to be closer to my husbands family (he is Thai).

Has anyone had any experience with Mission Hospital in Phuket? How does it compare to Bangkok Phuket Hospital? How about hospitals in Hat Yai...any recommendations? I would prefer to go with a doctor/hospital that is more open to natural birth.

Thanks!

Hi,

Hope someone can help...please no judgement's or smart comments as those won't help...just trying to get some genuine information.

We are currently in the process of applying for a IR-1 visa (spouse visa) for my Thai husband. We are on the 2nd part of the application (already been accepted by USCIS). My husband needs to get a criminal record check and this is where we are running into issues.

To make a long story short, he got arrested when he was 18 in southern Thailand for possession of marijuana. There were 10 other people there, so not only him was arrested. The amount of marijuana was very small-less than 1 gram I believe...

Anyway, he spent one night in jail and the next day went to court, paid 4,000 baht to avoid 2 months of jail time, apologized to a picture of the king, and was let go. He has not gotten in trouble since then (he is now 29).

We went to the police station in Bangkok to get his police record. We will get it, but we were both a bit shocked that he still had the marijuana possession on his record. We asked a Thai lawyer if there was a way to clear the record, but they said no...

We've considered going to the police station again and paying a "fee" to get rid of his record...but not sure that it would work or if that would be too risky.

I am working with a lawyer at the moment and they said that if it was less than 30 grams of marijuana you will not be barred entry to the US. I guess I just want to know if anyone has been in a similar situation and their husband/wife was still able to get a visa. It was over 10 years ago and such a minor crime, it seems ridiculous that this should have a huge impact on the possibility of him getting a visa.

One reason it is concerning is I am 5 months pregnant and really want him in the US for the child's sake especially. Any help would be greatly appreciated!

Kind of in a similar situation though I'm living in BKK. My partner (thai) and I are probably going to go back to the US to have the baby mainly because:

-better job opportunities

-free prenatal care/birth

-My family is there (though his family is in Thailand).

However, his visa might not be finished in time before the baby's due...so may have no choice but to have the baby here. It's a hard decision, I know. If you have the means of going back to australia...I would...but really only you can make that decision!

Thank you! That helps a lot!

Do they have sea bands here? If so, where could I get them? I could really use them for the morning sickness I have. I heard they work quite well. If they don't have them, is there anything else I could use?? Thanks!

Hi! I currently live in Bangkok and my partner (Thai) and I (falang) just found out we're expecting a child! I went to the Ladprao General Hospital for confirmation. The nurses and doctors were very nice and the doctor spoke OK English. However, we will probably want to choose another hospital. We live around the Chatujak area. Any recommendations? The doctor at the ,most recent hospital said I should come back in mid February...which would be 10 weeks for me. Do Thai doctors typically do the first prenatal check up 10 weeks or earlier? I know there were other posts about this, but thought I'd make my own.

Thanks!

Can anyone recommend a good dentist in Hat Yai? I live in a rural area near Hat Yai, and the dentists here are not...great. It seems their solution to a toothache is to automatically take out the tooth! If anyone also knows the price (for a cleaning, check up, etc,) that would be helpful. Thank you!

In Thailand, I do think it's more common for people to "borrow" things. My example is, though not about a motorbike, is...my BF had a nice guitar and let his friend borrow it. Then, without asking my BF, his friend let another friend borrow it (someone we did not know). That friend ended up letting ANOTHER friend borrow it...aaaand we haven't seen it since. In the west, we would consider this stealing...but my BF just shrugged and said he'd just get another one. I, on the other hand, was pretty angry that his "friend" would lose it....although the BF said his friend gave him 1,000 baht for losing it...which is ridiculous, because the guitar cost at least 8,000 bath.

Also, my sandals keep on turning up at my BF's mother's house...borrowing shoes without asking...quite normal I guess. Bit annoying though...

As for a motorbike...we do let family members use out motorbike, but usually they let us know first. If a friend asks to borrow a motorbike for 5 minutes, we'll let them. But if it's someone we don't know, no way. Sounds like your step-son basically let ANYONE use it...which I would put a stop to. You never know (as in the case of my BF's guitar) who may end up not returning it....

Hmm...I have yet to meet a teenager that young who has been married, and I live in quite a rural area. However, my sister-in-law had to get married with her BF when she was 19, because her parent's wouldn't let them live together if they weren't married. Another girl in the village (maybe 17 or 18) got pregnant, and right after, she got married with the father. I don't think it's an upward trend though...14 is way too young in my opinion. No way I would have wanted to be married that young...perhaps they had relations already and were forced to marry?? Who knows...

Personally, I think this how-to article is not very helpful...she just throws around the word "cute" a lot...and though I agree with some of her points, there are some I disagree with.

I guess you can call me old-fashioned, but I think it's good if a guy is willing to pay for the first date (which made me more attracted to my Thai BF I might add!) It shows that they have SOME money and shows a level of respect. Though if you want to split it...by all means...

I think the main thing for western women is to keep in mind that if they are looking for a serious relationship, they probably avoid sleeping together at least the first few dates....of course, I think this could go for any couple in any culture...but ultimately, it's up to the individuals involved.

I agree, you should dress conservatively when you meet the Thai parents, but you shouldn't have to "kiss up" to them. Just be yourself...and if they don't like it, well, they can just deal with it. Of course, be aware of the local customs and be polite, but I don't think ANYONE should have to kiss a** with any of their future in-laws...

And I also do wonder why this isn't in the ladies forum? I have a feeling we may not get too many mature replies from the guys...though useful/mature comments are welcome.

OK I moved it, but mark my words, you'll get less than useful/mature male replies here as well.

TV has a long-standing problem with the Ladies' Forum in that male posters tend to overrun it.

True, probably will get less replies. If you want to move it back to general you can...just thought it was more relevant in this forum. If there were more female posters, it would certainly be more interesting and less overrun by the guys.

Personally, I think this how-to article is not very helpful...she just throws around the word "cute" a lot...and though I agree with some of her points, there are some I disagree with.

I guess you can call me old-fashioned, but I think it's good if a guy is willing to pay for the first date (which made me more attracted to my Thai BF I might add!) It shows that they have SOME money and shows a level of respect. Though if you want to split it...by all means...

I think the main thing for western women is to keep in mind that if they are looking for a serious relationship, they probably avoid sleeping together at least the first few dates....of course, I think this could go for any couple in any culture...but ultimately, it's up to the individuals involved.

I agree, you should dress conservatively when you meet the Thai parents, but you shouldn't have to "kiss up" to them. Just be yourself...and if they don't like it, well, they can just deal with it. Of course, be aware of the local customs and be polite, but I don't think ANYONE should have to kiss a** with any of their future in-laws...

And I also do wonder why this isn't in the ladies forum? I have a feeling we may not get too many mature replies from the guys...though useful/mature comments are welcome.

heavydrinker, drinking too much these days? I'd say you've been drinking a lot, because a lot of what you say does not make any sense and basically you say that women should never fight back if they are being attacked?? So, if you were about to be raped/murdered, whatever...you wouldn't fight back or use pepper spray or anything, but wait until someone helped you out?? Not realistic....In fact, I've read somewhere (though can't remember where, sorry...) about how you're more likely to survive if you fight back and make a ruckus.

Thanks everyone! Very helpful. When I'm in Bangkok I will go check out these places. Although, I was thinking there must be a samsung shop in Hat Yai, so I could try going there before I go to Bangkok. My camera charger looked like this:

I'm hoping I can find the same one, but will take whichever one will work. I have a feeling it will be expensive compared to buying it online though. Oh well...I do still have the camera car charger...but I don't have a car to charge it with, so pretty much useless!

Hi everyone,

I will be leaving on a trip (out of Thailand) soon...actually next week.I want to take pictures obviously, but I seem to have misplaced my charger for my Samsung camera (SL502 series). If I don't find it, I'll need to buy a new charger, and possibly a new battery. I know they sell them many places online for cheap, but I won't have the time to have it mailed to my place in time before I go. I live near Hat Yai, but will be in Bangkok before I leave, and I'd like to know of any shops that I can go to that may have what I need? I thought about just going to Tesco and asking...sorry if it seems like a stupid question, but I've never bought a camera or any other technology for that matter other than my cell phone in Thailand.

Thanks!

Teacher17 and Scooterboy was this the first year for you both? It's getting tougher and tougher out there but I'm glad you both feel that you are still progressing in at least some areas. Your stories remind me of when I started:

After my first year, I suddenly became the computer teacher. I spent literally hours trying to keep these crappy old systems running, fixing mice, keyboards etc as I sat watching TV at night. Eventually I went to the boss and said "this ain't on- I want a pay rise, or else". After stalling me for a year (yes literally an entire year), he asked me to write a computer syllabus for the entire school and then I would get my rise. So I did. When I gave it in he stalled for another 6 months, then told me that what he actually needed was entire lessons (plans plus materials), and then I would get my raise. Luckily I did't kill him because he left at the end of the year, a new boss came in and I was promoted to coordinator, with a reduction in hours and a pay rise to boot!

Talking of year on year pay increments, my school was very cool, and used to give 10% increase every year, but I think it was pretty rare. The result of that though is they have several teachers who have been there for 7-11 years. They capped that 10% from now on- 2500/month is now the maximum increase from next year.

Meanwhile back on topic, I have definitely had a BAD year. 22 contact periods per week which is OK, but 8 grades (P5-M6), and 3 subjects (R&W, Phonetics and Computers), of the 22 periods I have 3 lessons that are repeated. I'm on holiday now- term bpitted 2 weeks ago. My holidays are paid, and we have to work summer school for 4 weeks once every 2 years, there is a bonus for that if you work it, but not too much 15-30k for the month maybe?

They've promised me next year will be better. I hope so- if I have to work 70 hours a week then I might as well get an international school salary, lol.

If anyone is in need of work come May PM me and I will happily make enquiries locally.

It's my 2nd year teaching here. I used to work for a high school, now it's primary student's for me. Wow...certainly had to go through lot's of loopholes to get your pay raise. Pretty ridiculous. I understand about teaching too many subjects/grade levels. Since I'm the only native English speaker at my school, they are making me teach all the grades and English subjects (i.e. speaking, reading, writing, etc). My school would not even consider a raise, let alone pay for my visa, WP, etc. Where do you work? Bangkok? I am considering moving there in a few months...don't really know bout the schools there at all, but hopefully I'll get some connections before I go!

It seems a "verbal contract" is quite common in the beginning. My director said he'd write my contract before I go on holiday, but nothing yet...not really expecting him to get it done before I leave.

This year was okay. Could have been better. But I've learned A LOT. Looking forward to next year since my school will actually have books for the kids, and they are making an official English Program. However, me being the only foreign teacher, means more work for me. No higher pay of course *sigh* But if things don't go well...I may leave early...I shall see...keeping my options open for now. I'm just looking forward to a break!

Thank you! I have also looked at the let's go books and I think they'd be good for the students. However, my...director, who since I am not naming or my school, is CLUELESS, seems to think that those books are not approved by the MOE....but I think they are?? I also liked family and friends...would that book be approved by MOE as well...? So annoying because I went to the bookstore the other day, and the staff or course, had no idea, but said they were used in government schools, so they assumed they would be ok.

Does the MOE pay for all English government textbooks? Or do the children's parent's normally have to pay for them? The children at my school are fairly poor..so it would be better to get reimbursed by the government than have each child pay for his/her book.

I'm not Thai, but am a woman, so I'll respond.

I also get sick of all the Thai women I meet saying to me, "Ohhh your skin is so white. I will trade my skin for yours!" It saddens me when my Thai friend's daughter (who is 6) tries to make her face white with powder and family members will actually tell her it's too bad that she's so dark skinned. Talk about growing up with low self-confidence. Of course, many people say it in jest...but still.

Has a lot to do with "class." If you're :Hi-so, then you should have white skin...but that's not always the case. I assume it's the same way in places like India, etc, where they follow the class system very seriously. Personally, I am kind of relieved they like white skin here in a way, because I hate tanning (sunburns, ouch!) One my my falang friends tans all the time, and she is going to get old way too soon! Not to mention, skin cancer...

Whenever my students at school tell me they want my white skin, I tell them that I think their dark skin is beautiful (which it really is) and they are always shocked when I say that.

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~ ~ ~ ~ you are a beautiful strong black woman ~ ~ ~

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ummm......ok.....?

I hate having to bring gender into the equation but actually harassment IS about gender dynamics, here and everywhere else. About whether carrying pepper spray or any other kind of weapon is a good idea or not, I think many males can simply not put themselves in the situation, because they are not women! After all, how many times a psycho has followed a guy with his dick out and tried to grope you? You can imagine how it feels I'm sure, but the again you cannot, really.

Good that the police says they'll send someone, but this is not over yet as I'm sure the perv will try again, it's just been a coincidence that these days I've not walked much because of the heat, and also I'll be going away for 2 weeks tomorrow, but things can still happen, and do I have to rely on the police to sort it out for me?? I think that still shows an ever greater lack of knowledge about Thailand. I'll not go out hunting him down (although in all honesty that's what I'd want to do) as I understand the dangers, but I have a right to defend my physical integrity when others can't. Could that potentially lead to trouble (as in what? ending up in jail for spraying this idiot? being thrown out of the country? Him retaliating and bringing his mates over?) Ok, so be it. It's called life and it's tough, more when you are a female on your own. It's a risk but as things are now the risk is there anyway.

By the way, although I haven't been here for long I can speak Thai, I think I managed to explain what happened to the police although I needed some help at times. I'm sure the psycho picked on me because he assumed "young foreigner living alone, no speaking Thai, won't complain". I was just so shocked when it happened that the words didn't come to me. The one thing I cannot yet do is give shit in Thai, so how do you say "<deleted> off"???

My thai boyfriend told me to say "bpai hai pon" which means <deleted> off... Sorry, not sure if that's the correct spelling....couldn't find it on thai translation

Agree 100%. Many of you (no offense, ok,) think like a man (well, because you are men,) and think that women shouldn't go out and protect themselves...which really, is not practical. We have the right (just like men) to defend ourselves. I also agree with SBK, in that, a whistle may not work...because many men don't get involved physically here. Have you seen the video of that Thai man berating the Thai women over her car? Although, there ARE many Thai men I know who wouldn't hesitate to get involved...but you could end up in a place where there aren't many people around. So...I still think pepper spray is the best option. A whistle is good to have as well.

Anyway, good for you for taking this to the police! Hopefully they do something about it.