fey

In a social scene like that where people are watching I just play it safe and say "thanks". Not worth it to me to "try to be thai" and do something weird or wrong.

I do find foreigners going over board on the Thai stuff a bit annoying, you have to strike a balance there.

I never wai men, but I do like getting and returning them from females. Most thai men I meet are beneath me in social status and make their living sitting on the corner all day on these adult tricycles looking foolish. Why don't they get jobs and support their families?

Why can't they wipe their own arse? Why do they think it's funny that they can't?

The numbers are just fodder for me.

Accurate reporting and investigation can't be done by people with little education or agencies with no research skills.

However, I do like the sites dedicated to death cases. Anything that attempts to convey a critical reality is a breath of fresh air for me.

Makes me think. Makes by brain work. And wipes that dung eating naive smile of my face every time.

Leave it up to your wife. I am sure she can rebuff him in the Thai way.

I believe you are thinking too much into this.

Your western ways won't work here in Thailand, same as my western ways don't work, I have realised that much in my time here.

No have Western or not Western.

hjave just ONE way..

Man protects his woman.

no matter how he IT.

writing statement to the police and hire a lawyer.

Hire guys who lose their abuser.

Himself amputate fingers peasant who apparently swept gangrene and accidentally print the wrong message to the phone ..

Give women New job or stay home... Etc..

Only one question as it is customary to do in Thailand

Really tired of this whining by grown men.

Take "Thailand" out of the equation. Handle it man to man like you would anywhere.

The lady brought the problem home to him, so it's green light to take care of it. Not "her way" or the "Thai way".

Seems some on this board use thainess as excuses for various things. Like some unknown factor that prevents them from acting like men. For example saying you can't lift a finger or a mob will come from nowhere to attack etc.

Grow some balls and address the situation no matter where you are. Don't get pushy whipped on cultural make believe or this Thai stuff.

Ask him over for tea and let him have it the same as you would in your home country.

There won't be 50 moto guys hiding in the closet (I promise)

Talk reasonably and firmly with all three of you there. If he denies it or thinks its a joke grab his crack and tell him you mean business.

If it makes you nervous watch a mob movie like goodfellas and step into the roll. Practice in front of a mirror before the meet.

problems started when you let thais friends/relatives become involved to closely.
i would have set boundries when they came over and were looking through the house before you moved in.

maybe you will get lucky and they are gone, but things could get worse if they keep coming over.

when i moved i used a thai agent but only became involved with the thais around as absolutely necessary. i wanted a good scene and vetted any problems before they sprouted. after the payment and contract doors were locked and anything i could do myself i did myself. even though it was a good scene he did make an unprofessional quip about his commission at the meeting after the contract was signed.

your dealing mostly with people with a high school education in a country where the education system is not that great and many cant problem solve or keep financial records clear. people just go into jobs without training and 'wing it'.

Some pent up anger being vented here, is it really worth it to stress out over 50 baht?

Considering the petty amount of money, why not just consider it a tip to a poor Thai person who is struggling along in life with a shitty job?

laughable response.

ive been harassed for rides daily for years. sometimes followed down the road as im walking. had to listen to these roaches and step around them in some cases.

and your suggesting a tip? you must be out of your mind.

hate these scumbags. i take into consideration not having to use them in my living arrangements.
these asian tuk tuk guys are like babies on tricycles, scooting around and waiting all day for a dollar fare, quite pitiful really.

i was eating at a stall often and discovered one day that the husband drove a tricycle, and started eating at another place just so he did not get the extra dollar.

sorry, this sounds a little like what happened with my neighbor and i awhile back.
turns out it was a control issue between us. i had things to do, and he wanted me to do something else.

lets remove the gf from the equation altogether, since that's not really your business, right?

I always tell people to read the book "Private Dancer". It is a must read and good read. It explains a lot about the Thai-Farang relationship and what the Tai lady is about in values, family,

and life. Read it and it will explain it all

private dancer is about a monger who tried to have a relationship with s hardcore bargirl.

thats not what this thread is about and explains nothing unless tour a sex tourist

They think you have more money than sense, just remember these people need to calculator to add 10=50.

after several years here i agree with you

many times its because thais cant read or do math

when i first got here i thought it was intentional, now probably half the time it happens i realize its stupidity or not dealing with teansactions well (usually due to rushing)

Of course it can be worse. Bangkok is a pretty safe place. You can make yourself scared of anywhere if you fixate on the bad news.

I was more fearful in London than ever I was in Bkk.

sometimes in BKK i like to just act like a tourist, not see the obvious, smile, and know that i'm out of there in a few days anyhow...and forget about the environment. i was in NYC and it was as safe as anywhere, and sometimes i worried a lot more than i needed. 90% of the time you use common sense, do you own thing, don't bother anyone, don't act aggressive, no eye contact unless saying "hi" and don't flash valuable.

the other 10%, unfortunately, is being in the wrong place at the wrong time. there is nothing you can do, things will be bad. and you really never know.....

yes, but certain places you have increased odds of "being in the wrong place a the wrong time"

I am fairly happy here. But, if I had the funds, and a substantial income, that would allow me to live anywhere, I doubt I would be living here. There are just too many problems and issues. Some of the areas that would be a huge concern to me if I was raising children, would be:

the fabulously inferior educational system, and the inability for children to question their teachers.

the inability for the kids to learn much about the world. geography, history, geopolitics, thailand's true place in the world, etc.

the nearly complete lack of positive role models for the kids here. how many Thai's have recently won Nobel Peace prizes, Pulitzers, Peabodys, Oscars, etc?

the ridiculous and outdated class system.

the utter refusal of the elites, and the government to acknowledge the need to improve education.

the succession of one incompetent government after the next.

the seeming unwillingness of the current regime, to let go of power.

the lack of law and order. the lack of traffic safety. the lack of regard for public safety.

the corruption, and the unwillingness of anyone in a position of power to do anything about it.

the human trafficking and slave trade issues.

the potential for the Thai economy to really take a bath, over the next decade.

the erosion of Thailand's standing within SE Asia.

the complete and utter lack of progressive minds, here in the LOS.

the complete lack of vision, when it comes to the future.

the lack of sustainable environmental and developmental policies.

the presence of a nationalist attitude and agenda. it holds the country back on so many levels.

lastly, my favorite peeve. face. the extreme level of cowardice, that an entire nation engages in, when they practice this act of shameful weakness on a daily basis. talk about the utter refusal to look within for the source of a problem. it is an abomination.

I could go on and on. But, I won't. Needless to say, there is tremendous room for improvement. No need to address the issues of the countries that are being considered. Just venting about some local frustrations.

Reading this it makes me wonder why you came to live in Thailand in the first instance. Its not as if your list didn't exist before you arrived.

It also makes me laugh a little when people have a good old rant about everything bad in Thailand, then call it LOS.

probably because its much better on vacation then it is to live here.

also considering spain and portugal. easy border hops and 3 month visas. taxes are a non issue for me since i wont be buying property anywhere outside my home country, just renting, and dont need to stay in country more then 6 months at a stretch (why would you?)

as to the question why are you still here in thailand, its just momentum at this point and laziness.

its easy to just get stuck here in a rut drinking and wasting time. i figure thats what happens to many as they age here.

the heat makes you extremely tired during the day, a few beers at night, the constant 'love bombing' and neediness of the women, turn around and 10 years have gone by.

I have been in a relationship with many a Thai woman and have yet to have one ask me for monetary help for her or her family. So to tell someone to prepare for that if they get involved with a Thai woman is total bs.

The woman I am currently seeing now went back home to Surin a couple of weeks ago because her father fell ill and was in the hospital. She paid the bill of 115,000 baht. She asked me for absolutely 0 baht. When I first met this woman and she came over to stay with me I honestly thought she was a hooker. The next day I took her home and handed her 1000 baht. She looked at me confused and asked what the money was for. I felt like a total jackass.

and you banged her on the first night, good lad.

he thought she was a hooker, but changed his mind when she refused payment

I am fairly happy here. But, if I had the funds, and a substantial income, that would allow me to live anywhere, I doubt I would be living here. There are just too many problems and issues. Some of the areas that would be a huge concern to me if I was raising children, would be:

the fabulously inferior educational system, and the inability for children to question their teachers.

the inability for the kids to learn much about the world. geography, history, geopolitics, thailand's true place in the world, etc.

the nearly complete lack of positive role models for the kids here. how many Thai's have recently won Nobel Peace prizes, Pulitzers, Peabodys, Oscars, etc?

the ridiculous and outdated class system.

the utter refusal of the elites, and the government to acknowledge the need to improve education.

the succession of one incompetent government after the next.

the seeming unwillingness of the current regime, to let go of power.

the lack of law and order. the lack of traffic safety. the lack of regard for public safety.

the corruption, and the unwillingness of anyone in a position of power to do anything about it.

the human trafficking and slave trade issues.

the potential for the Thai economy to really take a bath, over the next decade.

the erosion of Thailand's standing within SE Asia.

the complete and utter lack of progressive minds, here in the LOS.

the complete lack of vision, when it comes to the future.

the lack of sustainable environmental and developmental policies.

the presence of a nationalist attitude and agenda. it holds the country back on so many levels.

lastly, my favorite peeve. face. the extreme level of cowardice, that an entire nation engages in, when they practice this act of shameful weakness on a daily basis. talk about the utter refusal to look within for the source of a problem. it is an abomination.

I could go on and on. But, I won't. Needless to say, there is tremendous room for improvement. No need to address the issues of the countries that are being considered. Just venting about some local frustrations.

where would you go if you had the money and why?

forgot to mention having to look at and live around sex tourist scum

I had my new pair of nike tennis shoes stolen after I took them off to enter Wat Muen Ngoen Kong. They were certainly swiped by a farang as they wouldn't fit any Thai. My girl mentioned there were two farang with a thai woman leaving the Wat as we were entering, I hadn't noticed. We waited until everyone left and there was a dilapidated pair of New Balance tennis shoes left behind, two sizes too small for me. Watch out for your shoes when entering the religious shrines.

i always watch my $200 sneakers when i have to remove them at the door. they are too big for a thai but am afraid a poor one may try to sell them at the night market.

No - for sure!!!

Even the ones that have been and still are in a long term relationship would think nothing of 'moving onto the next one' immediately if things went south, seen it happen......very strange.

It's all to do with being kept / supported / taken care of, as soon as that stops - game over, 20 year relationship forgotten about in a couple of days.

absolutely, Thais will use the situation to be "taken care of"and "not work" and when that ends or another more lucrative opportunity come along its bye bye farang!

you can see this early on if you look for it while your dating.

have known several that were extremely good at just just cutting everything off in a forget it attitude when in a bad mood or at a perceived slight. much worse then i would get with a western woman.

i dont know if its some sort of deep seated anger at losing face, or some sort pf personality defect.

this type of response is unlikely to change down the road, esp if it happens at the beginning when the puppy love stuff is still going on.

i have found that thais won't express love the way im used to being from the usa.

specifically, thais dont often say i love you or express affection verbally. in daily interactions they can come across as cold and aloof.

this opens the door to doubts about what they are feeling if your used to talking about things in depth.

the void can cause a rift and jealousy, paranoia and insecurities creep in because in a western relationship if you say nothing your usually hiding something or are angry.

add in some communication and language barriers and it just makes things that much worse.

this aloofness and reluctance to verbalize feelings is a primary reason why i dont envision a cross cultural marriage.

learn to set boundries and say no

we get this in the usa, but its very rare if its not a close friend. the boundries here are much softer and your going to get people sponging, walking in your home etc if you cant set limits.

then again, i dont need much in return fortunately.

love the sarcasm in this site. guess i gotta get used to it.

thanks for the advice though, i figured leaving them secure and locked in my extra luggage. don't think they can make that disappear without anyone noticing lol.

really smart guy. now, can you figure out how to lock the door?

I looked at going back to US, we are staying. Mostly this is me being old and she nearly 40 herself, I don't see huge oppty gor jobs. On the contrary.

IMO rent, utilities, need for car, insurance all nails in the coffin.

I understand when guys complain about their grubbing 'girlfriends', Id survived many years in the bar scene.

I think what's mussed though is there are tons of great women here and many would not at all mind marrying a western guy that is active, relatively attractive and somewhat has his act together. My wife is totally cool. She has never disappointed me in the six years I've known her. She is an absolutely lovely human being.

I miss sharing cultural jokes but my wife has so much more about her I could never find in an American woman. She lovesand lives to travel, just like me. Western women like holidays, they teach overseas a year - but they cant live out of a bag. Further, women that love camping my age, non existant.)

I would like to speak of your above sweeping generalisation. Doubt you know many, if any, western woman teachers. The many I know love to travel, hence living and working abroad and can live out of a bag just as easily as you and your beloved could. Please, stop speaking for the abilities/disabilities of WW. How do I know? I am a western woman that has lived here for 8 years. Luckily,my work affords me many holidays. Along with other WW and some Thai friends we travel extensively and camping is a must for us. Oh, I almost forgot to mention, my previous job was with the National Park Service, I lived in a tent most of the summers working with a crew of Biologists, living out of a bag. I write this as I make my way back to Sin City / Pattaya after two weeks of camping on the islands of the Southern Andaman with other WW and Thai girls.

thread was about being able to afford living in thailand, not your wife

complicated answers for a simple question

as long as i needed to

If it is only two guys on a street then I think I would fight and go after each as if my life depended on it, and would win ! If 3 or more perhaps it is a swing like crazy and run like hell into a shop someplace near by and call police. This is a no win situation but I won't just sit and let cun/-s kick the shit out of me. They will also pay a price.

You want to see a Thai run a 100 yard dash? Get in a fight.

A mob of random, bitter guys will instantly arrive to kick your head in.

getting kind of tired of these fearful rants about lifting a finger and mobs appearing from nowhere to kick the foreigners arse. stems from anxiety of being in an unfamiliar place i suppose

situation would be the same as anywhere else thugs would attack. nothing wrong with responding as you would on home turf. do some damage and flee as soon as possible.

Why would you move to Thailand if you wanted to eat Western food?

I've never understood these people who move somewhere this far away from home, try to recreate their old lifestyle, then complain it's expensive to do so.

Mainly because I hate the Belgian weather, see this month of April rain and cold (les than 20C is cold)

Money isn't an issue. Recreate old lifestyle?

I've got to agree with Tarty, weather is my biggest lifestyle influence too.

With more minor considerations being food, booze and women.

TV, movies, books and internet are available online anywhere in the world.

outside: cold weather you can wear coats, hot weather you cant do anything

inside: break even, ac in hot weather, heaters for cold

certainly, breathing some nasty stuff daily from tuk tuks and old motorbikes.

i do a lot of walking and at least a couple times daily have to hold my breathe due to very strong visible fumes.

grew up in big cities in the west like sf, nyc and la so im no lightweight when it comes to pollution.

its really bad here due to lack of regulation and no controls on polluting vehicles, but i guess thats the price we pay for freedom over here.

zebras could be re-incarnated soi dogs who have stepped up after not biting people or causing problems

good karma have them stripes and they serve people now rather then being unwanted strays