Candude

1 hour ago, Retiredandhappyhere said:

Practically every aspect of Thai "culture" is entirely in the Thais' favour, as they inevitably end up with all or most of the money.

 

In most cases, the Farang husband builds or buys a house and yet guess who is the legal owner?  50% of anything bought during the marriage automatically belongs to the wife on divorce, even if bought entirely with the husband's earnings or pensions from abroad.

What about if you're married to a Thai and she builds a house with her own money, does it work the other way as well ? The Farang is entitled to 50% of whatever she owned in Thailand or acquires during the marriage ?  

I don't have that issue as she is basically building a house on the parent's land which will be transferred to her, (apparently), and she is paying for most of the house build where I helped out on some but much less than she did. Plus the family advised that no dowry needs to be paid but only shown for saving face . We'll see. :}

27 minutes ago, Elkski said:

I hate people who post if they don't read the whole thread. If I was a moderator  all those who don't read the thread or the article or have poor comprehension would be banned for a month.  

 

2500$ USD not a bad price for a wedding.  But perhaps this young man didn't have it and now he knows what crazy family he avoided.  

I agree. Although sometimes the threads go on and on. I usually read the whole thread so I get an idea of where people are coming from. 

As for the $2500 for the wedding. That is a great price. My first wedding cost me $35,000 and that was 25 years ago. Ended up in divorce, 18 months later. So, that amount in for a wedding is extremely cheap.  

But to stick to the topic, I have a hard time with "dowry" as I would rather help the family where and when I can but for the family to "expect" a dowry to save face is still a ridiculous culture which does translate in any other culture that this is all about money. Sad.  

13 hours ago, colinneil said:

Sad part of this story is brides family are only interested in money, not the couples happiness only money.

 

The marraige is doomed before it has begun.

I know many people keep saying that "this is Thai culture", but what about the culture other come from ? Read so many horror stories about sinsod/dowry that it's becoming pretty ridiculous in my opinion. I agree that if the bride loves the husband, regardless what  the parents expect in dowry, then the bride should explain to the parents that she will marry regardless of the dowry since the poor individual may not have the dowry. 

Yes, in my culture, the bride's parents pay for the wedding and there is no dowry. I understood that the dowry  is supposed to pay the parents for letting their daughter, (the expected income return), go but in reality any "caring" family would understand and return the dowry to the bride and groom to help them build their future. 

I understand there are cultures but I have always had an issue regarding this "dowry" to the parents given that the parents have sent their daughters out of the country to provide for them and when they marry, expecting money paid to them for "selling" their daughter.

I DON'T CARE HOW ANYONE ELSE SEES THIS BECAUSE NOBODY CAN CONVINCE ME OTHERWISE THAT THIS IS "SELLING" AND IF THE COUPLE IS HAPPY TOGETHER THEN THE DOWRY SHOULD BE DROPPED.

I am so fed up of hearing people say that it is "culture" or even worse to "save face". Both those sayings all boils down to money.  So yes, the family didn't care about the couples happiness, it was all about $$$$.