peteypie

There is, or rather maybe, a local precedent for this eradication of corruption. At the risk of being chewed out as a nutcase, I'd like members to view, dispassionately, the actions, and reasons behind the actions, of one Mr Pol Pot. The government of his country was corrupt beyond belief! In the pay of the 'Yankie Devil' and assorted others. So, in a pique of insanity, he unleashed his zealots to exterminate those corrupt individuals who were bleeding his country financially and morally dry. Sadly, as we all know, corruption was so ingrained, that all and sundry were put to the sword. I wonder if this this is what our great leader has in mind?

On a serious note here, I've asked almost all of the groups of students whom I've taught over the last four years this same question. These have been 'educated' people, BA students, MA students and even the odd PhD. I have yet to have anyone give me a good answer. The only thing I can think that has been invented here is chaos theory!

OK! Next scam will be, Thai International is sold off to the private sector at a huge discount. Small, up-start regional airline buys up most of the shares, sounding familiar? All international airlines are forced out to 'Cobra-Swamp' soon. We don't know when exactly as they keep moving the date! Small regional airline, plus the former 'Thai International' planes and crews etc, stay at Don Muang. Remember, they're only a small regional airline and won't clutter up the air space. Small regional airline starts international flights from Don Muang! Any takers? I'd say within two years if not sooner.

Avoid military service! It'll be the best fun you ever had. I enjoyed it so much, that I did it three times, in three different countries, boot camp and all! Call me mad but there's nothing like freezing your arse off in the Brecons in mid-winter, frying your gonads off in some ant infested waddie or frantically swinging out your rigging lines as the earth screams up to meet you. You'll make the best mates of your life out there, and everything after will be gravy. Don't fight it, enjoy it.

The wife's sister was bitten by a king cobra a couple of months ago. She was in hospital for five days. She lives in the center of Bangkok, in a second floor apartment. The bugger was sleeping behind the toilet when she went for her morning constitutional. Hope this doesn't put you off going for a dump in the morning. It's the truth! No sh*t!

Slim, I may be a retard but my wife got the visa! I guess I read and understood the visa application process better than you and your wife did?! Remember, if you can't take the heat, stay out of the kitchen.

Hello Slim, I'm sorry that your girlfriend told the ECO that she was working at a handbag factory in Samut Prakan, that she has no daugther and that she intends to stay with you in the UK after you are married. I guess you should be giving her the rollocking not me?! I'm also sorry to hear that you are having to go back to the UK for an operation. Why not have the operation here in Thailand? It would save you all the hassle and costs of going back there to do it? Oh! G** forbid that something should go wrong while your in hospital (I truly mean that) If however it should, then your girlfriend and her 'daugther' may end up being taken care of from public funds while you get well. Oh, one last thing, I assume that if your doing visa runs, you are on a tourist visa? If you've only done one 'visa run' that means you've been in country for just over 3 months, am I correct? All sounds a bit strange to me, no wonder the ECO knocked her back. Before I get my head bitten off, remember, your girlfriend has a house, she has a new car, which you are paying for no doubt, she may have a 10 year old daughter, which it appears she told the ECO she didn't, and the Shitzu, (is that a breed of dog with a bad dose of the squits) well, I quess a normal dog wasn't classy enough for a Mai Falang?! On a helpful note, if you live for 4 years with your girlfriend, here in thailand, and can prove it, you can then go to the UK without all this hassle. Check out the FCO website, it gives you all the info. Good luck Slim, sounds like you may need it.

Hello Mal2004, sadly, I don't own a car, so I can't play with a CB on the carpark ( CB, weren't they fitted in the Ark?) I'm sorry that I touched a raw nerve. However, as I'm not 'just off the boat', maybe I'm a little more cynical then your, as I've seen and heard of all the scams that go on in Thailand. As I said in my e-mail, I hope that the woman you have married will be able to get her visa and join you in the UK. If however, things don't go as planned, ask yourself why? The Embassy isn't there to screw you over, they are trying to protect you, me, and everyone else out there. Sometimes in Thailand cynicism can go a long way. I hope that you don't learn to be cynical the hard way, like many falang have before you. I hope that it does work out for you and your wife, and please remember that my words are ment as a little red warning flag not as a stick to beat you over the head with. Good luck and tread carefully.

Jeff1, Yes, no problem about PMing me. I think we have to go through the ###### though?... Hello ######, you out there?

Hello Ajahnlau, Yes, strange but true. Even though most people think that Chiang Mai is the centre of the universe, after the ###### hole of Bangkok that is, Korat is in fact a BIG city! Check www.nso.go.th/pop2000/finalrep for the results of the last census. I don't think things have changed so much, if they have, Korat has in fact got even bigger. I'm sure that you are aware that Korat (Nakonratchasima) province is the BIGGEST province in Thailand. In the 2000 census (the last full census) 2,556,300 people lived in the province. Of those, 21% or 536,823, lived within the official city boundary of Korat. Chiang Mai province had 1,500,100 people, of which 26% or a mere 405,027 lived within the official city boundary. So, unless the government statistics office is wrong (always a chance of that) Korat is in fact the second largest city, by population, after Bangkok.

Dear ######, isn't it about time that this board had a 'Falang meets Thai girl, sells the farm, gets stung' section? Then it would give all of us some food for thought before we do actually sell the farm! I've just seen yet another falang acquaintance, who met his Thai girlfriend through a dating agency, seen off to the tune of nearly 1 million baht! Shouldn't these agencies and their girls be blacklisted somewhere? It appears that the Brit Embassy is doing its best to stem this trade and shouldn't we be thanking them for it? If your girlfriend or wife has been refused a visa, instead of sounding off at the Embassy, how about investing in a private detective to do a little research for you? Hopefully, she'll come up clean and you can fight the good fight, if she doesn't, a couple of beer tokens to the guy at the Embassy wouldn't go amiss.

As an ajarn at a large, popular university in central Thailand, I take great pleasure, when I meet my new students, in informing them that the girl with the darkest skin in the class is the most beautiful! This is always met with hoots of laughter my her classmates. I then go on to tell the other pale, sick looking female students, that I expect them to do extremely well on the course, as it appears from the colour of their skin that they must spend all of their time at home studying!? This has the effect of wiping the smiles from their faces. Generally, and this could be worth some serious research, the darker the skin, the better the student. Are there any other ajarn out there who have found this to be true?

Be aware, I recently had a large amount of money transfered from the UK to my Thai bank account. My sister, in the UK, had this money Direct Wire Transfered to the said account. The UK bank said that it should clear into my account within two days. However, It didn't arrive for 8 days!! My Thai bank said that they didn't have it when I enquired. My UK bank said that it was in Thailand and should be in that bank. It transpired that it had sat for 6 days in Standard Chartered's office in Bangkok! Standard Chartered deals with most transfers from the UK. They had refused to release this money until they'd scooped some interest on it?! They then charged my Thai account for the pleasure! It wasn't my Thai banks fault and I'd been 'riding' them for a week. I had to take in a box of cakes to make amends.

GSM, One-Two-Call!

My local cable provider took off the BBC News and replaced it with Fox News! I thought that this was his idea of a tasteless joke. So, when he came to collect his monthly fee, I told him to shove his cable where the sun don't shine! If I was an American, I'd be highly embarrassed to have this type of 'news' programme associated with my country.

The Great 2 baht mobile phone scam! Our Great Leader and CEO does it again. I'm sure that you've all seen the latest adverts on the TV and on billboards. '15 day offer, 2 baht per minute' . What all the advertising fails to tell you is that once your 15 day trial period expires, you find that although you have money left in your old 4 baht account, and more importantly for many phone users, loads (in my case 6 months worth) of 'spare time' accumulated, the 'spare time' has suddenly vanished. To use your remaining money, you have to go out and buy yet another 300 baht phone card and begin accumulating time all over again!!? If this isn't the biggest scam going, I don't know what is? Imagine, everyone is suddenly offered a chance for a few cheaper phone calls (at the price we pay now, about time too) . Everyone is going to jump at the offer, and after checking that there is no catch (my initial impression, sadly proved correct) we go for it. Then we discover that our poverty stricken CEO's company (very sad, he only made 10 zillion billion last year) has done a number on us! As for me, I'll just put it down to another 'This Is Toytown' experience. However, imagine the small community that relies on a community mobile phone to stay in touch with friends and family. The TOT iare so pathetic that they can't connect these people, and if you can ever find a pay phone that works , or has been emptied in the last few years, your a better man then I am. So, there they are, the poor and isolated, with their community mobile. They've accumulated loads of spare time and are happy. Oh Great One's company offers them a discount for 15 days. Yes! go for it. Now, they find themselves with no 'spare time' buffer and having to find the three hundred baht to continue in operation. If this isn't an insidious way to make more profit, I don't know what is? Shame on you Oh Great One, and if this is yet another example of how you plan to run this country, then G help us all.

DJB, Having worked for HM government in a similar type of establishment as the British Embassy, Bangkok, the first thing I would advise, and this is ment in the obvious understanding of your frustrations, 'take a chill-pill' before entering the premises. Your frame of mind will determine the Immigration Officer's frame of mind. If you go in next time thinking Oh no! Not that fat b**tard again, then he'll do all within his powers to screw you. Remember, he has to sit on his fat behind day in day out dealing with us! Like the other replies have stated, you go in with ALL the paperwork, ALL signed sealed and delivered, two copies of everything in nice plastic covered binders. You wear a nice clean shirt, with tie and pressed trousers. Your girlfriend dresses likewise, in conservative clothes. You act real nice, smile a lot, you call everyone Sir or Ma'am. Your girlfriend does loads of Ka's, and Wai's to all and sundry. If you don't have the right documents, you apologise for wasting their time and come back again. Look at it from their side of the glass, they have one hundred plus people coming in per day, most of them without the documentation they need, which allows them to legally issue a visa. They have to be polite to all the knuckleheads (I've been one myself on many an occasion) who roll up un-prepared and who then 'throw a wobbly' because they can't get what they want. Also, their duty is to protect not only you but your girlfriend/wife from possible abuse!? So, please remember that 'Fatso' and his friends behind the glass are only following the rules put in place to protect you and the girlfriend. He isn't trying to screw you around, he's just a bit disappointed that yet another 'client' has rolled-up to make demands while grossly under prepared and has used up the time allocation of someone who was prepared but couldn't get into the room on that day! Do it right, and you'll get exactly what you want. Good luck next time.

I go regularly to Laos with my Thai wife. If you go for three days only, she can do it on her Thai ID card. There is a small travel agents office alongside the small Laos-Thai Friendship Bridge bus terminal at Nong Khi. Go in, get your girlfriend to fill out the form, hand over two passport sized photos, a photocopy of her ID card and 200 baht. They'll organise the 3 day permit in about 20 minutes. You then go over the bridge pay your 70 baht entry fee and that's it! Easy as pie. However, as your not Thai, you'll need your passport and about 1,500 baht to get your Laos entry permit on the Laos side. You fill out the form there and hand it in at the little window. Give the customs officer a nice big smile and if it's not busy, you'll have your 14 day visa in about 10 minutes. If your working in Thailand, remember you'll need a re-entry permit from the Thai side otherwise your year visa and work permit will become null and void! Enjoy and good luck.

Strange but true. Back in the late seventies, I was crossing into Canada at the Blackpool border crossing. I was on a Greyhound, as I was pretty hard-up at the time. The Canadian Customs officer wasn't too sure about me and passed me onto his plain clothes colleague in a small side office. After explaining to this guy that I was going to spend a couple of weeks with an old friend who lived in an outer suburb of Montreal, free of charge and for only a couple of weeks, he made a phone call to that person to varify my story. He then stamped my passport with an entry visa for one month, apologised for the delay and sent me on my way. Well, 12 years later!!!! I was at the same customs post and in the same situation. This time I was sent to their new suite of offices across the road, told to sit in a small office and await a customs officer who would interview me. When the guy came we started talking about my travels throughout the USA. Suddenly, there was a voice from the other office, Hey! I know you, you came through here 12 years ago and went to stay with the gal who lives in blah, blah , blah!! I couldn't believe this guy. He even remembered my first name, almost to the day that I passed through the border, and the girls family name! Not only did his colleague stamp my passport but he, at the end of his shift, drove me to my friends front door. So, it appears that all customs people aren't w***ers, some have incredible memories and they do treat people like human beings.

It's not about the physicality of driving, it's about what's going on inside the persons' brain. As Asian culture tends to have a different concept of 'self', (read Scollon and Scollon, 2001. Intercultural Communication 2nd ed. Oxford. Blackwells Publications) therefore the awareness of others, those not part of that self, also differs. Whereas the average 'farang' has the culturally enforced concept of others as being part of our own personal environment and are therefore aware of their presence, many Asians, and in this case specifically Thais, only see their close relatives and friends as being part of the equation. Others, ie other road users, are therefore not regarded as being there! They are not part of the physical and visual arena which makes up the 'family circle' the image of 'self' that they are used to. Am I losing people here? Let me give you an example. You're in a restaurant with your wife and kids, a crazed lunatic runs in and begins shooting people, what do you do? Yes! You grab your wife and kids and hit the floor. You don't even consider the other people in the restaurant until your family is safe but then you do consider them and do your best to save them. The first part is the Asian concept of self. That blinding, instinctive impression of who is around us and who is valueable is what is happening to your average Thai driver all of the time. He/she isn't aware that you are there or that their driving is creating a problem for other road users, there isn't anyone else on the road as far as they are concerned! Only when they hit you, or some other road user, does the second stage kick in. As for the actual quality of driving skills, well the next time you follow a vehicle up a narrow soi, notice how the driver will stop and not attempt to go through a gap which your average farang driver could drive a tanker truck through without slowing down. This one I'm not so sure about. Thai drivers seem unable to judge lengths and widths of spaces? Also, you never see Thai drivers attempting to reverse a vehicle into a road side parking space? Again lengths and widths? When they turn into a soi in their car, they swing out into the road before turning left into the soi, just as though they had a 'semi' with a 40 foot trailer behind? Obviously, if these people have actually had driving lessons, their instructor taught them to do these things, why? Anyone out there got any ideas? On a closing note, as a former driving instructor, I've yet to meet or see a Thai to whom I'd even consider giving a driving licence to. As a farang motorcycle driver, I've had to learn to reign in my temper so many times that it isnt real. Only after reading the aforementioned book, did I truly begin to realise that all Thai drivers weren't trying to kill me personally, they just didn't know I was even there!! Now, whenever I have a near death experience, I just smile at the offender and think 'ji yen yen' I feel more at peace with myself and don't give myself high blood pressure. Oh! I also drive through red lights, the wrong way down the dual-carriageway, always on the hard shoulder, never look when I turn out of my soi, overtake in front of oncoming traffic and feel I'm becoming more Thai every day?! Everyone I encounter and cut up always smiles at me, it's great.

Hello Jeff1. I lived happily in Korat (The seconded largest city in Thailand and the capitol city of the Isaan region) for a couple of years. By your comments, I'm wondering if you were actually in Korat or not!? It has some great pubs and bars that stay open until the early hours. The restaurants are the best you'll find outside of bangkok (If not better as the food is cheaper and easily as good) A couple of places that I used to go to regularly are the 'Bulay Saloon' on the eastern side of the old city, any tuk tuk driver will know it, and 'Ban Korat' a couple of streets further south of the Bula Saloon. The Bulay Saloon has a resident 4 piece band who do covers in English, with a fantastic female guitarist/singer. They also have a pool table, serve good food and all the booze you need. Ban Korat is more of a local's place but you'll be more than welcomed. They have Thai bands on, who play great Thai covers and other soloists who specialize in Isaan songs. Again, good food and booze and a lively atmosphere. As for eating out, there is Steak Jim Jao on the same road as Ban Korat but back towards the city centre. If your young (ie mid-twenties) then head out to the main road that passes Rajabhat Korat. This is full of bars and restaurants catering for the students. If you're older, you can try places like The Magic of Food on the way towards the main railway station. Here you have older single women and good music again. If you're just in town to get your rocks off, then opposite Klang Plaza is Ginza Palace, the best knocking shop in town. On the same street are loads of restaurants and bars. On weekends, you can head out to Bung Talua for the horse racing (Yes! Korat has it's own race track) and when you've watched the races you can watch the ladies jogging around the bung. You got ten-pin bowling in both Klang Plaza and The Mall, 4 outdoor swimming pools, sports centers galour and the best looking women in Thailand, bar none. What more could a man want? Forget Chiang Mai and Bangkok, Korat is the center of the universe. Enjoy.

All I can say is that I'm glad I don't live in the God aweful places you guys live in! A bottle of Chang at more than a hundred baht! What the ######'s going on? My local shop sells it at 30 baht a bottle?! As for quality beer in Thailand, well lets forget it. The only place in Asia that I think you can get a good quality brew is in Laos! Yes! Laos!! Beer Laos has got to be the best beer going and if only they had a sea port I'd be in the export business by now. So, if you want a good drop of the amber necktar head across the border to Vientianne.

All I can say is that I'm glad I don't live in the God aweful places you guys live in! A bottle of Chang at more than a hundred baht! What the ######'s going on? My local shop sells it at 30 baht a bottle?! As for quality beer in Thailand, well lets forget it. The only place in Asia that I think you can get a good quality brew is in Laos! Yes! Laos!! Beer Laos has got to be the best beer going and if only they had a sea port I'd be in the export business by now. So, if you want a good drop of the amer necktar head across the border to Vientianne.

I was bitten by a large 'Bitsa' (bitsa this and bitsa that) while living in Israel. As I was armed at the time, I shot it dead on the spot! My friend and I loaded the flopping corpse into the boot of his car and drove to the local vet's college, where they sliced off the top of it's head with a band saw, removed it's brain and took a sample of the brain to their lab. The up shot of the result was that it didn't have rabies.....only a serious headache. As for the dingbat neighbour with the Doberman, well do the dog before it does you!

Dear All, I'm sure that at sometime or other you have had need of a tradesman to do repairs on your properties. In Thailand this can be a un-nerving enterprise, as often the quality of workmenship leaves much to be desired. It's often a case of 'near enough is good enough' and then they hit you with the bill!! However, there are a few people pout there who will surprise you. I happen to meet one of these guys last week while doing work on my town house in JoHo (outer suburb of Korat) I needed electrical work doing and this included the fitting of a water pump, the whole nine yards you could say. My Thai wife's ex-neighbour is a time served electrician with the Royal Thai Army. He is now retired and has gone into business for himself. He came to our house and worked non-stop from 08:00 until 20:00, fitted the pump, put in a big room fan, fixed numerous lights and added many electical sockets. Apart from the cost of the fixtures and fittings, he charged us 750 baht for his labour !!! His workmanship was first class and he has the contacts to do any other type of work, such as bathroom fitting, carpentry, you name it. I would like to highly recommend this tradesman to other members of Thaivisa.com. Although his English is very limited, his daughter can get by in the language. If you have a Thai partner or friend, they can give him the instructions he'll need to do a first class job. Below are his details.

Name: Khun See (Ex Warrant Officer 1st Class)

Home Telephone Number: 044-294114 Mobile Number: 01-9663822