VitalGirl

I know a Thai who has 3 wives. #1 is his legal wife and is in her 50s. #2 is in her 30s and #3 is about 20.

All 3 wives live in the same house. He seems happy and I've never heard him complain or speak of any problems at home.

The majority of other married Thais I know have girlfriends or mias which leads me to speculate that there must be a lot of guys who don't have a female partner at all, or a lot of ladies are doubling up or there simply wouldn't be enough to go around (might explain why there are so many katoeys...making up the numbers?).

If you understand that whatever line gets spun publicly or during the courtship, the 1st wife in most developing economies (Thailand included) is largely an economic and status decision, then the whole Thai mia noi makes perfect sense from the guy's point of view. If you understand that for Thai women to be older and single is also a big social no-no, one understands why some Thai women might tolerate it. But I think we're being naive here too... western men play around every bit as much, possibly more, but we have different names for it and westerners generally don't stick with one mia noi. Maybe in some ways Thai men are better at commitment that western men?

Is it possible, does anyone think, that there was more to this by way of background than simply the paperwork problem?

This woman has caused untold hardship to many small businesses in CNX. Example - several weeks ago she decided to close the Tapae Square Market on Sunday so she could run a special "Fair" for people affected by the recession. Consequently 200+ families lost their income for the week with about 2 days warning. Of course, most of the people exposed to the goods on sale were the tourists (who were a little bewildered) and the sales staff of shops nearby (who already have well paid jobs) who got to pick over the bargains. And the struggling Thai businesses who got to sell in the Square? None other than that tiny family run business CP! What, they don't have enough retail outlets already? The poor people who really did need those bargains don't come into the tourist strip on Sundays... or anyday.. too expensive. That's one example among many. Thank goodness some sense has prevailed (however it was achieved) and CNX gets a chance through another election - lots of small businesses hoping for a better ourcome next time.

well, just looking for an informal class with a good teacher really- not a fan of big classes that are expensive and have a lot of advertising involved etc. i will check some places out when i get there, and also mantak chia i guess (is he a teacher???)...

I picked up a brochure this week in the vegie restaurant on Tapae Rd (excellent BTW) for Blue Garden Yoga... Ratchamanka Rd Soi 4, down next to Smile Guest House. Also know there is a good class in the Soi opposite Tapae Gate (just a few metres round from Art Cafe) - please PM if these vague instructions not enough.

It was on our list to go out and buy one this week, after our 4 year old started using a similar program at pre-school. Thank you.....

Ventolin is only a broncho-dilator and actually doesn't improve anything - sometimes has horrible side effects too like a racing heart. I too have suffered this problem since being in Thailand for over 5 years - after trying everything (including unsuccessful attempt with the Ventolin) I went to an asthma/allergy specialist who put me onto a one-puff-at-night "new generation" asthma drug called Seretide. Amazing! Problem gone. Ironically none of the top class "farang" hospitals here in Chiang Mai had a clue how to help, including their asthma "specialists". The lady who got it sorted is a humble Thai doctor who studied in Hong Kong and Singapore - luckily I speak Thai and she spoke a smattering of English. Might add cost a fraction of the farang doctors here. PM if you would like more help.... Good luck.

Seretide works for me as well (I had the same symptoms as OP described). Don't know what I'd do without it. Most chemists sell it over the counter, except Boots for some reason. Often takes a few days use for full effect.

But what's the cause of all this?

Time and again I hear of adults who weren't particularly allergenic in Farangland but then start to develop rhinitis, asthma, or bronchial problems when in Thailand for any length of time. It's not 'normal' IMHO.

Smog/pollution is my best bet.!

The one thing all the many doctors I consulted agreed on was that is was probably started by a viral infection. Why more in Thailand? Temperature (happy little viruses like the warmth), rampanmt use of antibiotics in Asia and, according to the Chinese doctor, a huge influx of viruses Westerners have never been exposed to via Burmese people... we just have no immunity. My troubles all started after a one week trip to Burma which ended in 3 months of viral pneumonia. Some of the doctors maintain the virus stays in the system at low levels, others argue super-sensitivity of the bronchial system. Not especially smog induced... more irritated by air conditioning, changes in temperature and dry air. My worst times are not the smog season here, but the cold nights and mornings of the cool season.... and yes, the barometric pressure drop at night. Chinese docor swears this is the major cause of night coughing.

Thanks for that FBN. I will try those options. Yuwadee does sometimes complain of a breathing problem when she has the symptoms. I know Ventolin has been around a long time - how safe is it to use regularly ?

Ventolin is only a broncho-dilator and actually doesn't improve anything - sometimes has horrible side effects too like a racing heart. I too have suffered this problem since being in Thailand for over 5 years - after trying everything (including unsuccessful attempt with the Ventolin) I went to an asthma/allergy specialist who put me onto a one-puff-at-night "new generation" asthma drug called Seretide. Amazing! Problem gone. Ironically none of the top class "farang" hospitals here in Chiang Mai had a clue how to help, including their asthma "specialists". The lady who got it sorted is a humble Thai doctor who studied in Hong Kong and Singapore - luckily I speak Thai and she spoke a smattering of English. Might add cost a fraction of the farang doctors here. PM if you would like more help.... Good luck.

Update:

Particles from outdoor fires pose health hazard in North

CHIANG MAI: -- The fine dust in northern provinces is eroding air quality, posing a threat to respiratory health and prompting the authorities to beef up measures to prevent forest and outdoor fires.

The Natural Resource and Environment minister is scheduled to discuss outdoor-fire prevention and air pollution with eight northern provincial governors at Chiang Mai City Hall tomorrow.

The Pollution Control Department's air-quality stations reported that dust particles of 10 microns in Chiang Mai, Lampang and other northern provinces yesterday at 9am were above 120 micrograms per square metre (mpsm) and the Air Quality Index (AQI) score was higher than the safety standard of 100.

Central Chiang Mai's air-quality station at Yupparaj School measured 10-micron dust at 149.6 mpsm and an AQI score of 113, while Lampang reported 272.5mpsm and an AQI score of 166. Chiang Rai had 181mpsm, Nan 141.3mpsm, and Phayao 145.6mpsm.

A 15-per-cent increase of respiratory patients was reported at Lampang Central Hospital in the past week, hospital director Songwuth Sabthavisin said.

Chiang Mai environment officer Phuchong Insompan said the hotline 05 340 9345 on outdoor fires had received 60 calls since January 1, with roadside forest fires the most frequently reported, especially in Mae On, Chiang Dao and Chaiprakan districts. In March fire-prevention officials will be dispatched to Hot district, where farmers are expected to burn some 10,000 rai of woodland to plant maize.

-- The Nation 2009-03-01

Thank you for the PHONE NUMBER - infinitely more constructive than most of what I've read tonight (other than Priceless... thank you too). We live along the Ping on the outskirts of town and our neighbours (ALL of them) burn off nearly daily. On the way back from the local noodle shop today (all of 1 km at most) we counted 11 black rings that we could see from fires in the last 1-2 days. We do have loads of big leaves which don't readily decompose when its so dry and it attracts a scary number of large snakes and scorpians - a few weeks ago the local lads caught a 4-5 metre long python just outside our house. However, that said, my immediate neighbours on both sides burn household rubbish and plastic either after dark or early morning (usually 5.00am)... my husband assures me its to save the 7 baht they might have to splurge on the rubbish bag. But I also question that - the gardeners for the huge mansion across the street also burn and they surely aren't scratching for a baht. Could we not make friends with each other and come up with possible solutions... gosh, doesn't that sound rash? If we got some inspiring entrepreneur to put up for a mulching machine and we used some refugee labour to produce sensational compost that we exported to areas with soil degredation? Maybe Thailand could forget about propping up the corn/sugar/rice etc price and be at the forefront of something amazing? My experience of Thailand tells me if you can turn it into a marketable product, you have a chance at change... Our local neighbours (the very same plastic burners) are actually incredible recyclers of every scrap of paper and glass BECAUSE THEY GET PAID FOR IT. Lots of the plastic they burn is the stuff they can't sell. What good are we complaining about this? Please PM me if you think we could work up an idea that we could communicate well to a Thai decision maker or entrepreneur. What do they say... if you're not part of the solution, you're part of the problem.

In a week I will be heading for Thailand. I want to spend my energy on beads, making necklaces is my hobby.

I am planning to circle around Chiang Rai, but I haven't booked a ticket BKK-CR yet. So anyplace is possible (no big cities though) Maybe I am just waiting to find the best place for finding the most beautiful beads

Do you also like to bead? Which are your favourate (online) beading suppliers?

I love Thai silver beads and gemstones, I hope to find them during my stay.

Is it easy to buy beads supply online?Also from neighbouring countries?

Are there online beading forums in Thailand for English speakers?

Hope to find some beading buddies here!

Let's Bead 'n Roll!

There are some great bead shops in the Thai market in Chiang Mai... also quite a few gem shops doing beads (cheap!) and LOADS of silver/hilltribe stuff.... if you think you're coming to Chiang Mai, send me a PM and I'll give you a list... lots of the stuff you can buy here in Chiang Mai also comes form neighbouring countries. Haven't beaded anything much in ages (like since I cane to live here about 6 years ago) but ironically just last night set the intention to bead up a really gorgeous skirt... If you're here for more than a day or two, maybe you can inspire me.... Safe travels.

I really want to do a meditation retreat within the next couple of months in Thailand, and I'm having a heck of a time choosing a place to go! There is just so much information out there, but it's hard to find good, recent information specific to what I want to do.

I think I've narrowed it down to these four:

1) Goenka center (in Pachaburi, I believe, but doesn't matter which one I don't think)

2) Wat Ram Poeng, in Chiang Mai

3) Wat Doi Suthep, in CM

4) Wat Suan Mokkh

Can anyone help?

Above all, I'm looking for a place that is going to help me realize as many benefits of meditation as possible, and instruct me in the most useful forms of meditation (I think I want something in the vipassana style, but I really don't know for sure).

To reach this end, I've thought of some other qualities the wat or retreat center would have (i.e. my wish list).

- Daily instruction, in good, intelligible English, taught by someone with considerable experience

- Can talk with guides about problems, clarification, etc, if necessary

- Focus on meditation, not too too heavy on Buddhism (I don't mind learning about Buddhism also, it's just not my goal). I think I'd feel really weird about doing morning alms routes...

- Quiet environment with clean air and private areas, hopefully no dogs, and walls aren't too thin. Hopefully not too many tourists where I'll be meditating.

- No cost, or very low cost (I plan to donate, but just am untrusting of places that charge more than 2000 baht or so for 10 days.

- Not a cult

- 10 days, although am considering 10-30 days as well

- Great reputation

- Clean

- Somewhat comfortable sleeping area? I have some minor/moderate back issues, so I'm not too keen on a rock for a pillow.

Are there any other major qualities to consider? Are there any other places with good reputations that meet these criteria as good or better than above?

1) Goenka center: I've heard of many people getting great results from this program. The instruction is in English, but by video. Definitely focus on meditation, seems quiet, no cost, 10 days. Some people here have called it a cult though, but as many people say it is not. I've also read this Goenka guy is a former businessman, and the fact there are so many of these centers around the world (like a chain McDonalds or something), puts me off a bit. Also, will the guides there really understand my issues in English? I'm a hair concerned about lack of adequate instruction as well. I know it's intense, and that doesn't really put me off.

2) Ram Poeng. Also has a good reputation it seems. But seems a bit heavy on the Buddhism influence. Just seems a little funny that I have to bring 11 lotus flowers, etc, and circle around a Chedi 3 times and do all this chanting. Does that actually have any benefit? Also the focus seems to be on the 26 day retreat. Is the 10 day retreat program a bit neglected? Have heard there are lots of dogs at night. Definitely not a cult, and no cost. Sems to have good English, although can't confirm. I know nothing about the teacher.

3) Wat Doi Suthep. Seems popular... the website and information don't seem any diferent from Ram Poeng, but everyone seems to say it's not as good as the others. Why?

4) Suan Mokkh: Seems to have pretty high standards, I really like that there is a yoga/exercise component as well. I like that it has a walking and sitting meditation, but does that make it a less powerful experience than Goenke, which is just sitting? It seems to have the right amount of emphasis on buddhism, just enough to be educational, without detracting away from the meditation instruction component.

Reading your evaluation of the four choices, it seems like you're leaning towards Suan Mokh and I would agree that's probably the better of the four. Doi Suthep is a tourist trap and also heavy on the Thai Buddhist traditions, which don't always have anything much to do with meditation or enlightenment... I have recomended some travellers to the Forest Temple close to Mae Hong Son, and had rave reviews back from them.... you'll have to Google it (from memory it's like 60km out of town) but it is listed on some tourist maps etc so shouldn't be too hard. At then end of the day, you may get benefit from trying ALL of the places (over years, of course) and then developing your own, personal style.... Good luck...

Hi!

I heard that thai doctors suggest c-section simply becuse it is easier to plan.

They will know when so they do not need to be called in in the middle of the night.

Most doctors live close by their hospitals and the pregnancy-doctors are "on duty" 24/7 if there is a birht coming up.

I also heard that most thai woman are afraid of the pain of a natural delivery.

According to a research that was presented in an european newpaper and a natural birth is so much better for the female body than having a c-section.

The healing process after giving birth is more rapid and the risk of infections are less than with a c-section.

After any surgery most people are adviced to eat antibiotics wich can´t be very good for breastfeeding, I imagine.

Take care!

Comehome

"I heard" is always a very dangerous way to start talking about something which you have not directly experienced... I have experienced a very non-elective C section here due to imminent uterine rupture (after 26 hours of highly supported natural labor) - never was I offered an antibiotic, nor was there any need - also experienced rapid healing of my less than 2 inch scar that is easily covered by even the skimpiest bikini. Discussion of this C section option with my Thai female OBGYN during my pregnancy was very enlightening - many Thai women have confided in her that they are scared of being sexually undesirable with a stretched vagina and are encouraged by other Thai women to have a C section to help "keep their man". The typical "aim to please" Thai attitude where they always try to give what they think people want (often without asking) is probably a far bigger factor than assumed greed or planning for convenience. Ultimately, after the birth, how it was achieved becomes such a small factor as you start to parent your child. Perhaps a little more suuport for all women facing these choices and a little less judgement might be more constructive.

Chiang Mai would be ideal but we could have it sent from Bangkok too...

Where can I get organic baby food? Rim Ping supermarket used to have a U.S. USDA approved 100% organic baby food but it seems they are not stocking it anymore. Or maybe it's too popular?

If anyone knows, please let me know, thanks!

If it's important enough to give your baby organic, then maybe get a blender, some fresh Doi Kham veggies and spend a few minutes in the kitchen each day....? the nutritional value of the bottled/canned stuff is questionable, not to mention the cost!... probably why Rimping stopped stocking it And yes, I have done it that way here and it doesn't take long and we only get our little ones in our care for such a short time. Good luck and happy cooking.

My wife and 2 kids are still living in Thailand,Im in Hong Kong working.I get back to Thailand nearly every weekend to see them.My eldest,2.5yrs old has been going to an english speaking nursery for the last few months.He is speaking alot of thai these days but very little english.He seems to understand what I'm saying when I speak to him and does string the odd sentence together.I am a little concerned tho that his english is not as advanced as his Thai.This im sure is due to me not being at home during the week.Am I being to overly worried about his delvelopment ,or when he starts kindergarten will this become less and less of a problem.I will be speaking to his teacher about this on friday.Am I worrying to much as he's at such a young age? Will his english pick up? Any advice is appreciated

Our little girl (Thai father, farang Mum) spoke 95% Thai till we put her in a good bilingual nursery school when she turned 3 - I was worried then about her lack of English and had the same problem - she acknowledged me and clearly understood the English but always chose to answer in Thai. Since she's been in half days at the nursery school, the problem has reversed! She speaks English by choice (albeit with a cute Thai accent) and I'm worried about her Thai language development - all her writing is in English and she NEVER practices writing Thai unless I push her. Having spoken to the school recently after completing her first (not full) term, I'm convinced it comes down to the teachers and example - and what the teachers believe the kids can do. Somehow the Thai teachers think English is somehow better and focus on that - they over-emphasize the need to learn English and also don't believe 3 year old are ready to really write or read yet (how wrong they are in our case!). Also have to say that the standard of the western teachers at the nursery school is way higher than that of their Thai colleagues. Slowly I believe it will level out - as will your situation. He's not yet 3 so give him time. Talk to the school.... get more bi-lingual books and puzzles at home... get a maid/nanny who can speak English and make sure she does sometimes... regularly use both languages yourself and he'll work it out in time. I nearly always say things in both languages and that strategy is working well - she knows clearly what things are called and what they mean in both languages and I also tell her "this is how we say it in Thai/English". Good luck!

I went to nursery when I was about 4 1/2 - 5 years old if I remember correctly, that was in the UK. The trend these days seems to be to send the kids much earlier. My son is 2 years and 3 months old, and it has been suggested that it would be beneficial for him to attend now. I'm not really sure about this, as I feel he may be a little too young, and I worry he will loose out on his English skills. My wife does not speak English that well and we basically communicate with each other in Thai. I on the other hand speak exclusively to my son in English.

I visited a very good nursery today with lots of equipment, educational aids and many other facilities. The staff seemed to know what they were doing and two of them spoke English very well. They assured me that they do about 50% of the teaching and activities in English (not convinced about that) but they do have lots of DVD's such as Thomas the Tank Engine and Bob The Builder etc.

The argument is will my son develop faster if he is in a nursery environment mixing and learning from kids his age and slightly older, or will at his young age be better off remaining at home.

I'm a first time father so I would appreciate some advice from others who have been through this.

We put our little girl into a Bi-lingual Kindergarten in Chiang Mai 5 months ago when she was 3 years and 2 months old. She only goes for the mornings but the school recommended 5 1/2 days better than 3 full days for continuity. She's thriving and LOVES it but even now she is cranky and tired and ratty in the late afternoons (has NEVER been a napper - not even at 6 months) and we are putting her in again for next term at only 1/2 days. Also might add that most nursery schools do almost nothing after lunch except nap, snack and have a little play (which all the tired, grumpy kids don't get as much out of) and you get to pay some several thousand baht extra for this privilege. If you can manage the 8.30am drop off and a 12.30pm pick up, the half days are a great way to go till they're 4ish or more. I'd wait till your little guy is at least 3 and just spend lots of quality time with him in varying environments. Good luck...!

Hi there . . .

can anyone recommend a good doctor for my dad

who thinks he may have a chest infection, or a bad reaction to pollution.

Quick answers gratefully received . . .

Thanks

David

Hi David. I had a three year battle with lung/asthma/allergy after contracting a lung virus in Burma which was aggravated here in CM. After the 14,000 baht for a trip to Ram (didn't help) and the specialist at Lanna recommending I move closer to the hospital to be closer to the emergency room , I was a bit desperate and, at that time, slugging about 50 hits of ventolin a day to stay vertical. Our local hole-in-the-wall pharmacist in San Phi Sua recommended a Thai woman doctor who has a clinic open in the evenings from 5-8pm and who specialises in lungs, asthma and allergy (diplomas all over her wall - trained largely in Hong Kong and Singapore from what I can make out) and she speaks English. Not exactly a superb bed side technique but wow - 10 minute visit, a bag full of meds and instructions costing a total of 1,400 baht including the meds and I was better within 3 days! I had one f/u visit when I caught a cold and the thing flared again and am on a maintenance dose of only one puff a day (seretide) till the burning season is over. I feel great and would recommend her to anyone. PM me for details if you want/need.

Good luck!

My missus has made good friends with a girl across the road who is about 4 months pregnant. Her boyfriend is not computer savvy so I said I would ask about recent experiences of birth packages as many hospitals do not put them on the internet.

Primarily looking at Pattaya but perhaps Bangkok as well I would like to know what you paid, what the agreed price was and how you obtained the information. This last part is particularly important as I believe that a different price will be quoted if a westerner asks as opposed to a Thai asking for a presumed Thai-Thai baby.

Also please include any comments about additional costs and complications which affected your price.

Many thanks.

On our first visit to the (Thai woman) obstetrician at the hospital, we aksed and she spelled out all the possible costs for us in incredible detail. Obviously huge variation depending on what you "order". We ended up with a 26 hour natural labour in the natural birthing suite at Chiang Mai Ram #1 (top hospital here), a rushed mega emergency C section (impending uterine rupture), 6 days in a private suite with all meals and newspapers (husband and bubs rooming in), specialist genetic test for my dsugther (doctor insisted any baby born to a woman over 25 might have downs syndrome or worse) pediatric visits and lactation support - all up come to a bit over 42,000 baht but my Thai husband asked for a discount (shameless, aren't they?) and they happily let us ;ay only 37,000. That was just over 3 years ago. I know another western woman who had a relatively smooth natural delivery here at the Lanna hospital and only stayed in for 3 days and paid less than 10,000 baht.

Hope that helps...

Hello Ladies... Here to pick your wise brains!

Who knows about the steps involved and what documents and proof of income (and how much it has to be) are necessary for obtaining a Non Imm O Visa for a British woman marrying a Thai man?

Planning on marrying my boyf after 3+ years of being together on Koh Samui and trying to figure out what's best visa wise. A little dicky bird told me that our Thai husbands have to declare less than the 40,000 THB income that a Foreign man has to declare when marrying a Thai woman and applying for the Marriage visa?... Can anyone confirm this? I seem to remember it was around 25,000 THB... (A lot of Thais are baffled with my choice of husband as he only earns a minimum of 5,000 THB a month (more if he can get private tuition, he's a Muay Thai boxing instructor) as they typically believe that such etheral white creatures as ourselves should find the richest (chinese) Thai bloke and get together with him rather than marrying for love, but hey, its a little harder of course, but I think i'd find it a lot harder to live with someone I didn't love!!)

I'm currently in UK visiting family & working for a few months as haven't been 'home' in over 3 years but will return by April afterwhich we want to 'Thai' the Knot. Obviously I'm also looking for work (was previously well employed firstly teachin english for 6 months, then real estate for 2 years and finally writer/journalist for last 8 months) but this could take time and I'll bring sufficient funds to not have to worry about finding working quickly. Obviously once working again I would change to Non Imm B visa and get a work permit via my employer but prior to that I was thinking as we're getting married anyway, might be easier to get Non Imm O rather than mess around with the tourist visa.

As we all know rules now state we can only stay in Thailand for 3 months on tourist visa, I think I still know of people on Koh Samui who can 'work it' to allow you to stay longer, my little sister stayed for a whole year and never had any problems, but those things do make me nervous as it really can't be 100% kosher can it!?!

Anyway, been reading lots of posts in various topics, seems we have some very experienced Western women who've spent long periods of time in Thailand, and so I thought i'd ask for your advice in the matter.

I noticed some of you were able to bring your husbands back to the Uk for a while prior to returning to Thailand, one of you seems to live in Israel now. I thought I was having a hard time of it in Thailand after 3 years, but having returned to the UK now for the first time in a long while, I really could slap myself for all the complaining I did because life is just as hard here for different reasons and it just depends which 'hard' you want to take on I guess! I've decided that for the time being its just way too hard to even consider bringing my man back to UK, I would like him to make an informed decision on whether we'd like to move to UK and have been informed that tourist visa is out of the question, so we've decided to stay in Thailand for the time being.

All ur advice and tips and knowledge would be most welcomely received!

Thanks a lot,

Congratulations, Mystery! Relax - it's much easier than you think. Once we had our official marriage paper from the Amphur (and that bit was sooo easy - took about an hour in Koh Samui and that included the photos with all the officials) take it to the head of immigration where you are and ask them what to bring. It does seem to vary a bit. We had to supply a witness (in writing and in person) to prove that we were genuinely in love and that it was not a "marriage of convenience". Get that! - do you think they ask ageing westerners that question when the 67 year old man turns up with a 21 year old Thai bar girl?!? Our witness was interviewed separately from us. We also had to supply all the usual signed house papers, etc - no proof of income ever required for women here (at last we have a small win from living in a patriarchy - Thais assume the man will support you forever!). The interview took about two hours (mostly them reading and stamping and copying while we sat) - all we had to do was explain how we met, fell in love etc. The trickiest part was once they accepted the application and issued a temporary 30 day visa )no extra fee), I had to go back to the same immigration office every 30 days for a renewal of that temporary visa until the applicaiton was approved in BKK. It took 6 months and I was pregnant and we moved to Chiang Mai durig that time. So the 5th adn 5th month stamps ended up me having to fly from CM to Samui (I was 8 months pregnant the last time and had to lie about that just to get my ticket!). They were adamant that I couln't do the temporary visa anywhere else and if I pressed "pause" to have a baby the whole process went back to 0. So what I'm saying is you need to plan to stay put for 4-6 months while they get you official. After you get it, life becomes really much easier. Just turn up once a year with a copy of you marriage certificate and 1,700 baht - all you have to worry about is the 90 day address reporting which is also very easy (if you're organised) and free.

Please feel free to PM me about marriage to a Thai man anytime - we're 4 years married now and have a little girl of 3. Good luck - enjoy... and don't forget to have the slap up, full Thai Buddhist wedding thing - WONDERFUL and money can't buy memories of that (even the argument of where to slaughter the pig on the night before the ceremoney - and there's me half Jewish and a lapsed vegetarian).

I don't know why she is doing it but our 6 1/2 month old daughter has become much more clingy of late and will sometimes cry for long periods especially if one of her parents is missing. Sometimes she will continue after the three of us are back together. She isn't wanting for anything we can see but it is obviously distressing for us to see her like this.

I wondered if she was becoming more aware of who is there and at what times which may be true but we have shared parenting completely since birth so that there is no schedule for who will bath her at what time for instance. It certainly is not a lack of food or a dirty nappy which would be obvious.

I don't want her to become spoiled but I don't like to think of her in distress as she physically cries yteras as well as making crying noises so I am assuming she is really worried.

Any ideas as we have none ?

Some babies just need more contact, especially if they're not still being breastfed at this age... 6 1/2 months WAY TOO YOUNG to shut the door and let them cry themselves to sleep! What about using a baby sling around the house more? Good for your fitness and you can share the load - literally! Generally what I've read in this thread seems to be mostly western thinking and, let's face it, we haven't exactly done too well in producing happy well balanced people. It's simply not possible to "spoil" a child with too many cuddles at this age - now if you're still carrying her around all day at 18 months we can talk again.... Enjoy it - in 5 years when she's at school and starting to be shy about cuddles in front of her friends you'll be sorry you didn't just curl up in a chair with her more and gove her what she needs.

Good luck - PM me anytime if you need... my infinitley "spoiled" and over-cuddled little 3 year old (I had her in a sling till she was about 9 months old) is one of the most indepentdent kids at her bi-lingual kindergarten. And SOOO many Mums asked how I got back in to shape so quickly...

Can anyone tell me if Bang has a meaning, as in Bangkok, Banglamung, Bangsue etc.

My little 3 year old half-Thai daughter is at a bilingual pre-school here in Chiang Mai and "bang" is currently her favorite word. She holds out a soggy half eaten cookie and says "bang" - she means "share". Just another perspective....

Just wondering if anyone may have any helpful information or tips in regards to finding fair trade handicrafts, artwork, clothing etc. that I can export to North America. I would rather connect as closely to local artisans and ensure that they're being paid fair prices for their work. Hopefully if all goes well, it would be wonderful to establish long term business relationships. Lately it seems to be difficult to escape from the mass produced crap that most vendors sell at Sunday market. I think I'm just not looking in the right places. Any suggestions would be most appreciated!

Hi - a friend asked me to find your post on Thai Visa - he saw it and thought we should be talking to each other. I'd like to PM you but I'm a bit of a rookie at this and can't work out how at this late hour.... ooops - sorry. Perhaps if you PM me I can then reply and give you a website to look at?

The UK governement has today unveiled it's new Australian-style points system for those wishing to migrate to the UK for work purposes. They have also announced a consultation process to discuss the merits of requiring spouses who wish to settle in the UK to be able to speak English before even travelling to the UK.

A separate consultation, also published today seeks views on the introduction of an English language test before entry for people applying for a spouse visa to help to encourage successful integration.

You can bet your bottom dollar that if the government is consulting on this, the likelihood is it will come to pass. If so, expect some crony of the government to be given the contract to run recognised English language courses abroad, and also expect a marked downturn in the number of Thai spouse settlement visa applications.

Scouse.

--------------------------------------------------------------------

Britain tightens immigration requirements

LONDON: -- The British government Wednesday outlined details of a points-based system to "manage" immigration from outside the European Union (EU) under which unskilled workers would have little chance of entering Britain and spouses would have to pass an English language test.

Home Secretary Jacqui Smith said the proposals, devised along the lines of the Australian immigration system, were aimed at providing a "robust machinery" to ensure that only those migrants "meeting the needs of the UK will be allowed to enter and work."

Applicants would earn points for their skills and the "potential" they show for economic success.

The government would also in future "block the privilege of citizenship" to applicants with a criminal record and offer greater protection for people being pressurized into forced marriages.

Under the proposals, expected to come into force next year, the minimum age at which people can come to Britain for marriage will be raised from 18 to 21.

The five-tier immigration system is aimed at attracting highly trained and skilled workers, according to Britain's economic needs, while low-skills "will only be used if specific shortages are identified that cannot be filled from the UK or European labour force."

Last year, about 12,000 unskilled migrants from non-EU countries in Africa, America and Asia came to work in Britain.

However, the opposition Conservative Party, and anti-migration pressure groups, have said the new system will have little real effect as the vast majority of migrants coming to Britain were arrivals from new east European members of the EU.

The Conservatives, who have demanded an Australian-style upper annual limit on immigration, also maintain that the new system would not work without putting a cap on numbers.

--DPA 2007-12-05

Full Home Office press release.

The points test is the killer, not the English abilty or otherwise! Trust me - 25+ years living in Oz I have known many other migrants (I'm Dutch born myself) whose spouses, parents etc all failed the points test - nothing to do with speaking English and everything to do with only allowing "desirable" applicants. Sort of "well, we found our bit of paradise so we better pull up the drawbridge now before it gets too crowded here...". The discrimination in Oz is appalling and yes, ingrained in the system there. Sad to hear UK following their (and America's) lead. And thank the Buddha for the ever tolerant Thais.

I see this topic has come up in the past, but couldn't find any recommendations on where to get this done (in Bangkok)?

Any experiences? cost/comfort/etc?

The new TRIA Wellness Centre behind Piyavate Hospital - advertsied in last week's Bangkok Post. Tel: 02 660 2600. You might also try an Ayurvedic Centre - they very frequently offer colonic treatment as part fo the Panchakarma treatment. Good luck - personally found it an intense and uncomfortable experience but with a level of wellbeing afterwards that was 1000% worth it. Good luck...

tnx all f you.....u rely help me.....

i know abut Jerusalem restaurant,but i dont think they will like to shere with me how i can find this,,,,,,

mmm.....i need only the chick peas.....

y......i will go to rinpind today to ask....

Forget Rimping in this case - their chick peas are expensive and only in little packs (although for other things Rimping are great). Inside Wororot Market there is a wonderful Indian stall (ground floor in the covered bit where they sell all the teas, preserved foods, snacks etc - enter from the narrow soi/Chinese Temple side, walk straight down the centre aisle and they are in the last aisle on the right) - they sell all kinds of Indian things (have chick peas in bulk at a good price!) and they speak English and are very helpful. What more could you want? Buying olive oil from places like Rimping also expensive - you can buy it from Hong Huat on Mahidol Road in bulk for a much better price. But need to refrigerate as it goes rancid very quickly. Try rice bran oil instead - excellent light flavour, much better anti-oxidant levels, doesn't go rancid at all (like rice is designed to do well in the heat) and THAT Rimping have at an excellent price (80 baht a litre - the brand is King - usually up near the top shelf) - don't buy the cheaper orange looking rice bran oil that they sell for frying though - it has been heat treated (hence the colour) and not good for anything except deep frying. Good luck!

Specifically seeking parchment for things like diplomas but also looking for other styles including pre-perforated biz card stock.

Where to look?

B2S in Central often has an excellent range - sometimes a bit low around student exam time. DK Books on the moat also good, only they don't stock up often enough - if you are lucky and come after a buying spree, great.... otherwise not. Downstairs from Suriwong they have a good stationary shop on the basement/carpark level that carries a reasonable range. Also a great, quirky Thai shop on the moat (LH side) close to the Sri Phum corner and before the Chiang Phuak gate if you are driving up towards Doi Suthep (sorry but 4 years in Chiang Mai and the N,S,E,W thing still eludes me!) Macro also stockes a very good range.

The Buddist ceremony is not the same as a legal wedding in USA, it therefore cannot conflict with it, you should regard it as a statement of commitment, in my Buddist wedding I didn't say a thing or sign a thing so how can one have put myself in a position of conflict?

Your lady's family you say are upstanding and know the facts you can rest assured they would know if anything was amiss, and would not approve.

You seem to be in Thailand now so better to go by the Thai way in these matters.

The old Thai customs would already consider you married if you "co-habiting", let alone pregnant! - the Buddhist ceremony is just a formal way of seeking blessing and honoring the family. I was four months pregnant when we married in a very traditional (and very large - like the whole village came) Buddhist ceremony in Sukothai - if anything it was a bonus for me as the bride - everyone congratulated us and I got at least 371 belly rubs for good luck - the Thais love and honor fertility. Go with it... enjoy... but advise your partner to not get the trational garb made quite as tightly as usual - kneeling for 3 hours and unable to breathe not so great for the baby. Best of luck.

I'm not interested in this discussion on wether homeopathy works or not, but as the OP I'd be interested in the name of a good homeopath, could someone post this info please.

There's a superb practitioner here in Chiang Mai who distributes/supplies homeopathic remedies - anyone care to PM me and I'll pass on his name and contact informaiton. You might also contact the Tao Garden Resort here in Chiang Mai....