MEGALITHIC

As a martial art, TAE KWON DO is a complete joke. It shouldn't even be considered a martial art. Real martial arts, such as Muay Thai and Karate, use all limbs as weapons of attack and the participants at least try to belt each other with some kind of purpose. In TAE KWON DO all you've got is a couple of prancing ninnies trying to tap each other with kicks that wouldn't knock the skin off a rice pudding.

Photography and caving. check it out at: www.megaworldasia.com

Some people are a bit to quick to put the boot into others while disregarding their own situations. How many, coming on here, have spent millions of baht on properties that they don't own? Properties that are in their wives/girlfriends names and not theirs? And before you try and say that it's not the same, I'm sorry but it is. It's money that you will probably never see back.

Desperation can make men do stupid things and there's alot of desperate guys out there. They've foolishly sent a few thousand baht to some conniving little piece of fluff they met over the internet. Not too much harm done and hopefully they learn a lesson from it.

there's also a lot of [not so] desperate guys in a bunch of other countries out there who get married and lose in an instant half (often much more) of what they own to a wife after a divorce and then keep on paying and paying and paying...

summary: it doesn't take a Thai wife or Thai girlfriend to make a megalithic ignorant guy's life miserable. an American wife in certain states of the U.S. of A. (and some other countries too) will do a much better job than any Thai partner is capable of!

Well, well, you've taken me to task. No doubt I've hit a tender spot because chosen to personalise this. You could've kept it objective but you couldn't help yourself and took a snide little swipe at me and really, it's out of context. The thread is about Thai related subject matter but you've chosen to expand it to include the USA. Why? Is that where your from? Speaking from personal experience are you?

BTW, what's the deal with the klingon?

Good for the girls..There Not Stealing the Money or extorting cash..Weak men Give it to them Free...

Weak men..... ??

There are millions of different scenarios as to why guys may appear weak to another but genuine guys don't deserve to be rammed for perhaps looking for some happiness....??

When a guy is low in mood for whatever reason he may well clutch at someone who appears genuine and wants to be friends or more. Doesn't mean they should be stripped of cash out of utter deviousness...??

Well said.

Also:

Some people are a bit to quick to put the boot into others while disregarding their own situations. How many, coming on here, have spent millions of baht on properties that they don't own? Properties that are in their wives/girlfriends names and not theirs? And before you try and say that it's not the same, I'm sorry but it is. It's money that you will probably never see back.

Desperation can make men do stupid things and there's alot of desperate guys out there. They've foolishly sent a few thousand baht to some conniving little piece of fluff they met over the internet. Not too much harm done and hopefully they learn a lesson from it.

Show him this:

http://www.andrew-drummond.com/view-story.php?sid=503

Don't be so harsh. I liken it to a birth defect. The people you are referring to (notice I don't specify nationality) have a missing gene. It is called the "what if?" gene. i.e.:

What if there is a bus coming at us as I pass another bus at high speed on this blind corner?

What if a vehicle is coming down the lane I want to pull into without even looking?

and your example...

What if I spread jam on a piece of bread and then turn it on it's side or upside down?

Happens all around the world just seems to be an intense concentration of the defect in this general area...

Yeah, I cottoned onto that shortly after I arrived here. The idea that cause and effect are linked isn't a concept the average Thai has much of a grasp of. That's why it's bedlam out on the roads and why people just park up with a shopping trolley in the middle of the aisle at the supermarket and start chinwagging or trying to get on the skytrain before the others can get off or walking down the middle of the stairs at the BTS platform and banging out sms' etc.,etc., etc., etc., Once you've lived here for a while you develop tactics to work your way around the dumbness.

The idea of karma is nothing complicated. Deepak Chopra's definition of, what he calls, the spiritual law of Karma is simply this: any given point in a person's life, that they may find themselves in, is simply the result of the previous life choices they made leading up the that point. Good life choices point you in a good life situation. Poor choices will put you in poor life situation. It's got nothing to do with religion, or superstition, or any kind of mumbo jumbo. It's got alot to do with one's self control, or lack there of, and the intellect, or the mind. Yes it can be said that you reap what you so. Lack of self control - or discipline - usually due to emotion based decisions, or choices, invariably lead to negative outcomes. A simple example is that if one drinks too much alcohol you generally end up feeling like shit the next day. Simple cause and effect situation.

It got all F***ed up with these 3 words though, assumption, lived before baloney. Good choices can still end up bad ie I found £1000000000 on the floor in a bag and handed it in to the authorities, I never heard anything else from them no reward was given or choice 2 I kept it, invested it, and had a great life. is one of these choices good?

Would you also like to tell us that santa claus, the easter bunny and the tooth fairy also exist. Sorry but your example is nonsense. The reality is that if you found a bag with a sum of money like that in it then it wouldn't be too long before the wrong type of people started to show interest in you. Do you really think that the people who would misplace a sum of money like that would just idly sit by and forget about it? Better luck next time with the assumption and baloney. Perhaps you could also fit nonsense into your silly little quote as well.

The idea of karma is nothing complicated. Deepak Chopra's definition of, what he calls, the spiritual law of Karma is simply this: any given point in a person's life, that they may find themselves in, is simply the result of the previous life choices they made leading up the that point. Good life choices point you in a good life situation. Poor choices will put you in poor life situation. It's got nothing to do with religion, or superstition, or any kind of mumbo jumbo. It's got alot to do with one's self control, or lack there of, and the intellect, or the mind. Yes it can be said that you reap what you so. Lack of self control - or discipline - usually due to emotion based decisions, or choices, invariably lead to negative outcomes. A simple example is that if one drinks too much alcohol you generally end up feeling like shit the next day. Simple cause and effect situation.

so they needed money ( yeah from my wife and me ) for bus fares and food etc, i couldnt begrudge my wife from giving them this money after all what she had been through and didnt want to give her any more grief but if i had my way i would of told them to p*** off !!

They love this. Asking the Thai wife for some of the farangs money. My girlfriends friends try this crap all the time. That or can they borrow some money. It'll be paid back. It never is.

I find with Isaan people, any excuse for drinking is a valid one. Gambling is a national affliction.

Something about the nail on the head?

One would wonder how much partying/wasting money may have been done if the white walking ATM hadn't shown up?

I'd like to thank the OP though for sharing this experience with us. It just reinforces the idea that I'll never, as long as my two feet are planted on this planet, have a relationship/get married to some poor village girl from the North East of Thailand. Aside from the fact that they seem to have a completely different take on the concepts of integrity and honesty, than the average farang - and let's call a spade a spade here, why didn't his wife mention their needs for travelling expenses/food money prior to the OP leaving his home country? Answer is obvious, yes? - they also seem completely focused on satisfying their own selfish needs/desires at the expense of others.

I was out on walking street last night and it's never been more obvious. Farangs who are lonely, desperate, sex starved, delusional, walking around holding hands with some little dark skinned, diminutive girl from the North East, with looks on their faces as though they've found the love of their lives. I suppose beauty is in the eyes of the beholder but the only thing I see in the eyes of those girls is lies and deception. Sorry, but that's what it is. They're all looking for someone to foot the bill; to provide for them, and their families back in the village, so they can carry on with their own selfish agendas.

1. Thai women don't like Thai men

2. Thai women are not concerned about a man's age

3. Thai women aren't concerned how a guy looks

4. Thai women allow their husband to fool around

5. Thai women working as prostitutes in Thailand are sold into the industry by their family and are indentured slaves

6. A foreign man marrying a Thai woman has to pay a sin sot (dowry) and support her family forever

7. You pay for it with Thai women one way or the other

8. All Thai women are available for a price

9. Thai women don't have the same employment opportunities as men in Thailand

10. I know my Thai girlfriend / wife loves me because she told me

Not entirely true:

Marks out of 10

1.Probably not true (although they say so often)

2. Reasonably correct,statement.

3. I'm sure they would choose a good looking Guy,before the uglies......human nature prevails.

4. Some may do some don't ,but im sure any of them wouldn't like it,if they had a choice.

5. Perhaps some are, but certainly not all,or indeed the vast majority.

6. Usually,and for the most part,true, but not in every case.

7. For the most part true,but again not in every case.

8, Please anylise the term price,which excludes money.

9. Unless you are PM Elect!

10.Maybe she doe's,Maybe she doesn't,thats for you to decide,if she means it?

Reading the original 10 statements,one is inclined to easily agree with them Verbatum,

upon reflection,my answers agreeable or not are as above.

The title of the Stickman Article was: "The Ten Misconceptions Farangs Have Of Thai Woman." Or, more precisely, ten assumptions/viewpoints/opinions that foriegners have, regarding the way in which Thai woman think and their place in Thai society, which are actually incorrect.

Misconception #1: Thai woman don't like Thai men = Farangs think, or believe, that Thai woman don't like Thai men. Reality: Some thai women may not like Thai men but most do. Reason? They're Thai.

Misconception #2: Thai woman aren't concerned about a mans age = Farangs think, or believe, all Thai woman don't care about a mans age. Reality: Normal Thai woman are, bargirls/prostitutes aren't. Reason? Money is money no matter where it comes from.

Misconception #3: Thai woman aren't concerned how a guy looks = same as Misconception #2.

Misconception #4: Thai woman allow their husbands to fool around = Farangs think that all Thai woman don't mind if their husbands get a bit on the side. Reality: No Thai woman likes it but it probably occurs more with Thai husbands more than farang husbands. Particularly rich Thai husbands - they've usually got a mia noi tucked away somewhere. Thai wifes don't have any choice in this regard. It's tolerated as long as the Mia Luangs position isn't compromised.

Misconception #5: Thai women working as prostitutes in Thailand are sold into it by their families and are indentured slaves = Farangs think that all ladies working as prostitutes are enslaved and have no choice in the matter because they are there at the behest of their family. Reality: Maybe in the Thai on Thai prostitution industry but very rarely, if ever, in the Thai on farang prostution industry.

Misconception #6: A foriegn man marrying a Thai woman has to pay a sin sot (dowry) and support her family forever = Farangs think that they'll be up for a fee to marry a Thai lady and will have to provide ongoing financial support to her family. Reality: many get hoodwinked into this situation when marrying a bargirl/prostitute.

Misconception #7: You pay for it with Thai women one way or the other = Farangs think that sexual interaction with all Thai women will cost a certain amount of money. Reality: Prostitutes you pay directly, good girls cost you indirectly - dinners, movies, outings, parties etc.

Misconception #8: All Thai women are available for a price = Farangs think that getting a Thai women is simply a matter of handing over enough cash. Reality: Good girls - completely incorrect. Bargirls/prostitutes - probably right most of the time.

Misconception #9: Thai women don't have the same employment opportunities as men in Thailand = Farangs think that Thai women are a sub class and should be grateful that a farang has come along to help improve their lot. Reality: Lack of education and having the right connections reduces employment opportunities or gaining better paid, real jobs.

Misconception #10: I know my girlfriend loves me because she told me = Farangs believe it is true because she said so. Reality: there's alot of bloody naive farang out there.

1. Lack of knowledge/training when it comes to dealing with an emergency situation.

2. Indecision due to the consensus/group mentality mindset engendered in the culture.

3. No leadership thinking/problem solving ability due to the education system.

4. Loss of face scenario if the wrong action/decisions are taken.

I've seen it so many times and it's like a startled rabbit in the head lights syndrome. No one wants to make a move for fear of making the wrong move and then looking foolish.

I've seen situations where there's been two thais on motorbikes, on an otherwise empty road, and they've crashed into each other when a slight change in course would've avoided the accident. Indecision leading to a blank mind and the startled rabbit syndrome. All because they're not taught to be decisive or take the lead.

Here we go again.

I am from the been here a long time/cynics camp.

I can't advise you as to what you should, or shouldn't, do. Just some obseravations and things you may want to consider:

1. You are a first timer or a newbie. This is what happens to first timers or newbies. It's all rather an exotic and overwhelming experience. Once you've been here (the LOS) a few times it won't be so exotic and overwhelming.

2. Would you marry a prostitute back where you come from?

3. You're only 27, what's the rush to tie the knot? Stay single for a few more years and enjoy yourself in the LOS.

4. The only reason to enter into a long term relationship/marriage with any woman is to have kids. Are you ready for that? Because if you bring her over to the U.K., that's exactly what's going to happen.

5. Are you ready to provide financial assistence to the extended family you'll get with the girl?

6. Are you ready to pay a fee (sin sod) for marrying the girl?

7. Taking a young, poorly educated Thai girl with minimal life/work skills out of Thailand is never a good idea.

Yep, there you go. The notion that nothing is more important, to a Thai person, than a belly full of food has been officially endorsed by the PM Yingluck lol.

Kumera

Kina

Pauas

Green lipped mussels

Butter Fish

Flounder

Bluff oysters

Vogels bread

Hokey Pokey Ice cream

Buzz bars

Chocolate fish

Peanut slabs

Watties baked beans

Smoked rainbow trout

Large cold water crayfish

Milk in a bottle

I must've been steaming. I don't remember that many things from home.

SC

Brown sauce on my chips.

Sleet.

Trains with McEwans Export.

Just the food, otherwise very happy to be living in the "Land Of Smiles"

Kumera

Kina

Pauas

Green lipped mussels

Butter Fish

Flounder

Bluff oysters

Vogels bread

Hokey Pokey Ice cream

Buzz bars

Chocolate fish

Peanut slabs

Watties baked beans

Smoked rainbow trout

Large cold water crayfish

Milk in a bottle

What I find interesting is this:

1. Those residing in Thailand, including myself, basically think this birds a muppet and som nam na lol.

2. Those who don't reside in Thailand feel affronted/shocked/horrified at what she went through.

Say no more. Yawn.

I've been i Thailand for 18 years. I've tried Tailors in Phuket, Pattaya and Bangkok. I've been to, supposedly, the best Tailors up and down Sukhumvit; Narry's on Soi Eleven and one shop near the Dubliner that apparently made clothes for Steven Seagal. In all cases I found that there was something not quite right with their work. These days I just go to the 2nd floor (mens wear) of the dept store at the Emporium and buy what I need off the rack. I picked up a xxxl PC suit on special for 13000 baht; best fitting suit I've ever bought. They will always adjust the length of the trousers and will even iron your new shirts if you ask them. Indian Tailors? no thanks.

Translating UP 2 YOU:

In almost all cases where a farang is dealing with a Thai, UP 2 YOU is never actually "up to you." If you are haggling over a purchase, "up to you" is just an initiation point and nothing more. The Thai vendor/seller knows his/her lowest acceptable price and won't go lower than that so "up to you" is not "up to you," it's up to the vendor/seller. If a Thai lady tells you it's "up to you" be assured, once again, it's never up to you. A bar girl operates the same way as a vendor/seller does; she has her required price. If the punter offers a fee which is lower than what she wants she will quickly inform you of this. If you offer a fee which is higher than she expects, she will quickly agree on this. If your Thai wife, or girlfriend, says "up to you" be assured that it is never "up to you." It is a veiled threat that you will suffer the consequences if you decide that it's "up to you." Therefore, you can see, it's never UP 2 YOU.

It has been my experience that the average, ordinary citizen of this country (Thailand) is actually a rather generous and helpful type. As are the average, ordinary citizen of most countries I've been to. The pity is that average, ordinary citizens are often let down by those who are charged with resposibility of managing the affairs of the nations that the average, ordinary citizens reside in.

If Bangkok had opened their gates earlier this might have been prevented. But they did not want to take any risk and keep their feet dry. Now i can get out of control.

I said the same a while back too much water is coming you cant stop it you have to let it in. I have seen the water.. its still here rising a bit all the time. If one of your precious dams burst it will all come in.

We have felt it here, and i hope you wont get more then us at the depth we have it now its still do able.

How do you know? You are making a huge assumption here and with nothing but a gut feeling and some very sad wishful thinking to back it up. Frankly I doubt that it would have made any difference. The canals are peanuts compared to the flow of the river, and we are talking about draining central Thailand here.

True, but every little bit helps, but you don't seem to understand what is coming. Every little bit would have helped. You have as much hard knowledge as me and also a gut feeling.

I agree that the river is the main thing to drain. But all the land for miles left and right of the river is flooded. So opening the canals would have helped there.

Bangkok should have taken the risk earlier and are now feeling the results of not acting.

Weeks people are reporting no movement in the canals only now then its almost too late you guys started.

Actually, it's not that difficult to work out. A volume of water when moving from a higher gradient (upcountry) to a dispersion point (the ocean) will tend to move along the path of least resistence (the canals). The only difference between a small volume and a large volume will be it's spread (flood) while it's getting to it's dispersion point. So it stands to reason that if you block the flow of a volume of water it will back up, and therefore create a spread (flood), in the areas behind the blockage point. This is exactly what has happened. If it was allowed to flow unimpeded the spread (flood) would be less along all areas of it's path of travel. Now it's been blocked up to a point where it's a flash flood situation and when the blockage point bursts (or the gates are opened) the inundation will be far worse than it would have been had the canals been left fully open all the time. There would still have been flooding but not as severe as we are about to see.

This:

Go down to Singapore for a day or two; approx 10000 baht round trip flight.

Prices are better and no problems with authenticity.

Problem solved.

No it's not. What is it about westerners trying to apply a logic that's based on generosity, integrity and decency to a situation where you perceive, wrongly, that the logic of the person, that's shown you complete and utter disrespect for the above listed qualities, in some way matches yours? It doesn't. The very fact that she's done what she's done obviates the opposite. Don't you guys get it? You are dealing with a hunter/gatherer mindset. I'm sorry if that upsets some people on here but that's what it is; a survival at all costs, no matter what it takes mindset. What she's really thinking is this; he is weak, his heart is soft and I've got away with what I've done to embarass him. I'll put up with him because I'm still being afforded a very nice life style. She was boffing some other guy in a long ongoing situation. Ask yourself this; do you think she actually respects you? All this talk about love and making up is twaddle. If there's no respect or integrity then there's no love. How can there be? You are now just going through the motions for the sake of the kids and you should be congratulated and respected for that. However you are, mistakenly, rewarding her for her deceit. You are trying to paper over the cracks with trinkets and baubels; expensive holidays, gifts and dinners. But what you are still seeing, every time you look at her, is a person that has no respect for you and what you are feeling inside, sorry to say, is low self esteem because of this. Your way of dealing with this is through alcohol. Ask youself this; how would a Thai man have dealt with this situation? Well, we know what the answer to that is and it's not very nice to think about is it? This situation won't improve and do you know why? Because all you are doing is trying to please someone else at your own expense. Life is short my friend; how long will you go on being miserable just to make someone else happy?

We're talking about sex.

With your western logic you probably assume sex, love and making up goes hand in hand and sometimes it does but in this case there's nothing wrong with the OP having a romp with somebody he used to love just for the sake of sex. It might sound shallow but it beats having to pay for it and old jeans never wear out.

You might be talking about sex but I certainly wasn't. What I was talking about is the guys self respect and not weakening his position. And, no, I don't think that love and sex go hand in hand; that is a rather naive concept. I also believe that most people who think they are in love are only in love with the idea of being love. What he's doing now is exactly the right thing to do; having a romp with her will undermine his position and allow her to think that she hasn't really done anything wrong (This is not about the fact that she was bonking some other guy while he was overseas working, it's about the lack of loyalty and respect for what he was doing for her to improve her life). So, what do you do? Allow someone to spit in your face at your hard earned effort? Because that's what it is if you allow your emotions to take control of the situation; you will weaken and give in. As soon as you start having sex with a woman she starts getting the idea that you owe her something because she's allowed you access to her property (body). It's the age old psychological war of the sexes at work; you don't get something for nothing. That's what a relationship is all about; a man wants a stable situation with a regular partner with sex on tap and a woman wants security ie; food, clothing and shelter. That's how it's been for centuries and nothing's changed. And if any man in this country is naive enough to think that it's anything else other than this then you better make sure you've got a very healthy bank account. Yes, needforepeed is in a tough situation and it's not going to get any easier for him but, at the end of the day, it's the path he's chosen for himself. If he plans to continue on that path I think he'd be much better off sitting down with her and giving it to her straight between the eyes so there's no grey areas: 1. He's only staying on for the childrens benefit. 2. He can forgive her for what she's done but he's not interested in restarting a real relationship with her. 3. If he wants sex he'll go outside to get it. 4. If she wants sex she can go and see her boyfriend.

Life is as normal besides that there is no sex involved anymore and I have to say that we don't have any difficulties with this as for this needs I just pay for it, I made a mistake in this to get a Girlfriend for a few months but that did not work out.

Why is there no sex involved anymore?

Maybe I misunderstand but the way I read it she had a fling and you had a fling so if you don't have anymore difficulties together why not start a fling with each other?

Good question,

We not sleeping in the bed anymore, not that that is needed to have sex but just to explain the situation at the moment. For me it just feels strange to make any approach.

Can't give you a better answer as i don't know myself.

Maybe get the George Micheal cd out of the drawer even as the candles, strawberries and champagne and give it a try .

Its a bit strange, but give it a try. Its the best idea I've seen here.

No it's not. What is it about westerners trying to apply a logic that's based on generosity, integrity and decency to a situation where you perceive, wrongly, that the logic of the person, that's shown you complete and utter disrespect for the above listed qualities, in some way matches yours? It doesn't. The very fact that she's done what she's done obviates the opposite. Don't you guys get it? You are dealing with a hunter/gatherer mindset. I'm sorry if that upsets some people on here but that's what it is; a survival at all costs, no matter what it takes mindset. What she's really thinking is this; he is weak, his heart is soft and I've got away with what I've done to embarass him. I'll put up with him because I'm still being afforded a very nice life style. She was boffing some other guy in a long ongoing situation. Ask yourself this; do you think she actually respects you? All this talk about love and making up is twaddle. If there's no respect or integrity then there's no love. How can there be? You are now just going through the motions for the sake of the kids and you should be congratulated and respected for that. However you are, mistakenly, rewarding her for her deceit. You are trying to paper over the cracks with trinkets and baubels; expensive holidays, gifts and dinners. But what you are still seeing, every time you look at her, is a person that has no respect for you and what you are feeling inside, sorry to say, is low self esteem because of this. Your way of dealing with this is through alcohol. Ask youself this; how would a Thai man have dealt with this situation? Well, we know what the answer to that is and it's not very nice to think about is it? This situation won't improve and do you know why? Because all you are doing is trying to please someone else at your own expense. Life is short my friend; how long will you go on being miserable just to make someone else happy?

And you think this never happens in Farangland? You think that foreigners never have good ideas that are ignored by the local population? If you intend to live in a country that doesn't share the common presumptions that you were brought up with then it's best if you leave those presumptions where they belong and be grateful that you're being given the opportunity to discover how other people view the world that we live in.

Yes, and this becomes even more pronounced when the foreigner places himself in a small village/community where the average inhabitant has barely 6 years education. Where the average inhabitant has little knowledge of the world beyond their village borders. Where the high point each day, for the average inhabitant, is the discussion of what's in the next meal. What makes it even more astounding is that these average inhabitants actually believe that the good ideas that the foriegner might come up with, from time to time, are hardly worth listening to because he doesn't come from their village and doesn't understand how things work. Makes you wonder why any foriegner would want to waste his time sharing his good ideas with those very average inhabitants of the village.

This:

1. You're a sucker for punishment.

2. It's not going to change.

3. If you don't like it; leave.

4. If don't want to leave; stop making suggestions or giving your opinions - your opinions and suggestions don't matter, or count, because everyone in the villages knows that they are smarter than the farang. The farang is only there to provide money. Don't waste your time discussing with them what you are going to do; just do it. And when they ask you why you didn't discuss something with them, just say there's no point because they know everything already lol.