Dr Hiram P. Klonky

I'm sure lots of other long time residents have the regular phone calls & visits from the farang selling financial services, financial products etc. I get at least 2 to 3 calls a month.

Yes indeedy. These sorts really irritate me with their breathless rushed delivery in order to impart all their blether before being cut off. My technique is to say that Yes, I am interested, ask them to wait a moment then put the phone on my desk. Not only are they left hanging on while paying for the call, but they are also unable to pester any other sort while waiting for me. Just a thought!

Well actually I've been here 8.5 years, since you ask. I was a Dean of a UK University Business School, probably still am, judging by the paychecks, but I am of course a US citizen. Been thinking about starting afresh in Kanchanaburi, business, that sort of thing. Health spa, you know. Just a thought!

Oh dear. I can categorically state that it was not by any means my intention to generate all this illiterate and intemperate banter. Makes one wonder why one bothers. Just a thought!

You subscribers seem to know each other so well! How refreshing that you can bandy innuendo and quasi-insults with such abandon. Ah me, what it must be to be so popular. Just a thought!

When you live "in the upcountry" as I, for one, do then one cannot help but remark when encountering these farang how enormous they are! Seeing graceful and compact Thai people all the time preludes a shock upon meeting these gigantic expats - one forgets that one too may be a tad on the large size. So it can't be too hard to count 'em. Just a thought!

I'm afraid that I am not altogether familiar with Beyonce Knowles. He - or she - has such an unusual name though, just fraught with significance. Hinting at The Other (Beyond) yet rhyming with Ponce and Nonce. How simply tantalising! I wonder if this person lives in Bangkok? Just a thought!

Everyone in Thailand gets hit with a "mai mee" on a regular basis. What's your favorite?

My persoanl one is Burger King at Don Muang airport a few years back. You got it - "mai mee burger". That's right, no burgers of any description at all! I suppose it was an early morning flight though. Just a thought!

Has anyone ever noticed that there are so many holidays in December but very few in other parts of the year? Couldn't someone even them out a bit? Just a thought!

Is it just me, or is it getting cooler these days? Especially in the morning. Oh, and the evening too. Just a thought!

Give Trink a job? According to L.M. Boyd, you must be barking!

There's a word for it: Euthentrinksia - putting duffers with a soapbox for dangerous views out to pasture

Sign up Trink? / I think nay / Better go / For someone au fait

Burma Shave 1904

Would anybody like any toast?

I'd recommend using the strange duty free shops located in the arrivals hall by luggage pickup. Much cheaper for booze 'n' fags than Britain!

Trink fired? According to L.M. Boyd, nobody gives a hoot

There's a word for it : Trinkomania - hanging onto geriatric and dangerous views despite overwhelming evidence,

So long Bernard / booze and drink / Nana plaza / "Bye Bye Tlink"

Burma Shave 1874