HYENA

Racism is alive and well in the USA (Baltimore riots, and other issues well known to the world). On the skytrain, a lady asked my wife to get out of her seat, because of how she looked. I didn't fully comprehend what she said, 'till she was already off (or I would have pushed my limited free speech rights over the line in LOS). I have been in several restaurants who turned away blacks and dark skinned locals. They cannot do that in most civilized countries (even Japan, I suspect they can't do that, but I'm not certain). I think it's more the overt racism that I see that bothered me in LOS. In the USA, it's more subtle, police pull over my coworkers with amazing frequency. Most people like my wife in the USA, and accept her (except for this cutthroat money hunger to send abroad issue she's got that's destroying us).

Thanks, I really do appreciate it...I wish I had better solutions, but I must sleep in the bed I made for myself.

Know any kids looking for a little extra B? Seems like I'm not the only one, given I saw a similar concern posted recently. Too bad there's no accurate Isaan programs out there!

(Hey, thanks mods for moving this to the appropriate forum!)

Northeast, it's Papaya salad. Maybe not so much for the Thais, but the Isaan fall back on that dish for menses, breakups, a good cry and chat with friends, death, birth, etc. When my wife is feeling down, this always cheers her up. It's her only comfort food.

We were due visit LOS in 2 months, but my wife went on a shopping spree & funneling $ abroad even after promising to check w/me first. Been harming our family, given I'm no Dr., supporting 5 on my meager salary. 2 kids-mine, 3yr old ours. She feels it's her duty to funnel $ abroad, (not even to mother, but nieces and remote relatives). I recently saw receipts & posts about sunglasses, cash, hats, watches. I intercepted some amphetamine "weight loss pills" last year, keeping them to turn in just in case. "Everyone's doing it" doesn't cut it when diverting prescription amphetamines is illegal both countries, selling to friends here. I told her 1 more and I'm turning her in (but she continued, I suspect; just can't translate). I've got a bad egg; "we can't afford it" doesn't register (my own fault, I thought it would be of mutual benefit in life, but I've never figured on Buddhist principles of ego, status, wealth appearance, etc.) We used to be a nice match, but the $ issue won't die. Ever.

We invited 2 extra family members to go, but given many requests to take our daughter & keep her in LOS is making me decide it's not a good idea. I trusted her enough to try (with family) in June, but I've got pages of posts I can't translate.

Since after cutting off the ATM ability on the debit, I think she's been funneling groceries & fuel for $. She hasn't seen her family in 5yrs, I thought it would be nice, but I'm unable to trust she won't abduct. I'd saved up, borrowing to get there, telling her now's the time to be careful about money (I'll be in school the next 3yrs), but she destroyed what trust I had. LOS has it backwards. Birthday & wedding, guest of honor treats everyone else, buying presents & handing out $. She figures we're going all the way there, let's buy everyone a nice watch, glasses and hats to screw the family budget as much as possible (initiating conversations, taking orders for 9 from what I saw; one box was sent unbeknownst to me). They're dirt poor, but luxury items has me upset (not even rice money).

I don't know for sure. The Thai to English translations I pick up words like money pit, eggagerate, slow incriments (funneling)? pond, village, Lao, Huckabee and other interesting translations. I just wish I could find some kid who wanted a few extra baht to help each other out. She won't admit to anything while looking right at me (not aware I can read some posts), changing stories by the minute. I cut up the ATM card, now she wants a divorce (I guess I was good for two things; daughter and $ for ego feeding status, opposite of the nice Buddhist influence I had hoped). I'm sure I'll get flamed for making a bad decision, sleep in the bed I made for myself, etc. I'm just realizing a divorce would be a horrible mess and even a therapist had us agreeing to check before sending $ abroad, but thai lies always get around any agreements, don't they?

I've struggled with this for a long while, and the only thing I can think of, is if I can find some student who doesn't mind making a little extra money to translate a few posts.

The police are upset because they recognize another mafia (than themselves) extorting their victims in Chatuchak...So they ask the newspaper to put out an article to see what other government entities are in on the action (lest they arrest some detective or politician and spoil the game). Stinking corruption up to their necks!

The marriage is over if they're not living together and it's known he was a dud. Having said that, he may be a normal thai guy (or she wouldn't have married him) doing what all the rest do and she's got higher aspirations (via marriage) for herself.

I can say by experience to be careful of these types. My wife threw her husband out for "being lazy" and she's super-super lazy (they're from the same genepool, who was I fooling)!!!

Many Thai marriages aren't on paper and any farang setting foot is a status raiser for the family (and regardless of what she says, they WILL expect money to be sent and money will get "lost"; I hear too many stories of families bilking farang for as much as possible). Farang failure to send money is also a reason for divorce so regardless of what's said, the husband is supposed to send her mom money all the time.

Tell him if they ever marry (don't be stupid, listen to me) draw up a prenupital agreement. If you're too late, do a post nuptual then you'll know how real the intentions are. I did a post nupital ;-) For me, my wife and extended family have no problem with lying; it's in their culture. It's when the lying becomes about important things that I start thinking about how we can get 1 round trip and one 1-way ticket to Thailand for a "vacation." I'm currently planning that vacation soon.

My wife's got a good heart when times are good but as their culture (it's well written) dictates, friends are fair weather friends and certain wives are fair weather wives. She's got a great work ethic (if it came down to starvation); otherwise she can't be bothered to learn all the written words in the house (on the stove, wash machine; simple stuff I told her last year she needed to learn). She's wholly unmotivated and lacks the ability to work hard (study) -this seems to be ingrained because every few months she'll ask for an easy way out (like paying someone off-that doesn't work here).

Yes, I read warnings and went through so now I'm on the other side providing warnings to others who will make the same mistakes others and me have made.

Finally, if you don't listen to anything else (I'm now a firm believer of this): Poor people make poor decisions. There's choices passed up through the generations and they worked hard to get where they are. Intelligence and work ethic will be reflected in their living status.

So you are talking up a storm about a shady guy that has already tried to kill you with a shovel. Sounds like a good plan making such a guy lose face all over town.

Good luck on your future "robery gone wrong with unknown assailant"......

Do you really think that Thai builders such as these will hear about the "face loss" on English language internet sites? No. They barely know how to use a TV remote control. They probably wouldn't ever click that they're losing business, especially from foreigners, as a result of their actions. Good on the OP for giving out a warning, and if this forum can't have discussions on scammers and other providers of poor service providers which are matters of personal opinion, then I hope the OP can point us to the website where he can convey the bare details that some of us may be very very appreciative of.

People will lose money and families will lose money from the farang bilking machine they have created if there was any way to warn others or track them down. They protect this culture by threat of death or violence.

The truth is this forum is Thai (for all intents and purposes) and follows Thai rules. Farangs can be shamed (look at all the posts and pics and links of newspaper articles of shamed farangs who have not been convicted in Thailand) but anyone who is genetically Thai cannot be shamed here or in the papers; especially if that individual or company has taken out an ad (I learned this here). It's just a harsh reality of xenophobic culture and business.

Read how many farang auditors come up dead or missing...or anyone discovering a scam or ripoff to bilk a farang--they end up dead eventually to protect their well oiled farang bilking machine. I see nothing Thai that is excluded.

She should be able to use her Thai license - but not 100% sure. In the U.S., the International License is no good.

That is not true. My wife uses her international DL from Thailand in the USA. My insurance covers it. The trick is finding an insurance company that will cover it..

OP is already suspicious or paranoid. My advice is.... RUN

Prenupital agreements will hold. I suggest you do that and check laws on both shores then go with your decision.

I did a post nuptial in the US; had it drawn up by a Thai lawyer and it's valid on both shores. He did it (translation and review) for about a hundred dollars. Ignore the nasty comments; some forums aren't very friendly so you'll have to wade through until you see a helpful reply.

old news; Vanderdick has been in Thailand for years now

Samoa is all the way in the Pacific and far removed by land mass from Thailand

Interesting to watch the coming weeks to see the next earthquake (seems to be a correlation) on the other side of the plate from there (just like Japan and California seem exchange earthquake volleys).

http://www.maplandia.com/samoa/

kewl!

I wanna climb a tree and cut it down (or it'll fall on my house)...need some gecko help!

http://www.pagopago.com/blog/john/2009/09/29/tsunami

pictures just in from nearby

Yet another attempt by the Thai authorities to make themselves look like nincompoops to the rest of the world.

never mind about the alleged crimes - lets go off on a red herring legal technicality.

they don't look like nincompoops, they are.

a very reactionary govt with no foresight and no intuition into what's better for the people, what the right thing to do is, etc.

In a country where cash is paid directly to any government official from the bottom police all the way up, one can never expect any real legitimacy or sound decision making capacity anywhere. Expect to see like insane decisions that make no sense to us but make sense to someone's pocket. Personal gain is the game...screw everyone else!

Idiots; alcohol and tobacco ARE drugs! Impossible to make a party drug free.

Tobacco is a sched 1-2 drug come to think of it...alcohol is a sched 2-3 and marijuana is a sched 4-5. Don't understand why the number one and two killers are legal and some of the less harmful one's are not. Very strange.

yet again, farang is responsible for negatively influencing thais....maybe one will develop a habit (like they'd never get a habit at home)

Just a final point to the ones arguing that government intervention is always being BS.

Can you please explain how Canada, a country with a bigger government and more heavily regulated economy, is pretty much walking through this financial crisis completely untouched?

Not one Canadian bank has asked for money from the government.

that's why Canada is a better country in some respects...far lower prison for profit scheme, too

All governments make the same mistake.

Stimulus packages are BS and will never be a healthy solution.

real infrastructure projects are better than subsidsing purchases or tax reductions.

the world trading landscape is changing and Thailand is in a geographical position to benefit.

They are looking at Rail through to China , if they linked it to a port on the Indian ocean and added oil/gas pipelines they could become a very important link in China's rise as an economic giant.

China IS an economic giant. THe US gave them eminent domain for the massive money they're lending. THey're bailing out the world and are getting some serious interest in return.

Motives? Maybe the next guy will start sending money like the other 4 in line.

Preg tests can be found in a matter of days. They also have the "plan B" or "morning after" pill for very little money over the counter. That's what mine did when she wasn't fully on the pill and we couldn't wait (twice in 18 months).

Women from many countries do this. String 10 guys along and see if 2 start paying...and the third guy pays for an abortion ...

The holding cell at Ratchathewa police station must be bursting at the seams.

Not necessarily. Does 1000 arrests mean 1000 individuals? Perhaps they have just been arresting the same 30 people every day for the last month - its much easier and more profitable that way :-)

Anyway - at least for the moment it is having an effect. I came through on Monday and the only hassle I got was from the AOT Limo counter who are still hijacking dazed tourists just past customs.

How many times have Politicians etc made statement that were not factual? How many times have any "crackdowns" been enforced? I hear/read this but honestly I wonder if it's just not more "spin." Many realize the more often a lie is stated the more seemingly real it becomes. Let's see the consequences of said actions please.

Oh like the free perks for tourists back when that out of control group closed the airport? (do that in my country and get mowed down for closing an airport)...it's a chaotic mess with no rule of law whatsoever.

It is the most ineffective and inefficient reactionary policy i've seen...and that's with the past 3 governments and constitutions!

It's all just posturing and looking good with absolutely noting to back it...no rule of law. They like it this way or they'd have changed it loooooong ago. Everyone is warm and comfy with whatever payoffs they're getting.

Hardly indecent; Iranian girls are hot!

BTW...You are dating yourself with the terms "dude" and 'bro". Hardly anyone under the age of 50, either black or white uses either of those two terms to refer to black people any more.

Dude and bro are definitely here to stay; especially in the pot smoking subculture. "Dude you better get a dell" commercial this decade (until he got caught smoking pot). I just heard two high school aged kids using both those words last week.

If you re-read my post you will see that I was referring to "dude" and "bro" being used as titles for black people not for kids or dope smokers.

Point taken, agreed. I was just reading too fast, farang!

"Nigga" can be used towards people of any race, it's a copula similar to "dude" or "bro" or "man".

I'm not buying this statement. These days any white person who calls a black man "Nigga" is almost always going to be treated as if he called him the other word and is most likely going to end up in a fight or worse. This is particularly true if you live in a city with a large black population like, Chicago, Oakland or New Orleans.

BTW...You are dating yourself with the terms "dude" and 'bro". Hardly anyone under the age of 50, either black or white uses either of those two terms to refer to black people any more. They were used quite frequenty however in the old 60's television show "Mod Squad" which was generally considered completely phony and uncool by just about everyone of any race who ever saw it.

Dude and bro are definitely here to stay; especially in the pot smoking subculture. "Dude you better get a dell" commercial this decade (until he got caught smoking pot). I just heard two high school aged kids using both those words last week.

I do agree this "Nigga" word is just an excuse for one race to excuse its exclusive use while all other races are barred from using it. Say the word "Nigga" and die if you're not from African American heritage. Both words sound different when we say it but when the black subculture that doesn't pronounce its R's (it's a nationwide subculture accent regardless of residence no other race carries in the US). The words are really Nigge* and Nigge* then they say "It's a different word" thereby prohibiting others without the accent from saying it while pronouncing nigge* and nigga identically. It's original use and intent was Nigge*.

Most find it highly offensive but the rap/gansta/gangster subculture got it into mainstream black american use only with the intent to offend. Spelling it with an accent as Nigga is poor job of rationalizing a highly charged and racist word at the same time they take offense when anyone else uses it regardless if they say it with or without the R, you'll still die if you say it and you're not black.

Deciding to spell it with an accent to rationalize it's exclsive use to black Americans since that subculture still carries its own accent regardless of residence....still doesn't make it right.

People who like me can call me anything they want to. That is why blacks can call each other the N word but won't accept it if spoken by a caucasian.

i think as foreigners should start using the term on each other like american blacks

i.e.

yo my main farang! whas up?

one more:

he's got more excuses than a farang on his way to jail

Sigh...

Rant on.

Forgive me for the threadjack ...

But Look People.

And I'm speaking specifically to those White people out there, especially from America.

First off, in the interest of full discloser, I am An African American Man. ( yes, there is *one * here on Thai Visa.. )

Second - I've NEVER called another African American, Caribbean American, or African that word.

Despite what you may have heard , we African Americans are not a monolithic culture - Now while we share many experiences, we all do not all think and do the same thing.

There seems to be a popular misconception out there, especially amongst American white people, that black people in American run around all day calling each other the "N" word so to speak.

If I had a baht for every time I've seen this on not just this forum, but others out there in internet land , I'd probably be able to take the Skytrain from On Nut to Mo Chit.

And back...

Ok, listen up, the word that SOME blacks call each other ( which is spoken and spelt as "Nigga" by the way) is nuanced and spelled differently from the other insidious epithet that you know ( and some love... )

Unfortunately, many black people have been using variations of that ignorant word since white folks created it. Some black folks used it in the beginning as away to keep other blacks in their place ( that is, when whites weren't doing it ), but then it evolved into an new definition and it's meaning changed from the original epithet.

Some Young black guys who are ( or want to pretend that they are ) inner city "Thugs" who do use that word are in fact saying "nigga", not "N-Word ".

I personally think it's kind of dumb, but "nigga" just doesn't have the same meaning as "N-Word ".

"Nigga" can be used towards people of any race, it's a copula similar to "dude" or "bro" or "man".

But to the vast majority of ( American ) white people , seemingly and willfully outside of the sphere of African American culture, they do not / could not have the cultural knowledge or touchstone to be able to understand the different nuances and difference between the words.

Ergo Barry and Ianforbes posts above.

Interestingly enough, lot of young white guys who are into African American culture call each other that now, and I've even seen Hispanic and Asian guys use it too - in certain areas and situations though.

And it can be used toward black people by Hispanic and Asians, but for whites, only if they know they black guy(s) really well, and understands African American culture,and how and when it's used. ( even then, Non-black nonwhites tend to have more leeway to use it, than whites for the obvious reasons..)

While I don't use that derivation of the "N" word , I do know what is meant by the people who do.

( And not for this gansta rap nonsense, it might have gone away entirely... )

And that is the difference.

But what I can't stand is when white and even some non-black people who bludgeon *all* black people in general simply because some black people use it.

So I while do admit there is a subset ( and I mean subset ) of African Americans that do use this term, like I said, mostly young men in the "inner city" ( and some pretending to be from the inner city ) into the "Thug Life" / "Gangsta" life , the vast majority us us do not.

If you don't believe me, just go and find any African American person get to know them, and once you do, simply just *ask* them ( And Yes, while I admit there aren't too many of us in the Kingdom, we do exist in Thailand. ).

( Of course, the question has to come up naturally in a conversation.. )

I hope that is clears this up with this "culture lesson".

End rant.

Sorry, but had to be done

Now As for the "Farang" thing ( to get back on topic ) and whether or not it is bad, This is an old debate, I must have seen at least five versions of this in this forum though the years....The fact of the matter is.. Sometimes it depends on te situation and the person addressing you by that name. Also, the word itself ( just like languages themselves ) is changing, even amongst Thais. ( And I've even been called "ฝรั่งดำ" believe it or not, by more than one Thai, which is pretty funny in itself... )

Words and their meanings do not remain eternally static.

I'm quite sure that even within twenty years the word "Farang", like many names used to described people in many other languages, will change and become somewhat different than it's meaning that is currently embraced here....

I disagree. Nigga and Nigg* sound the same with the African American subculture (gangsta/gangster) accent. Have the same Nigga calling individual say both N words and listen-they'll be identical. Same with gangsta and gangster...sound the same, different spelling (only recently) but the intent is to say gangster mimicked in spelling by the accent.

It's the sound of the same word. Both of those words sound identical. Nigga and Nigge* are no different. I do not believe it's appropriate for any N word to be used mainstream but this is a way of expression and definitely freedom of speech. Now ask someone who's calling their homey a nigga and ask them to immediately say the other N word; they'll sound identical as gangsta and gangster spoken since R's in that subculture are not pronounced...it's the same spoken word but a technicality spells it different now getting others to believe it's a different word. I don't call people honka....the word originated the same and excuses made a different spelling to justify and rationalize its use in response to overwhelming voiced offense. If you look at the history of this usage; it's always been the same word until this past decade someone decided to spell it to the accent to continue to rationalize its use.

I prefer farang at least Thais can pronounce this correctly and I understand when someone is addressing me or talking about me!

Now my name can come as Lick Hard or lychee for short..... never mind my last name which is always pronounced Bits but is not Bits in farangland..

So farang suits me fine as i never get called by my real name.....

How about these names do you think they prefer their Thai name or farang?

Stan = Satan

Chris = Klit

1. I'm changing my name to Stan Chris. I'd love to be a satan klit.

When i was new to Thailand, I have to be honest and tell you it offended me, too. My guess is you're from the US and (if that's the case) we've been over educated on racial/ethnic sensitivity so going abroad and hearing people state the obvious (because it's their style) "..hey, you know that fat guy foreigner I'm talking about.." or that really black man or that cripple who works in the store

or...that farang (generic term just like Asian). I did tell my wife I'm no more falang than you are Yippon or China. She got it but also said it was just a generic term for wide eyed honkeys. It bugged me for a while and after learning the true Thai heart it's a way of talking about you when they don't really know you. Now she refers to me as faeng, I refer to her as mia but when she's talking about westerners, it's falang. I'd say the closest interpretation would be falang=westerner

One more note; we've been a priveleged color people for a loooong time. Rarely have we encountered prejudice but had we been born with dark skin, life would be different and not as easy. Nearly all the places in the world have this skin phobia where lighter is prettier (except some white countries are preferring a bit of a "beautiful tan" now but the tan doesn't show in corporate and management yet). I admit it hurt in my ignorance and I have encountered prejudice in Asia and Nicaragua. I have to remember these are different countries, some where the government reinforces the attitude. Not all countries want a melting pot; they prefer the "pure blood" ignoring the ancient immigrations into their country (not a single person on earth is "pure" anything) but still they want to preserve their look and keep separate from our toxic influences. You have to admit, our influences around the world are not all positive (we even got China hooked on Opium; surprised they don't still hate us).

So...my suggestion as stated several times earlier would be to reduce your sensitivity and learn the culture and deeply get to know at least one or two Thais. You'll be quite surprised to find these people mean no harm (taking into consideration their caste layover system from ancient India) and state the obvious when our culture has been trained to be "politically correct. This is a heirarchial society; something our brains cannot grasp in practice yet and no we're not at the top of it.

If you're fat, they'll tell you you're fat. If you're old, they'll tell you so. If you made a bad call, someone will point that out. If you ask a question, you may get no response at all. It's just a diff culture. Really I think it's healthier stating the obvious than dancing and prancing around the subject when everyone knows what the person intends to say. I have no tolerance for truly recist words but this is not one and remember true racism is just pure ignorance. Rarely being discrimitated against, honkey, whitey is fine with me and so is farang but not buffalokee! I've lived far too sheltered of a life compared to all other races who have been discriminated against. It's about time we get on the receiving end if there's any left. Give em a break; the expression is an early word out of more ignorance....just saying "foreigner" and the Indians they call "guest" but rember ancient Thailand was basically SE India wayyy back; I guess they became "guests" towards the end. We look different, there's no race intergration attempts and they like it that way. They're not us and all Thais are not created equal, neither are we (in their pretty almond shaped eyes)!

It's just a prejudiced society where all races and slight race variations believe they are superior to one another. Come to think of it, we're no different. Who are we to say our way is the right way? How do we know their thinking is not superior and we need to "get with the program"? That's likely how they see it.

You'll know you've assimilated enough to get over the "farang" word when you're able to sit down and eat a dish of Tom Yam/Tom macoom. There must be something in it because that's all it took for me!