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GrahamF
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Posts posted by GrahamF
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Heavy drinkers and alcoholics like you to drink with them so they can keep kidding themselves that they don't have a problem. Look, everyone else around here is drinking as much/as fast as I am, therefore I don't have a problem. Conversely, when you stop drinking around them, it exposes themselves to themselves.
Keep doing what you're doing. Sometimes, your not drinking might give someone the impetus to take a look at their drinking and push them to get some help.
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Thanks for the replies. I see some of the people that have answered did not read the post fully, as Cornerstone rejected my request. See the last sentence. Also AA or any 12 step anything, is not what I am after, as I did not mention alcohol or drug addiction in the initial post, but that seems to be taken for granted? Thanks, and I do appreciate the pointers towards the western counselors as I don't think the Asian's would get it. I have no desire to be put on any crazy med's.
I will post later with an answer, if I am able to secure personal one on one counseling.
You do know that you're posting in the "I drink too much" forum, don't you? If you post here, most people are going to presume you have a problem with drugs or alcohol.
Best of luck to you.
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Happy Oktoberfest. Prost!!
Don't worry AA and other programs will be there for you when you're ready to get sober!
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When I was in detox the docs gave me Librium (sp), which stopped all the withdrawal symptoms. You should only be on Librium for a couple of days as it can be addictive. I was also given an anti-anxiety drug and Thiamine for a couple of days.
I wish you both the best!
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AA people get so defensive!
Not really, just tiring when people who really don't understand the program of AA bash and pontificate on it. There is so much to say, but the best advice I can give you Tominbkk is to stick to your program and not worry so much about how others are staying sober. If you don't you might be drinking before you know it and you might end up going down that "rabbit hole."
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Not about the hotel, but I went to a pretty decent Big Book meeting on Soi 6 (suk) when I was in BKK last year. It might have been on Wednesdays.
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Most chapters make you recite the Lord's Prayer at the end. So yeah, I guess.
AA doesn't make you do anything, especially recite the lords prayer. Some meetings do end with the lords prayer, the majority of the meetings I have attended have not ended with it.
Have you ever been to AA?
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Oooh look....It's a radfem troll.
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Why does everyone get hung on on whether or not they are an alcoholic. It is just a word that is used to describe problem drinking. It is not like pregnancy where you either are or are not but is a term to designate a medical condition that some drinkers have
If you are a binge drinker then you are an alcoholic period, full stop. Normal people don't binge drink, normal people can walk away from a half empty glass at a bar or cafe, normal people don't have to get drunk every time they drink
If you don't want to call yourself an alcoholic then that is your preference but it is obvious to me that you feel you have a drinking problem or you would not be posting in an open forum
There is no cure for alcoholism, only the awareness that certain people cannot control their drinking and it will only get worse as time goes by. So far you have taken the first step, now it is up to you to choose whether or not your are going to quit entirely or continue and watch and see if all those things that you say are not happening to you now, start happening to you in the future.
Unfortunately I can guarantee you that they will since the other insidious part of alcoholism is that it is a progressive disease with the final outcome being death
Why would he be an alcoholic?Because he feel comfortable and relaxed when he stay at a bar? or because he enjoys the taste of an alcoholic drink now and then and let himself go.
I'm sure there must be a similar word then for people who enjoy dinner buffets.
I'm almost similar to the OP. For the first 14 years of my stay in Thailand i went out every night 7 days a week till 7-8 am. Spending 1500 - 2000 each night on drinks only.
For the past 5 years i have been out maybe 10 times in total and buy a bottle of what I like every 2 - 3 weeks or so, but when I have the bottle at home it will be emptied in 2 - 3 nights maximum, because I enjoy the taste and relaxation, so don't restrict myself. When the bottle is empty I may buy a next one in another 2 - 3 weeks. I can't remember I've been drinking alcohol before 7pm as long as I stay here.
Am I also an alcoholic ? I don't think so .
You don't mention whether or not you can stop drinking once you've started drinking alcohol. If you can't stop drinking, then yes, you are probably an alcoholic.
I mentioned that I don't see a reason to stop something I enjoy. But When I don't have a drink for weeks in kine, I also don't have any craving for one.
If that is your definition of an addict, then how do you call someone who goes to a restaurant and stays there for hours ordering delicious foods, until he's full.
For me an alcoholic is someone who can't go a few days without alcohol, and drinks to drink, not someone who enjoys what he's drinking.
"I mentioned that I don't see a reason to stop something I enjoy. But When I don't have a drink for weeks in kine, I also don't have any craving for one."
You still don't tell us whether you can stop. if you wish, once you've started drinking. Doing something in excess, even though you may enjoy it, may still be bad for you.
"If that is your definition of an addict, then how do you call someone who goes to a restaurant and stays there for hours ordering delicious foods, until he's full."
Someone who can stop when full is not an addict. An addict would keep on eating either at the restaurant or at home. Again, it's about not being able to stop once started.
"For me an alcoholic is someone who can't go a few days without alcohol, and drinks to drink, not someone who enjoys what he's drinking."
I binge drank for years, before my boozing escalated, and I could go for weeks and even a month or two without drinking. When I drank, I couldn't stop. I can tell you that I enjoyed what I drank, I enjoyed a good wine or a single malt scotch.
If you can't stop drinking once you start, you might be an alcoholic.
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Why does everyone get hung on on whether or not they are an alcoholic. It is just a word that is used to describe problem drinking. It is not like pregnancy where you either are or are not but is a term to designate a medical condition that some drinkers have
If you are a binge drinker then you are an alcoholic period, full stop. Normal people don't binge drink, normal people can walk away from a half empty glass at a bar or cafe, normal people don't have to get drunk every time they drink
If you don't want to call yourself an alcoholic then that is your preference but it is obvious to me that you feel you have a drinking problem or you would not be posting in an open forum
There is no cure for alcoholism, only the awareness that certain people cannot control their drinking and it will only get worse as time goes by. So far you have taken the first step, now it is up to you to choose whether or not your are going to quit entirely or continue and watch and see if all those things that you say are not happening to you now, start happening to you in the future.
Unfortunately I can guarantee you that they will since the other insidious part of alcoholism is that it is a progressive disease with the final outcome being death
Why would he be an alcoholic?Because he feel comfortable and relaxed when he stay at a bar? or because he enjoys the taste of an alcoholic drink now and then and let himself go.
I'm sure there must be a similar word then for people who enjoy dinner buffets.
I'm almost similar to the OP. For the first 14 years of my stay in Thailand i went out every night 7 days a week till 7-8 am. Spending 1500 - 2000 each night on drinks only.
For the past 5 years i have been out maybe 10 times in total and buy a bottle of what I like every 2 - 3 weeks or so, but when I have the bottle at home it will be emptied in 2 - 3 nights maximum, because I enjoy the taste and relaxation, so don't restrict myself. When the bottle is empty I may buy a next one in another 2 - 3 weeks. I can't remember I've been drinking alcohol before 7pm as long as I stay here.
Am I also an alcoholic ? I don't think so .
You don't mention whether or not you can stop drinking once you've started drinking alcohol. If you can't stop drinking, then yes, you are probably an alcoholic.
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Perhaps the responsibilities of home keep you from drinking.
"Problem is, I can not stop after the first beer, want the second, up to 5-7 beers and after that the stronger stuff."
Not being able to stop, is indicative of a problem. I binge drank for many years, eventually it escalated into everyday drinking.
I won't pronounce you an alcoholic, I will say that you've got the potential to get into some serious drinking problems. Be careful!
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Perhaps this isn't the thread to be discussing AA traditions.
How are you doing Blue?
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I don't want to waste anyone's time on here. I'm drinking again... Trying to limit it, but difficult. I'm ok though thank you for your concern.
Sent from my iPhone using Thaivisa Connect Thailand
Sorry to hear that. You should re-read your first post. Some people say that "no drink is wasted." Maybe it's going to take some more drinking for you to really want to stop.
You're not wasting anyone's time. Keep posting an let us know how your doing.
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Nothing wrong with good steak dipped in a no of home made sauce.
My mother was great cook and she always told me that it was shame to put sauce on a good steak. It was probably the wisest piece of advice that she ever gave me.
Your mom was a very wise lady!
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rollrunna, on 08 Jan 2014 - 05:27, said:
Sudden change of diet.... try moderation and perhaps buy extra toilet tissues when u purchase the Leo.... try thinking...
You still use tissue???? Yuk
Actually i took my Thai wife to australia and she can not understand the farang and how stupid they really are,
when she got back to Thailand she told all her friends that the high-so tissue napkins in the Thai restaurants,
you know the ones in the round containers that sit on the tables, well you will not believe it, but the farang
hang the high-so napkins in their toilets and wipe their arse with them..... crazy ting tong farangs.
Everybody knows these are table napkins in Thailand.........more money than sense stupid farangs
It seems that your wife doesn't think highly of Farangs. I wonder what she thinks of you? That might give you the sh**s.
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Crikey I was drinking 30+ drinks a night during the peak of my career. Approaching 50 I can still drink the occasional 20 and I ain't even the best drinker out of my friends. I don't really get headaches.
Drinking the most made me the "worst" drinker of all my friends. Do you see people bragging about being the best smoker or heroin user? I never got headaches too. When drinking two large bottles of whisky plus a few Changs, there was no time for that.
Most of the people that I know, myself included, who refer to their drinking as a career are alcoholics.
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And there are many more that are alcoholics trying to control their drinking.
Actually, in AA they tell you if you're not sure, belly-up to the next bar, and come back when you are. At least that's what a friend told me.
Although I appreciate what AA can do for some people, its philosophy (as exemplified in the saying above) seems really snarky and off-putting to me. I find Rational Recovery, SMART Recovery, and other secular programs (like Allen Carr's book) free of this 'holier than thou' attitude that oozes from of all of those cute AA catchphrases (they must all be in a book that people memorize, there are so many of them and people are always chanting them like mantras).
I'm glad that something has worked for you. AA is working for me and I am far from religious. Bashing another program of recovery, in my opinion, is dangerous and unhelpful. There may be people reading this thread who might be put off from AA and in fact AA might be the thing to help them. Please be careful what you post, you might be unknowingly harming someone.
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Failed again... Where next, I don't know!
Sent from my iPhone using Thaivisa Connect Thailand
When you were going to AA, how often did you go to meetings and did you get a sponsor and start working the steps or did you just go to meetings?
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I'd be a little more convinced it you hadn't posted a link to a special reduced rate of only $1200 for the course.
Is that how much it is?! I was thinking of buying it!! Not now......BUT...
he has put a lot of free stuff on UTube....and if you register on his site he sends you a free
7 day course which gives you a good idea what it's all about
Sorry, your first post comes off as an advertisement and your second seems almost scripted.
Are you an alcoholic or addict? Has EFT "cured" you or anyone that you personally know?
A simple, straightforward answer would be appreciated.
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You are just too young to stop drinking! Enjoy life to the fullest. There will be time when you don't want drink, don't rush it.
Do you also tell kids with Juvenile Diabetes that they don't need to take insulin because they're too young and that there will be time enough for that later?
You're not funny or helpful and you may in fact be helping someone to kill themselves with booze. The alcoholic will grasp at anything to keep drinking.
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Stop drinking..Lose that gut if you don't have one yet it will come..Get healthy..Drinking slips up on you as a problem..Most are in denial yet never stop..Set your mind right and Stop..You will never regret it...
You won't regret it if you give it up, but why give it up entirely? I love a drink but can stop after a few glasses of wine or a couple of beers. I see no point in waking up feeling wretched, or worse, not sleeping because I've drunk too much. And then there is the financial angle. I told my daughter many years ago that if she quit smoking, she'd have enough money for ten days in Bali after a year. When I found that cigarettes were $15 a pack, that became three weeks in Europe after a year!!
I'd rather spend an hour in the gym than an hour drinking, and in spite of my advancing years, or what some may say, women still love, and prefer, a well toned guy, or dare I say it, with muscles.
"I love a drink but can stop after a few glasses of wine or a couple of beers." Some people, myself included, can't stop after just a few.
You're right about the money, I can't tell you how much money I've saved from not having to buy booze and I can't imagine how much the medical bills I've avoided would have cost!
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Responsible drinking is an option if one is not an alcoholic.Drink responsibly
From my personal experience, alcoholics generally don't live their lives responsibility or moderately.
Alcoholism, much like cancer or diabetes is a disease according to medical science. It is extremely difficult to manage by "responsible" or "moderate" drinking, much as trying to be a "responsible" or "moderate" diabetic.
Hospitals, mental institutions, prisons and graveyards are full of people who thought and lived otherwise.
One Day at a Time and Good Luck My Friend.
'According to medical science' - can you cite your sources? To compare alcoholism to cancer is disgusting.
The 'disease' reasoning is a convenient way for the weak minded in this pathetic victim culture to excuse their own lack of self discipline. Cancer victims don't bring it upon themselves - alcoholics do.
It is entirely possible to be a moderate drinker - the majority of people who drink alcohol would fall into this category. When it stops being fun it's probably time to stop drinking.
Sent from my iPhone using Thaivisa Connect Thailand mobile app
You are absolutely rite.
Mind you there are a lot of dead people who would dispute the point with you, The American Medical Association says Alcoholism is a disease. How about comparing it to diarrhea would that make you feel better. You fail to realize you are playing with peoples lives here.
How ever one does it if they are drinking to much for them it is time to quit. Any way they can. Many find that it requires a little change in their way of living and attitude.
If the OP is alcoholic I would strongly advise him to stay away from people like you. You are riding on a high horse spouting off things you know nothing about with there life hanging in the balance. As I said many could not do it alone and sought out help in different type groups including Mental health groups. There are some who drank very heavy and for a long time and just stopped as we have heard there testimony here already. Not all can just stop.
Just out of curiosity I would be interested in what a knowledgeable person such as your self calls a moderate drinker. Can they occasionally get drunk is that moderation. If they get drunk would it be a once a week or once a month? Are all people allowed the same amount of drinks no matter what their sex or weight is.
If they never get drunk why would they quit?
It seems that every time a thread is started by someone trying to get sober, that a number of people chime in with, "just quit" "use your willpower" "your weak minded" etc, etc. I'm going to take a guess that at least half of those posters don't have a problem with alcohol and as I have witnessed many times, people that don't have a problem with booze, just don't get it.
Certainly, there are people who are having problems with alcohol who can just put it down and stop drinking and there are probably a lot more who need some sort of help to quit. What I find really disturbing about the "willpower crowd," beyond the fact that a lot of them have no idea about alcoholism, is that they are not open to the fact that someone may need outside help. We need to understand that different people will need different methods of getting sober and we need to realize that if we don't encourage people to get help that we may be helping them into an early grave.
OP, best of luck to you and I really hope that you are willing to explore different methods of getting sober. Don't give up!
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It might be possible that the alcohol is exacerbating some other condition that you might be unaware of as yet. Just a thought, and I would suggest getting checked out by a doctor. Couldn't hurt and I would lay off the alcohol until you do, you haven't harmed yourself or anyone else yet, but that might happen.
I hope everything turn out ok for you!
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Best of luck to you Blue!
Find something that will help you figure out why you drink, AA, therapy, whatever, just get some help doing it. In my case AA has been working for me.
I've always felt that alcohol was not my problem, it was the solution to my problems! I had to figure out how to deal with my problems in a different way, rather than use booze.
As an aside, and some incentive, I have met quite a few Thai and Central American women who are quite impressed and pleased that I don't drink. There are also a few who knew me when I drank that are quite pleased as well!
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Why do heavy drinkers insist you drink along?
in I Drink Too Much Forum
Posted
I've heard that "I'm just being sociable" excuse from a lot of drunks when they are trying to get you to drink more. It's a load of crap.
On a side note, if you are worried about being sociable, you might want to think about shouting a round or two yourself, and not waiting around for someone else to buy.