RapidMethod

So how did it go?

Hello Tonray, please could you provide details about the source of your information for

 

"As a requirement for this approval letter, the Thai employer who is supporting the visa application must employ four Thai employees for each foreigner, however in our experience it is possible to negotiate and the number may be reduced to 1-2 Thai employees. "

 

and: 

 

"a) Regular work permit The employing company must employ four (4) Thai employees for each work permit. Also here, in the first year of business after the registration of a new company, the Labor Department may allow a ratio of only 1-2 Thai employees per work permit, i.e. per foreigner working in the company."

 

I've been in touch with the Labor Department and no-one there seems to know anything about this. Maybe it's possible at certain regional offices...?

 

Could you PM me or post a reply here.

Thanks.

Intensive Six Day Learn to Read Thai Bootcamp

BANGKOK

 

With the Rapid Method it doesn't take long and it doesn't require much effort. So there is no excuse for continuing to be illiterate and unable to speak & understand Thai!

 

December 12-17, Mon-Sat, 8am-5pm (cost ฿38,000)

January-March, three weekends a month apart, Sat-Sun, 8am-5pm (cost ฿41,000)

Please click here for more details about the course and to book online

 

Richard Krause talks about the course ("If you're serious about Thai then just do the course")

 

1. You don't need to be able to speak or understand Thai, let alone read or write, in Thailand because you can get by well enough in English. You can enjoy a wonderful life just mixing with other 'farang' and if you have a bilingual wife/girlfriend (husband/boyfriend) or secretary then he/she can deal with the day-to-day chores or any problems with bureaucracy. And it's relatively easy to pick up enough 'Taxi Thai' to buy stuff at the market or get around by taxi.

 

2. It's really difficult, arduous and time-consuming to attend Thai language classes. You'll get nowhere and will probably have given up by now anyway. The conventional way of teaching Thai is usually confusing and complicated and requires mammoth memorization skills.

 

3. Thai isn't an international or commercial language. So if you don't plan on living here long-term, learning Thai is not going to be much advantage to you back home or anywhere in the 'Western' world.

 

So why bother!?

 

If you can speak Thai but not read yet - or if you want to learn to speak & understand Thai - and are very busy or lazy about studying then this course is for you.

 

The Rapid Method for learning Thai is NOT for you if you:

• don't care about Thai and spend most of your time with other expats or bilingual Thais
• have plenty of time, love studying languages and prefer a more 'proper', academic approach
• are sensitive about sexual obscenities and are politically correct

 

1. If you plan on making Thailand your home (whether permanently or just for the winter months) then you are more vulnerable to expensive scams and mistakes, are restricted in your dealings with Thai people, officials and businesses, and are almost wholly dependent on trustworthy bilingual partners or agents. 

 

2. If you work or have a business of your own then you need to have blind trust in your Thai partners and staff. If you are dealing with large orders or projects or large amounts of money then your business and investments are at risk.

 

3. If you have children then you will not be able to understand what they are saying to their mother (usually) and friends, family and neighbors.

 

4. If you are married or in a long-term relationship then you will never really fully understand how your partner thinks and will be open to a minefield of misunderstandings and potential recriminations.

 

5. If you are single (or a philanderer!) then the amount of available women/men/ladyboys is exponentially larger if you can speak Thai - most (incredibly attractive) Thais don't or won't speak English; they will only feel comfortable dating you if you can communicate with them in Thai.

 

6. Thais are much more likely to respect you and take you seriously if you can speak (and especially read) Thai. We look down on immigrants in our own country who can't or won't speak our language, especially if they've been living there for a while, and are working full-time and have a family. In fact, we despise them and would be quite happy to kick them out. Would you expect the Thai people to think any differently about us!?

 

7. It's a LOT more fun to live in Thailand if you can speak and read Thai!

• You can swan around anywhere, especially the non-Tourist areas and villages upcountry, and chat to local people.
• You can get to know what Thai people really think about us in particular and life in Thailand in general.
• You can deal with officials and the police and doctors and nurses directly, not to mention suppliers, staff, builders, students, etc. etc.
• You can have a deeper connection with your romantic partner (and children).
• And you are much more likely to have better access to your market in Thailand and suppliers and customers.

 

What is the Rapid Method?

 

The Rapid Method is a journey that you travel along just a little bit every day for a year or two or three (first year for basic conversation, second year to be fluent, third year for business & commerce).

 

It's a Yellow Brick Road, starting with learning to read and accurately pronounce Thai words and tones.

 

It's a process using bizarre pictures and mnemonics, stories and songs like:

ดูเธอทำ (a hit reggae song)

คันหู (a sexy song that's not about an itchy ear!)

เห็นหมีหนูไหม (an obscene song that's not about a bear!)

 

The main emphasis is on memory. There's no point in learning anything if you can't immediately remember it. The Rapid Method focuses on ways to remember vocabulary and develop a kind of 'muscle memory' so that you eventually speak automatically, without having to think about it. And in order to understand what people are saying (quickly and indistinctly) you need to train your ear to 'hear' what you are reading and understanding.

 

It's all about conversation. No writing. No literary or flowery or poetic vocabulary. Learning to read is (merely) a vehicle for being able to pick up vocabulary from your surroundings, know how to speak accurately and clearly with the correct tones, and a mental/visual foundation for everything else.

 

It's less-is-more. Spend just a few minutes a day (15-20 minutes if you can) every day on just what you need to know. Ignore everything else.

 

It's high-tech. Your smartphone is your friend. The material is available at any time convenient to you, whenever you have the inclination to devote a few minutes, especially during dead time when you're waiting for something or when indulging in some kind of treat like a coffee or glass of wine...

 

It's entertaining. The Rapid Method has been designed to be fun do to in its own right. Learning Thai happens as a kind of side effect of something that you would already enjoy doing just for the hell of it!

 

What others have said about the workshop

 

Please visit Learn Thai Online for more details and to learn the top 30 letters (and read hundreds of very simple Thai words) in a few hours.

Ludicrous assertion on so many levels.

(1) Young Thai children can't read, but can speak Thai perfectly well.

(2) Immigrants from neighbouring countries can speak Thai, but can neither read nor write.

(3) The Thai script isn't the only way of representing Thai. For example, Mary Haas's system is actually far better than Thai script at representing the language, with absolutely no ambiguities. Plus it's much easier to learn.

That said, learning to read/write Thai is a good thing. However, a six day course isn't going to get you anywhere past "I can decode the words very slowly, and even then I don't know how they're pronounced". It takes many, many months of practice to achieve anything like proficiency because (i) the rules (particularly tone rules) are complex, (ii) there are so many irregularities.

[Moderator, could you make this a sticky please]

It is absolutely essential to pronounce the vowel sounds accurately in order to be understood.

Thankfully, the vowel sounds in Thai are very consistent, they do not change depending on your region, as in English. There are regional dialects in Thailand, of course, but if you pronounce the vowels in particular the ‘standard’ (middle-country) way then you will be universally understood.

There are only nine vowel shapes in Thai. All the vowels are made up of short (cut-off) or long versions of these sounds, or of two vowel sounds pronounced in sequence (“dipthongs”).

Trying to learn to speak Thai using a phonetic transliteration scheme is doomed to failure. You will very likely end up mangling and mispronouncing Thai. Learn at least to recognize the Thai vowels and make sure to watch the following youtube videos and practice the shapes until they become a subconscious muscle memory...

Part 1 Exaggerated 'farang' version and explanations

Part 2 The normal Thai way of pronouncing the vowels

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Stop!

Are you still illiterate? You can't really speak clearly and accurately unless you can read. The quickest and most effective way to learn to speak and understand Thai is through reading because you are then also able to absorb Thai continuously from your environment - just by reading the menus and the signs...

If you cannot read Thai or are still struggling to read and you would like to speak Thai distinctly with naturally-sounding tones then this course is for you. By the end of the six days, you will be able to read Thai - albeit slowly and without necessarily understanding what you are reading - and pronounce each word accurately with the correct tones.

What if you just want to learn to speak and understand Thai? Although it seems counter-intuitive, the most effective way to do this is to speak-through-reading. See the details below about the follow-on conversational courses.

You'll absorb Thai from your environment if you can read these signs.

If you are already fluent in Thai then please tell your "illiterate" farang friends to come and get it done, once and for all! ช่วยแนะนำเพื่อนฝรั่งผู้ไม่รู้หนังสือมาเรียนด้วยครับ

When August 22-27, Monday to Saturday, 8am-5pm

Where Chiang Mai

Cost ฿35,000 (฿38,000 for Bangkok courses)

Includes

- delicious buffet lunches and all-day refreshments,
- comprehensive workbook,
- lifetime access to the online "video workshop" course,

- the "Anki" spaced-repetition flashcard files comprising the 500-odd words from the workshop (takes a month to memorize).

And me with my whips and chains to make sure you can read Thai by the end of the week!

What is the Rapid Method?

It's an integrated system based on a less-is-more philosophy that incorporates mnemonics, pictures, risqué songs (where possible!) and stories for easy memorization, as well as a structure for developing good speaking habits, building up your vocabulary and training your ear - that fits into your busy/lazy lifestyle. Instead of studying mountains of academic or "linguistic" material, the minimalist Rapid Method focuses on a small body of essential & relevant vocabulary, sentence patterns and colloquial idioms that you master by studying gradually over time for no more than 10-15 minutes per day, plus two one-hour sessions per week with a teacher (online or face-to-face).

If you can't make it to the workshop then you can follow the Video Workshop Series and learn to read Thai by yourself online.

Workshop Schedule

Monday is about learning all the basic consonants (which you should already know pretty well already from the preparation); and understanding exactly how to pronounce them. We introduce the first few vowels and practice reading simple words.

Tuesday is about learning all the (simple) vowels. There are a lot of them. And practicing how to pronounce them. The vowels are the hardest thing to pronounce because you have to get the shape of your mouth just right.

On Wednesday, we introduce the tones, learn the less common consonants and the more complicated (‘combination’) vowels. Now we can start to read real Thai – and we practice reading a few songs, such as:

We complete the tones on Thursday, add in a few more not-so-common consonants and start to practice reading whole sentences without spaces. (In Thai, we don’t need spaces!) By now, you will remember nearly all the letters because of the stories and reading practicing that we do every day.

Friday and Saturday are mostly consolidation and more practice, and I throw in the obscure consonants as a kind of free bonus. These letters are not so important, but they do appear in about a hundred common words – so you do need to know them. But if you forget then you can quickly look them up by yourself when you come across them in a word.

Click here for more details and to book online

Follow-on Conversational Program

After you can read, I recommend you focus on speaking-through-reading; and the course I recommend is Everyday Thai for Beginners. I’ve adapted it so that it can be used interactively as a self-study system, along with a Thai tutor who you meet for an hour’s session twice a week online via Skype. It’s a 30 week course (and only in Thai script). After about 4-5 months, you will be able to speak and understand basic everyday Thai very well.

This Everyday Thai course comes with another Anki file, consisting of 1100 words to learn. If you work through these flashcards about 5 minutes every day then you will know all these words within six months.

The Everyday Thai course isn’t terribly exciting, but it’s very logical and well-designed. It takes you step by step through each situation you will find yourself in when you speak to Thai people, starting with getting to know people and their families, their interests and hobbies and moving on to buying things, ordering food at a restaurant or at the market and getting around in a bus, train or taxi.

Another great advantage of the Everyday Thai course is that you will be practicing to read Thai all the time, so that by the time you finish the course, you will be able to read Thai fluently! (Well, as fluently as a 12-year-old, say… You need to read a few books and build up your vocabulary even more to become really fluent.)

To be able to really speak fluently and understand what people are saying, I then recommend studying a romance novel called Sydney Remember. (You can study any romance novel, but I’ve turned this one into an interactive audiobook, with notes and an accompanying Anki file.) It’s a lovely story about a Thai girl from Bangkok going to live with her cousin in Sydney. It’s our story in reverse. She sorts out her visa, gets a job at a Thai restaurant owned by a Japanese man, makes friends, etc. Nothing much actually happens in the story, but it’s written in a plain, colloquial style with lots of everyday slang; and it’s about everyday life. So after you’ve read and understand the book, you can join in the conversations with your Thai friends. It takes about a year to complete this course (two one-hour sessions per week with your Thai teacher; and 5-10 minutes per day working on Anki and practising speaking standard phrases and sentences out loud to develop your mouth muscles).

What did the participants say?

Listen to what the previous participants said after they finished the course.
[Click on the image above or watch the .]
More video interviews can be found on the workshop page.

Youtube and email comments

If you're serious about learning Thai then just do the course. Richard Krause

I am trying to learn Thai language but I was scared to attempt to read it. This course has inspired me to try now with your mnemonic based approach. Thank you so much. Graham Jones

I have been living in Thailand for just over two years now and I have tried all sorts of methods to learn to speak and read Thai. I've tried books, CDs, classes etc, but nothing has helped. By watching your videos I have learned a whole lot more Thai than any of the above mentioned. Richard Grant

I instantly learned how to read thai (in time for my first time visit in Thailand). I didn't think it would be this easy! Marié Park

For me, it was realizing that it's not Thai that is difficult but the way it is taught that matters. Brent Warren

This is extraordinarily creative and hilarious Tyler P

Congratulations on the fabulous material. All languages should be taught this way. I started on the YouTube videos the night before and was astonished the next morning I had retained all the consonants covered after less than three hours study. This has never happened before with any subject I have studied. Lhinn Paadmottara

I was blown away by the fact I learnt the 25 consonants in the lesson in two viewings, when I've been trying for a couple of weeks to do learn the Thai letters without a great deal of success. Alex Cannon

Hey Gary! Brilliant, as usual I've still retained 99% of my reading skills from way back then, believe it or not. Dmitri Eroshenko

Something that really impresses me about your online workshop is that not only is it entertaining and fun - but it is also well structured so that you really learn something! A rare combination indeed. Annette Larke

It was like taking down the shutters from the windows and being able to see out for the first time. Colette Baily

I asked my Thai teacher today if she thought it possible for someone with no prior knowledge to learn to read Thai in two days. She said no. When I read some Thai to her she said, "It's a miracle!" Simon Gunn, Managing Director, Channah Thailand

I learnt and retained more information [in one day] than I had in the previous three months by conventional teaching methods. Mark Pirie, Triumph Motorcycles

I've lived here for 14 years and couldn't read or understand my own children. Now I'm making real progress. Tom Atkins, Bangkok

This course was fantastic – exactly what I needed in my quest to learn to read Thai. I must admit I was a little skeptical at first, but the course exceeded my expectations by miles. We were really reading Thai script by the end of the week and I am continuing to learn more every day with the online resources and follow on suggestions from the instructor. I’ve tried other methods of learning the Thai alphabet but Gary’s pictures are just what I needed to help me remember. I highly recommend this course. Cheron Gelber, Seattle

I've just finished the four half-day course learning the Thai script almost effortlessly and now I can read Thai. I am not often sure what the word means but I can read it in Thai. The course is based on associating each letter with a drawn character, sometimes funny, sometimes rude and always memorable. After a couple of lessons you can read some of the signs in the street and by the end of the course you are fluent in the Thai alphabet. This painless way of mastering the alphabet gives a sense of achievement and learning the language itself becomes less daunting, more interesting and great fun. Paul Sullivan, author, Chiang Mai

Read the articles in Bangkok Post, Bangkok Trader and 1stoppattaya: "The progress we made in our class was incredible, with everyone able to read basic words after just the first [half of the] day".

Please write back to me or click here for more details and to book online.

YOU need to sit quietly and study the video footage and you'll see very clearly that the woman started things by slapping the Thai mans face, this was followed by her son punching another Thai. I know that doesn't fit well with what you want but that is what happened and you can't change that.

As awful as this is, it underlines my number one rule that I advise expats and tourists to adhere to when in Thailand:

1. Do not get into an argument, heated discussion or fight with a Thai person for whatever reason, no matter how justified you are.

There are some (many) Thai people who do not have our (Western) sense of social decorum when it comes to disputes. They are not unlike the 'hoodies' or 'skinheads' in Britain who would knife you if you just looked at them funny, which might be no more than a curious stare lasting more than 3 seconds!

If you rile a Thai person, particularly if it's done in public (e.g. disputing the quality of work of a builder in front of his subordinates, or swearing at a Thai person in a bar) seems to flip them over the edge and they will become hell-bent on taking out a vendetta. If the Thai person is drunk then it'll usually trigger an OTT response there and then, or at most within the next hour or so (knifing or shooting, maybe physical blows, kicking, punching or a striking you with a deadly object). If not so drunk, the incident may simmer in his (or her) mind and friends will be called, you will be ambushed later on and either beaten up (if you're lucky) or knifed or shot.

No matter how it goes against the grain of our sense of principle or fairness, the only way to avoid a dangerous escalation is simply to smile, even apologize, and walk away!

I don't condone the cowardly behavior seen in the video, but you can't change deep resentments and senseless violence by complaining about it (or punishing the perpetrators). You wouldn't get annoyed and so pick a fight with a hyena or a mad dog, no matter what it did to you. You can't defend yourself against a vicious animal. All the animal wants to do is to destroy you. It has no human or social perspective.

In the same way, treat a slighted Thai person like a potentially vicious animal.

Smile. Apologize. Back away.

You may suffer from indignation, humiliation or feelings of impotence, but surely you're grown up enough to handle that, right? We are civilized Westerners, after all!

Bed-wetting is really no deal. It only becomes an issue if the parents make it an issue and then the bed-wetting continues and maybe even gets worse. xylophone and stupidfarang are right: just treat it as nothing-to-worry-about and it will disappear on it's own when she's good and ready.

However, please don't restrict her drinking just before bed-time, it's needlessly cruel and has absolutely no effect on whether a child wets the bed or not.

Urine is sterile and essentially salt-water (some people even drink it for 'health' reasons). So my recommendation is to be very matter-of-fact about it. Get a rubber/plastic mattress cover - something that can be easily rinsed and dried each day - to keep the mattress dry and stain-free. Buy a few extra sheets and wash (or just rinse/dry) them regularly. Make her a present of fluffy, light pajamas that won't get so soaked.

It may help to wake her up once or twice during the night (assuming you share the same sleep cycles) and take her to the bathroom to pee (and maybe even another drink of water if she's thirsty), but if you forget or she doesn't want to pee at the time then - as before - no big deal! (Having a potty and a jug of water near the bed might be more convenient if your bathroom is far away.)

The more relaxed and blasé you are about the whole business, the quicker it will sort itself out on its own. No need to make a fuss or care a jot if the bed is wet, and no need for effusive praise either if it's dry. She will have her sense of pride or achievement, so if she reports to you that the bed is dry then you can say something like "oh, that's good news" and if she says that it's wet then: "oh well, never mind..." and just go get the sheet(s) and give them a quick rinse.

It's a grown-up's problem because we say it is.

There we go again, despite all the government and the police efforts to minimize the carnage on the roads the first 52 dead in a day that not even a proper holiday time, one can only sigh in despair and sorrow......

Actually, according to WHO, the average fatality rate is around 65 people per day. So even though 52 is still tragic, it is a significant reduction from what it would otherwise have been, especially during a time when it would normally be a lot higher. So kudos to the government and traffic police for at least beginning to make an impact!

Thailand is still one of the highest in the world (360 fatalities p.a. per million people), but I was surprised to see that it's fairly high in the US also (100 fatalities per million). European countries tend to be reasonably low at only around 30-50 deaths per million.

I'd much rather the PM devote all his efforts to the really important problems besetting Thailand:

1. Unacceptably high death toll and injuries on the roads (and vehicle maintenance in general)
2. Slavery and people trafficking
3. Police incompetence and corruption wherever it exists, underfunding and undertraining, and corruption and organized crime in general
4. Wealthy people getting away with murder or manslaughter caused by gross negligence
5. The economy, inward investment, encouraging foreign know-how and development
6. Education
7. The environment
8. Democracy and good governance

Worrying about a bit of sexy skin here and there or people behaving outrageously or obscenely (but harmlessly) is a huge distraction and a waste of mental energy.

90 day reporting is very confusing. It has nothing to do with "overstay", which is staying longer than the date of the permission-to-stay stamp based on your visa.

It is important to understand the 90-day reporting dates properly.

1. If you remain in the country - for whatever reason - the cycle of 90 days starts from the date you last entered the country. So use a date calculator to work out what the "reporting date" is.

2. Now the date you need to report your current address is between 15 calendar days before the reporting date and up 7 days after. You can't do it earlier. If you are later than 7 days after the reporting date then you get fined 2,000 baht. If the 7th day happens to be a Saturday, Sunday or government holiday then you will get fined. If you arrive too late in the morning (i.e. anytime after 7am usually) and all the queue slots for that day have been used up then you have to come the next day, and you will be fined if you have missed the 7-day deadline.

3. You can also do it online. But you only have a one-week window in which you can do this. The first date is 15 days before the reporting date up till 7 days before the reporting date. If you don't do it on time (i.e. at least 7 days before the reporting date then you will have to go in and do it in person.

4. You can also do it by mail, but you must post the application no less than 15 days prior to the reporting date (see this TV post for more details). Make sure to send it by EMS so you have proof of sending. You should get a receipt within a few days. If not then you should revert to online or in-person reporting to be sure.

5. What most people get confused about is when the subsequent 90-day report dates are. It is not 180/270 days from your last date of entry. The next report date is 90 days after the last report date. So if you do your 90-day report 7 days before then your next report date will be 7 days earlier. Similarly if you happen to make it on the 7th day after your report date then your next report date will be 7 days later. Use a date calendar to be sure that you have the right date. For the 90-day report by mail, I'm guessing that your next report date will be 90 days after the date of the receipt (someone please correct me if I'm wrong).

6. Finally, the moment you leave the country then you are no longer required to do the 90-day report. It all starts again from zero, starting from the date you next re-enter the country.

As for making sure you don't forget (very easy to do!) always enter your next report date as an appointment in Outlook calendar or Google calendar or your To Do app or on your phone... and make sure that the reminder feature is either 2 weeks before your report date if you plan on doing it online, or 7 days before if you plan to go in. If your calendar/to-do app doesn't have an early reminder feature then set another reminder/appointment to yourself warning you that the 90-day report is due in 14 (or 7) days' time...

"And, every one of us expats here is an Economic Migrant, we're doing just what the Syrian refugees are doing except that we made a choice to leave home.."

You might be, I am not.

baboon, an "economic migrant" is someone who decides to move to another country in order to improve their quality of life. Unless you are a short-term tourist or doing missionary work, you are an economic migrant in Thailand. You are taking full advantage of the cheaper lifestyle, easier women and benefits that expats - and some women - traditionally enjoy in Thailand.

Go look in a library and look for books with titles such as: - The largest mass migrations in history and its consequences.

I suppose the largest mass migration was the one where Europeans migrated to America, followed by the Brits (and some Irish) moving to Australia. The Dutch, British and French Huguenots migrated en mass to South Africa. I think Jews migrating to Palestine, over the course of a few decades, was also a pretty large migration. I think we all know the consequences of these migrations.

I'm not so sure that a million people integrating into a spread of 'western' countries with a population totaling about 1 billion is going to be so affected. I'm also not sure that the refugees are mostly young, uneducated men although the language issue will be a big problem. The USA and UK printed something like $3 trillion dollars to hold back (or delay) the sub-prime financial crisis, I think the cost of the war in Iraq cost over $2 trillion and counting. There's plenty of money for the financial and military industries when it's wanted. And, yes, integrating a million refugees will be expensive, perhaps around €20 billion p.a. (about two aircraft carriers) for maybe 3 years. Dealing with unemployment amongst refugees and Greeks and Italians also isn't easy. (Although Betts' studies have shown that refugees and immigrants do create employment for local/native people also.)

All I'm saying is that we aren't all that different. Refugees are as skilled or as ignorant as any European or American, they're less prepared and not as well financed as we are. As economic migrants, we had time to choose and plan where to go. Refugees are usually forced out of their home countries with nothing but what they can carry. Don't be so smug: "there but for the grace of God, go I".

Life wouldn't be so cozy for us if we arrived in Thailand with no money, not being able to speak Thai and no prospects of a job. But at least we could probably join a temple!

The responses to my post above is what sickens me, these are the attitudes that are allowing the misery and death to continue.

Even if are not the offspring of immigrants/refugees, we certainly benefit from the efforts of our ancestors. We are no more "entitled" to our privileged lives in the West than are the Syrians or anyone else. Very few of us can say that we actively contributed to the infrastructure and economy or politics of our homeland. And, every one of us expats here is an Economic Migrant, we're doing just what the Syrian refugees are doing except that we made a choice to leave home - they didn't really have that choice.

To baerboxer, it's such hubris to expect ordinary people to "solve" the problems of their own country. I was an inexperienced, naive, fairly ignorant 20-year old when I escaped South Africa. I was required to kill people to "defend my country", people who were either citizens who happened to have dark skin or were residents of a country illegally occupied by South Africa. I refused. There was no way I would be able to solve the problems of Apartheid, other than go underground and join the resistance movement or something. I wasn't prepared to be a killer or a martyr. If you were in my position, what would YOU do? In my case, it turns out that I didn't need to seek asylum after all because I dug up a British ancestor so I was "entitled" to be European. But digging further back, my great grandparents were refugees also, from Eastern Europe.

Whether we come from refugee ancestors or were born to a "native" family, none of us are any more entitled to our heritage than anyone else - unless you contributed personally to building infrastructure or improving the economy or benefiting the community in some way. Most of us only contribute in the sense that we are consumers, and lead privileged lives because of our ancestors and an accident of birth.

It seems no-one watched Alexander Bett's talk either and then just wrote a knee-jerk response to my post. His studies show that refugees/immigrants create employment on the whole, they aren't a drain on resources; 40% of the workforce of immigrant-owned businesses are local citizens!

It's interesting how the most vociferous comments come from people taking full social and economic advantage of living in Thailand, rather than stay at home and contribute to their local economies and be active in solving the problems of their own country.

And of those living the life of Riley here in Thailand, how many have actually bothered to learn Thai and integrate with Thai society, accept the Buddhist religion or are actively contributing to improving the economy and solving the socio-economic-political problems in Thailand?

I'm sickened by the appalling and callous treatment of these refugees and, like Alexander Betts, I am ashamed to be European.

We are nearly all of us refugees or economic migrants of one kind or another. Every single American, Australian, Israeli or (white) South African comes from some kind of refugee background. All of us living in Thailand are economic migrants (and very privileged ones at that)! Sure, many Brits and Germans and French people can perhaps claim to be "pure blood", but we enjoy the freedom to choose where we want to live and work, virtually anywhere in the world - if we ever feel disenchanted with our vater- or motherland, we wouldn't hesitate to up sticks and settle somewhere more conducive (and because we can afford it and have the right passport, we don't have to be labelled as a refugee - even though we're doing exactly what they want to do).

Refugees tend to be people who don't want to leave their homeland. Economic migrants (like us) are looking for greener pastures and we tend to have the wherewithal to achieve this. Either way, people who relocate are hungry for opportunities and are prepared to work hard to improve their lives and live with decency and dignity - often not for themselves but for their children.

Much of the crisis is indirectly the fault of meddling politics and corruption of our Western military-industrial politics and economies, it's not just about religion and crazy Muslims. The majority of Syrians (and other refugees) would be very happy to ditch their religion - it's been forced upon them anyway, just as in Europe most of us (or our grandparents) were forced to be Catholics or Protestants. And those Muslims who do want to continue practicing their religion will most likely want to do so in a far more moderate manner (in Europe, we can all enjoy wine and beer without getting our hands chopped off, and we can discuss our religious beliefs and question it and even be blasphemous). If I were a moderate Muslim, the last place I'd want to live in is a Muslim country! Besides, many of the refugees are Christian or some other religion anyway.

Sure, many of the refugees are uncouth and uneducated, even lazy. I was also, as a young 'asylum seeker' from South Africa during the Apartheid era. I got civilized quite quickly after I moved to the UK. And I gained work experience, greater expertise in my field, started companies, employed people, made and spent money - I became a good economic citizen: a consumer!

Blocking refugees is tantamount to murder (at least accessory to murder). By blocking refugees, we are condoning people trafficking, organized crime and putting people's lives in mortal danger. It's time we stopped this nonsense and find ways to bring in these people and their families. We can afford it. And not only can we afford it (because it doesn't cost us anything, it's a relatively simple matter of borrowing against the future which we do all the time, particularly for the financial and military industries, and social services) - the investment that we make now will pay back dividends in the future. Refugees are good for our economies - they create new industries, we get cheap labour (without having to rely on workhouses or child/slave labour in China or India) and we gain an entirely new demographic of young(er) people who will pay for our pensions and healthcare when we're too old to work for ourselves!

It's morally right and in our best interests to let them in and take care of them!

1. Safety:

3 phase electricity;

2. Practical:

3. Design

I agree that this is what Thai designers need to know about what Westerners want in a house. From my own experience and preferences, and in helping others to retire here, I'd say that in general:

• safety is definitely an important issue: safe electrical installations with earth and RCBOs, sturdy railings on stairs and upper floors, etc.
• a sense of space and natural light is one of the main reasons we come to Thailand (most of us are escaping the dark, dingy, wet, cold existence in our home country) - designs should have clean lines, no fiddly, ornate decorative elements which Thais seem to like so much.
• economic (cheap and convenient to run and maintain), a way of have air-conditioning or cool air or natural air flow (without aircon) without a huge electricity bill each month - the other main reason why we come to Thailand (Chiang Mai in particular) is because of the cheaper cost of living!
• mosquito and insect free - we want to be able to open the doors and windows but keep out the mosquitoes and flies and ants and mice and geckos (from getting into the microwave or other electrical appliances).
• a feeling of being outdoors or having easy (and visible) access to the outside, not tiny balconies that you can't sit in: the weather allows us to enjoy nature and plants and sunlight, but we can't deal with the heat (and mosquitoes), so the design should allow us to have a nice outdoor space and a nice green view but still stay cool and dry (so lots of roofing and mosquito netting without blocking the view or feeling dark and claustrophobic).
• we don't like cheap, shoddy sub-standard construction - even though we want to save money and live economically, a cheaply-built house is expensive and inconvenient in the long term because of all the repairs and maintenance required later on... always use standard, high quality materials in the design and construction (it doesn't have to be top quality and expensive like marble or teak wood, but everything should be a minimum standard). For example, electrical cabling should be the proper standard and tubing should be used, not just wires nailed to the walls, the plumbing should use thick PVC or copper where necessary, the concrete should be a high grade mixture, the door and window frames should be good quality aluminum or steel, not PVC, the doors should be solid wood or plastwood or conwood (not hollow PVC or ply-wood), etc.
• convenience (as mentioned before) - lots of plug outlets and switches, lots of built-in storage, easy to navigate, no "dead" spaces.

That's my theory, anyway

You know, I've always wondered where all those who screamed blue murder about social services doing their job and working to protect those most at risk in society went when they got tired of their ranting and raving.

I've lost track. Is there an indication or allegations that this child is being abused by the father? Is there any indication that the child was being abused by the mother? Is there any indication that anything is happening other than the government wanting to have control? If there is any indication that the child is being abused, I'm all for the government stepping in. I know it happens and I know it's necessary. I also know of cases where they totally get it wrong and abuse their discretion.

Here's an oh-so-typical account of what the UK government gets up to, usually in secret.In this case, it was exposed. In most cases, you can go to prison (it's called innocuously "contempt of court") for revealing any information, no matter how minor, about your kids or your plight with the "child protection" agencies. (BTW, the clandestine recording of the social worker stating: "we will be applying for a court order to remove your baby at birth and put it up for adoption, even though we have no particular concerns..." was quickly removed from youtube following a court order.)

If it didn't happen to us in almost exactly the same way, I would never have believed it. Like most people, I would have thought it's some kind of sensationalist reporting or at the very least "there's no smoke without fire". We also had a social worker (who we had never met before) introduce herself to myself and my pregnant wife with the words: "Hello, my name is Su Tan. We have concerns about the welfare of your baby when it is born, so we will be applying for an ICO to take it away at birth and try to find a good family who will adopt it and look after it properly."

Since that moment on, I recorded everything, even the court proceedings. I also provided video evidence of how we took care of our children in the 6-8 years since they were born and how happy and healthy they appear, but the judge refused to look at it. Throughout the sorry saga, we were presumed guilty and we had to prove our innocence (viz. our ability to care for our children safely and without neglect, which includes agreeing not to homeschool them of course) beyond a reasonable doubt. We engaged two separate legal teams (one to represent me and another to represent my wife). We were lucky (!) because the legal teams understood perfectly that it wasn't about "rights" or "the law", it was about massaging the egos of the social workers and their managers, and the local authority legal advisors, and the children's guardian, and most importantly the judge(s) at the Family Court. Nearly everyone else I subsequently met who had similar experiences did not have the same legal guns as us and they usually lost their children.

My belief is that the main reason why real abuse is seldom discovered is because the authorities are squandering all their time and resources on chasing after irrelevant little "concerns" and have nothing left to investigate the real cases. I've been advocating that social workers should represent the parents exclusively, in a case of a family in crisis or who are simply struggling to make ends meet, and to provide whatever resources and help they can think of to help the family to cope. If there are any real concerns of real child abuse (viz., sexual molestation, physical violence, real neglect) then that should be the responsibility of a special child-protection police force, not the job of social workers with psychology degrees they picked up at the North London College for Nurses. (Fat chance...)

BTW, what Su Tan and the Calderdale council (in the youtube clip) failed to realise is that their intended actions were completely illegal according to an ECHR ruling in 2000. This ruling was the result of a case where a baby that was wrongfully given away at birth for adoption and even when it was subsequently deemed illegal it wasn't possible for the baby to be returned! The legal process took so long that it was deemed too emotionally traumatic and unsettling for the child to be told that the adopted parents weren't her real parents and that she had been stolen. She'll be about 20 now. So I wonder whether they've told her yet and what kind of psychological trauma she'll be experiencing if that were the case...

"Miles failed to attend a meeting arranged by Devon council to address concerns about the girl’s welfare. A judge has officially ordered that she be returned to the UK."

A custody battle, no reason to think that Zara is in trouble.

We had to attend several meetings arranged by the Social Services at the local council. If I knew then what I know now, I would have also taken the first plane out the country with my kids before getting inextricably embroiled in the legal process. These meetings are a farce. Parents have absolutely no legal rights and the meetings are basically rubber-stamping decisions already taken by the social workers privately beforehand. The only rights parents have are to be formally informed of the decision: their own input is irrelevant. Usually, the meeting is simply to inform the parent(s) that the child's name is to be placed on the At Risk Register, without any explanation what this means and what the implications are. Well, the implications are dire: officially, the family is entitled to "support" by the various children's services but what happens in practice is that if the parent(s) don't "cooperate" then it is very easy to obtain an order to remove the child, the parent(s) don't need to be present at the court hearing (which basically rubber-stamps the Interim Care Order) and they needn't be informed either until after the fact. An ICO gives the Social Services power over the child for about 2 months, but it is always routinely renewed indefinitely (every two months) by a family court judge. With an ICO, children can be removed and placed in foster care - and if the child is young and cute the standard procedure is to start the process of putting it up for adoption (without requiring the biological parents' consent). Older children's wishes are routinely ignored also (illegally so according to the Voice of the Child). Zara will have no say in who she'd prefer to live with, despite being the legal age of consent, usually around 11 or 12...

It's a grinding, inexorable process that can't be easily stopped once started. Get out while you can! Trevor, you did the right thing.

lhvdberg, it's gratifying to know that the driver is a serious guy who perhaps tries to be a safe driver. Unfortunately, he was obviously still driving irresponsibly - it's his responsibility to check the brakes EVERY TIME he starts out on a trip (and always at the start of a long downwards incline: it's just a matter of pumping the brakes a few time to see if they're still working!) and to regularly check things like brake fluid and oil levels. Whenever going down a steep hill (especially with twisty turns), the gear should never be higher than 2, using the engine compression as a natural breaking effect to keep the speed of the vehicle under control. If he is genuinely a serious driver then he will find out more about how to drive safely and even attend a safety driving course. If his company (or school) won't pay for it then he should do so himself.

There's obviously no requirement in Thailand. In other countries you need special training to get a driving license if the passengers are members of the public (or if you drive a vehicle that can seat more than 7 people I think). But a serious and professional driver will get the proper training anyway, even if it isn't legally required. I did it. I'm not a professional driver, but I learnt things about how to drive safely that I would never have learnt by myself as an experienced driver.

I'd be inclined to doubt any statements issued by the British local councils (aka Social Services or "child welfare") or the orders of the Family Court. We were also the target of these so-called child-protection agencies over a decade ago. The authorities were vicious and cruel and twisted everything (apparently perjury doesn't apply to police officers or social workers). It became bizarre in the extreme (e.g. I was accused in court of being a "vegetarian". We were also "neglecting" our children because we chose to homeschool them, which is perfectly legal in the UK under the Education Act, but that's another government department of course...)

We ended up battling the authorities for 3 years at a cost of nearly £500,000 and left the UK as soon as we could thereafter. Our children's wishes were blatantly ignored (illegal under the concept of "Voice of the Child"). I discovered that there are tens of thousands of families caught up in the same sticky web. I met one single mother who's 12-year old son was removed from her to be fostered by her mother (the reason: the mother was suffering from a debilitating blood disorder so didn't have the energy to care adequately for him; so the solution was to take him away, rather then provide home help and nursing care for the mother). What was stunningly cruel and bizarre was that the boy ran away regularly to rejoin his mother - and the police were sent to arrest him and take him back! I know another family who had their baby daughter forcibly removed and given away for adoption. They were not allowed to have any information about or contact with her. (The reason: the father had problems managing his anger...) Here's the insanely cruel part: they also had an 8-year old son who wasn't removed and who also wasn't allowed to have any contact with his sister. He couldn't understand why not and experienced all sorts of confused anguish. (I would consider that a good case of "emotional abuse"...) He was told that she wasn't his sister any more! This is legal in the UK. An adopted child is no longer deemed to be a member of his/her biological family, even if the child or his/her siblings want to remain in contact!

Nearly all the cases I came across involve the Social Services tearing families apart for the silliest of reasons - and it rarely boils down to anything really serious (like physical or sexual abuse). It's usually "concern for the child's welfare" or "emotional abuse" (which can be anything from hearing the parents arguing to having to deal with a parent's debilitating illness or possibly substance addiction) or "risk of neglect" (which can be not providing a proper breakfast in the morning, not keeping the fingernails clean, or homeschooling). In nearly every case, the problems could be more practically (and humanely) dealt with by providing funding, home help or after-school care - but the inevitable response to that is "we don't have sufficient resources". Yeah... but they seem to have unlimited resources when it comes to removing children to be fostered by strangers (who get paid around £400 per child per week) and spending time in court (average cost of litigation per case is around £400,000). That kind of money could keep a family in retirement (with all the support they could handle) for 20 years or at least until the children are adults!

My advice: leave Zara and Trevor alone. Let them live peacefully and without interference in Thailand and tell the UK authorities to go to hell.

Krabi Local, could you contact me privately, I'd like some more information if I may to use (anonymously) in my ebook about tips for traveling to and living in Thailand.

Any place is dangerous, and Thailand is on-the-whole one of the safer destinations if you keep your wits about you. The problem is that any place you're not familiar with can be deadly and, especially when you're in a holiday mood you tend to relax your guard and do stupid things sometimes.

I'm extremely relieved that Grace was found. Contrary to what many posters here have written (many of which are unnecessarily cruel comments), disaster can strike anyone at any time. My daughter (same age) got struck with encephalitis when in Malaysia (probably picked it up on the plane!), luckily she got home in time Actually, I found her catatonic, outdoors, and rushed her to hospital. She ended up in hospital on her next trip overseas, she passed out in a shopping center and was rushed to the local A&E. Very unlucky. I thought it was a relapse of encephalitis. Similar symptoms but completely unrelated. It turns out she'd been drinking too much water (just water, can you believe it!?). Low sodium levels in your blood causes disorientation and seizures. It can be deadly if not treated correctly.

I've also had some close shaves that could easily have ended up in disaster. And I know several friends who've ended up seriously ill (in one case dead) for anything from a stupid lapse of judgement to water on the road to some other idiot driving too fast on the road to a dog coming out of nowhere to bite you on the leg.

And we're not all psychologically balanced either. Going on a trip can bring things to the surface that is kind of manageable at home (because of routines, habits, familiar surroundings, etc.) Heck, I'm a stable person, but I've occasionally flipped and got into potentially dangerous (or illegal) situations. Sometimes it could just be a bad day. Sometimes it's a case of 'male' pre-menstrual disorder. So imagine how difficult it must be for a young woman (or guy) on an exciting adventure in unfamiliar surroundings (in a language you can't read or understand), and when things go wrong and start to unravel...?

As bluewater and gecko says: "Learn to read first"! Please see the post about my upcoming intensive Rapid Read Thai workshop. It may seem expensive, I know, but it'll say you a lot of time and effort (and money) in the long run.

A lot of people think that Thai is a difficult language (because of the tones perhaps?).

Actually, Thai is probably one of the simplest languages in the world to learn - because it's logical and consistent. The conventional ways of teaching Thai is what makes it unnecessarily complicated, what with letter classes, short and long vowels, initial and final sounds and the mostly incorrect way of describing the so-called tones.

We use the same tones in English, but we use tones to express emotion or to emphasize something or to ask a question. We already say these intonations naturally, so if you apply them to the Thai tones then it will also come across as natural. Ironically, Thais tend to speak in a monotone in fast, colloquial speech. You need to get a sense for when 'tones' are important and when you can ignore them.

In the Rapid Method, I've done away with everything that's superfluous (such as writing!) and, using a non-linguistic approach, have simplified Thai reading, speaking and understanding to the bare essentials. This video explains what I've done.

ADVERT



I'm running my intensive six-day Rapid Read Thai boot camp in Chiang Mai (January 25-30, Mon-Fri, 8am-5pm).

It seems counter-intuitive to learn to read Thai before speaking, but it's actually the most effective way to do so. With the Rapid Method, it isn't difficult and it doesn't take long. It's an essential springboard for being able to absorb Thai independently from your surroundings, without the need to attend classes or study contrived language books.

The remarkable thing about reading is that not only can you speak more clearly, you also hear and understand what people are saying. That's why I've created karaoke-style audio-ebooks and extracted original Thai subtitles from movies to study.

But that comes later. First learn to read (and sound out the words and tones distinctly).

To find out more and to book please visit the workshop page.



The Rapid Method is a process. It's a minimalistic approach that's designed to be relaxed, non-linguistic and require as little effort and time as possible so that you can incorporate a little but steady learning into your daily life. Ideal for busy or lazy people.

If you're just starting to learn Thai then this is an essential first step along the Yellow Brick Road.

And if you've been living in Thailand for many years and can only speak some mangled Thai (if at all) then you already know how much a waste of time and money and effort the conventional approaches are. Come and get a fresh start.

If you can't make the workshop then you can also follow the same course online at your own convenience.

Dear TV skeptics,

You are welcome to make disparaging remarks, I've heard them all before and there are plenty on this forum already. But before doing so please inform yourself properly by trying out the Rapid Method first. I'll be happy to respond to queries or comments about effective ways of learning Thai.

In the free trial, you will learn about 30 top letters and be able to recognize hundreds of small, simple Thai words within about two hours of working through the course.

Enjoy!

No. 6 - traffic is dangerous

I've written about this elsewhere. Despite plenty of experience driving in Thailand, I still get caught off guard sometimes.

Here are some common dangers to be aware of:

1. If you come from a country that drives on the right, be EXTRA EXTRA careful, especially as a pedestrian! You will instinctively start looking in the wrong direction. So a good rule of thumb is to look three or even four times before you start, and to keep looking both ways at all times while you are crossing.
   
2. Thai drivers routinely overtake each other regardless of oncoming traffic (and on bends). The driver simply expects you to somehow get out of the way. Be vigilant, be aware of what's in the motorbike lanes and be ready to edge over to the left at a moment's notice.
   
3. Thai drivers routinely jump the red lights at an intersection. Just because the light is green, don't assume that it's safe to go!
   
4. When on your bike and driving in the motorbike lane with stationary or slow-moving traffic on your right, it often happens that someone turns into a side lane just as you're driving past (they’re obscured by the car immediately in front and to the side of you and they won't bother to check for oncoming bikes); so be super-vigilant whenever you are passing other vehicles. Give yourself time to react and stop or slow down quickly if necessary.
   
5. Pedestrians do not have right of way, even when crossing at a pedestrian crossing when the green walk light is on! Drivers will drive straight through the red lights if they don't see anyone actively crossing - and usually they drive through even while you are crossing (and often they don't even notice)!
   
6. In general, don't speed - or at least drive only as fast as you can safely and suddenly stop or avoid an obstruction (or pedestrian or dog or a vehicle coming at you from out of the blue in front or from the side).
   
   Watch your back!! Thai drivers tend to tailgate when driving so they will not be able to stop in time if you stop suddenly - even if you stop at a red light! You need to have plenty of space and time to stop gradually if necessary in the case of someone tailgating you. Slow down if the car behind you is too close to give yourself and the driver behind you extra time to react and, if you can, edge over to the left and let him pass.
   
7. When it's wet, drive even more defensively. The water on the roads might just as well be oil, and it's almost impossible to see clearly. And many Thai drivers drive just as fast and recklessly as on a regular bright, sunny day!
   
   Keep in mind also that dozens of motorbikes have no lights at all (bicycles and mobile food carts very seldom have any lights either), the tail or brake lights of many cars are faulty, and Thai people have dark skin and wear dark clothes.
   
8. Finally, watch out for pedestrians (and dogs and cyclists) who seem to have absolutely no awareness of traffic. They will cross the street without bothering to look at all. And even those that do look seem to wait until you're almost upon them and then suddenly dash out in front of you!

BTW, check that your insurance policy covers you for motorbike accidents (whether driving or as a passenger). Often they don't, or if they do then the cover is usually halved!

Please drive, walk and cross roads with extreme caution at all times.

It’s wonderful how this call for blood went ‘viral’ so quickly and that Lucy got the blood and treatment she needed.

My daughter was involved in a similar accident, crossing an intersection on her scooter just as the light turned green while the other driver accelerated through the red light. She was relatively lucky, only a few scrapes and concussion and just one week in hospital. Her passenger friend wasn’t so lucky, having to have several operations on her neck and throat over several months. If they hadn’t been wearing their helmets, they’d both be dead! Nevertheless, because their injuries were “normal”, we couldn’t appeal for public support or funding of course…

I’m working on an ebook to warn people of these kinds of dangers in Thailand. Travelers have virtually no experience of the reckless and erratic driving in Thailand. it’s so common for drivers to ignore red lights that most people in Thailand know to check for this before driving through an intersection (usually). Even the lights are now timed to allow an extra few seconds for the jumpers before switching to green.

But I’ve seen a lot worse and inexperienced drivers and tourists are at grave risk as a result.

If you are new to Thailand then, in the meantime, please search for tips or information about driving conditions here. It could save your life!

One of the most common dangers is when someone overtakes another car coming directly towards you. The driver simply expects you to somehow get out of the way. Firstly, you have to be aware of the oncoming car – it’s not something you anticipate, so it takes time to take it in and react. Secondly, there is usually a motorbike lane that you can veer into – but it’s not always possible to do so if there’s a car parked there already, or another bike already in the lane. If you're on a bike yourself, it is assumed that you will use the motorbike lane, so do so if you can. But when you edge out onto the main part of the road because of parked cars, say, be extra vigilant about cars behind you, as well as cars and bikes coming directly towards you.

(Note. Take care when you use the motorbike lanes because there are some sections that have dangerous pot holes or bumps from tree roots. So don't speed along these lanes!)

Despite plenty of experience driving in Thailand, I still get caught off guard sometimes. Here are some special considerations:

1. If you come from a country that drives on the right, be EXTRA EXTRA careful, especially as a pedestrian! It's already super dangerous, even in a 'safe' country like the UK; I personally know of several people who have been run over (and killed) because they crossed a road while looking left instead of right - where the cars are coming from in left-side-driving countries. You will instinctively start looking in the wrong direction. So a good rule of thumb is to look three or even four times before you start, and to keep looking both ways at all times while you are crossing. There are a few streets (notably Sukhumvit Road in Bangkok) where the direction of traffic changes during rush hour!
   
2. When on your bike and driving in the motorbike lane with stationary or slow-moving traffic on your right, it often happens that someone turns into a side lane just as you're driving past (they’re obscured by the car immediately in front and to the side of you and they won't bother to check for oncoming bikes); so be super-vigilant whenever you are passing other vehicles, even if they are stationary and you have a clear stretch of road in front of you. Give yourself time to react and stop or slow down quickly if necessary.
   
3. When turning left into a main road from a side lane: it’s normal to look right for oncoming traffic on your side of the road and not to bother with checking left because you don’t expect a car that’s overtaking at high speed coming directly at you on the left.
   
4. Pedestrians do not have right of way, even when crossing at a pedestrian crossing when the green walk light is on! Drivers will drive straight through the red lights if they don't see anyone actively crossing - and usually they drive through even while you are crossing (and often they don't even notice)!
   
5. In general, don't speed - or at least drive only as fast as you can safely and suddenly stop or avoid an obstruction (or pedestrian or dog or a vehicle coming at you from out of the blue in front or from the side). It's not at all uncommon to smash straight into a stationary vehicle or one coming across you from the side. It usually results in instant death if you're on a bike (imagine the effect of being slammed into a brick wall at 50kmph or even 40kmph).
   
   Watch your back!! Thai drivers tend to tailgate when driving (and typically will be using their phone, picking their nose or even texting) so they will not be able to stop in time if you stop suddenly - even if you stop at a red light! (They will be expecting you to run the light... and will crash straight into your rear if you do stop.) You need to have plenty of space and time to stop gradually if necessary in the case of someone tailgating you. Slow down if the car behind you is too close to give yourself and the driver behind you extra time to react and, if you can, edge over to the left and let him pass.
   
   Remember that Thai drivers' reaction times are even slower due to drink. A lot of drivers will be tipsy, especially late at night. Be extra vigilant.
   
6. When it's wet, drive even more defensively - treat it just like the icy, slippery conditions at home. The water on the roads might just as well be oil, and it's almost impossible to see clearly. And many Thai drivers drive just as fast and recklessly as on a regular bright, sunny day!
   
   Keep in mind also that dozens of motorbikes have no lights at all (bicycles and mobile food carts very seldom have any lights either), the tail or brake lights of many cars are faulty, and Thai people have dark skin and wear dark clothes. You will be driving among shadows.
   
7. Finally, watch out for pedestrians (and dogs and cyclists) who seem to have absolutely no awareness of traffic. They will cross the street without bothering to look at all. And even those that do look seem to wait until you're almost upon them and then suddenly dash out in front of you!

There’s so much more that maybe there should be a kind of safety driving course available to tourists and new expats before being allowed on the roads at all.

Please drive, walk and cross roads with extreme caution at all times.

you can hold a limited conversation with a child, before they have even gone to school & learnt to read. So why should that come first for us.?

Oxo, children learn very differently - they go through a phase of mimicking everything they hear without any understanding. What they seem to be doing is training their muscles to produce the sounds. You'll be surprised at how much strength, energy and dexterity goes into saying something like "stop" or "gears". (The "t" is quite explosive, the "p" is spat out very abruptly, the "g" requires a lot of force from your throat and glottal muscles and the final "s" is a very sophisticated and difficult to execute "zzzz". We do all this easily and automatically.)

So as adults, we tend not to have this amazing muscle memory and fine motor control for alien sounds usually found in a foreign language. It's something we need to train for.

Unfortunately, if you try to learn these sounds and then try to produce them, we fall back on the sounds from our native language. We don't even hear the alien sounds because we kind of replay them internally and convert them into familiar sounds in the process. To add to the difficulty, there is no standard, accurate way to represent the Thai sounds phonetically using English letters [unless perhaps you learn the International Phonetic Alphabet first].

So the Thai we end up speaking is a kind of blunt, garbled version of Thai - like a Singaporean or (worse) Chinese person speaking English. No matter how fluent you might be, you just sound wrong - and it takes a native person quite some time to attune her or his ear to your way of speaking. (If you're not Scottish, for instance, it's almost impossible to understand a Scotsman speaking English. And people from the Midlands say "her" for "hair" and "poop" for "pup", etc....)

Finally, as adults, we learn strategically. Rote memorization and brute-force repetition doesn't really work for us anymore. It might simply be because we don't spend 5-10 years working at it for 12 hours a day, day in and day out. We have better things to do. Remember, we take at least ten years to learn our own language. A 10-year old might be able to speak fluently, but he won't have all that much to say. You can't really have a decent conversation with someone until they're at least 12 and usually not much before 14 or 15 years old.

I devised the Rapid Method as an attempt to address this problem. As adults, we learn very effectively if we can harness what we already know and can do it quickly (we have busy work and social lives, so very few of us are prepared to study arduously for hours at a time).

It doesn't take long to learn to read Thai. The way that it is traditionally taught is unnecessarily complicated. But the writing system is actually very logical and consistent (unlike English with "plan/plane/planet", "through/rough/bough", "finger/singer", "knight/gnat/knot", "no/not", "often/listen", etc. etc. etc.)

So once you've learnt to read Thai (and it's fairly easy if you use a visual, story and mnemonic approach), you have a framework that tells you precisely how to pronounce a Thai word. This means that you can start the process of correctly training your speaking muscles to speak accurately and fluently, it's just muscle training after all.

It also means that your brain somehow interprets the sounds you hear accurately. We seem to only hear what we expect to hear. When you listen 'aurally', you tend not to hear what people are saying, so you have to fill in the gaps and re-interpret the words and meanings. It all happens subconsciously and almost instantaneously.

When you can follow the text at the same time - and eventually this becomes a subconscious mental process (kind of like reading off a blackboard at the back of your head) - then you will find that you can hear what is being said crystal clear! It's remarkable.

This is all a kind of free bonus that comes as a side effect of being able to read Thai.

An equally important reason for learning to read is that you can pick up Thai directly from your environment, without having to go out of your way to attend a class or study a text book (with phonetic transliterations). I think this is why most people give up on Thai - it's too much of an effort and a waste of time.

But when you can read, you are learning all the time, just by being out and about and paying attention to the signs and notices and menus.

This drip-feed approach is an integral part of the Rapid Method. Learning a language is something you need to do continuously in your life but in small doses (I should call it the Hydroponic approach maybe).

As a wise Chinaman once said: "The best time to grow a tree is twenty years ago. The second best time is now."