PeaceBlondie

The last part, having connections with some of the existing teachings at the school, probably doesn't apply to a newbie. However, it really helped me to get my current job, only my second one in Thailand.

The other factors are all signficant, even essential, at least to some degree. A big failure in any one of them would eliminate most candidates, at least at schools where you'd want to work. A school that is willing to employ a sloppily dressed teacher with an almost non-existent resume, etc., - like the case Harry Palmer mentions - is probably a school to avoid.

So, let's see where we are here, so far, supposedly, allegedly:

A guy who was so drunk he never paid attention (to a course which should have taught him a lot, and for which he says he paid 150,000 baht), didn't teach him anything, because he wasn't paying attention. Then he worked for several years and got the experience that taught him a lot of things he might have learnt in class.

IJWT missed out on the TEFL class but accumulated several years of experience, and is now a good teacher without the cert.

Okay, then there's me (or I). First I got my degree, then my TEFL cert in Thailand, then started getting the experience. The training helped me to get started. The experience helps even more.

And what self-respecting TEFL course, especially a CELTA, lets you go through all the classes stoned out of your mind, and then gives you the certificate?

Methinks I smell a rat.

A training course is worthless if you don't even try to learn in it. A training course very well might be very helpful if you apply yourself in class and study hard.

yessireebob, it OUGHT to be a given. But have you seen some of those slobs at the border? Short pants, reeking of alcohol and ciggies, acting impertinent and arrogant - they get what they deserve.

My favorite idiocy is when the foreigner tries to tell the government official how to do his job......that'll get you back at the wrong end of the queue.

I cancelled my october trip BKK=Manila=BKK, but the only cheap airline was Air France, about US$260, about 11,000 baht. I got the quote through Yahoo Travel.

Well, what can one add to a thread that's already about ten pages long? But that never kept me from adding a few words or more.

Nemesis, as usual, you're making some sweeping generalizations, which are clouded by your limited experience in Thailand. But then, so do I, at times.

25,000 per month is beginning salary for any English speaker straight off the plane. If they have skills, a university degree, decent appearance, brains, and the ability to get ahead in an organization like a school, they'll be making over 35,000 within two years (more in Bangkok), especially if they can wangle private lessons and keep the money coming in.

Especially if he's wiling to seriously get involved with a woman over 35, a well-behaved ajarn at a Thai govt. school will find himself surrounded by fairly good looking, well-dressed female uni graduates, many of them from upper middle-class families, who are divorced and independent, and not as fixed in their modern ways as a Western divorcee. Most of these hard-working, well educated Thai women have their own late model sedan, a reasonable sized home, and a salary about double the middle class plodders who will never get a pension. Nice pickings, if you're looking for a tight va**na.

Likewise, if he keeps out of the bars and the whore houses, a gay teacher can find a respectable, employed, hard-working non-barboy long-term lover.

Dysfunctional men, however, have to pay bargirls.

So, Nemesis, this is where you've been hiding lately. Well, I've nearly kinda sorta almost missed reading your comments.

It's hard to count world wars. Whoever said that 'ww1' was mostly European made a good point. Apparently the problem was that so many countries had made mutual defense pacts, so that when one crazy Serb killed an arch-duke, all the countries had to defend their "allies." Not a good idea to have too many defense pacts. SEATO was used as an excuse for the USA to defend its ally, the corrupt Catholic leaders of Vietnam.

Now we're back to the Wild Wild West, where no defense pacts are necessary; you're either with Dubya or you're against Dubya.

I don't think religion CAUSES these conflicts; I think religion is just used as an [unacceptable, irrational, clever] EXCUSE for conflicts.

I don't normally carry more than 5000 baht on my person,

let alone 20-30,000. There are some good pick pockets around,

who will slit your bag or pocket and the money will be gone before you

know it.

Take your bank book with you and show them the balance printed in there.

Thanks, astral. This is such a dramatic change that I'll wait a week or two before definitely advising my friend, who's going to do his 90-day run on his non-imm B (multiple) around the 9th of October. By then, his Thai bank book will have multiple entries of monthly deposits by the employer, relatively unused. Then he might print out his foreign bank statement showing huge monthly pension deposits, also not fully used. Plus a current ATM statement showing the present balance.

Do you think that should be good enough? How else can he satisfy the immigration officers, other than being well dressed and respectful?

Point of clarification, please: does this enforcement of the regulations apply to the usual 30-day tourist visas that some people go to Mae Sai every month to get, year upon year? On the other hand, would it apply to somebody like my friend who has a one year non-imm B and merely has to leave the country every 90 days? He's got a job and his employer deposits his salary directly into the bank, plus he's got substantial income streams from his home country. Do you think they'd even ask? If so, what should he take with him next time?

Lopburi3

Well back from the Swim Club and today I stopped at Lotus for some small shopping and a " Burger instead of noodles"

The burger set was 80Baht. Home it is around 400 baht and up.

I also bought:

Bread 25 baht. Home it is from 70Baht up.

Milk 30 baht. Home 60 baht.

Yoghurt 10 Baht. Home 50 baht

Jam 30 baht. Home 80 baht.

Cornflakes 46 baht. Home 125 baht.

6pack Coke Light boxes 67 Baht.Home 400 Baht.

6pack Singha boxes 147 baht. Home 540 Baht.

Elle (magazin for Mrs.) 80 baht. Home 360 baht.

Potatochips 17 Baht. Home 120 Baht.

Well I shall admit that 10 times was overdue, but I feel safe if I keep it to around 5times.

As much as I hate to disagree, as a newcomer, but a burger set at Burger King in Chiang Mai last week cost me 129 baht (but it was double meat cheese bacon). They're always on sale in Texas, more like 200 baht for a set.

Bread back home often cost 89 cents (35 baht) for a pound and a half. Milk, less than $3 per gallon. Back home I drank countless cans of Coke Light, $2.16 with tax for 12 cans so a six pack cost 41 baht. This was as recently as 2002/2003.

Depends where you shop. Depends what you buy. And if you buy the sales specials.

I've rented the same luxury condo in Chiang Mai, 1260 square feet furnished, for over a year - guarded 24/7 covered parking, breathtaking views, etc. I pay 6,500 baht. Lights and water, 1300 baht. I bought the fastest domestically legal sportbike here for about $1,350 (which costs 3,000 pounds in England); my last new bike in Texas was the cheapest sportbike available, $4,000.

In summary, not counting my mild support for my live-in partner, I spend no more than my monthly salary of 25,000 baht (and I don't pay tax!). HOWEVER, visa runs, one trip home per year, and the occasional other holidays, run over 110,000 baht per year. My medical insurance (minimal BUPA at age 61) cost 9,000 per year. But a doctor visit to a real specialist MD costs 200 baht, including the nurse's fee. I got a partial denture for 3,200 baht in Chiang Mai (good job), and the dentist in Texas also wanted 3,200 - but he wanted that many DOLLARS!

I couldn't live on my pension back home. Here, I can almost bank it all.

Well, I don't know. In my previous life as a tax auditor, even the Tax Court allowed a decision based upon "the preponderance of the evidence," and oral testimony was accepted if it was reasonably substantiated by decent documents. The ATM receipts, for example, and the lifestyle clues.

But gays love to have fancy shoes, even when their nickname isn't "Imelda." I know an 18-year old who just bought patent leather point-toed boots for 2,400 baht (but it was the money he earned by tricks, not bartending, that paid for the boots!). Same with sexy underwear - didn't many of us get those items into our wardrobes without having rented ourselves out?

On some rainy night, you could offer to take him home (Freudian slip there; I first typed "take him off"), since he doesn't have his own transport. The lack of his own m/c suggests struggling student. While he's in the toilet, look around for more clues without being ridiculous.

That's it; be suspicious without being ridiculous.

Enjoy yourself. Are you searching for a 30-year marriage? I thought not.

I'm surprised nobody has mentioned the Dental Hospital on the Superhighway about 1 to 2 km from Rincome Intersection, next to the Medical Hospital (inside frontage road). A little difficult to get to with the construction.

I had excellent results from several extractions and two partial dentures. The old man who started the clinic and trained all the dentists there, studied in Boston at Tufts. The dentures were 3200 baht and 5000 baht, extractions no more than 500 baht. They'll charge about 100 for x-rays, which are a last resort. It's as painless as dentistry can be (I've had over 40 extractions, counting baby teeth). My dentist was always prompt, and the old man took me on an emergency once (extremely difficult extraction, what with the infection I got, but he knew what to do). No complications, no problem with hygience, etc.

Phone number for appoointments: 053-411158. Most of the staff speak decent dental English.

Mr. Mechanic was good to me last year.

You also might ask at Buddy Internet, opposite Central Kad Kaew. They have a good selection and most of the staff speak passable English.

Perhaps the title of this thread is misleading, but I'll go for it.

Non-commercial gay young Thai men, who are looking for a long term partner, are looking for monogamy. The best you'd get would be a wide-open 3-way, which doesn't really happen. The long term lover wants to be the one and only (as in the West).

Money is money. Love is love. They only come together for those who just love money.

As mentioned earlier, I met my long-term present b/f in a gay sauna in Chiang Mai. You could post a personal ad, such as on www.dreadedned.com

I don't agree that all the Thai gay men over 30 have died of AIDS, gone back into the closet, or married a woman. My boyfriend knows lots of like-minded gay Thais who were out of the closet long before age 18. They finished school, found a trade or profession, and have a decent life (never having been barboys, we hope). Most of them want a Thai lover, but some are attracted to Western men. If they're responsible, they only have one day off per week at most, and a little time in the evening. Catch them if you can. But be honest, and force them to tell you the truth.

But maybe I was just lucky, or blessed. You may have to look long and hard.

PeaceBlondie

Why don't you enlighten us more with how you met him, his age etc.

I took the advice of Ijustwannateach and looked in gay venues that weren't full of moneyboys. We met at a health club/sauna. When I told him I lived in the area (not just a tourist), he replied, "Are you looking for a boyfriend?" We quickly discovered that we were totally compatible, looking for the same things: companionship, sex, conversation, living together, etc. I learned that he has been openly gay all his life (he was 35 then), never married (probably never a LTR as we know it), gainfully employed long-term in the same field, respected, good family relationships, self-sufficient, etc. We moved in together, I got a long-term full-time teaching job, he continued to work, we met his family, etc. As "Steven" will attest, my b/f won't win any beauty contests, but he's faithful to me in every way, he really loves me, and many years in the future, he'll probably take care of me in my old age (I'm only 62 now).

However, he doesn't like Guns'n'Roses half as much as I do, and he thinks I drive my Honda CBR way too fast; he's right.

Why don't you go proportional?  Add up both salaries- if his is 60% of the total and yours is 40%, then he pays 60% of the rent and you pay 40%, etc., etc.!  That would be more equal considering the pay differences...

"Steven"

Excellent advice, as usual, from Ijustwannateach. Proportional, you say - okay, let's see how that works. My Thai boyfriend makes less than 7,000 baht per month as a hotel manager. My total income is at least 10 times what my boyfriend earns. So our "proportionality" is something like 91%/9%.

Partly because he and his sisters are supporting their aged mother, I give him a salary that is no more than his fulltime work salary. He helps me in a hundred non-sexual ways. This system has worked for us, for over a year. He knows my teaching salary, but not my pension income or my banking assets. He accepts that he doesn't need to know. No ATM cards, no access to my funds. But his knowledge of Thailand and his domestic services would almost justify what I pay him. So, my real support to him for being my boyfriend comes to less than 3,000 per month. That's the least I can do for someone I love, who faithfully takes care of me like nobody else might.

I like having a bed partner, especially one that spoons with me after we've had our romp in the bed. I love to wake up to the view of the mountain out my bedroom window, and then looking back to see "sweet young thing" still in the bed. But some guys aren't used to a soft bed and an elephant-sized farang shifting around in the bed as if there's an earthquake.

I was raised non-cuddly; it still takes me a while to get cuddly with a new partner. But it's fun. And cheek-kissing for private hellos and good-byes. Holding hands while shopping. Just being able to get right next to another guy with the understanding that the touching means we're boyfriends.

Thanks to Ice Treasure and IJWT, for their excellent comments.

[this is my virgin post on ThaiVisa! how many more virginities can a man lose?]

I owe a big part of my happy life in Chiang Mai, with my long-term Thai lover who's never been a barboy, to a guy named "Ijustwannateach." I took the advice IJWT gave me in April & May 2003, and it works.

The irony is that IJWT hasn't found his long term lover yet, but he's trying. And he's not always "looking in all the wrong places," either.

My boyfriend spent a decade in hotel management, learning English through practice. He's got a real, responsible job; I can visit him at work. We go to his family's home; his sisters stop on the street and wai me. We shop together, hand in hand, in public. I help him a little bit because I resemble Bill Gates to the average Thai, but he could support himself honestly without me, as he formerly did. We have no secrets.

Oh, look, ThaiVisa has a SubComandante Marcos smilie, cool: