chuckacinco

Dear Thaivisa Members,

I would be very grateful if you could give me the names of any art schools or businesses in Bangkok that have art activities that emphasize art skills rather than craft skills for children ages about 4 to 10.

Although art and crafts are related, I'm looking for information for a school or business teaching painting, drawing, and model building (sculpture) as compared to painting a plaster Mickey Mouse if you know what I mean.

Thank you very much. I feel our children don't get enough art. I would very much appreciate your replies.

Chuckacinco

My experience with the City School of the Early Learning Center was very positive. I'm a big fan of the Reggio Emelia inpired approach they use. The teachers were some of the hardest working andmost caring teachers I've ever met.

The facilities and resources speak for themselves. I'm sure you've taken the tour. If you haven't - do it soon.

The only thing I was worried about was how children would make the transition to the larger much more impersonal premium international schools.

I think the the more open-ended project based style of learning they do there has the best benefit for young learners. Other parents may enjoy the more academic memorize and drill style of learning that other schools offer. Of course no school is perfect and most school have a little of each type.

Regardless, I think it's a good school.

chuckacinco

I apologize if this post is too long. Moderators please delete if it's inappropriate.

I also was in a loveless cold marriage. I also had a son to care for. That said, good or bad this is what happened to me and what I did.

I was married to a nice Thai girl. She worked in one of those little beauty shops I'm sure you've seen on the first floor of those cheap Thai apartment buildings. I was in my thirties and she was about my age. I wouldn't describe our relationship as love. I was a drunk and I needed a maid I could sleep with. Before we got married, I made her go to the temple and promise the Buddha she would never ever get pregnant.

I was a drunkard but I paid the bills and I was faithful, not because I was a good husband, but because I was wasted all time. Anyway, she got pregnant. I didn't notice until she started showing. I was going to drag her down to the abortion clinic. I put my hand on her belly and at that exact moment, the baby inside moved. It changed me.

We had a son. Even though I was a drunk, I loved that little boy. I was going to be the father I never had.

The baby took over the bed and our lives. No sex - not that there was much. I was a stranger hardly acknowledged when I came home. I wasn't allowed in her bed so I rented another room next door. The baby ruled. I was a nothing. My wife rarely cooked food for me. Twice a week she'd make a big pot of something. If I was hungry, I scooped out of the big pot and ate it cold. She'd leave the pot outside my front door and I'd take it inside my room like prisoner.

I also took valiums, xanexes, and all the alcohol I could take on. If I wasn't going to get laid or have a wife, I might as well get messed up. Which I did, night after night,day after day but still going to work and paying the bills. I know that I was a drunk but I felt I had to stay to take care of my son even though I know now the only thing I did was pay money. If I left, who would take care of him? What would he eat? Who would pay his school bills? Who would keep the money out of my wife's pocket so that my son could go to a decent school and be taken care of? That all fell on me. That's what I thought at the time.

I got sober. Now I think I've got a chance to be a husband and a father. I blamed myself for my wife's coldness and hostility. I deserved all of the abuse and neglect. I think now I've got a shot. I could something that never existed come true. A year went by and things got bad between us. I couldn't believe it. I'm sober, I thought everything would be okay. My wife started hurting me. She started pinching me, then hitting me, then throwing things at me. Then the knife came out. That was bad.

Despite all this, she wanted another child. She stole my son's education money that I'd saved. She took the gold jewelry out of my desk and sold it. Despite being horny, it really ruins the mood given all this. She kept going on about having another baby.

One night, the knife play which was slashing bravado got serious. She cut me. Not deeply, but slashed across the chest with a carving knife. I still couldn't leave. Who would take care of my son? I didn't know what to do. I just went to bed with the cut across my chest.

In the very early morning of the next day, I finally realized I had to go. By this time my son had started sleeping with me in my room. In that first year of being sober, he wouldn't go to sleep unless I cuddled him. It was like he was trying to get all the love and attention he missed from me the first three years of his life. The knife thing was real though, I had to go.

I remember when I left looking at my son's face. His long lashes, his rumpled hair, his small hands holding on to the covers. I knew I'd never see him again. I'd failed as a father. I was a selfish coward and I hated myself. I left.

I only took a suitcase with a few items. My computer, some CD's, not much. I went to work and I told my boss what happened. He told me to go home and get some clothes. I got back to the apartment in the evening (my boss made me work all day) and everything was gone. Even in my room. Appliances, everything gone.

It was bad for me. No word of where my son was. I kept working. I sometimes wept spontaneously. Something would remind me and I would play the movie in my mind and hate myself. I'd visit toy stores and think of all the toys I should have bought him. I was a mess.

Three very difficult months went by. I stayed sober by the way. Then one day, there was my son playing in front of the place where I worked. I couldn't believe it was really him. I noticed how much he'd grown in just the three months. I bent down to pick him up and held him. I looked at his face and I just wept. He looked at me and said, “Hi, Dad.” I'll never forget it.

I promised I would never ever ask for anything ever again. This was all I wanted, to have my son back.

Everything that I thought I hadn't done, I tried to do. All the time I thought about what if I had another chance, I tried to do it. Everything was great. Then his mother came and picked him up from his school. He disappeared again. My wife offered to give my son to me for a lot of money. Maybe I could get a loan from my relatives? But, I just gave up.

I guess what happened is I just got tired, I just accepted whatever would happen. My plans and manipulations just didn't work. I told my wife she could raise him. She would have to take care of him, I gave up. That was hard to do.

She gave up. The last time she dropped my son off with me, she disappeared.

She would come occasionally and visit him briefly and then leave again. It was hard on my son. I had to remember (and still have to remember) that to me, his mother is a b**** but to him, that's his mom.

My son is thirteen now. When he's naughty and I want scold him I try to remember what is was like without him.

I don't know if there is a point other than it may come to you (mrt) to make a very difficult decision. A real life grown up decision that has very strong consequences. An incredibly high-risk, no guarantee of what's the right thing to do decision.

Staying in a loveless marriage, and more importantly, being treated like dirt is not acceptable in the long term. It may be that you might miss some of your son's growing up, but eventually he will seek you out. Or you will find him. I'm not religious but I think whatever force watches over you, watches over your child, too. Even your awful wife. Things will work out. Make the difficult decision that you know you have to make.

The best way to win is not play. Accept the consequences and do the best you can. I really believe things will work out. Your story in not uncommon.

I wish you the very best luck.

chuckacino

My wife had our baby 6 months ago and since this time we have had only one intimate encounter together (but i had more enjoyment than she did, she just wanted to get it over with). I understand that hormones are rebounding from the pregnancy and the fact that she is still breast feeding has something to do with it, but what is normal? I can't go on like this in a loveless sexless marriage, however I must for the sake of my little boy. Does anyone have any suggestions on how to seduce a postpartum woman into doing things that came so natural before? I always thought that a child brings a family closer together rather than tear it apart. Do I just wait this one out or what?

First turn off the pressure (if any) for sex. Then talk to her. She's certainly no dummy and recognizes a problem here. Gently ask her leading questions, like "Are you happy honey?" to help her open up. Ask her what she believes a solution might be. Try to develop a plan together. If she is unresponsive, you likely have a major issue to confront.

"I always thought that a child brings a family closer together rather than tear it apart." This statement worries me, possibly suggesting problems in the marriage prior to the baby's arrival. A baby may or may not bring a family closer together - depends largely on both of you striving to obtain that result. A new baby brings new challenges to the healthiest of marriages.

Be cool. Good luck!

My pleasure to help.

Regarding great literature or art "de gustibas non disputandum est" (there is no disputing about taste).

Anyone who has studied persuasive writing or persuasive anything knows taste can never be argued successfully but it's fun seeing people have a go.

Regarding Shakespeare, I'm waiting for someone to write Romeo and Juliet in Bargirl "Romeo, Romeo. Where you go?"

chuckacinco

I teach English language literature at an IB (International Baccalaureate) school in Bangkok.

There has been a recent move for IB schools to offer an equivalent Thai literature course of study. There are of course literature studies in French, Spanish and every other major language.

Attached are the IB selections of works that Professor Chusak Pattarakulvanit from Thammasat and other Thai teachers have chosen as a course of study if students elect to study Thai Literature at the diploma level. It's in Thai and you might need to change your computer to Thai language to read the .pdf file.

Perhaps this will be helpful in answering which great Thai literary works need to be studied on par with the traditional English language equivalent.

chuckacinco

ThaiLiteratureIB.pdf

Thank You

I'll go to Fed Ex and ask for more specific information there.

Thank You again

chuckacinco

Could anyone advise me how to mail a gold bracelet worth less than $1000 to the US securely? I did a search and couldn't find the answer. Thank you for your time.

Thank You

Chuckacinco

Thank You Everyone

Chuckacinco

Hi

I need to buy a washing machine and an oven. Where should I go in Bangkok where the price and service are good.

Thank You Thaivisa Members

Chuckacinco

Hi J.

My wife and I didn't want something boring and traditional.

We shopped around at the various hotels and were surprised at the variety and the range of costs. We went to many of the wedding service places that are dotted all over bangkok. There's a ton of them around Thong Lo. I could have been costumed as a Chinese warlord and my wife could have been a white-wigged French countess - mole and all. It was a riot. It really made me aware of what a wedding is all about.

Anyway, we ended up using the Reflections Hotel near the Ari skytrain station. You can google them for more information. It's a funky art-boutique hotel.

Our wedding was more like a really cool party. We arranged alot of the things for ourselves such as the flowers, decorations, and wedding gifts. We bought her dress at Siam Square. I bought a nice suit at Central. We did alot of things ourselves before the wedding. That might not be an option for you.

We had about 150 guests with a full dinner buffet (Mostly Thai food).

It definitely wasn't a hi-society wedding and had no pretentions of trying to be. That freed us to enjoy our wedding with all the other guests.

It wasn't easy for us to do this. We are both strong-willed and want our own way. In the end - it was the greatest ever.

By the way, the traditional Thai wedding with the monks we did in the morning at the monk hospital. It was fantastic. They took care of almost everything. We rented her traditional Thai dress.

Congratulations

C.

30. That breakfast tastes so good.

31. Not having to listen to Thai people say "Khon Kee Mao" when referring to me.

32. Not taking unscheduled naps in wierd areas of Bangkok.

You're a middle aged man with Winnie the Pooh pillow cases and 101 Dalmation bedsheets.

You look forward to getting the laundry back because the missus really likes the Garfield sheets.

You have hundreds of stupid coffee cups that you've given up trying to convince the family to throw away.

When setting the dinner table it doesn't seem strange to see that any dining table item has no relation to any other item. Each knife, plate, glass etc. is unique.

Just wanted to put in my 2 Baht worth

I'm a schoolteacher in Bangkok. I've taught at various schools in the 16 years I've been here. I have worked with many teachers, some without degrees; also, teachers that have degrees in Education and degrees in other subjects. It begs generalizations but anyone with any kind of education knows the quality of generalizations (even this one lol).

The first post seemed to me to ask, “Can I stay in Thailand and teach?” I have to answer in my own experience that yes you can. As was stated before, there is a native speaker shortage in Thailand or rather a shortage of native speakers willing to work for 25 to 40 Baht a month. Keep applying and a school with some push will get you a work permit. I think that is the main concern of the OP. The blacklisting thing is a something I've heard about but never, never seen.

I have a Masters Degree in Education. I have to say that I have been equally as pleased as horrified watching teachers with various backgrounds do what they do in the classroom. If I were to give advice it would be to get a degree in Education and just accept the price of being a teacher. Of course, you can work here while you pursue this if that's what you want to do.

The popularity of credentialing is a worldwide phenomenon whether we accept it or not. In my opinion, eventually you will have to go legit or be damned to backwater shadowy for profit schools filled with teachers who probably shouldn't be teaching. If you are really good at teaching, being a hero teacher at a crappy school might be dramatically appealing. However, by this time you might have a family and it should be your duty to provide for them in a manner befitting a man of your intelligence and experience.

I got my Masters Degree here in Thailand from an American university. They flew the professors here for summer classes over the course of three years. I bitched the whole time to anyone who would listen about the expense and the waste of my valuable time. In the end, I learned to be the teacher, I think, that I always wanted to be.

In my heart, my reservations about getting properly credentialed were because I was afraid that I was stupid or was going to be made to feel stupid by taking graduate level courses. That I was selfish about spending my life savings on education rather than what I really wanted which was a fantasy collection of computer equipment, large screen TVs, and vacations on the beach.

In the end, I decided to grow up and do the right thing. Dave, I wish you luck.

I've been lurking about tv and I enjoy reading some of the posts.

I'm also a parent. I didn't meet my son's mother through the best circumstances.

I want to say why the fixation with the brutal truth to a young child? Be truthful in the big things, like doing the things that you want your children to do. Not telling them to do things and you do something else.

Keep all of your promises no matter how small. If you say you are going to give them something or take them somewhere you have to do it. Period.

When my son asked me, I could have told a story similar to the OP.

Instead, I made up a tale that was pretty much like a cinderella tale. "Your mother was the most beautiful girl there...", "Our eyes met...".

And you tell the tale this way because your child in their egocentric view of the world are getting all the positive associations with their mom which as a husband, you will never understand. To you, your wife is well, your wife. To your children, their mother is much much more.

Just like being a father. Whether you like it or not, you are their hero. When they are old enough to figure our that you are a flawed mortal, they'll know enough already.

I had to leave my son's mother because she tried to cut me because I didn't give her the money she wanted. I took my son and raised him myself.

He was 3 then, he's 10 now.

He sees his mom every 3 or 4 months if she feels like it.

I couldn't explain in a fairy tale why I had to leave. I just said we didn't love each other anymore but we were still "friends." I don't volunteer information because there is alot more to talk about to your child than this stuff.

He's older now and I haven't asked him his opinion of his mother. I don't volunteer mine.

Just my two baht. I felt like participating.

Thanks for the first hand information. Fascinating.

Does anyone know how they take the tractor motor and turn it into a wierd kind of truck (an E-Tahn)?

Just wondering.

Why not the simple things that are hard to get here that are cheap in Italy?

Impress your "new" family with something that shows more thought than how much it costs unless that is what you are all about.

Good olive oil in a beautiful bottle is good for show even if they don't like or appreciate olive oil.

Every Mom loves sweets. Biscotti from your own neighborhood or some that your own family made. Unusual nuts like walnuts, pecans or pine nuts. Unusual chocolates from Italy or a nearby European country. The kind you or your family like - not necessarily the most expensive.

Minced sweet basil preserved in olive oil for pesto. Preserved peppers. Better if you made it yourself or your family made it.

Why don't you pick up some fresh bakery stuff right before your plane takes off so that it is still soft and almost warm from the oven.

Just my ten Baht worth. Good luck.

chuckacinco

Chuckacinco

Thank You all so much.

I live in Bangkok. Off to Chinatown. Thank you, again.

Chuckacinco

Dear Thaivisa members,

My 10 year old son impatiently plugged in a US battery charger for one of his favorite toys in Thai current. The charger is for the special battery that goes in the toy. The charger doesn't work now. Where can I get this charger re-wired? Any experience or advice?

Thank You

Chuckacinco