M12MKD

Probably for the same reason that some nationalities come to Britain. The benefits they get suits their needs.

Why does anyone go to another country...because they think it's a better life for them.

Simple really.

I'll bite on this thread......life is interesting. when young, most of us have spent thousands on girlfriends and that is just part of life. sometimes i have regretted "wasting money" but it's an experience. you live and you learn. you can recover financially and odds are you won't marry this lady, but no worries. if you want to be financially responsible but have less life lessons and experiences, well then move on. if you feel like you are being exploited, get out. it's all about gut feelings with women, and i think you know what you are comfortable doing. wait until the time comes when they want kids that cost $1,000,000 USD, a house, and weekly toys.....

HAve to agree I've spent far more and lost more with a "trustful" (I use the word losely) UK girl. In fact most have been less faithful and ripped me off.

This isn't a Thai thing it's a woman thing IMHO

Is there any right or wrong answer. Surely it's a gut choice.

Did I pay for my gfs flight ticket? Yes I did. Would I do it again? Yes I would. Does she not pay for anything? No, but all her earnings go into "our" (mine) and I pay out from that.

So even though yes I pay for everything we technical share and split the costs.

If you want to be cold about it treat it like a business and only invest what you are willing to lose.

Lol, I think you got the wrong impression.
 
She wanted your fb not to add you or accept your invite. But to be able to block you, so any of her contacts would never know her connection with you.

Never actually thought of that, makes sense I guess

Thanks chaps. Bit gutted and numb at the moment.

But yes better late than never

I get and agree with all your points.

Firstly yes hands up the title is incorrect, I'm on my phone whilst dare I say it at work. I should have rechecked the auto corrects but I was rushing. Lesson learnt, take a moment to check.

Yes I take on board and agree with most that has been said.

No she has no tattoos, nor is she a bar girl in fact she had a very good job in Thailand and well respected.

Yes I understand the overbearing dad, I truly get that but there are other men on her Facebook which are European.

Yes I've seen her Facebook briefly when she was on it. Yes she has over 600 friends and over 1000's of pictures.

Yes I've snooped a bit online and found a few pictures, I won't go into details as I'm sure I'll get a lot of piss take. But needless to say I've asked a question which would explain it but she clear said that she has never been or done that.

Up until recently I've trusted her 100% made allowances for my gut due to her culture, but recently my trust of her has started to drop.

If I confront her or ask questions it all gets blown out of control and she over explains things.

I'm trying to wall a thin line between being understanding of her cultural background and my gut feeling she's lying through her arse.

 
go with the latter, dude. My gut feel is that she's been pulling train up and down the Old Malay Peninsula for a period of years. Lots of men of the honkish persuasion on her FB but you can't be one? Really?

 

Yep funny that, I must be a different sort of European guy!

Anyway it's done now. Thanks for the input all.

Yep seems like you're all right. When confronted well she's no longer living with me. Looks like she's got another dumb European to go to.

Lesson learnt the hard way.

Obviously this is an issue or you wouldn't have posted. 
 
Tell her to delete her Facebook account, it's bothering you. 
 
Relationships are hard enough without the inanity of Facebook being involved...jeesh. 

I agree I know a few friends and a family member have broken down due to Facebook cheating.

Personally I use mine for contact with family in other parts of the country and long standing friends that have moved away.

I've got maybe a 10th of what she has in friends.

I guess the first sign was oh they are all friends I know them all (yes it smelt of bullshit at the time) to oh they are friends from a game I used to play on Facebook.

I guess lying comes naturally to some people.

Obviously this is an issue or you wouldn't have posted. 
 
Tell her to delete her Facebook account, it's bothering you. 
 
Relationships are hard enough without the inanity of Facebook being involved...jeesh. 

I agree I know a few friends and a family member have broken down due to Facebook cheating.

Personally I use mine for contact with family in other parts of the country and long standing friends that have moved away.

I've got maybe a 10th of what she has in friends.

I guess the first sign was oh they are all friends I know them all (yes it smelt of bullshit at the time) to oh they are friends from a game I used to play on Facebook.

I guess lying comes naturally to some people.

she says as I've not met them for obvious reasons.   What are the obvious reasons? Are you black and she is white. Do you only have one leg. What is obvious to you may not be obvious to a reader. Perhaps you are a policeman and her family are all criminals. 
 
How can other readers respond without knowing the OBVIOUS reasons ? 

Meeting the parents means you are getting married or intend to soon.....that reason

I get and agree with all your points.

Firstly yes hands up the title is incorrect, I'm on my phone whilst dare I say it at work. I should have rechecked the auto corrects but I was rushing. Lesson learnt, take a moment to check.

Yes I take on board and agree with most that has been said.

No she has no tattoos, nor is she a bar girl in fact she had a very good job in Thailand and well respected.

Yes I understand the overbearing dad, I truly get that but there are other men on her Facebook which are European.

Yes I've seen her Facebook briefly when she was on it. Yes she has over 600 friends and over 1000's of pictures.

Yes I've snooped a bit online and found a few pictures, I won't go into details as I'm sure I'll get a lot of piss take. But needless to say I've asked a question which would explain it but she clear said that she has never been or done that.

Up until recently I've trusted her 100% made allowances for my gut due to her culture, but recently my trust of her has started to drop.

If I confront her or ask questions it all gets blown out of control and she over explains things.

I'm trying to wall a thin line between being understanding of her cultural background and my gut feeling she's lying through her arse.

At least this has made me chuckle.

Cheers

Just be careful mate. Check it out, sounds like she's up to no good.

Now you'll just have to listen to the pish taking in here

I expected as much on both counts. The phish taking and the no good.

I'll take the advice on board and we'll join the club haha

At least this has made me chuckle.

Cheers

Thanks and sorry for placing in the wrong place I will ask a mod to delete this thread.

Before I start this is not a Thai girl/lady bashing as my question could relate to a woman from any country.

I've been with my lady for 9 months now, we get on very well and she's told her parents about me, or so she says as I've not met them for obvious reasons.

I trust her yet I've this gut feeling something is not 100% right.

When we started dating she asked me if I was on Facebook to which I said yes. She asked can I add her to which I said yes of course.

Yet up until today she's never accepted the request.

I've spoken to her about this and she states it won't let her accept me as a friend. At first I accepted this because she said her account has been hacked etc.

So when she went back to Thailand she said that she would sort it out.

Then came other excuses such as I don't want my family to see you. Which I accepted as at that point only her sister, brother and mother knew about me, Dad couldn't know.

6 months later she's back in the UK. She said that she would add once back in the UK because her dad wouldn't be able to question her.

So far nothing. Now don't get me wrong I don't think Facebook is overly important in life but what concerns me is the fact she hides and makes up reason's why she cannot add me,after all it was her that wanted my Facebook in the first place.

I'm not being childish about this but it's just a little weird from what I'm used to . I've had and friends have had their gf or bf on their Facebook. Only one's that haven't have been because they are "players".

If she never asked in the first place then I probably wouldn't be as bothered. She even said I'll set up a new Facebook for us to share.

We also currently live together at the moment.

So I guess from a thai lady point of view is this normal? I ask because my female and male uk friends are starting to get suspicious of her and getting a bit pprotective due to my previous partner.

Any input would be appreciated that's not bias from my friend's.

Sorry if this is in the wrong place.

In my experience if a female has made up her mind to do something there is little you can do.

I take it you've actually talked about your concerns with her health and the effect on the relationship.

My other half is just as reluctant and works way too many hours for average pay.

I guess it depends on where you both want the relationship to go as you how you approach the issue

Sex 2-4 times a night!?

I'd be luck if I'd get it that many times a month.

I'm not jealous in the least bit, I mean how do you keep going that many times? I feel sorry for you, she sounds very demanding.

*disclaimer: above comment is in jest with tongue firmly placed in ones cheek.

For what it's worth. Being in the same country doesn't stop it. I'm not just talking about Thai's. 2 of my uk partners have been banging someone behide my back.

Why because mostly they thought the bloke was a better deal.

Is my thai gf cheating on me? I didn't think so but now after this thread it's a guarantee that she is.......if you believe everything you read that is.

My gf has a few female friends that have Farrang husbands or bfs all seem happy when I've met them.

Still it's always a good chuckle to read posts like this.

Sick<deleted>. Really this sort of thing regardless of the country makes me feel sick

20k is only £400, which is not a vast amount. Though I wouldn't walk about with that much in my pocket.

I'm sure she will learn her lesson......they all do right? (Women in general not just Thai women)

Cheapest way would be via Italian tune up. As above give it a bit of a rag through the gears.

Also apart from the above reasons it could be caused by heatsoak. If the air is hot coming in its not as dense which can cause the TDi to burn more fuel. Which equalsblack smoke.

I take it there is no loss in power? damaged boost pipes can also cause this issue.

I would have thought if it's got a dpf you would have had warning lights to say there is a problem. Also at 8 years old I think its probably pre dpf, though my knowledge is based on uk cars most did not have until 2008.

When was the fuel filter last changed?

I've read a lot of comments and the point being made about farang and as much as I agree with the fact that this is a racist comment we should all realise that ONLY white people can be racist.

So I think the best thing to do is scrap our language and adopt one that will not cause offence to anyone.

There is plenty of examples on the tv of open racism towards white people but no one ever makes an issue of that.

I accept that even though for example "farang" is racist it's part of the culture so I accept it. Does it bother me? Do I loose sleep over it? No because if that's someone's choice to be racist towards me then that's their problem not mine.

I think the problem is the attitude. I'm entitled so I should have it.

it shouldn't be an entitlement, or its your right to have it.

Sadly I work within the benefit umbrella, it's a joke and makes me sick the attitude of a lot of the people.

It's a way of life and for most are better off than myself.

still at least my taxes are being well spent

Been here for nearly two weeks. Its fine. Maybe slightly more traffic so allow extra time to travel.

As above avoid the mob areas (though when I've stumbled on them it's been peaceful and fine).

The UKBA website wont tell you why her visa was refused; you need the actual refusal notice for that.

As ThaiVisaExpress said in the other topic, obtaining a duplicate refusal notice is possible; but I'm not sure if that is still the case after this amount of time

.

Sorry, I meant from what the agency has told my gf it relates to something I read on the UKBA's website, but again I possible may have misunderstood the wording, sadly I cannot find it again to quote this

Again, as TVE said in the other topic, if she is applying for a student visa under the PBS then there is no minimum time she needs to have been out of the UK.

Ditto if she was in the UK under the PBS, returned to Thailand and then applied to come back as a visitor. Many students do this because their course has finished, they've returned home and then want to come back for their graduation or some other reason.

What was her original visa; a student visa under the PBS or a student visitor? What visa did she apply for in December; student visitor, general visitor or something else?

I wish I could fully answer this one, as for as I'm aware it was the same type of visa as before, in other words they just reapplied using the same reason and information as the first student Visa. It was a general visa which does not allow you to work unlike the tier 4 visa tat allows up to 20 hours a week. Again this is from what I've been told and read on the UKBA's website. So I think is was a student visting Visa originally and then reapplied as the same in December.

I think maybe taking up TVE's offer might be the way forward. Either way without the extra information I understand that its not possible to best advice further. I will see what extra information I can get when she comes "home" from work today.

Thanks again

Mike