sylvafern

If you're stopping off in Bangkok, Oakwood serviced apartments (& hotel) are pet friendly.

Perhaps you could contact some individual resorts in Phuket to find out about staying with pets. I had a friend who used to take her two cats with her to Samui everytime she went on holiday and when she finally left the country, the resort owners adopted them!

If you're coming from Alaska to Thailand ... are you not worried that your cats will suffer from the change in climate and the heat here? Just something to think about .... electricity bills will be through the roof if you're planning on letting them stay in air-con all day!

Soi Dog rescue also look after cats and have an adoption program for both cats and dogs so you may be able to donate your food and when your ready for a new cat, you may be able to find one there. Their website is www.soidogrescue.org ... it's run by a forign lady and I'm sure she would really appreciate the donation as she often ends up paying for things out of her own pocket.

Hi Stretchy .... I'm not sure if you're male or female but yes, it's true that your wife/husband if not working in Bangkok may have problems adjusting. Difficult to say without knowing more about you though, as there are things like mother's and babies groups (Bambi) and expat women's groups, etc so depending on their personality they may find a circle of friends if willing to put a bit of effort in. If your spouse is a teacher, it wouldn't be as bad because, even if they didn't have a contract at your school, it's likely they could get supply or support work.

As far as greenery goes, that also depends on where the school is located. I'm in the outskirts of the city and there are big green areas around the school and I live in a housing estate with a few small parks and play areas. However, if your school is in the inner city area, then expect to be living in a built up area, quite likely in an apartment block or condominium ... but then again, depending on which school it is some accomodation provided is in buildings with big play areas and parks.

Bangkok is definately not for everyone, however most people enjoy it if even for just a short stint. It's unlikely that any international school would offer you a contract for less than two years, so that would pretty much be your minimum length of stay. I've been in Thailand almost 8 years ... the last seven of them in Bangkok, so it can't be that bad!

If you'd like to know more, feel free to PM me with the name of the school you've been offered the job at and I may be able to give you more information about where you'd be living and the lifestyle.

Aussie visa was a breeze to get for my Thai b/f last July. Didn't question anything and got it within four days.

That is good news! Will just keep my fingers crossed and hope for the best..... he's going to apply at the aussie visa application centre in bangkok (it is seperate from the embassy), anybody know how the initial appliaction process takes? will he just drop of the mound of paperwork and leave them with it, or will he need to hang around and answer questions for a while?

We spent ages filling in the forms downloaded from the internet but when my b/f went to drop them off he had to fill in different ones because apparently the ones on the internet were wrong (??). Just filled them in on the spot, paid the fee plus a small amount (300 baht?) to have them delivered to our house on the other side of bangkok. By the way, I've learnt that it can be easier to get a Visa without mentioning you will be staying with family .... way more paperwork to fill in if they have a 'sponsor'. When we went to Australia we said we were staying in hotels in Sydney and didn't mention the fact we were also staying with my father in Adelaide.

Aussie visa was a breeze to get for my Thai b/f last July. Didn't question anything and got it within four days. However he'd already been to NZ once so had 'proven' he could abide by visa regulations and return to Thailand. However, in saying that, the NZ embassy was almost as difficult the second time round as the first and still needed lots of paperwork..... like meme's hoping for with the Canada/US visa, it may have been because we got the NZ one first that the aussie one was approved.

First time we went to NZ we had been together 2 years + and did have a lot of the stuff required (same sorts of things that have already been mentioned) and it was still really difficult to get the visa .... took about 6 weeks to get approved and only after a lot of paperwork, questioning and even a hefty 'bond' was paid. Even after having a child together it still took several weeks and a lot of 'proof' of our relationship before the visa was approved for our second NZ trip!

What type of work do you do? It is possible to earn good money in Thailand but only in certain professions ... e.g. teaching (international school), hotel management, etc.

Hi Swissmiss,

I have an American friend who took her Thai boyfriend back to the states to live with her. He went in on a fiancee visa an d got married within the three months. However, they were already engaged and had been living together for years before hand so it wasn't really an issue. He was also an engineer sending money to his family and found it really difficult in the States at first as he wasn't able to find work for a long time. He got depressed about this but eventually found work in a Thai restautant (proved impossible to find work in his feild) and joined a Sepak Takraw team (Thai national sport) and now represents the US in international events! As far as I know he's really happy now, but I would say it took at least 6 months for him to feel settled. If you do go down the track of taking your man to the States with you, do expect for there to be some culture shocks and difficulties settling in. However, right now it seems as if that should be something you should be thinking about for the future - at least several years into the future I would think. Even if you feel it's the right thing for you to do now, I think you would have a pretty hard time getting visas. My friends had to go through a tough application process which included seperate interviews and months of waiting before they found out if he could get the visa. It is probably only because they knew each other very well and had been living together for a long time that they passed the application.

By the way, although your guy seems poor to you, in Thai terms, as an engineer, he probably earns a reasonable salary compared to most.

Chatuchak is definately one of the best places and worth a trip, but if you're also looking for a bit more of an 'upmarket' shopping experience, you should try Central Chitlom Department store (on the sky train route). Lovely place (with a great food center on the top floor), but can be expensive (has good sales though). Also Narayapan (sp?) around the corner opposite central World Plaza is items which can be bargained. The night market (Suan Lom) near Lumpini Park is also very nice. Slightly more upmarket than Chatuchak, but prices are still pretty cheap.

Do you have experience at breeding St Bernards? If so, then I guess you know what you are doing, but if not I think you will find there is a lot more to it than you think.

If you are seriously interested and willing to research the background of the dog and ensure that they are of quality breeding (which many are not) then look at pantipmarket.com (in thai) which often has stud dogs listed from all breeds. Beware that many are probably just people trying to make some quick money and there is every chance that you could have future problems if the dogs are not bred well. I personally wouldn't want to risk it. I used to have a male st bernard that had medical problems which I suspect were from breeding even though he had a pedigree ... I had to re-home him but before I did I had him neutered so that there would be no chance of the bad traits continuing.

Just read your post again and noticed that you were also thinking of buying a male pup... are you aware that males can not be bred for quite a long time (24 months, I think) and if they are bred before this time the pups will not get a pedigree. Do a search on the internet about breeding and you will find that this is the wrong way to go about it. Also, what do you plan to do with the puppies? Have you thought about the type of home they might go to as I suspect that often they go to homes where they really shouldn't be going to.

I found sterilizing tablets from Boots (not available from Boots here) best for the bottles and the a small and easy to take anywhere when travelling.

Although you won't need them for a while, I can not seem to find bibs anywhere (except little tiny ones that hardly do the job).

I also found baby clothes really expensive here and didn't want to fork out so much for something that would only be worn for a short time. My mother, who was in the UK at the time, sent heaps of good quality, cheap strtchy body suits and t-shirt and shorts sets that she got from places like Woolworths. (one cheap brand here that I found was quite good was Auka (sp?) from Lotus).

Wasn't aware of the plastics issue with the bottles (and I thought I'd read up heaps about babies) but being a first time mother I went for the best available and spent a fortune on Avent bottles which my son hated ... the only ones he liked are an 'ergonomically friendly' brand called Natur available cheaply from Lotus.

The biggest thing I have had a problem with is a pushchair ... I've had two, one of them a cheapie at 3000 baht which fell apart after I washed the cover and another that was 10,000 baht on sale that I still use but am desperate to replace as it has become warped with time and my son has totally out-grown it, however I can not find anything that is decent enough quality for a reasonable price and is big enough for him to lie down when sleeping (all the pushchairs here seem to have really short backs to them). He's 17 months old now, but I would say he outgrew it at least 5-6 months ago. If I have another child this is the one thing I would definitely get back home (in NZ) as the choice there is way better and cheaper for the same sort of thing.

I have a good heart, and was just trying to learn about the Thai culture more, since there is obviously going to be a difference in Thailand relationship style, then in (all I know of) American relationships.

Why is this obvious? I would venture that the nuts and bolts of male-female relationships are similar the world over. And why do you assume that the 'relationship style' will be Thai and not American? Perhaps your man, as he has moved to the States and lived there for 4 years, is more into an American-style relationship.

Anytime there's ever been a 'problem' in my relationship it's usually a male-female thing, sometimes a language mis-communication, but rarely a cultural thing .... if my b/f has done something that annoyed or upset me and I talk about it with farang friends who have farang boyfriends or husbands they nearly always reassure me that they've also experienced something similar and it's a male-female thing rather than cultural. Any type of relationship is always going to have its ups and downs. 'Luvin' should enjoy the honeymoon phase and take things as they come ... what's meant to be is meant to be ..... I hope you do let us know how things are going further down the track.

And maigo6 - obviously you didn't read seonai's post ... your comment is gross and not something I want to read in the ladies forum. Totally uneccessary.

Thanks Seraph ... good to get another point of view!

I have never seen a Thai child getting attention the way a farang child gets when out in public. Whenever we take kids on school trips it is ONLY the farang kids or very pale half-Thai children that get the attention (i.e. - the grabs, pinches, hugs). Not that anything bad has ever happened on any of these trips, but it is proof that Thai kids do not get the same attention as farang kids.

farang ... New Zealander .... living in thailand for 8 years ... with Thai b/f for 6 years and have a son who's almost a year and a half. Work at an int'l school ... plan to be here for quite a few more years.

I think it's been said in another thread somewhere, but often it's the negative stories that get talked about most. I know lots of people in good long term relationships with thai guys so I never worry about the negative things people say ... most likely they are stories based on true experiences but it's not the same for everyone. I'm not sure, but I think some of the negative stories may have something to do with the type of guy and where they met. Would others agree that guys met in beach bars often are the ones that cause the negative stories? One of the first Thai guys I saw I met in a beach bar in Samui. He came to visit me in Bangkok and by the end of the week I had an inkling that he was after the easy life with the 'rich' farang. When he got back to Samui he called saying he'd had a motorbike accident and needed me to deposit money in his account and proceeded to rattle off the account number! What cheek! However, my boyfriend (and father of our child) and I have been together for about 6 years and we have a pretty normal relationship. He was also like your man and knew from a very early stage that I was 'the one'. He is also from Samui but wasn't a bar boy and we met in a place frequented by Thais, not tourists. He also likes to pay for things (see ettiquette thread) and would hate it if people thought that he was just with a farang 'for the money'. I think that because you met your guy out of Thailand a lot of things will be different. Expect to have a lot of cultural differences, especially as you probably don't have an insight into the 'Thai way' like many people who are already residing in the country when they meet their partners.

I have a golden retriever who is fantastic with my 17 month old ... however she's about 4 years old so I don't know what she would have been like with him as a pup. Ever since my son's been able to crawl she's let him crawl and climb all over her and always runs up to when we get home after a day out ... definately a good family pet. She barks at strangers at the gate, but doesn't bark any other time. She is also very smoochy with the cat! We also have a shih tzu puppy and it's true what someone said earlier - puppies do jump up and try to play and my son was quite frightened of it at first. However, after a couple of weeks he loved the pup and plays with it constantly. We do after put the pup in another room sometimes, especially when my son has his mind on doing something else and the pup keeps wanting to play.

If you are interested in adopting a soi dog, you should have a look at the soi dog rescue site. They have a clinic out in the middle of nowhere in Bangna and you can go and look at the pups (and kittens as well, I think) that are up for adoption. I went and had a look just before we got our puppy and would have gone through with it but my partner was desperate for a shitzu.

Could have been that, but I'm not sure. Definately had similar symptoms but it was in his hind leg (and the article just mentioned fore legs).

But you're right ... it's hard to know if any vets in Thailand could do the surgery. Maybe it would be worth going to the vet school at Kasetsart University which is where I went one of the times ... insist on getting thru to one of the heads of the department ... maybe being a university might mean that they are more up with research on different conditions.

Good luck.

I would much rather have my child grow up here, with all the above than in the UK where this doesnt happen but actually my child would be in more danger.

I agree that threat of violence is more obvious in the UK but I can think of pros and cons for either place. One of our kids is disabled and sadly there's is no contest about which country is a better place for us to raise him re: services, his education, financial help etc

That's not to say I would definitely have chosen the UK as a place to bring up kids if things had been different. Like I said everywhere has good and bad.

Interestingly in the light of the recent murder on Samui one of the daytime phone in programmes in the UK ran a phone in on an 'is it safe to let our children go backpacking in Thailand' theme. Of course most people phoning in were saying that things need to be put in perspective but some were saying it had put them off.

There was also a piece in the news that the FO had played down the fact that 9 Brits had been murdered in Thailand in the last 18 months. I know murder of tourists is off topic but I think it's easy to fall into the trap of thinking Thailand is a safer place because of the lack of violent attacks such as muggings. Like anywhere in the world it has it's fair share of unpleasant going ons.

That's exactly true .... often living in Thailand does seem like a safer place to live and people let their guards down ... since living in Thailand I've been broken into, someone tried to mug me and for the first few Songkrans was gropped by drunken idiots in public places .... but in saying that in some cases I put myself in position that I never would have done had I been back home in NZ (e.g. I was walking home from the skytrain by myself at midnight when the attempted mugging took place - never would have walked alone at that time of night in NZ).

I think it's important to remember all those things our parents and teachers taught us as kids, and I know it is the fact that 'stranger danger' was drummed into me from an early age that makes me wary of the attention my son gets from strangers here. Unfortunately the 'give an inch, take a mile' attitude is in place here .... I had the same experience that SBK had, but at Aytthaya - a polite Thai Uni student asked to take a photo of my son (this was my first experience) so I said yes .... next thing you know he was swarmed by students all with their massive SLR cameras inches from him face!

When I am buying something and my wife is there, I always tell her to go elsewhere. I can always get a better price than her. She doesn't want to appear stingy, whereas i don't give a ****.

So true! Thai are really bad at bargaining, and so easy to get a better price than any of them, in their own country!

My Thai b/f bargained 50,000 baht off the price of our car when I bought it but I managed to get an extra 20,000 baht off when he was too embarrassed to ask for more!!! Same with everything, they won't sell if they're not making a profit and you can always tell when you've reached their lowest price.

Didn't know til recently tho, that prices in places like Homepro are also negotiable .... finally decided to splash out on a soft matress (after years of backache from the hard as rocks matresses preffered here). Matress on sale for 39,999 (down from 69,000) but still too expensive so walked away. Suddenly realised sales person was following us and muttering something quietly in Thai ... got the idea he was trying to negotiate the price so got b/f to talk to him and eventually got the matress for 32,000 with free duvet, sheet set and pillows thrown in. Never would have thought to bargain in a shop like that until had this experience.

Are you guys trying to find a politically-correct answer? Is that the point of this topic?

I think if you asked any Thai person here why farangs come to Thailand, they would all give the same obvious answer. While I don't particularly like the rationale, I have nothing personally against the farangs who come here to look for women. As they say - don't hate the player, hate the game.

BOCTAOE (this is an acronym by cartoonist Scott Adams that means "but of course there are obvious exceptions" as someone will inevitably point to a minority segment of the population in order to prove me wrong. Yes I know there are people here for work too, although many will inevitably marry a Thai woman. And I definitely welcome more of the farangs that create jobs for Thai people).

You're making the assumption that all farangs that come here are men .... where I work 50% of us are female and we definately didn't come for the reasons you are implying is the general belief of Thai people (which I highly doubt is really the belief). And I doubt that the other 50% that are male did either. A lot of people that come here come for work, and those that choose to stay do so because of the work or the easy lifestyle (maids and all that) and the generally cheap living costs ... and for some because they meet their g/f, b/f, wife, husband.

Renting houses with pets is no problem ... it's rare that people won't allow pets. Finding places to rent is easy, so I also recommend you do it from here ... main reason being that the advertised price is rarely the price you end up paying ... I've lived in about 10 places and have bargained a good few thousand a month off all. The place I'm in now we found on a Sunday and moved in the following Saturday and that includes getting movers in to pack everything (and there was a lot!) all in such a short space of time, so you needn't worry about finding somewhere before you come. Don't know about the places you're looking at but, in Bangkok, Oakwood (which has hotel rooms and apartments search on internet and you will find it) allows pets so it could be a place to stay while you're looking for permanant accomodation.

I have a golden and have never had a problem with her, luckily but I used to have a St Bernard that started limping as a puppy. We didn't worry too much for a couple of weeks as it wasn't major and thought it would fix itself but soon we started noticing that joint in his leg (his knee, if that's what it's called in dogs) was starting to stick out a bit and the joint seemed loose. That was the start of an ongoing battle with his leg which eventually led us to rehome him when he was about two as we were unable to take care of him as well as a newborn. We went to many vets, including the Vet hopital at Kasetsart University and every vert told us it was caused by him walking on slipperly surfaces (e.g. our paved driveyway and the marble floors in our house). One vet told us that he stretched his ligament. For several months we had to keep a splint on his leg which needed rebandaging every day. Even so, the splint led to sores and wounds that easily became infected. He also had to take a dietry supplement with his food that added up to about 2000 baht a month by the time he reached full weight. After the splint came off we had to restrict his movement - he was not allowed to run which was impossible to control with our other two dogs always wanting to play. We had to keep him indoors or tied up which he hated. Eventually we decided to rehome him and w, very carefully, selected a couple that lived next to a doggie physio therapy place where they could take him swimming every day which was the only thing the vets every said would help improve it. he was pedigree from a breeder but I'm not convinced that the condition wasn't caused by bad breeding (the breeder denied this).

I think you have every right to be concerned and even if this vet has been recommended, I suggest you take your pup somewhere else for a second opinion. I'm not sure what it's like now as I haven't been there for a couple of years, but the Vet's on the soi that runs between Tonglor and Ekamai (Tonglor Soi 10 or 12 - there's a big wedding shop on the corner) used to be very good.

LOL. That made me laugh! At the school I worked in the first lesson of the day was 7.50 am. All the mums would be dropping off their kids at 7.30 am dressed in cocktail dresses.

You start to feel underdressed. So when in Rome.....

That sounds very much like the school I work in! Cocktail dresses, shiny clothes, full makeup not to mention 5 inch stillettos. I wonder what time they wake up in the morning to get ready?

He's more accepting of it than I am ... but he also doesn't like it when people touch him, etc but he usually deals with it better than me ... but I guess it's easier for him to explain in Thai why he doesn't like it happening.

She wasn't the only one who asked me if I was disappointed cos my baby looked Thai! Good job my son was born here in the UK he's so Thai looking, I've been asked loads of times if I'm his childminder or if he's adopted!

I've had friends who've been asked the same question! A lot of the Thai mothers at the school where I work who have western looking "look-kreung" kids often have people assuming they're the nanny, too.