Rdrokit

My fiancee used a term I am not familiar with while we were in a playful mood. Actualy I was teasing her about her shyness in the bedroom and she called me "yoo herr" or something to that effect. Sorry for the spelling. Can anyone please translate.

Thanks

A biker stopped by the local Harley shop to have his bike fixed. They

couldn't do it while he waited, so he said he didn't live far and would just

walk home.

On the way home he stopped at the hardware store and

bought a bucket and an anvil. He stopped by the feed store/livestock

dealer and picked up a couple of chickens and a goose. However,

struggling outside the store he now had a problem: how to carry all

of his purchases home.

While he was scratching his head he was approached by a little old lady

who told him she was lost. She asked, "Can you tell me how to get to 1603

Mockingbird Lane?"

The biker said, "Well, as a matter of fact, I live at 1616 Mockingbird

Lane. I would walk you home but I can't carry this lot."

The old lady suggested , "Why don't you put the anvil in the bucket,

carry the bucket in one hand, put a chicken under each arm, and carry

the goose in your other hand?"

"Why, thank you very much," he said and proceeded to walk the old girl

home.

On the way he said, "Let's take my short cut and go down this alley.

We'll be there in no time."

The little old lady looked him over cautiously. Then said, "I am a lonely

old lady without a husband to defend me. How do I know that when we get

in the alley you won't hold me up against the wall, pull up my skirt, and

ravish me?"

The biker said, "Holy smokes lady! I am carrying a bucket, an anvil, two

chicken's, and a goose. How in the world could I possibly hold you up

against the wall and do that?"

The lady replied, "Set the goose down, cover him with the bucket, put the

anvil on top of the bucket and I'll hold the chickens."

A woman walks into the downtown welfare office, trailed by 15 kids...

"WOW," the social worker exclaims, "are they ALL YOURS???"

"Yep they are all mine," the flustered momma sighs, having heard that

question a thousand times before. She says, "Sit down Leroy." All the

children rush to find seats.

Well," says the social worker, "then you must be here to sign up.

I'll need all your children's names."

"This one's my oldest - he is Leroy."

"OK, and who's next?"

"Well, this one he is Leroy, also."

The social worker raises an eyebrow but continues. One by one, through

the oldest four, all boys, all named Leroy. Then she is introduced to the

eldest girl, named Leighroy!

"All right," says the caseworker. "I'm seeing a pattern here. Are they ALL

named Leroy?"

Their Momma replied, "Well, yes-it makes it easier. When it is time to

get them out of bed and ready for school, I yell, 'Leroy!' An' when it's

time for dinner, I just yell 'Leroy!' an' they all come arunnin.' An 'if I

need to stop the kid who's running into the street, I just

yell 'Leroy' and all of them stop. It's the smartest idea I ever had, namin'

them all Leroy."

The social worker thinks this over for a bit, then wrinkles her forehead

and says tentatively, "But what if you just want ONE kid to come, and not

the whole bunch?"

"Then I call them by their last names."

Count me in. I wiil not be living full time in Thailand (Pattaya area) until January. Will be in country for 3 weeks starting Aug 4. Keep us informed of the progress.

A man was walking down Beach Road and when he turned a corner he came upon a funeral preccession. There was a black hearst and a man with a large dog on a leash following behind the hurst. Behind him and the dog was a single file line of men about a block long.

Wondering what was going on the man walked up to the guy with a dog and asked what happened.

The guy explained that the dog had killed his wife and mother in law. The man asked if he could borrow the dog and the guy replied,

"Sure but you have to go to the back of the line".

If you are a radical Muslim you might want to skip this one........ oh read it anyway.

Three strangers are at a small terminal in the Texas Panhandle awaiting their flight. One is a Native American passing through from Oklahoma. Another, a local ranch hand on his way to Ft. Worth for a stock show. The third is a fundamentalist Arab student, newly arrived at the Texas oil patch from the Middle East. To pass the time they strike up a conversation on recent events, and the discussion drifts to their diverse cultures. Soon the Westerners learn that the Arab is a devout radical Muslim. The conversation falls into an uneasy lull. The cowpoke leans back in his chair, crosses his boots on a magazine table, tips his big sweat-lined hat forward over his face. The wind outside blows tumbleweeds and the old windsock flaps, but no plane comes. Finally, the Native American clears his throat and softly he speaks, "Once my people were many, now we are few". The radical Muslim raises an eyebrow and leans forward, "Once my people were few", he sneers "and now we are many. Why do you suppose that is?" The Texan shifts the toothpick to one side of his mouth and from the darkness beneath his Stetson says, "That's 'cause we ain't played cowboys and Muslims yet".

Rdrokit, I think the irony of it would go over their heads.

And, like any word, farang can be used in a negative way. And when shouted at you by an adult male, most likely does, as the shouting is already rude behavior. From a little kid, well, obviously not.

Thank sbk. It probably would go over their head.

Ok, I am new around here and will not be moving to Thailand full time till January but what if you just similed, gave a little wai and walked away when someone calls you a bad name. Would that be a good response?

I think she goes by many names...........

Dick and Jane planed to get married.

The night before the big event they both died in a car accident.

Meeting Saint Peter at the Pearly Gates they asked him if they could get married in Heaven.

Saint Peter thought a moment and then said "I am not sure I will have to get back to you

later with an answer, so please come in."

After a month goes by and no answer from Saint Peter, Dick and Jane start thinking if they

get married in Heaven and it does't work out can they get divorced. If they ever see Saint

Peter they will ask him.

Finally after 3 months go by Saint Peter show up and says " I have good news for you, you

can get married in Heaven"

To which Dick replys," If it doesn't work out can we get divoriced?"

Saint Peter answers, "Jesus it took me 3 months to find a priest up hear! How long do you

think it will take me to find a lawyer!!!!"

Looks like some of you have taken up beer as a hobby. Probably cheaper than women....ha...ha.

Thanks Ken. Great example! When i get settle i will join expat club. See you there.

Hello to all,

My name is Byron (aka Rdrokit or Rocket for short). I need your help so I am posting this thread. I have just retired (I am 59) and am planning to move to Thailand from the USA in Feb 2007. I already have 4 Rais of land in Non Sung just outside of Khorat and plan on building a 1700 sq. ft home there.

What I need to know from you all is monthly expenses so I can make out a budget before I come over. Things like how much for utilities each month, what kind of insurance will I need and how much does it cost? I think petrol is about the same as I am currently paying $3.50 gal in the US. How much for groceries for 2 peolpe each month and any other expense you can think of.

Until I am 62 and my Social Security pension kicks in I will have to survive on a small pension from my past employeer and withdrawals from my IRA account so I need a budget.

Thanks in advance for all your help.

Byron

P.S. I have been to Thailand numerous times and am engaged to a lovely girl from Khorat

Fur coat..no knickers..

My Thai is OK and never learned to read and write, however, I am a lot more interested in the bold statement above!

or as thet say in Texas, "Big hat, no cattle".

All I would say is TAKE IT SLOW. I have heard of marriages with geat age difference working out but it is rare. I am 59, look 49, act 39 and am engaged to a 31 year old Thai girl.

BUT I have known her for 18 months AND have met her parents and family AS they will be my family if we get married. If you buy her land make sure you lease it back, if you build her a house make sure the house is in your name.

THINK WITH THE HEAD THAT IS ABOVE YOUR SHOULDERS!

Finally if the Democrats get in at the next election, I wonder whether they will reintroduce their previous plan to allow foreign retirees over 50 on retirement "O-A" visas to buy a single small plot of land for their retirement home in Thailand. That would solve a lot of these petty problems and makes a lot of logical sense to me. If restricted to say less than half a Rai of land it can hardly be construed as Thailand losing all their land to foreign investors. On the contrary it will encourage more retirees into Thailand bringing in their regular foreign currency pensions and not taking away jobs from the Thais, so perfectly fits in with general Thai values and beneficial to a good Thai/Falang community relationship.

Do you really believe that any Thais would vote for a party that helps farangs take their land and women?

I will be voting for whatever party came up with this law to finally stop farangs from pricing poor Thais out of their own land.

[/quot

Not all farangs are in Thailand to exploit the women and the land and if they are there are plenty of Thais benefiting too !

Bottom line is that Thailand wants to become part of the International community then it is going to have to change many things or loose out to those countries that will.

Haha. So letting in unproductive retirees who marry uneducated farm girls will help us join the international community? If these are the leaders of the "international community", I'd prefer to be left out.

But nice try with the meaningless cliches.

Boy, I'm not sure where to begin. Let's start with farangs pricing poor thai's out of their own land. Gee, did you ever stop and think that it's your own people selling the land to farangs? That's right, your own people's greed. The thai's who own the land do not care about "poor thais", their fellow citizens, they care about maximizing their profits. Now as to the women. No one is stealing your women, women are thinking individual human beings, and can make their own choices upon who to be with. My wife, who is thai, told me before we got married, she would never marry a thai man again, after being beaten and treated like a dog by her ex(thai)-husband. Perhaps you are the one who needs to stop with the xenophobic, hate-filled cliches and start to really understand what's happening with your land and your women.

well said Stevieff!

Perhaps we see things differently. I, too, hold land thru a company, but unlike you, I do care about my wife's financial future after I die, and so I am concerned about property values.

Hey there - of course I care about my wife's financial future. I dao have a lot of other assets that will be going her way after I die, which will be substantially more than any house I happen to leave her in Thailand. Whatever happens she and her family will be extremely well off for the rest of their lives - I'm simply not relying on some dodgy house ownership in Thailand to provide for that security - that's why I'm not having sleepless nights about it, and not too bothered about the value going up or down. OK?

Not exactly how you presented yourself in your original comment. This is a thread to discuss what is happening with regards to the new directive from the Land Office. If you're not interested in the financial impact of this upon your family, perhaps you might be better off commenting in the photography or bird-watching forums.

Look here - don't turn this into a f..cking pissing contest.

I have made many posts on what is now a combined thread, discussing the serious aspects of being deprived of the ownership of my property. I have already stated that the financial future of my Thai family is well taken care of and is not an issue - therefor it is of little interest to me if the short to medium term value of my house drops. I have, God willing, at least another 20 years on this earth, and by that time I can only imagine the house will be worth a reasonable amount. If not - it's simply not a big deal. Ok? Got it??

In any case, I wasn't aware that the sole purpose of this thread was to discuss the financial impact on families.

I would never have bought property here as a "nest egg" for my family, as I was aware of the risks and knew there was a chance I might lose it. I only invest in Thailand what I can afford to lose, as many have already advised - on this thread! How about you?

But that doesn't stop me discussing the current situation, and whether or not I can retain my current ownership.

Maybe you had better apply for a postion as a moderator as you seem keen on telling people which threads they should post on.?

Back to the subject in hand..

I have just been told through the "grapevine" that certain developers are planning to circumvent the new crackdown by simply transferring their shareholding in their companies rather than transferring the land to a new company.

Apparently, one particular developer has separate companies for each house he has built and he says he will transfer the 49% shareholding to the buyers when he sells the houses. No need to go to the land office, just transfer the shares in the existing companies, and thus solve the problem.

Seems too easy to be true

Any comments?

Oh yea, so you own 49% of your house?

This seems like such a long thread, that no one has suggested suing your lawyer or your real estate agent. If you took their advice in buying the land it would seem they are culpable. I know in the states that would be the first alternative. As professionals they would have an obligation to know the law; while you as a layman would not. I see a huge sign in Pattaya across from the Marriot, that says "Foreigners can own Land" If not criminal liability, certainly civil.

Just had to chime in on this. Sounds like something said from someone who lived in the States as they are sue crazy there. Why sue the lawyer for your ingnorance? Do your due diligence BEFORE you see a lawyer. As some on once said about lawyers, "Believe nothing you hear and half of what you read"