mark henry

Just read my replies today. Thanx all for your time and info on what is i guess a well trodden subject here. It seems travel cheques, dollars (nice clean ones?!) and uk cash is the way to go. I will not by Baht here as advised which i always did in the past. Plus i will change at Sawunapoom.

Thanks again

The Wife and i are going to Thailand next month with a week in Cambodia as well. Being easily confused i can't work out if its better (rate wise) to take sterling travel checks, take English pounds and/or buy Thai Baht here in the UK? Also, is it the case Cambodia only accept Dollars and Thai baht/Cambodia (Rile?) for small stuff? I hear it's better to change money at the airport for the best rates? true or not?

Your help/thoughts appreciated.

Mark

I don't get that uncomfortable feeling now as i go with my Thai wife but i used to. The first time i went to Thailand in 2000 was as part of a tour group with the sole purpose of fullfilling a long held dream of mine to visit a real jungle! (which turned out to be a bit dissapointing, only ever saw one spider!) Then i noticed how beautiful the women were and thats when my adventure began, and yes i visited the bars and had some fun no regrets at all. So what if thats why some guys go there good on them for go getting what they want.

The OP is concerned with bisexuality not homosexuality.

My view on bisexuality is that it is proportional to and determined by GDP. When I used to have British GFs they had all at least fantasized about having a liaison with another girl. The Asian girls I know have never even thought about it. Why? Because in advanced economies, people have time and money to explore their sexuality. Reproduction is a lifestyle choice. In more rural countries, reproduction is crucial to provide your workforce and your pension so you don’t have the luxury of exploring anything.

I'd like to second this, my Thai wife has pretty much had a "sexless" adult life until me (she's 41 now), she says she's been too busy working and helping at home to think about sex /men (not even solo!!)

This topic is making me bloody horny! My ultimate fantasy is to sleep with 2 bisexual women...

We've been married 4 years at the end of October. Generally I'd say it's been pretty good. Naturally, there are 'down days', difficulties with language & understanding. Sometimes the pitch of her voice can be a bit hard on the ears (dad also has that problem with her - as far as I know it's his only problem with her). Of course there are - happily not too often - the frustrating times.

I've not had to worry about her playing around. Her mum has done a great job with her & her (sorry, our) sisters. I've been 'family' from the start & treated that way from the first visit to the family home.

Only the younger generation have tried to have me as a cash-cow, but gave up when they sadly learned that loong farang wasn't playing that game.

Early in the relationship I did a surprise visit, arriving in the village about 4am. I only got into trouble for not having someone come to meet the bus & making my own way there. A foreigner with bags doing a 20km walk at that hour is a bit of a target, so it wasn't overly clever on my part.

Our wedding was held in the village (she wanted BKK) so as many as wanted could drop by. It was a great day and a lot of fun. Certainly a day I haven't forgotten.

I often have days at one of the local schools, helping the kids & teachers & get included in days out with the teachers. "no" is not an accepted answer, as they'll come to collect me. For one of last year's outings, our neighbours were heavily questioning TW as to why I was going out with 2 cars of women. She told them "it's OK, they're his girlfriends". She stayed home with mum. Would have been more entertaining if the rest of the group had come by.

There have been some heavy lessons both ways as to what is acceptable in either country with regards to how things are done or said. Cross-cultural marriages are more of a learning curve than a similar culture marriage, but that's 1/2 the fun.

It's almost a relief to hear that i'm not the only one who finds the high pitched tone of a Thai woman painful on the ears. I need to be at least 20 paces when the wife really gets into hjer flow!

I think the mind-set of Thai and farang are so far apart on the face of it the relationship would appear to be doomed from the outset. We've been together 4 years now and it's been a real roller coaster of emotions (both good and bad). I really do think Thai women are generally stuck at age 3 emotionally speaking! However, we are still together and we do have some great times together and i reakon we are reasonably happy and in love enough!

For some one just about to get together with a Thai my advice would be to empty your head entirely of any western notions of love/romance and watching the sunset together or you could be seriousley disapointed, i'm not saying you wont get that it's just she's likely to be thinking of that bag she saw today or a bowl of Somtam!!

The wife wears that John Paul Gaultier the one in the blue male body shaped bottle, strictly speaking for guys, gay guys but it smells fantastic, very sexy smell.

My understanding of the dark skin issue is that it's related to your occupation, if your working on the land (and there for poor) ect then your likely to have darker skin and i think thats how it relates to Buddhisim/Karma?

My Thai wife is also hung-up on skin colour and looks down a bit on darker skin Thai's and black folks.

Just to add, at the airport i had to taste our sons milk from his bottle felt a bit of pratt but no choice. The best advice re; small kids on planes is don't do it, leave him/her with a family member at home. Thats what we are doing this time, nightmare last time, screamed himself to sleep..never again at leat untilhe's 5/6 years.

Mark Henry loves his wife and she is traditional.

I'd like to know how guys feel about women who are in control of their sexuality as opposed to the submissive set.Of course in the perfect world,sex is a balance but it never happens.Environment plays a major part in this.Some Western women DO put up and shut up to satisfy their partners so they don't wander.Saying that the relationship was on the rocks in the first place is well just an excuse.

Some women take control of unfulfilled desires and unhappy relationships by seeking an affair or a sex buddy.

What do men prefer? This is in the Ladies forum so hum many wouldn't look here even homosexual relationships.SEX to many men is the definying factor of a relationship or why would so many guys post here about it?

Sure there are statistics in many countries about divorces and relationship breakdowns but it seems to me to be more prevalent here in Asia.SEX is used to get a guy/keep a guy/keep a relationship or marriage going by both western and Thai girls alike.Western women I guess are too liberated and independant to some extent and men are just plain lazy.They love the sex buddy/one night stand scene,the flirtatious messages,it's all been rehashed before.

Staying true to yourself is good advice.It's not about insecurity it's about reality.

yes i do love my wife and she's quite traditional but the cultural differences can be a real head-ache to deal with. As for what men prefer....submissive but with an open mind is the ideal

I hope it's ok for me to comment here, being a chap. My very limited experience of Thai women (and thats mostly the wife) is that they are very conservative and quite unaware of their bodies/sexuality. Of course i'm generalizing and don't include Bar girls but the wife for example would much rather watch her Thai t.v with a bowl of noodles rather than indulge in some bedrooms fun and when i do get her into the bedrooms she insists on lights out!! Is it me or are Asian women just plain dull in that respect or perhaps oppressed i don't know but it's tough on me some times Dare i say this but i'm not surprised most Thai guys have got "small wives"!

Sure you can comment here Mark Henry, thanks for your contribution! It's interesting to hear from the Thai woman's perspective (via her hubbie ) about watching TV and eating noodles!

We are all different as your post has demonstrated.

Would be interested in male/female responses/experiences to the questions you posed... Perhaps your rationale is correct and that is why the concept of the "mia noy" or the "bit on the side" appears to be so readily accaepted in this country ????

What do other posters think?

Thanks i was expecting a slating for my comments!

My wifes Brother-in law picked us up from the airport last year in his Toyota pick-up. There was him driving his wife in the front holding our then 1 1/2 year old Son (in fact he was perched on the dash!) me and the wife and two other kids sat in the back on tiny little seats, air con on full (they think i like to be frozen at all times), loud music, every one talking at the same time, doing it must of been 80/90 mph all the way! driving literally 2/3 feet behind the car in front. over-taking everything. In the end i could'nt take any more and just cowered behind the drivers seat convinced we were all going to die.

Guess who's picking us up next year!!

I hope it's ok for me to comment here, being a chap. My very limited experience of Thai women (and thats mostly the wife) is that they are very conservative and quite unaware of their bodies/sexuality. Of course i'm generalizing and don't include Bar girls but the wife for example would much rather watch her Thai t.v with a bowl of noodles rather than indulge in some bedrooms fun and when i do get her into the bedrooms she insists on lights out!! Is it me or are Asian women just plain dull in that respect or perhaps oppressed i don't know but it's tough on me some times Dare i say this but i'm not surprised most Thai guys have got "small wives"!

As hard as it maybe for you, leave her alone give her the space and time she needs to adjust to her new life changing event. Get a message to her tell her you love her and that you'll be there for her when she wants/is ready. Go and buy her some baby stuff and anything else she might need and some cash as well, this lets her know you care...but don't hassel her. It's the only thing to do from my own experience of my wife when she had P.N.D.

That's a very Western attitude. I agree of course in principle to be supportive, but in Thailand, you SHOULD hassle. Not in a threatening way, but if you do it the cool Western way with a note or something then this is NOT sending the same message of "YES, I GIVE A FUC_K" as showing up in person. It's your baby after all, not some silly legal or contractual settlement with a customer!! You're allowed some emotion of your own.

The emotion shown IS the communication. Women who our out to lunch don't listen to reason, but a show of emotion typically does get through. Reset your communications to a more basic level.

I see what your saying and maybe your right. However, although my approach maybe a Western one i have found with my Wife it works (usually!) as the alternative of "forcing" the issue, any issue only causing her a "loss of face" and a subsequent angrier and more defensive response. As others have said Thai's are on the whole very emotionally immature!

oh sorry...as to accommodation theres seems to be no shortage of guest houses, we got one for $6. a night! As i'v not been to Cambodia before can't recommend.

We are going to Cambodia too, March 08. Unless you can afford the rip-off price to fly to Angkor (thai Air have a monopoly on this) suggest go over-land, cheap and an adventure, takes best part of the day though. Wife and i will be doing the touristy bit too, Angkor for 4 days and then Phnom Pen (sorry too lazy to check how it's spelt) for 3 days. You can fly back to BKK from here also, a lot cheaper as no one airline has a monopoly. I'v heard some of the coast line is very beautiful and Tonle Sap lake is also meant to be very nice.

Have a good trip.

As hard as it maybe for you, leave her alone give her the space and time she needs to adjust to her new life changing event. Get a message to her tell her you love her and that you'll be there for her when she wants/is ready. Go and buy her some baby stuff and anything else she might need and some cash as well, this lets her know you care...but don't hassel her. It's the only thing to do from my own experience of my wife when she had P.N.D. Best of Luck to you.

I too suffer from stiffness in my finger joints and kness particularly in the mornings. It got worse as i got older. 43 now. However, a few years ago started Cod Liver Oil tablets (1000mg tabs) which pretty much sorted the problems for me, only ocasionally get a little pain/stiffness but nothing like it used to be. Plenty of oily fish and a generally healthier diet i think helps too.

I was very interested in your story, affraid i'v nothing to say to help with your dire situation other than you need to be strong and get out before she kills you.

I can relate a little to what your going through, my Thai wife although rarely attacking me has an amazingly volitile temper. Often for no reason or a small unintentional stupid comment from me can cause her to scream at me and/or our 2 year old Son. Some times it's totally irrational and impossible to understand why she behaves like a demented child!? However she also has a totally opposite side when she is really "up" like she's on drugs or a small child! I did think i had just been unlucky in my choice of wife but i'v picked up that many of her Thai girl friends are of similar disposition, an angel on the surface with a devil lurking not far behind. I'm sure there are some odd cultural/educational reasons for this but as you know yourself it's hard to understand and you feel so helpless/powerless.

Best of luck to you.

Agree with what others have said, we are pre-programmed to discriminate from the moment we are born, this is my Mother/source of nourishment/comfort he/she is'nt, i'll cross the road here that group of "hoodies" may beat-me-up, i'll hide my money here comes a bar girl. It's a matter of survival and quite natural, trick is to try and keep an open mind that that some one/situation does'nt fit the stereotype.

Maybe i'll get slated for this..but it does seem to me that Thai's are generally a lazy lot, sure they work long hours and pays none to good but maybe it's just an attitude of mind if i'm working in a shop and theres no customers i'd go and sought some thing out, clean anything to relieve the boredom, Thai's always seem to be standing around doing sod-all! They seem to lack any initiative, maybe it's the heat or more likely an education sytem that does'nt encourage using your brains too much.

Speaking as a buddhist with no necessary belief in "God", I must say that I've found Buddhism as it is practised to be very similar to Catholicism, another religion I have tremendous respect for. Service work, prayer, meditation, counting prayer beads, sermons, emphasis on moral integrity, spiritual community, confirmation and ordination rites of passage, etc. are very similar in both religions. Its no wonder that the more open-minded of both religions have enjoyed the benefit of much inter-faith dialogue over the years. No need to start a debating society over the subtle differences; just enjoy the commonalities and explore your spiritual universe knowing that you have spiritual friends in many, many places!

I enjoyed reading this very much, it reminds me of some thing i read by the Dalai Lama, he talked about it not being important what religion you followed as long as you lead a "good" and honourable life. In fact he suggested people from non buddhist countries don't try to convert to buddhisim rather practice an honourable life within the confines of their own countries culture/religion.

I found this so useful as i like the concepts of Buddhisim but feel strangely uncomfortable calling myself a buddhist! So now i have my feet in both camps and with an open mind.

You had better start saving ya pennies if your thinking of marrying her, the Sin Sod gonna be enormous!!!

My wifes daughter who's 19 and lives with her Grandma in BKK has to be home by 9pm on the dot or she gets a beating with a lump of wood!

I sent the hotel an e.mail making out i was going to stay with them until i heard they were/are ripping off their customers, again to reinforce the point to them that what they are doing is totally out of order.

I reakon as most of the Thai police appear to be corrupt the only sure way of safe guarding your money/belongings is to keep it with you or hide it in your room (although my only concern about this is that i'll forget it! which in fact happened to me, i forgot my 1000 baht deposit after booking out, i returned and they would'nt give it to me!!)