Robski

Burnt to the tune of 'I just can't be happy today' by The Damned, played on a church organ with the lyrics sung by a choir.

Spot on.

The Duck's Off.

there's no need for that kind of language, it was only a joke for ducks sake!

Yeah, sing the song, Bro'

If the sun refuse to shine,

I don't mind, I don't mind,

If the mountains fell in the sea,

let it be, it ain't me.

Alright, 'cos I got my own world to look through,

And I ain't gonna copy you.

Now if 6 turned out to be 9,

I don't mind, I don't mind,

Alright, if all the hippies cut off all their hair,

I don't care, I don't care.

Dig, 'cos I got my own world to live through

And I ain't gonna copy you.

White collared conservative flashing down the street,

Pointing their plastic finger at me.

They're hoping soon my kind will drop and die,

But I'm gonna wave my freak flag high, high.

Wave on, wave on

Fall mountains, just don't fall on me

Go ahead on Mr. Business man, you can't dress like me.

Sing on Brother, play on drummer..

Do you get it now Jet? uh? huh? Can you dig it!?

He's been certified and they're just wheeling him up the drive as we speak.

Yep, there is a boating lake near where I grew up and every time we passed it as kids

that joke would always get told and it was always funny, brilliant.

I never thought of you as a bitter man MrBo.

Sorry couldn't resist a bit of pub humour, I'll get my coat.

Happy birthday!! I hope you're having a great time.

It was a close run thing though eh mate? You've had more holidays than me!

You've earned your spurs in the General Forum, coming up with some excellent threads and asking the questions others we're just too afraid to ask.

Well after ducking and diving your way here, you need a place to chill out and have a laugh with your friends without dodging bullets from newbies and old farts.

I'm sure you can come up with a topic or two for us Bedlamites to get stuck into, we don't do politics, mostly bollitics, we've tried sensible discussions, but never get sensible answers.

So take your medication, get your PJ's and slippers on, pick up your crayons and start doodling on the walls.

Come in number 9 your time is up.

But sir, we've only got 8 boats!

Number 6, are you in trouble?

If Thailand wants to become a first world nation on a par with the US and Britain, it needs a well developed military-industrial complex that can redirect well needed money from education and healthcare into high cost projects such as missiles, securing a handful of high tech jobs.

Although it is highly likely that they will never get used and will need replacing every decade, it will ensure the rich elite and politicians maintain their position, all in the name of national interest.

Well done Thailand, you are showing the world how well you can adapt to western ideas.

You're damned if you do and you're damned if you don't. The only thing that matters is your own concience.

Do you know the one about the guy who finds a genie in a bottle?

The genie grants him one wish, so after thinking it over he decides he wants to do something that would benefit all his friends,

so he asks for a bridge to be built from Britain to America so everyone can come and go as they please.

The genie says he's not that powerful and asks the bloke to reconsider.

The guy thinks again and says he's having trouble with his wife and wishes he understood her more.

The genie says, how many lanes do you want on that bridge!?

Tiger beer is grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrreat, excellent if you can get it on draught.

This is my beer of choice at the moment, Lapin Kulta, Finnish beer. Far superior to Swedish piss.

The breath of the morning,

I keep forgetting

The smell of the warm summer air.

I live in a town

Where you can't smell a thing,

You watch your feet

For cracks in the pavement.

Up above, aliens hover

Making home movies for the folk back home.

Of all these weird creatures who lock up their spirits,

Drill holes in themselves and live for their secrets.

They're all...

Uptight.

I wish that they'd swoop down, in a country lane,

Late at night when I'm driving.

Take me onboard their beautiful ship, show me the world as I'd love to see it.

I'd tell all my friends but they'd never believe me

They'd think that I'd finally lost it completely.

I'd show them the stars, and the meaning of life.

They'd shut me away, but I'd be alright.

Alright.

I'm just...

Uptight!

Oh dear, didn't you get your coffee yet.

The topic of the thread is never mind the topic, surely the clearest sign ever that it's a free for all,

an open invitation to blatantly hi-jack the thread with what ever happens to float your boat.

If you keep biting and spitting at the other Bedlamites the warders might take away your crayons,

and let me tell you, a straightjacket in solitary aint no fun.

Wasn't there a thread about doing this sort of thing???

It probably got hi-jacked.

Mao II by Don DeLillo?

Well, let's just start cutting and pasting whole f** books like War and Peace, Complete Works of Bill, Rhubaiyat of Omar Khayyam...

"How to Make Friends Go Gaga in Bedlam and How to Send Fellow TV Members to Nana Land"

by Jet Gorgon

Cut and paste whole f** song lyrics, directions for the imbibing of insidious substances or books like War and Peace in 2 pt in posts.

Reply to these posts by leaving in the whole content and adding one emoticon to show your imbecilic response.

Repeat ad vomitum.

You got a beutiful chin,

You got beutiful skin,

You got a beutiful face,

You got taste,

You got beutiful eyes,

You got beutiful thighs,

You got a lot whout a doubt,

But i think bout blowin u out,

Coz you wont stop talkin,

Why dont you give it a rest?,

You got more rabbit than sainsburys,

Its time you got it off your chest,

Now you is just the kinda girl to break my heart in two,

I knew right off when i first set my eyes on you,

But how was i to know you fed my earholes too?,

With your ecessive talking,

Your becoming a pest,

Rabbit x 20

Now your a wonderful girl,

You got a wonderful smell,

You got wonderful arms,

You got charm,

You got wonderful hair,

We make a wonderful pair,

Now i dont mind avin a chat,

But you have to keep givin it that,

No, you wont stop talkin,

Why dont you give it a rest?,

You got more rabbit than sainsburys,

Its time you got it off your chest,

Now you are just the kinda girl to break my heart in two,

I knew right off wen i first set my eyes on you,

But how was i to know you fed my earholes too,

With your excessive talkin,

Your becoming a pest,

Rabbit x 8

Yup yup rabbit yup yup yup rabbit rabbit bunny jabber yup rabbit bunny yup yup yup rabbit bunny jabber yup yup yup rabbit bunny jabber yup yup bunny jabber rabbit

You're quite new to this aren't you sunshine.

There's somethin' happenin' here.

What it is ain't exactly clear.

There's a man with a gun over there

A-tellin' me I've got to beware.

There's battle lines bein' drawn.

Nobody's right if everybody's wrong.

Young people speakin' their minds

A-gettin' so much resistance from behind.

What a field day for the heat.

A thousand people in the street

Singin' songs and a-carryin' signs

Mostly sayin' hooray for our side.

Paranoia strikes deep.

Into your life it will creep.

It starts when you're always afraid.

Step out of line, the MAN come and take you away.

You better stop.

Hey, what's that sound?

Everybody look what's goin' down.

Hey Joe, where you going with that gun in your hand? ba dah dada dah.

Kayo you really know how to hit a bloke where it hurts.

£4.20 a pint!?

Lets just say my body is a temple.

There's no story and i can't remember the artist, but they're lovely pictures.

Splendid.

Wake up you sleepy head

Put on some clothes,

shake up your bed

Put another log on the fire for me

I've made some breakfast and coffee

Look out my window and what do I see

A crack in the sky

and a hand reaching down to me

All the nightmares came today

And it looks as though they're

here to stay

What are we coming to

No room for me,

no fun for you

I think about a world to come

Where the books were found

by the Golden ones

Written in pain, written in awe

By a puzzled man who questioned

What we were here for

All the strangers came today

And it looks as though

they're here to stay

Look at your children

See their faces in golden rays

Don't kid yourself they belong to you

They're the start of a coming race

The earth is a bitch

We've finished our news

Homo Sapiens have outgrown their use

All the strangers came today

And it looks as though they're here to stay

Robski , do your limbs jerk when you give that speech ?

So much so that my foot goes through the TV screen and the radio goes through the window.

That's infotainment.