SoCal1990

Let me know when you've figured out a way how to pay for a short times using Wise without showing your real name on the transaction. That could be a game changer for Thailand. Think about what that might do for the local economy and how many more new houses might get built by knights in shining armor in the hub of som tam.

When it comes to relationships in Thailand a key question is: Is it better to rent than to own? By “rent,” I mean spending time with short-time girls a couple, few times a week rather than committing to a full-time girlfriend or wife. On the surface, the financial differences are clear. With short-time girls, you pay by the serving for the services you want and nothing more, no monthly allowances, no family support, no gifts or trips to keep her happy. You’re also free from the routine expenses that come with a girlfriend or wife, like taking her out to meals multiple times a week or paying for her shopping. Dining out together may start as a fun activity but quickly becomes a recurring cost, especially if she’s accustomed to going to nicer places. All these little things add up over time, and with short-time girls, it’s not your problem. But the advantages aren’t just financial. Consider the emotional and mental freedom. Some relationships are wonderful in the beginning, but over time, they can become much more challenging. Once the initial honeymoon phase fades, and the rose colored glasses come off, then with it, patience on both sides can begin to wear really thin. Small disagreements eventually turn into bigger arguments, and then those can escalate into fights. Lies and mistrust may creep into the relationship, and sometimes one or both sides start taking advantage of the other, whether it’s her asking for more money or gifts, or you becoming less attentive or supportive. With committed relationships, there can also be an eventual breakup involving lots of grief, sadness, and heartache, not to mention it being a deeply depressing experience. And then, you’re left wondering if the relationship was worth all the time, effort, and money you invested into it begin with. With short-time girls, you basically avoid all of this ruckus. If you handle things correctly, there’s no emotional baggage, no drama, and no eventual heartbreak. You meet only on your terms, always enjoy your time together, and then part ways without any strings attached. So when you’re in the mood for companionship, it’s easy to arrange. And whenever you prefer to be alone, you have the freedom to focus on yourself without the guilt of neglecting a partner. And the great thing is, as long as you keep paying each time, you usually never lose the girl, only occasionally lose your turn when she's busy elsewhere. Some might argue that having a girlfriend or wife provides emotional connection and stability, but the reality is that long-term relationships don’t always deliver those things. Many men find themselves in situations where the relationship has become more about obligation and stress than love and fulfillment. Some may look at this viewpoint as shallow, but others may see it just as more practical and realistic and certainly less headache and grief. When you add everything up, renting seems like the way to go for many expats in Thailand, or does owning still offer some other major benefits that can’t be measured in terms of cost?

It’s something I’ve seen happen enough times over the years that it makes me wonder just how common it really is: A Western man moves to Thailand, when he's in his 40s or older, often on a job posting or for business, and he brings along his long-term foreign wifey from back home. Fast forward a few years, and that same guy has suddenly divorced the wife and married a much younger Thai woman. I’ve personally known three or four blokes who’ve gone down this road, and it always leaves me with questions. Is this really a natural byproduct of moving to a place like Thailand where the women and cultural dynamics are so different from the West? Or is there something about Thailand specifically, its allure, the culture, or simply its sexual temptations, that causes the breakdown of these long-standing marriages? From what I’ve seen, it often plays out in a similar pattern nearly every time. The man becomes enamored by the attention he receives from younger Thai women that are around him, especially when compared to the type of relations he's experienced within his Western marriage. Then, whether it’s the novelty or simply the allure of something “new,” he hastily leaves his wife for a relationship that seems fresh and exciting and that possibly makes him feel younger again. But here’s the downside: It doesn’t always end well. Some of the dudes find that their new Thai wives aren’t at all what they had expected. Financial strain is common issue, as the new wife may be all about the money, financial support of her family, and/or a spendy lifestyle. In some cases, the man ends up in financial ruins, paying out at a level he can’t continue to sustain and gets drained of lots of his cash by his wife’s extended family. And then there’s often the added regret later. I’ve seen men, years later, look back and wonder if they made a huge mistake. And I wonder if they would still be happily married to their original wives if they’d never moved to Thailand? Maybe the move itself exposed cracks in the marriage or perhaps it was simply the allure of a younger, more vivacious Thai girl that was enough to cause them to overlook the good thing that they were giving up? Of course, this raises moral questions too. Is it even fair to uproot your spouse, bring her to a foreign country like Thailand, and then suddenly dump her for someone younger and local? Is that selfish, even cruel, or is it simply just the nature of life itself and how things can change. But how common is this in Thailand, really? Is it a steadily repeating pattern among expats who move to Thailand with their Western wives? And do most of these men find true happiness in their new marriages, or do they eventually regret the decision to trade in an established and loving partner just for someone that feels new, exciting and a bit younger?

When you spend time out in Thailand’s ex-pat nightlife districts, you do notice one thing: tattoos are everywhere. It seems like every other girl who is on the game has ink, whether it’s a delicate floral design, bold tribal pattern, some mysterious Thai script or Buddhist icons, or just a messy mountain of ink. So, what’s behind it all? Is it fashion, or is there something deeper at play? Some say tattoos are tied to personal childhood histories. Could it be that many of these girls, coming from tough backgrounds, broken homes, or rural poverty, use tattoos to express themselves or take greater ownership of their bodies? For some, could tattoos act as a kind of emotional shield, a way to visibly display their stories, struggles and psychological wounds for the world to see? Or maybe it’s less about pain and more about standing out within the nightlife culture? Tattoos are more trendy now in Thailand, especially among some groups of younger people. For sex workers, working in an industry where appearance matters, is it possible that tattoos are just another way to stay fashionable or attract customers who find ink sexually intriguing? There’s also the question of freedom. Could tattoos be a form of class rebellion in a society that often judges women harshly? These girls seem to face some stigma already because of their work or circumstances, so is getting a tattoo their way of saying they don’t care what anyone thinks? Maybe it gives them a sense of control in an otherwise unwelcoming world. Of course, not every tattoo is a sign of something deep. Maybe some of them just like the designs they choose. After all, tattoos can be seen as a status symbol for some too. For a girl who has moved from a small, poor village to the city and started earning some money, maybe getting a tattoo is simply a way to show off all of her success. Are tattoos about fashion, rebellion, personal expression, trying to seek more attention or something else? Or are they no more than a blatant marker of emotional scarring of someone from a rough background who is now working out in the nightlife?

I’ve seen a common but distorted perception among Americans who’ve never left the country, and even some who are living abroad: America is the greatest, most free, and most opportunity-rich nation on Earth. The idea is ingrained in the U.S. from a very early age, reinforced through grammar school curriculums, history books, news media, and even Hollywood movies. This belief in "American Exceptionalism" often paints the U.S. as the strongest pillar of human rights, democracy, and freedom that the world has to offer. But is this view a product of reality, or is it a deluded symptom of never seeing or understanding what’s outside the box? For those who have lived outside the U.S., or who were born and raised in other countries, this narrative often doesn’t align with their thoughts. Many non-U.S. citizens may already live in countries where healthcare is affordable or free, where workers get generous amounts of paid leave, and where public safety nets are better at ensuring a decent quality of life without the stress of bankruptcy that many Americans face over something as basic as medical bills. Many people outside the U.S. feel they enjoy even more freedom in their own countries than what’s portrayed as uniquely exclusive to being an American. After all, can you truly call it the greatest country of freedom when people have to work two to three jobs just to survive and can’t stop worrying about their skyrocketing medical and auto insurance premiums? There’s also the question of personal liberties. In countries across Europe (and the most developed parts of Asia) citizens might feel safer and freer to walk home late at night without fear, protest without heavy-handed government responses, or express opposing political views without it resulting in the same level of societal division as seen in America. When compared to some of America’s many challenges—such as gun violence, economic inequality, polarized politics, and a lack of universal healthcare—many outside the U.S. see its portrayed “freedom” as merely marketing propaganda that’s been peddled to Americans and the world since shortly after the end of WWII. The problem is Americans who never travel abroad don’t ever get to see the many other developed countries in action. Without firsthand experience, it’s easy for naive minds to cling to the comforting narrative that America is the best country there ever was. But is this American belief based on actual facts and comparisons, or just on not knowing and never making any? And how do you think the views of people from other nations, looking in from the outside, stack up against America’s own vision of itself? Is it a view commonly shared around the world or just the distorted American view of itself?

Thank you all for your insightful replies, there’s plenty of food for thought here. For those with Thai wives, how much do traditional beliefs like superstitions, old wives’ tales, and even fear of ghosts play a role in your relationship? Do they add charm and cultural richness, or do they sometimes create unexpected stress and challenges? For instance, what if your wife insists on consulting a monk for help choosing lottery ticket numbers, deciding on travel dates, or making other big life choices? What happens if she even refuses to live somewhere because it’s “haunted,” or if she’s adamant about Feng Shui—rearranging furniture, doorways, or even entire houses to ensure good energy flow? If these beliefs don’t align with your own, then how can you navigate them respectfully while still balancing practicality and mutual understanding? I wonder if these cultural quirks usually bring couples closer by fostering a sense of tradition and depth, or if they add strain to an already complex cross-cultural relationship. Curious to hear from others on their thoughts and experiences in this regard.

Marrying a Thai woman often sounds like a unique and appealing opportunity, but how can one know in advance what they’re really getting themselves into? The idea of having a potentially beautiful, caring, and devoted wife who values family and home life is undoubtedly enticing. Add the cultural charm, great food, and warmth that many Thai women are known for, and it’s easy to see why many foreigners might be encouraged to take the plunge. But is the reality as perfect as it seems? Financial expectations, for example, can be a major consideration. In many cases, marrying a Thai woman involves supporting her family to some extent. Is this considered a reasonable cultural norm, or does it often become an overwhelming burden on the husband over time? And how can foreigners navigate this expectation without running into relational challenges and a feeling of being fleeced? Cultural compatibility is another question. The whole Thai cultural aspect that values harmony and “saving face” can sometimes lead to indirect communication. Does this help relationships by reducing unnecessary conflict, or does it cause frustration for someone from the West who is used to a more direct approach? And what about language barriers? How much do they limit deeper connections and understanding between two people when both partners might struggle to fully express themselves because of language? Finally, there’s the lifestyle factor. Some thrive in cross-cultural marriages, embracing the blend of tradition and modernity that a Thai wife can bring. But others might find themselves struggling to bridge the gap between two very different ways of life. So, is having a Thai wife everything it’s cracked up to be, or does it come with more challenges than would be expecting or find acceptable? For those already married or considering it, what other questions or concerns should weigh the most on one's mind before taking such a plunge?

The Black Pudding would be the part of the meal for me that never leaves the plate. I would never touch the stuff. I guess the Brits in Thailand must love that pigs blood tofu that they serve with the typical local boiled chicken and rice dish in Thailand.

Expat living in PANAMA: • Cost of living can be higher than expected, especially in urban areas and for imported goods. • Heavy traffic and poor urban planning in Panama City; challenging driving conditions. • Limited variety of imported goods and high prices for specialty items. • Language barrier for non-Spanish speakers; difficult to integrate into local culture. • Cultural differences, such as “mañana culture,” can frustrate those used to punctuality. • Bureaucracy in immigration, residency, and legal processes can be time-consuming. • Risks of property scams and challenges in securing work permits. • Hot, humid climate and long rainy seasons may be uncomfortable for some. • Healthcare quality varies; good private care is available but can be expensive. • Difficulty meeting locals or forming relationships due to cultural and language gaps. • Traditional family-oriented culture may require serious intentions when dating locals. • Perceptions of foreigners as short-term visitors can create challenges in forming relationships. • Language barriers can make meaningful connections with locals more difficult. • Expats may feel isolated or confined to cliquish expat communities. • Petty theft and crime in certain areas; some regions have higher crime rates. • Internet and infrastructure in rural areas can be unreliable; power outages occur. • Limited overland access due to the Darien Gap, making travel to South America difficult. • Dependence on air and sea travel for international connections and imports. • Isolation from larger cultural and economic hubs in neighboring countries.

When it comes to bedroom dynamics, I’ve always been curious about what most of the others prefer in the land of smiles. On one side, you have the “freak,” the woman who goes all out in bed, takes charge, tries everything, has no limits, is not shy about what she likes, is fully there for it, and is eager to blow your mind. On the other side, you’ve got the “starfish,” the type who seems much less into it, maybe isn’t all that enthralled with sex to begin with, doesn’t put in much effort but is easygoing, lets you take full control, and essentially becomes a blank canvas for whatever you want to do. The freak is the type who’s up for anything. She’s creative, curious, enthusiastic, and puts effort into making every encounter memorable. There’s never a dull moment, and she might even surprise you with ideas you hadn’t thought of before. A freak keeps things exciting, but sometimes her strong personality or desire to take the lead can overshadow what you want in that moment. If you like being in charge, this dynamic might feel like too much of a give-and-take when all you really want is to let loose, dominate and do things your way. On the flip side, the starfish is laid-back, passive, and tolerates just about anything you want to do. She doesn’t take control or make any moves herself, which can feel freeing if you enjoy being completely in charge. There’s a certain appeal to that feeling of submission where she just lies there, as it lets you explore your fantasies without interruption or pushback. Sometimes the freak moves around too much, taking things in directions you weren’t expecting, which can make it harder for you to focus on what you want to get what you need out of the experience. With the starfish, you can take your time and do exactly what you need to feel fulfilled. That said, the starfish dynamic has its downsides too. If you’re looking for mutual effort or someone who’s as excited and involved as you are, the starfish might feel underwhelming. She may do little to actively please you, so if you want someone to take charge now and then or simply “service” you while you relax, this might not scratch that itch either. Personally, I’ve found myself leaning toward a mix of both. I’m lucky enough to have easy access to each type in Thailand, where there’s no shortage of variety, and sometimes my mood dictates my preference. There are days when I’m in the mood for a wild ride with a freak who keeps things electric and unpredictable and that's who I call on. Other times, I want the starfish experience, where I can fully take control and focus on fulfilling my own fantasies without worrying about matching energy levels or accommodating her pace or desires and I have access to that too. Ultimately, it seems to boil down to the kind of experience you’re looking for in the moment. Do you prefer the energy, variety, and participation of a freak? Or is the blank-slate, rag-doll approach of a starfish more your style, one that lets you fully take the reins and shape the experience exactly how you want it?

The Jake Paul vs. Mike Tyson boxing match left us a lot to unpack, but not in the way anyone hoped. While Jake Paul technically won by decision as we know, the fight was far from the spectacle either fighter, or the audience, had been expecting. It was clear when Tyson walked in the ring from the first moment that he wasn’t at 100%. Reports now confirm he was dealing with a bad knee, so he was basically fighting with only one good leg, though this wasn’t public knowledge beforehand. Still, most people assumed Tyson’s legendary experience and power would outweigh his age and condition when watching him go into the first round. That turned out to be a mistake though. Tyson landed a few solid hits, but Jake Paul absorbed them without going down. This immediately raised an uncomfortable question: Does Tyson still really have the power that everyone thought he had and what once defined his career? On the other hand, Jake Paul didn’t exactly shine either. He didn’t hit hard or dominate Tyson in a way that would cement him as a serious contender in the boxing world. Instead, it was a fight where Jake had to hold back as Tyson visibly struggled. Some spectators even claim Jake could’ve knocked Tyson out in the later rounds but chose not to, out of pity or respect for Tyson’s condition. For Jake, this was supposed to be a career-defining moment, a chance to prove he could hang with the best fighter of all time. But the fight didn’t deliver on that promise. It wasn’t competitive, there were no memorable highlights, and it left fans questioning the purpose of the whole event. Instead of solidifying himself as a world-class boxer, Jake walks away with little more than a technical win over an aging, injured Tyson. As for Tyson, it’s hard not to feel for him. He gave it his best shot, but it simply wasn’t enough. Getting beaten by Jake Paul, who is widely considered a mediocre fighter at best, has to sting. Still, Tyson’s family might be counting the silver lining: he made $20 million and avoided serious injury. In the end, the fight felt like a lose-lose situation. Jake’s ambitions to prove himself fell flat, and Tyson didn’t get the chance to perform at the level fans hoped for. For the audience, it was a disappointment, a fight with no real stakes, no real excitement, and no satisfying conclusion. All either of them got out of it was a pocket full of money, which may be good enough for both of them, but no fame or admiration was captured on either side. What are your thoughts? Just a lot of hype and a big waste of time all around or do you think it actually gave us something more?

Thank you for all the comments and feedback. After reflecting on everything, I think I may be overdoing it, or doing it too often. I don't have issues with arousal or erections. I'm into it, I look forward to it, and I have access to partners who interest me sexually. Mechanically, everything works fine, and I ejaculate normally when I do finally orgasm. However, I suspect l've become a bit desensitized. I plan to try to cut back on the frequency to see if that helps me orgasm more consistently during sex. It won't be easy since I'm used to doing it daily, but I'll see if I can reduce it to once every 2-3 days and see if that makes a difference. Part of the driving force for frequency may be the fact that I naturally have exceedingly high testosterone levels. The last testosterone test I did last December showed that my testosterone was over 1,100 ng/dL. But I think high testosterone only contributes to desire/need and not necessarily performance.

After nearly 30 years of unbound adventure in Asia, I’ve hit an unexpected wall in the bedroom. In short, I’m finding it harder and harder to reach climax. I still enjoy sex as much as before, maybe even more now, thanks to a more adult mind that lets me appreciate the experience in a freer, more open way, with no shyness. The excitement is definitely still there too and I’m more in tune with what I like. But actually crossing that finish line? Not so much. Looking back, I think about the sheer number of partners, easily into the hundreds by now if you assume even just one new one a month for decades. The variety has been unreal: women of different ages, backgrounds, and countries. And there’s been no shortage of intensity, some were absolute “freaks” in the sack, checking every box imaginable. The thrill of constant novelty, combined with the allure of fulfilling all kinds of fantasies, always kept things fresh and memorable. But now, it feels like that constant stimulation has trained my mind and body to expect... more even when I’m fully into the moment. It’s not that I don’t still have the same interest in sex, I do, but actually reaching that peak? My brain feels desensitized, wired to a high bar I didn’t even realize I’d set. I’ve heard it compared to a kind of tolerance, like any intense experience you repeat over the years. The thrill wears off, even though it still feels thrilling, and then you need more to feel the same satisfaction. My body, in a way, has been “trained” by years of high-stimulation routines it seems. Now, in simpler moments, it’s harder to reach that point where things pop off. Those quieter, more ordinary (but still passionate) encounters? They just don’t trigger me the way they used to either. Physically, I’m still in decent shape. I can get my heart rate up to 175 bpm without much trouble, so it’s not a physical limitation. But I do wonder if I’ve built a mental wall over time that’s tough to break through. The issue isn’t arousal either; I stay excited, functional, and can keep things going for a couple of hours at times. But actually busting a nut? That’s the elusive part. So here I am wondering if anyone else experienced something similar after so many years of a similar lifestyle. I also hope one can somehow undo this conditioning and get back to a place where it’s easier to let one fly, or maybe this is the inevitable trade-off of chasing those high peaks for so long.

This is the fifth topic of mindless drivel you've let loose for today. Don't you have any shame?

So a few days ago GG made a post whining and moaning about having topic envy on AN, resulting from the many other topics in the Pub that are gaining so much more interest than his. Then, while feeling depressed and inadequate, he saw that a number of the trending topics are all about aging male issues. So, in a desperate attempt to get some clicks again, he comes up with this trolling concept to babble about doing a Bruce Jenner, while really he's just trying to steal back some eyeballs. He's really obsessed with AN and seemingly has nothing else in life to look forward to. So he will post anything he can think of for any effect. The worst thing that could ever happen to GG is that nobody reads his topics or posts replies to them anymore. That would be so soul-crushing for him. Even though he's trolling here, he would truly rather become a woman than not get any views or reactions to all of his ridonculous posts coming to you straight from the center for advanced lunacy. Yes, he truly is that desperate.