warfie

many many years ago a friend got a tank full of diesel... in his 2-stroke motorbike!!! but he wasn't bright enough to figure out why his bike didn't run anymore at least it was easy for me to fix

Don't worry too much, it shouldn't cause any permanent damage, as others have already said drain the tank replace the oil... plus the fuel and oil filters... just to be sure, pull the fuel line off the carburettor / fuel injector and let the diesel drain from the line too... expect it to be a little rough for the next tank of petrol but it should be ok after that.

Personally, I think this should be taken out of the Jokes section and pinned in the motoring section as essential tips for drivers in Thailand

I was in a quandary about where to post it...

Tips for Driving in Thailand

This began as serious advice for a visiting friend, somehow it became satire.

1. EXPECT THE UNEXPECTED!!!
   a) That motorcycle on the left IS going to turn right... the rider will not indicate and will only look AFTER starting the turn...
   Around the next blind bend / over the next crest IS a truck overtaking on your side of the road...
   c) Or maybe that driver is cutting the corner because that's just how it's done here...
   
2. To confuse Thai drivers, try using your indicators.
   

Indicators are to be viewed with scepticism, the driver / rider may be indicating which way s/he is going to turn, which side you should overtake on, which direction s/he came from or maybe they're on by accident and s/he just doesn't know how to cancel them.

1. A Thai driver's licence requires a medical certificate; one of the tests is for basic colour blindness, presumably so you'll know what to do at traffic lights. E.g.
   a) Green = go
   Yellow = go
   c) Red = tailgate the car in front and... go
   

An alternative interpretation of signal colours from a Thai friend.

a) Green = fast

Yellow = faster

c) Red = fastest

1. To annoy Thai drivers, stop at red lights and stop signs.
   
2. Thais drive on the left of the road... Mostly...
   
3. "Lane" is water falling from the sky. The lines on the road are purely for decoration and can be ignored...
   

1. There exists a mysterious area to the left of the main flow of traffic where road rules, common sense and the laws of space-time appear to be absent. In this area you may travel as fast or as slow as you wish, in whatever direction you wish, or just stop and talk on your mobile phone.
   
2. Speeding is an offence in Thailand, but just what speed should you be doing? There are few (if any) signs, so pick a random number and double it... or quarter it... it depends how you feel at the time...
   
3. Driving Under the Influence (Drink Driving) is also an offence, but the Thais have a unique way of circumventing detection... everyone drives as if they are drunk, weaving, swerving, stopping for no apparent reason etc... so that the police don't notice who is really drunk...
   
4. The only requirement for riding a motorcycle seems to be a literacy test, if you can write a suicide note, you're allowed to ride.
   
5. Popular motorcycles in Thailand are electric start 110cc four-stroke automatics, they need to be automatic or at least have an automatic clutch so the drunken 14 year old can talk or her mobile phone while weaving through traffic with her two friends (sitting side-saddle) and a scared little dog on the back.
   
6. When riding a motorcycle in the rain (or hot sunshine) many riders employ an umbrella for protection... if your mobile phone rings at the same time, have your passenger hold the umbrella for you.
   
7. Motorcycles are used for everything. Often fitted with an outrigger (An entire fast food store can be attached to the side of a motorcycle) and/or a trailer (a 2 wheeled cart drawn via the rider or passenger sitting on the handle). These machines have a carrying capacity limited only by the imagination. Also you may see a family of four aboard a single motorcycle, and it's likely piloted by the 9year-old sitting on her mother's lap.
   APPROACH MOTORCYCLES WITH CAUTION... (see points 1- 3, 5, 7, 8, 10, 11, Etc...)
   
8. When approaching an intersection it's important to be sure of who has right-of-way, there seem to be differing schools of thought, but generally it's the largest vehicle, although the most expensive vehicle is often given preference, however, the most widely accepted rule is that the driver with the largest "balls" takes right-of-way...
   

1. Avoiding accidents, when a situation presents itself;
   a) Sound your horn and/or flash your lights
   Sound your horn and/or flash your lights
   c) Swerve
   d) Accelerate
   e) Pray
   f) Sound your horn and/or flash your lights
   g) Trust that luck (or Buddha) will resolve the situation before it affects you
   h) As a last resort, if all of the above fail and you have absolutely no other choice you might try that 'other' pedal on the floor... the one to the left of the accelerator.
   
2. Road signs in Thailand follow international convention, being in both Thai and English... mostly... also recognised in Thailand is the universal international single digit salute...
   
3. Please use courtesy when parking... leave your car in neutral with the handbrake off so that the driver of the car you double parked over can push your car away to get out...
   
4. The Glacier Technique:
   Situation: you're in a side street trying to turn into a major road and the flow of traffic is endless... you can't get a break...
   Solution: edge forward an inch at a time, eventually the cars will have to curve a little get around you, keep edging forward, eventually a car will stop, because the driver has no choice.... After that, you may go... this also works for changing lanes and merging. (Btw; nobody will blast their horn or even give you a dirty look as you do this as it is considered normal... but you WILL get blasted from behind if you don't do it).
   
5. Taxis are cheap and plentiful; the driver may even speak English.
   Important! While riding in a taxi be sure to look at your hands, your feet, the floor... or anything except the road ahead... it's just better if you don't know (see point 14, 15, ...).
   
6. Safety belts are required for the driver and front seat passenger, but not for the rear seat passengers, probably because the rear seat passengers bodies are likely to still be there after an accident, whereas the bodies of the occupants of the front seats are likely to be much harder to find... safety belts save the ambulance bearers time...
   

Part II: Tips for Driving in Bangkok

1. DON'T!
   

<-- I don't know why the numbering keeps restarting, it didn't in the preview... sorry -->

I wonder if it's a simple translation error... some Thai folk get a little confused with our "ten thousand" and "hundred thousand"...

Thai language has different terms... หมื่น (meun) ten thousand and แสน (san) hundred thousand... in fact I've instructed my dearest to use only Thai terms to avoid confusion...

so perhaps the calculations are correct but the translation is off? just guessing....

Seems likely he's mentally unstable. Temporary insanity, etc. I don't think he's just a rich prick, as people like to say in some sort of online outburst about the horrible rich people they've hated all their lives. Just seems like he needs some serious mental help. Mentally ill, quite possible, in my opinion.

Errr, on the basis of what? I'm curious, you must have some excellent diagnostic skills.

You're quite right, sane rational people run over crowds of passengers after having fight with the bus driver about an alleged minor traffic incident every day. (which the bus driver and several witnesses deny even happened in the first place).

His own father described his fits of rage.

He was there with the police and the bus driver to inspect the alleged damage to his precious car when he suddenly attacked the bus driver with a rock then proceeded to ram that same precious car into the crowd. And killed a person!

But that's how any normal, sane, stable person would react, isn't it...

Jail or mental hospital, I don't want to share the roads with loonies mentally unstable individuals like him.

Any updates?

how amazingly off topic this entire thread has become...

The Rose of Suthep Home Stay is not cutting prices... no need... already good value...

shameless shameful self promotion...

doubly stupid because he could have deleted the pics to satisfy the steward and then recover them again later

warfie, the pedos get dragged into this back on page 2 somewhere, when one of these mindless numbsculls couldnt help himself.

and even stranger is the fact its you who keeps mentioning them

ok last comment..

if you re read my post i said 'they should save the life sentence for pedo's rapist and muderers, not some drug mule who is probably gettin a few g chucked his way..is that clear or should i write it in wingdings for you??

whoa.... I think you should be renamed "edit lightening" but at least we appear to agree on the mule issue...

is it a fashion thing to go on about pedos?

... in a thread about drug smugglers...

warfie, the pedos get dragged into this back on page 2 somewhere, when one of these mindless numbsculls couldnt help himself.

ya... I noticed... I generally try to read all previous posts before posting in a thread myself... probably the reason I don't post so much...

is it a fashion thing to go on about pedos?

... in a thread about drug smugglers...

Some people don't seem to think too deeply before blurting out some hateful uninformed bile.

This man was a "mule", they are used by the bosses so they don't get caught themselves, THEY are the ones that deserve your hatred.

The mule is usually paid a pittance in relation to the value of the stuff they carry and the profit their boss will make.

I mean if you had the intent and sufficient cash to fund the round trip ticket and the purchase of the merchandise, would you take the risk yourself?

Mules are often coerced into performing their task, for all we know his daughter was threatened.

Personally I'll reserve my judgement, good or bad, until I have full knowledge of the situation, which will never happen.

I wonder how much 'gear' is coming thru ur warf in melbourne?

No idea mate, lost all interest in gear and Melbourne many years ago... (hint; under Melbourne it clearly states that I am now in Chiang Mai)

and "Warfie" is a nickname which has nothing to do with past or present occupation... (and yes, I know it's not spelled correctly)

Some people don't seem to think too deeply before blurting out some hateful uninformed bile.

This man was a "mule", they are used by the bosses so they don't get caught themselves, THEY are the ones that deserve your hatred.

The mule is usually paid a pittance in relation to the value of the stuff they carry and the profit their boss will make.

I mean if you had the intent and sufficient cash to fund the round trip ticket and the purchase of the merchandise, would you take the risk yourself?

Mules are often coerced into performing their task, for all we know his daughter was threatened.

Personally I'll reserve my judgement, good or bad, until I have full knowledge of the situation, which will never happen.

But then Thaksin had a PhD in criminology and look what that lead to

a minor correction, but nonetheless making it even more poignant, is that his degree was in criminal justice.

that is so ironic....

Any word back from Thaksin on returning to serve his two years in prison and finish up the remaining cases?

Sure... he said he'd book his ticket as soon as P.A.D. organise a welcoming committee for him at Swampy and A.O.T. respond accordingly...

PM's SMS might violate privacy: consumer advocate

Consumer advocate Saree Ongsomwang on Thursday reminded about the possible offence on the privacy after Prime Minister Abhisit Vejjajiva chose to stay in touch with his constituents via text messaging.

Saree said under the telcommunication law, mobile phone operators are banned from releasing the list of subscribers without their consent.

She said Abhisit should opt to keep contacts with the people via television and other public communication outlets in order to avoid infringing on the consumer's right.

The Democrat Party should not place financial burden on mobile phone users, she said.

Democrat MP Korn Chatikavanij, tipped to become the finance minister, asked every mobile phone operator to transmit a text message to subscribers on Thursday.

The message read, " I am your new PM committed to lead Thailand out of the crisis. If you are interested to receive my messages, please send your five-digit postal code to telephone No 9191 (Bt3 standard rate applies)". It was signed "Your PM".

Source: The Nation - 18 December 2008

I dont see that Abhisit has done anything wrong here, the telecom companies were asked to sent the sms's if they did it, surley it is them that are breaking the law, I could understand it if Abhisit had "Ordered" them to do it, but from what i have read they were "Asked" to do it by Korn Chatikavanij.

FF

ummm... "...asked ..... to transmit a text message..." not "asked for a list of subscribers numbers..." big difference

however, even though I see this as a misinterpretation of the rules (how strange! ) I'm glad... I already get too much spam on my mobile... and THAT is from the mobile phone operator...

errr... so it's ok to send irrelevant unwanted unsolicited advertising (with no "opt-out" option) but not potentially important political communication... which, if it carries a "(Bt3 standard rate applies)" would automatically include an "opt-out"...

hahaha as I keep saying "all part of the fun!"

Maybe he'd heard about this fellow's law suit:-

Passenger sues airline for making him so drunk he beat up his wife

<--- snip --->

yep... that's exactly the kinda horse s#!t3 I'm talking about... I was raised to take responsibility for my actions... if he hit his wife that is HIS fault... if it was because he had too much to drink that's ALSO his fault... saying it's ok to hit his wife because he was drunk is CRA9! then saying that it's the airlines fault that he got drunk.... OMG!!!

Almost as stupid as boarding an aeroplane one does not feel safe on and THEN filing a lawsuit against the airline for it.... almost...

I can't believe you guys are still arguing about this. Don't you have anything better to do?

I refuse to answer that question until you answer mine first.

If he was so worried about his safety, why did he board the flight in the first place.

my thoughts exactly... he could have simply said "I'm not getting any flight until you scan me" lol

or perhaps he would have been happier with a more traditional, low-tech search... complete with rubber gloves and lubricant...

moron

oh dear... another litigation nation in the makin'... just like the one I was sick of before coming here...

on another totally unrelated note why do I find myself caring more about what happens here than I ever did in my home country?

coup d’état (pronounced /kuːdeɪˈtɑː/ AHD: [ko͞o"dā tä]), often simply called a coup, is the sudden unconstitutional overthrow of a government by a part — usually small — of the state establishment — usually the military — to replace the branch of the stricken government.

as in the events of 2006

the Military, by their INACTION, allowed the same to happen this year... IE: by refusing to obey the instructions of Prime Minister Somchai to disperse the PAD demonstrations allowing the overthrow of the Government... a "silent coup"

question answered... moving right along....

When PAD blockaded the parliament there were no injuries to the MPs, there were no reports even of attempts to physically attack them.

The violence was between PAD and police.

Go Away PLUS.

Stop your hatred and allow the new Government a chance to make Thailand better place for all, even people like you who is only happy if you can cause to spread your hatred.

Peace and success be with the new government.

I've just seen that as well.

What are you on about, kjspittman? Do you even read posts you reply to?

KJP I am too at a loss as to why you are railing at Plus?????

ditto... ... perhaps he was replying to something else or.... no... I don't know... huh?

American Beauty

^We'll see, but of course they only need a core of hardliners to cause mayhem.

There should be a lull now, so i'm using the opportunity to fly in for a two week break. Certainly easy to get flights. Not sure if many other potential visitors are being so pragmatic about using this window.

need a place to stay? strangely enough, we have vacancies...

due to current circumstances, as a cost cutting measure, the light at the end of the tunnel will be extinguished until further notice...