Aviador

Your best option is to forget the idea completely! Do a search on previous posts on this subject and you will find that importing a car is a major and expensive hassle. I don't know of anyone who has successfully done it.

Now I've just imported a used mini-tractor, but that's a different story

Simon

well 3 days into looking into it seriously i couldnt agree more!!!!!!!!!!!!

The engine is 3.2l ... now i knew the import tax would be daft BUT......... as the engine is over 3.0 litres it attracts an import tax of 300% #@$% that! nuff said on the subject i think !

p.s simon how many miles to the gallon u get? might be intrested

Oh boy. When I came here a little over 2 years ago, I would have loved to take my classic Mercedes 1983 300SD turbodiesel in mint condition with me. After getting nothing but negative answers, I still asked for a quote. Transportation from the east coast of the US (New Jersey) to Bangkok, taxes, duties etc. $ 16,000.oo US for a 20 yerar old car ?. The car was worth perhaps $ 7 or 8000.oo. But lets just say, if I had unlimited resources, just for sentimental resons I would take it with me and I am glad I did not.

I haven't posted anything here in a while because everybody was thinking I made up these stories, but nobody, and I mean absolutamente nobody knows how to fix anything around here, let alone a Mercedes. They couldn't even fix the air conditioner on my new Mitsubishi Pickup which had less than 8000 km on it. Washing machine, water cooler, laptop computer, flat panel PC monitor, digital camera, a silly table lamp, all under warantee. May mee, or no can fix.

The only somehow positive result was the realignement of my UBC dish antenna, which lost the signal, because the house had probably settled somewhat. The engieneer arrived as promised on a motorbike with a lady helper, who spoke english, (the fellow didn't). His "tools"consisted of a 10 mm open end wrench (spanner to you english blokes ) and a screw driver. First question, "do you have a ladder ?" Well I do have a 6 foot step ladder, but the dish is about 10 feet off the ground. However, if I back the truck against the house, you may be able to reach it. Said and done. But what if I didn't have a ladder and pickup ?

Anyway, life in the LOS. never a dull moment.

Hi John,

I spent halve the night yesterday on the telephone to the USA speaking with nothing but morons and imbeciles. Expensive too, the way the credit on the phone disappeared, I figured it cost me about 30 Baht a minute. One prime example of American “affirmative action” (meaning you get hired by the color of your skin not your qualifications) and by her demeanor was definitely of the black, sorry “African American” persuasion, advised me to appear in person with an attorney to sign a complaint against the perpetrator. When I conveyed to her, that I am living in Thailand, can not afford a $ 3000.oo airline ticket and would not wish to travel 18,000 miles for this purpose, her answer was “ Then you’all just have to take a bus or train.” This dumb broad had no clue where Thailand was. People like that vote ????

I am surprised that my play on words resulted turning this entire dialogue into a gay or no gay discussion.

Well, there’s peoples and there’s other peoples.

Regard Fred

Now I'll shut up.

Aviador, I apologize for over-reacting. Ya' see, being American, I don't understand British humour. But maybe you're an American or a Welshman or a Kiwi, and none of us has to understand the weird idiosyncrasies of each nation's weird humour.

Anyway, I don't know you. But I was viewing 'Recent Posts' and there you were, bigger than Dallas, sounding nastier than an injured Rotweiler. I would have sympathized with your plight, but you might as well have told me that, when I was swimming every day with 50 refugees from VietNam and China, I was molesting all of them, girls and boys. Now, if you're trying to say now that you were not posting about gay homosexual-related man-to-man behavior, you don't know the English language. Of course you were writing about that, and you knew it full well. I suspect, however, that you thought you had a license to make jokes about male rape because, well, we're just joking around, ya' know?

What irks me - seriously and deeply - is when somebody things that just because they insert a smilie here and there in an otherwise outrageous post about the sex crimes of my own family, it's all done in humour, like we're staging a Greek comedy or pretending to be Monty Python.

Swiss, Swedes - they're all over Hua Hin. In Spanish, the labels are more similar 'suize' and 'sueca' if I remember correctly. I was trying to remember, but it was too much trouble to go back and find it. Sorry for the wrong label. See, words do matter, eh?

Check my posts and you'll find I love to play with words and make puns. However, you won't find any jokes about rape victims. If I'd thought for one moment that the dive instructor had literally raped you, I'd have been much more sympathetic. My outrage didn't give me the time to say - and I say it now sincerely - hey, I'm sorry he took advantage of you like that.

Speaking of my family, Mama would have a fit, back in the 1950's, if she even heard the "F" word in the background. But times change, and as she lay in her deathbed in 2002, she said, "Don't use the cafeteria downstairs; the food is all f**ked up." And if the doctor had given her the wrong diagnosis, she might have said something similar. She would never have said he raped her in the rear end and made it six inches wide with his willie. There's a difference, there are boundaries, and your words sounded way overboard.

But maybe I'm wrong; I often have been. Please don't mistake me for one of those pathetic people who have to be 'Politically Correct' at all times. Have a good night and a great retirement; I'm trying to do the same.

P.S. I'm compelled to add, "American English" is English, too. I teach both, when I'm employed.

LOL, LOL. You are an American ?? 5555555 and a LOL to boot.

You are either drunk or on some illegal substance. I will forgive the rantings of a weirdo under the influence.

I hope you are sober when you teach, whatever you are teaching. In spanish they would call your kind: La tierra de los pendejos, espalda mojados y de las pinche putas. Muy buenas noches amigo, mañana será un otro día.

Saludos de el Capitán viejo.

Thanks for the PM chuchok. Don't worry,

most Americans are thick skinned anyway.

AND LET ME SAY IT HERE AND NOW. I DON'T WANT ANY POLITICAL BULL SHIT REPLIES CONCERNING THE WAR IN IRAQ, MR. BUSH, MR. BLAIR OR ANY OTHER POLITICIAN.

I am way beyond that. I want to enjoy my retirement, the rest of the world can kill one another. People will never learn from experience. Nuff said.

Well, it’s after 10 PM. Should be going to bed, but I am waiting for a phone call from the US. That’s the problem with a 12 hour time difference.

Anyway, a young “British” couple, late 20’s or early 30’s (I don’t know if they are married and I don’t care), rented a house next to mine. Very “high nosed” as we would say. Don’t bid a good morning, hallo etc. SNOBS I think is a good word for it.

Last Sunday morning, around 10:30 AM, 5 boys were watching this absolutely stupid American WWE wrestling on UBC. Well something happened, I was on the PC when they cheered loudly to whatever occurred. http://i5.photobucket.com/albums/y165/Avia...oolisout003.jpg

I am sure most of you are familiar with the vent cinder blocks they put into the walls in every room. Closing windows and doors does not make a house sound proof. Suddenly the bitch next door started to scream at the top of her lungs; Quiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiieeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeet we want to sleep.

I went to the front balcony and confronted the woman. “What’s the problem ?” “Caahhhaannt you keep your children quiet ?” “Lady, they are not my children they all live around here. Complain to their mothers”. “Yes, but they are in YOUR HOUSE” “Well women” I said, ”it is not the middle of the night, it’s 10:30 AM. The sound of children is music to my ears compared to your screeching . If this bothers you stick some toilet paper in your bloody ears. I was married to a paranoid female like you for 30 years. Is it PMS time ?

While I was typing this on the word processor, (I have learned not to do anything on-line,) TOT ADSL went from slow to lame to brain dead and everything was disconnected.

But thank God, Buddha, Allah or whoever, DSL such as it is, is baaaaak.

I am going to bed. Ratree savat everybody.

The ol ’ Capt. (never say die)

PS one of your smilies is an insult to the Muslim religion. A woman, and almost nacked

Boy, did I ever open a can of worms

Does that expression now mean, I eat worms for lunch ? I know, I know, as it says in the musical My Fair Lady: "Why can't the english teach their childen how top speak ect.....(in America they haven't used it in years) Well if some of you aren't familiar with certain expressions, I am sorry, that's your problem. When someone cheats you, he is either "f..g" you or if you want to say it in mixed company "screwing" you.

[He got taken advantage of, and being a straight male and probably homophobic, he couches the terms as "I got f----ed in the ass by a guy."]

Who said somenting about ass f..ing? or homophobia ? I thought he majority of you here were reasonably intelligent. I opened the post by saying "How words have changed their meaning, through the years". It happens in every language. Terriffic used to mean: "horrible, awful, disturbing etc." now it means exactly the opposite. "Greetings from Thailand, I am having terrific time". Your grandma probably would have fainted getting a message like that. The same with the word "gay". Did any of you ever watch the Flintstones cartoons ? Where is says at the end of the song "And have a gay old time". Does that mean Fred and Barni are homosexual ? In my time, gays were refered to as queer, and even that word 100 years ago did not refer to anyone being homosexual. It meant strange, odd, peculiar.

Teacher mode off

No, I am not gay, queer or even homophobic. Just because I knew this Swiss (not Swedish, get your facts straigt before opening your mouth) diving instructor, does that mean I am now an accessory ? He was not Gay, queer or homosexual. He was a paedophile. I too have a bunch of kinds hanging out here playing video games and watching UBC. Just because I knew this fellow was enough reason to have the police show up here to interview the kids. I missed my own kids they grew up too fast.

25 years ago I flew a corporate airplane for Volkswagen of America for a while. (believe it or not, the owners were Jewish ) The chief pilot, a 5'2" moron with a Napoleonic complex said to me once: "Why are you always trying to be a nice guy ? One of those days this is going to get you in trouble." At the time I thought his was one of the most moronic statements. But, in retrospect... (the SOB has been dead for 10 years) he was right in a way.

Sorry it I offended anyone. I don't want to say, some of my best friends are gay, because I don't have any gay friends, but I knew a number of people who are, and so what ?

I have a number of kids here every day. Most of them have no father, that is the old man just walked away. You know how it is here. But the little brats keep me young and my mind off my problems. How else could I always sound so up-beat when everything goes to pot?

http://i5.photobucket.com/albums/y165/Avia...inaugust006.jpg

Some of them as is the case of this little Burma boy who lost his mother and sisters to the tsunami, even sleep here.

http://i5.photobucket.com/albums/y165/Avia...loorsleeper.jpg

They are my "adopted" grandchildren.

The mother of one of the boys who knows about my problems just sent over a chicken dinner Cute.

Soooo, be nice to one another, life is too short as it is.

Best to all of you, the ol' Capt.

Somehow I don't see the "gay" connection in this thread.

And you wanna teach ?

Not english I hope

Oh, the gay life in the LOS.

I am old enough to remember that, 50 or so years ago to be “gay” meant to happy, carefree, cheery, relaxed, cheerful , light hearted, blight. (Even thesaurus does not connect this word with being homosexual to this day)

Then yes, I have lived the “gay” and carefree life in the LOS for nearly 2 years now.

I have posted my being screwed out of “almost” all my money here before. The chances of ever seeing it again are slim to non existent. But at least I had my social security check arriving punctually on the 4th of every month. 75,000 Baht (I got a raise of 4,5% cost of living adjustment, courtesy US government Life is a beach (and then you marry one :>)

It was enough to live on comfortably. Until the 4th of February. NOTHING. The 5th, NOTHING, 6th 7th, same thing. A midnight call to my bank revealed, someone had stolen my identity and emptied my account.

WILL IT EVER STOP ??????

I noticed in all the recent disasters, Tsunami, Earthquake, floods, ships sinking et cetera the majority of victims were Muslim. Allahu akbar!!!!!. Well I think Allah is pissed off at his bethren, but I am not Muslim Why me ???? Hey, I now really believe I am “Gay”, because my butt hole must be 6 inches across from all the screwing I have received. If I have to get f..t, at least I want to get kissed once in a while.

I wrote the following whilst TOT denied me ADSL service over last weekend again. (The engineer made a mistake again at 5PM on Friday evening and went to the pub)

I have learned one thing. Cheating Farang seems to be a national past time, but to completely strip someone of almost 3 million Baht within less than 2 years' time must seem some kind of record. Hey, Ripley put ,me into your record book.

I have posted the story of my erstwhile Thai partner T before, so I won’t even get into it again, except some of the e-mails I received from him:

I love the first part when I threatened him with the police: "Before you will do any think, if you go to police both of us have to fight by lawyer. And it will bring to many problems between us . Also you have no connect no paper with me about money problems."

(Yes, he made sure there was no paper trail and I was stupid enough to trust him)

He continues: "I'm a man, if I do the wrong thing I need a chance to sorving to a correct. Please,give me a chance and stop to destroy me by tell to any body cause 1 person will tell to 2 person to ten person and all of the village so how do my family can stay.I love my son and my family like you lov yours it have more valueable than money which I used from you.

Please , forgive me. T."

Yes, it is probably true. There will be a trial, perhaps 3 or 4 years from now. The judge will probably make him pay 3000 Baht a month. By now the attorney will have enough money to buy himself a new Mercedes. And I will be long dead by then. ‘Nother story: Oh I have many. (Who was the guy who complained I was “embellishing”?

While vacationing in Thailand in November 2003 on a boat trip to the Similan islands, I met a Swiss fellow who had lived here for more than 9 years, knew all the ins and outs, worked as a diving instructor and was part owner of a diving company. We corresponded via E-mail and when I made the decision to sell my home and move here I needed to find a way to deposit some funds. Since I did not have an account in Thailand he suggested wiring the money into his account until such time I would open my own. He was 52 years old and like me desired a retirement visa which would be good for 1 year and eliminate the annoying renewal trips to Burma every 30 days. The catch was, one would need to prove a minimum bank balance of 800,000 Baht, the monies also had to come from sources outside of Thailand. I wired 2 million Baht to him 2 days prior to my departure from Florida. Upon my arrival, I withdrew 1 million from his account and opened my own at a local bank. Since the procedure to obtain a 1 year visa seemed to require a great deal of paperwork, I told him to keep at it and whenever he had obtained the visa I would put the money into my account. We became very friendly, he was a whiz at computers and helped me out more than once when things went wrong with the blasted box of mine.

Then I had the accident. I needed money and asked him to now put the funds into my account. He did, to a point. After 400,000 Baht were deposited and I asked for more, he avoided me. During a visit to his home, my nosey young friend Mehn discovered his pass book which showed him using this money as though it was manna from heaven. 3 days later he went on a shopping spree.

The following was gleaned from B. Hager's personal Bank Account.

To be used only as proof of funds on hand from USA for retirement visa.

Balance as of March 20th, 2004 3.83 BHT

Deposit March 20th, 2004 1,968,980.oo BHT

Withdrawal March 20th, 2004 (Fred) 1,000,000.oo BHT

Balance: 968,983.83 BHT

Miscellaneous deposit June 20th, 2004 1,174.34 BHT

Total: 970,158.17 BHT

Unauthorized withdrawals:

24/03/04 10,023.oo

24/03/04 25,023.oo

24/03/04 3,460.oo

27/03/04 2,000.oo

29/03/04 10,020.oo

31/03/04 150,000.oo

28/08/04 769,359.oo

04/10/04 100.oo

Total unauthorized withdrawals: 969,985.oo

Total amount in account: 173.17 BHT

Moneys paid from account: 21/06 & 06/07 400,000.oo BHT

Moneys paid from unknown account 01/18/05 400,000.oo BHT

Total still due: 169,985.oo BHT

08/19/05 payment: 20.000.oo BHT

Balance: 149,985.oo BHT

08/27/05 payment: 8,000.oo BHT

Total due: 141,985.oo BHT

When I threatened him with the police, he told me some cockamamie story about having to buy fuel for the diving company which was about to go out of business, but he dug up another 400,000 Baht ostensibly from his mother in Switzerland. Which still left a balance of almost 142,000 Baht with the promise to repay me as much and as soon an possible, since the season had started and business was good.

Well, he was arrested a few weeks ago on a morals charge and is currently in prison in Bangkok.

Bye, bye 142,000 Baht.

I have 5000 Baht to my name at this moment, but expecting help from family (maybe) until I can change accounts. I can’t even sell my pickup which has less than 15,000 km, on it or the motorbike, because T has the books of both of them. He registered them without my knowledge in his name, for insurance purposes he said.

What did the guy say ? Bend over, I'll drive you home

I did send e-mail to the tourist police today though. Nothing will happen, because I did it before about the container guy who ripped me off in Bangkok.

Why me, dear Lord, why me ??? But its 31 degrees why bitch.?

Greeting the ol' Captain who is going to have another beer

Perhaps if you would learn to speak Thai and not rely upon cash to guarantee good service, you might find a more helpful constituency. Very frustrating to have to contend with all of these issues, but it's not different in the states or elsewhere...being put on hold, poor service, incompetent clerks, etc... But put yourself in their place....they are dealing with a frustrated farang and forced to communicate in other than their native tongue. Double frustration. Smile, speak Thai, and give it your best shot.

Easier said then done. I speak, read and write German as well as Spanish and will be 71 years old come March. If I were 20 of even 10 years younger, why not. Another obstacle is the writing. There is no Thai/english dictionary for one who is not able to read Thai. Someone says: "Savasdee crap", where would you look up what that meant ?

I have some children from the neighborhood who come to watch UBC. I speak to them strictly in English. It is amazing how much some of them have learned. Knowing English will help them more in their future than me trying to learn Thai. Whatever English they teach in school here is useless. Too much emphasis on grammar, no conversational syllabus. One boy has had English since 2nd grade and is now in 6th and all he can say is" Moment and I donno". Sad indeed.

Greets the ol' Capt'n.

kao chai mai ?

kor hai chok dee....

"Kao chai mai" Genau, mein Deutscher Thailing. Wie find ich raus was das heißt ???

How does one find out what that means ? Ask someone ? Well the person being asked would have to understand English, no ?

Since Kao (khao) means: White, rice, he, she, him, her, mountain, horn of an animal as wll as "enter" and even the number 9 ???

If it weren't for the writing, I am certain it would be an easy language to learn. No past tense, no plural.

Oh well, quien sabe .

Quit'cher bitchin and enjoy the sunshime. :>)

Aha.

It is 09:30 Saturday morning. The phone rang at 9:00. "Hallo". "Yes, hallo to you too" . "You bring in Monitor for repair ?" "Kapom, I did indeed." "You buy here ?" "no I bought it in Bangkok and you called to tell me that you can not fix it". "How you know that" ? "Farang intuition I suppose"

Monday I have to take the dog to the vet in Takuapa anyway, the only vet within 100 km, who goes on a 2 week vacation without leaving anybody in charge. Oh well, it's only a dog. Plenty more around.

So far Thai score 100%, Me, Zilch

Greets the ol' Capt.

Perhaps if you would learn to speak Thai and not rely upon cash to guarantee good service, you might find a more helpful constituency. Very frustrating to have to contend with all of these issues, but it's not different in the states or elsewhere...being put on hold, poor service, incompetent clerks, etc... But put yourself in their place....they are dealing with a frustrated farang and forced to communicate in other than their native tongue. Double frustration. Smile, speak Thai, and give it your best shot.

Easier said then done. I speak, read and write German as well as Spanish and will be 71 years old come March. If I were 20 of even 10 years younger, why not. Another obstacle is the writing. There is no Thai/english dictionary for one who is not able to read Thai. Someone says: "Savasdee crap", where would you look up what that meant ?

I have some children from the neighborhood who come to watch UBC. I speak to them strictly in English. It is amazing how much some of them have learned. Knowing English will help them more in their future than me trying to learn Thai. Whatever English they teach in school here is useless. Too much emphasis on grammar, no conversational syllabus. One boy has had English since 2nd grade and is now in 6th and all he can say is" Moment and I donno". Sad indeed.

Greets the ol' Capt'n.

Here you go Fred, not lost....... you used to be Aviador88

Alzheimer's rears it's ugly head

To get to your post, read it and be able to type this reply took exactly 9 Minutes. Reeeeal fast ADSL

Last week, my 16 month old flat panel LCD monitor decided to quit. I made sure it wasn’t the PC, by hooking it up to my lap-top. Out of warrantee of course, but Takuapa had a place where I buy my computer supplies, printer ink refills, paper etcetera, who’s employees insisted they could repair it.

Judging form past experience, I won’t hold my breath. They were nice enough though to lend (or rent) me a CRT monitor to use in the meanwhile.

To backtrack 20 months: Water cooler, 1 month old, no send in warrantee, no fix.

New washing machine, waiting for parts after 3 months was claimed by the tsunami. “So solly.”

Second washing machine under warrantee was ignored by dealer and repaired by yours truly.

Air conditioner of new Mitsubishi truck with less than 15,000 km, “No have” was the stock answer and cost me around 20,000 Baht to have it repaired elsewhere.

Dear old TOT lost my ADSL connection last Thursday. A trip to the ghoul of TOThood in Takuapa was in order. Trying to explain my problem to her, all I got was an icy stare and something mumbled to her co-worker. I only understood Farang and America. Yes, we Americans are a pain in the ass, but we are good tippers. (so I hear from the local folk) But when we pay for something, we want our money’s worth. But she did hand me a telephone number. Well, it wasn’t exactly the final solution, but another number connected me to repair service. This lady did understand English though and asked if my telephone was working. “Yes darling, no problem with the telephone, just ADSL is out.” “OK, I will call engineer”. I wasn’t going to hold my breath and after 3 hours of still no ADSL I purchased a weird looking “Nimungkorn??” 250 hour 1222 number unlimited ISP thing. Since I am very , very computer un-savvy, it took me a while to get the darn thing installed.. OK, dragon (was the picture on their envelope, or was it a Trojan horse ?) Let her rip.

NO DIAL TONE !!! What ?? Sure enough, now the phone was deader than the proverbial door knob.

Calling back the last number, the lady told me: “Sorry the engineer made a mistake, you will have your telephone line back soon”.

By this time it was 16:45 Friday afternoon and I know that these people do not work on weekends. Sure enough, at 17:00 the engineer probably locked up shop, went to have a beer with his chums and I had nothing until Monday afternoon.

But at least, it ain’t cold here.

--------------------

Service http://www.thaivisa.com/forum/index.php?showtopic=32463&hl=

Perhaps a little off topic and then again, not really.

I have been transporting some neighborhood kids to school every morning, picking them up as well in the afternoon. It started last year during the rainy season when their mothers never managed to get them there on their motorbikes without everyone soaked to the skin. Besides it is breaking up the monotony in my retired life.

Monday afternoon, the 3 boys were in back of the pickup horsing around and one of the boy's little 8 year old sister sat in the passenger seat, when she hummed Bruce Springsteen's song,"Weee will, wee will rock you !!!" Except she hummed: "We will, we will F*** you". "Oha, little girl, that's not the way it goes." " Where did you learn that"? "In school", she said.

Hmm. Is that going to be the welcome song played at all international arrival lounges at the airports ?

Just a thought.

Thanks for the good wishes, Dr Pat and Udon.

One of my favorite sayings: Don't worry about everything. Nothing is goin to be

allright.

A prosperous and healthy New Year to both of you.

The ol' Capt.

At l;east I don't live in Florida 

http://i5.photobucket.com/albums/y165/Avia...x/Havingfun.jpg

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

All the above problems only go to show you that the internet ain't gonna survive a nuclear war, as they so loudly proclaim .

As to banking, if you think THAI Banks are bad, think again : May 2004 i found myself together with my mother in Houston, Texas trying to exchange Euro cash for greenbacks. Tried several banks, no luck ! Tried going with my brother's wife to his personal bank where he has a local company account, no luck !

Ended up lending money off our in-laws to tide us over until our departure.

Living in America must be worse than being six feet under !

Happer new Year, Y'all !

Which remindes me.

Got this a while ago:

Dear Sir: I am writing to thank you for bouncing my check with which I endeavored to pay my plumber last month. By my calculations, three nanoseconds must have elapsed between his presenting the check and the arrival in my account of the funds needed to honor it. I refer, of course, to the automatic monthly deposit of my entire salary, an arrangement which, I admit, has been in place for only eight years.

You are to be commended for seizing that brief window of opportunity, and also for debiting my account $30 by way of penalty for the inconvenience caused to your bank. My thankfulness springs from the manner in which this incident has caused me to rethink my errant financial ways.

I noticed that whereas I personally attend to your telephone calls and letters, when I try to contact you, I am confronted by the impersonal, overcharging, pre-recorded, faceless entity which your bank has become.

From now on, I, like you, choose only to deal with a flesh-and-blood person. My mortgage and loan repayments will therefore and hereafter no longer be automatic, but will arrive at your bank, by check, addressed personally and confidentially to an employee at your bank whom you must nominate.

Be aware that it is an offense under the Postal Act for any other person to open such an envelope. Please find attached an Application Contact Status which I require your chosen employee to complete. I am sorry it runs to eight pages, but in order that I know as much about him or her as your bank knows about me, there is no alternative. Please note that all copies of his or her medical history must be countersigned by a Notary Public, and the mandatory details of his/her financial situation (income, debts, assets and liabilities) must be accompanied by documented proof.

In due course, I will issue your employee with a PIN number which he/she must quote in dealings with me. I regret that it cannot be shorter than 28 digits but, again, I have modeled it on the number of button presses required of me to access my account balance on your phone bank service.

As they say, imitation is the sincerest form of flattery.

Let me level the playing field even further. When you call me, press buttons as follows:

1. To make an appointment to see me.

2. To query a missing payment.

3. To transfer the call to my living room in case I am there.

4. To transfer the call to my bedroom in case I am sleeping.

5. To transfer the call to my toilet in case I am attending to nature.

6. To transfer the call to my mobile phone if I am not at home.

7. To leave a message on my computer, a password to access my computer is required.

(Password will be communicated to you at a later date to the Authorized Contact.)

8. To return to the main menu and to listen to options 1 through 7.

9. To make a general complaint or inquiry.

The contact will then be put on hold, pending the attention of my automated answering service. While this may, on occasion, involve a lengthy wait, uplifting music will play for the duration of the call. Regrettably, but again following your example, I must also levy an establishment fee to cover the setting up of this new arrangement.

May I wish you a happy, if ever so slightly less prosperous New Year?

Your Humble Client

Greets, the ol'Capt still hanging in

Thanks for the good wishes, Dr Pat and Udon.

One of my favorite sayings: Don't worry about everything. Nothing is goin to be

allright.

A prosperous and healthy New Year to both of you.

The ol' Capt.

At l;east I don't live in Florida 

http://i5.photobucket.com/albums/y165/Avia...x/Havingfun.jpg

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

You too old friend.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

again, thanks guys.

the new year really started with a bang.

my pc's flat panel lcd monitor rolled over and died sunday morning. no big problem, just use the laptop (so i thought :>(.

well it seems like my little urchins, whilst playing computer games, spilled coke or something into the keyboard, disabling the bottom row.

i am typing this via the "on-screen'' key board, one mouse click at the time. a pain, therefore excuse the no capitalisations. (this is worse than the ''hunt and peck method'' i was acustomed to). this i definitely do not miss either :>)

http://i5.photobucket.com/albums/y165/Avia...ix/b3f77ae9.gif

best regards the ol' capt,

I receive Thai Visa automatically in my e-mail. The topic was the December 31st deadline for simcard registrations.

Oha one minute. If I were'nt a reader of these forums I wouldn't know anything about it. Yes, I did read something like that quite a while ago (again in the forums) but nobody here in Khao lak has a clue. I just topped off my phone again today and as to my inquiry about registering it, the kid just looked at me wide eyed and uttered the magig words that every Thai must learn in Kindergarten: "No have"

It is a dumb idea like so many brainstorms politicians come up with. Things like talking nail clippers and pens from the crew of an aircraft in the aftermath of the attack on the WTC in New York. I was the Captain of a Lear jet about a week after 9/11, departing the New York area at 3 AM with a transplant team aboard. Some stupid bitch, who barely spoke english, had qualms about letting us leave, because the surgeons had a satchel full of knives, scalpels and other dangerous looking paraphernalia, without first getting authoriztion form a supervisor who, at 3 AM was home in bed sleeping. Here is a guy in desperate need of a heart already being prepped for a transplant at NYU medical center, the donor in Cleveland is ready (about as ready as he will ever be and this broad is jerking us around. The heart is only good for about 4 hours (maximum that's why we used jets) and we are here dealing with an imbecil. After searching my briefcase she tried to confiscate a swiss army knife one my sons had given to me years ago as a birthday present. "Over my dead body" I screamed."Let's get on the airplane and get the h***l outa here" (see Udon, I remembered ) . "I will get in big trouble" said the woman. "So be it". Well the night manager promised to explain the situation to the head honcho in the morning and we managed to leave.

The only reason I even brought this up. Assuming someone steals my phone, takes a bus down south, gives it to some towel headed camel jockey who blows up something. Somehow the phone is retrieved and traced back to me. Soooo ? Does that now make me an accessory ?

The warning about not answering unknown numbers makes more sense, to me. Anyway, happy New Year to all of you .

PS. The morning of that fateful day, September 11 , we were in Boston also with a transplant team. The doctors showed up at around 7 AM for the return trip to New York. As we taxied out to the other side of the airport, we passed the American Airlines terminal just as the B767 was pushed off the gate. I remember saying to my FO. "Isn't that a beautiful airplane?" (It turned out to be the first one to hit the WTC later on ) This time we were flying a Beechcraft Truboprop the only one available and to Boston, 40 minutes flying time, no matter what you fly.

As we neared New York's airspace, around Brigeport Connecticut, the controller queried: "Are you requesting priority?" "Shure stupid" I felt like saying. We are always priority. (Actually it was fun doing these trips even though they would wake you up in the middle of the night. Like driving a police car or fire engine with the lights flashing and horns blowing.) NYARTC must have known something was up, because as soon as we landed, the airport closed. I went into the office to finish the paperwork, when of the girls said: "An airplane just hit the WTC." "On a beautiful morning like this"?? I said. I thought perhaps some private pilot with his little Cessna had gotten too close. The she said, "No an airliner and another one just hit the other building".

I will never forget my answer."Must have been an Arab". "You've got a point there" said a female flight examiner who was there.

TV did a broadcast about our flight a year later, calling it a miracle, because we were the last airplane to land and the ambulance was the last vehicle to be allowed across the George Washington bridge, saving the life of the recipient. He was an ex Buffalo Bills football player. This was also the first time I actually met a recipient after having flown hundreds of those flights. NBC sports, I don't remember which station, did send me a tape of the interview and the film which I brought with me to Thailand. However it was in VHS form. My erstwhile Thai friend and partner gave it to someone he knows at channel 7 Phuket, who was going to make a DVD out of it. That was 6 months ago. Well I had my 15 minutes of fame. The second one. The first one was about Elián Gonzales, the little Cuban boy whom they found floating int the ocean.

But that's another story

Regards, the ol' Captain, it's been an interseting life, but who really doesn't miss it

Thanks for the good wishes, Dr Pat and Udon.

One of my favorite sayings: Don't worry about everything. Nothing is goin to be

allright.

A prosperous and healthy New Year to both of you.

The ol' Capt.

At l;east I don't live in Florida

http://i5.photobucket.com/albums/y165/Avia...x/Havingfun.jpg

I strongly suspect that as he has a phone line strung badly near power lines and in a rural area that hes not getting a clean enough line.. I had to replace 300m of line from the junction box to my house to clear up some ADSL issues..

As stated IPstar is his best bet for rural broadband but he seems unwilling to give it a whirl..

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Correct, and Aviador has published photos of the ratsnest of wires and ToT or whoever won't do anything about it.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Indeed I have.

One more time for good measure

http://i5.photobucket.com/albums/y165/Avia...ix/1ee9dfb9.jpg

http://i5.photobucket.com/albums/y165/Avia...ix/2778dfe7.jpg

http://i5.photobucket.com/albums/y165/Avia...ix/2778dfe7.jpg

Right up there with the electric wires, although at the "neutral", which is never neutral hereabouts. Knots, loops all along the road, about 10 poles.

http://i5.photobucket.com/albums/y165/Avia...ix/23fe175b.jpg

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Sorry, posted one twice. This one shows it better.

http://i5.photobucket.com/albums/y165/Avia...ix/93ec96c7.jpg

I strongly suspect that as he has a phone line strung badly near power lines and in a rural area that hes not getting a clean enough line.. I had to replace 300m of line from the junction box to my house to clear up some ADSL issues..

As stated IPstar is his best bet for rural broadband but he seems unwilling to give it a whirl..

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Correct, and Aviador has published photos of the ratsnest of wires and ToT or whoever won't do anything about it.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Indeed I have.

One more time for good measure

http://i5.photobucket.com/albums/y165/Avia...ix/1ee9dfb9.jpg

http://i5.photobucket.com/albums/y165/Avia...ix/2778dfe7.jpg

http://i5.photobucket.com/albums/y165/Avia...ix/2778dfe7.jpg

Right up there with the electric wires, although at the "neutral", which is never neutral hereabouts. Knots, loops all along the road, about 10 poles.

http://i5.photobucket.com/albums/y165/Avia...ix/23fe175b.jpg

Just have a few chang and chill out!!!!

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

jflundy.

Don't believe anything you read about the weather forecasts.

In over 40 years of flying airplanes for a living all over the western hemisphere I have learned not to trust any forecast extending further that 48 hours.

Case in point. Here in Khao Lak, which is 100 km north of Phuket, (yes Virginia there is a Khao Lak even though the Travel community refuses to acknowlede it ) there has not been a cloud in the sky since Thursday, belying the forcast which called for thunderstorms and heavy rain over the weekend. It had been unusually cool and wet this December here though.

Meterology is an art not a science. More an educated guess. Good weather has an 80% correct predictability rate, bad weather less than 20%. In the tropics the weather tends to be more stable and therefore more predictable, especially during the dry seasons. The weatherbrains will then play the same record over and over, injecting some possible veriants.

I remember quite a few aviation forecasts for places in the northeast of the US: Generally clear, visibility unlimited, occasionally ceilings less that 10,000 feet, with a chance of ceilings 300 feet or less in thunderstorms with visisblities less than 2 miles. Now that covers all the bases, doesn't it ?

I have said that, should I ever want to go back to college I would try for a degree in meterology. Where else could one keep a job, if you're wrong 50 % of the time.

Come on over. Chances are good your daughter will get her tan.

Regards, the ol' Captain, happily retired.

Hi Fred,

you've got Gmail, use it mate, it has autosave.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Sorry John. Nothing, nada, nichts. To access Gmail took me 15 minutes. I kept staring at the monitor, where at the left bottom corner something told me "done", but nothing was done, just a blank screen. After about 10 "refreshes" and 10 pop-up ads I finally got onto my mail.

Saturday I received a "Christmas song" in my Yahoomail from one of my sisters who lives in Germany. A file of only 3.4 mb. It was 5:30 AM here. Started out great, (for TOT anyway) 45 kb/sec, but aber 30 seconds it deteriorated to between 3.2 and as low as 1.9 kb/sec.

I went to the bathroom, put on a pot of coffe, showered and shaved. Emerging after about halve an hour it had quit and became unconscious once it reached 2.4 or .5 mb.

What garbage. They should be ashamed of themselves.

There's got to be a better way

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

..perhaps your ThaiProxy is very "lame"...

Changing proxy may help for a better connection....

To find out your IP -->

http://www.webyield.net/domainquery.html

A good proxy list -->

http://www.proxy4free.com/page1.html

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

That's all fine and well Kleiner, but what do I do with it ? What is a proxy ? I am not at all computer literate

Now, this morning for example: 5:59 AM, start computer. 6:00 AM, it's all booted up. Click "My yahoo". Go to bathroom. come back 6:03, nothing. Click refresh, make a pot of coffee. Return 6:05, still nothing. Click refresh a dozen times. Aha ! success. 6:08 Home page with the news:"You have 10 messages in your e-mail box" Click "get mail". 6:10 AM "verify password for security et cetera". 6:13: Can not find server. Click back button and try again. 6:15. There they are, all 10 e-mails. Click first e-mail: "Can not find server" Retry. 6:18 Read first e-mail.

And they call this "high speed internet" ???????

If your tel line is so poor and is not supporting ADSL properly why not just get IPStar 2 way sat internet..

Might not be as good as ADSL but its OK and its loads cheaper now than when I used to have it a few years back.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

If it is not as good as ADSL, what could be worse than what I have right now ?

In yesterday's Bangkok Post a reader writes:

I'd like to add my voice to the dissatisfaction with broadband service offered in Thailand............Despite living less than 5 km from Chiang Mai city center, I do not even have the option of cable ADSL and have to rely on the very expensive and unreliable satellite broadband which is exclusively provided by a leading Thai telecoms company................... At 2,500 Baht a month for 256/128 service this satellite system is three times mor expensive and almost double what you would pay for 2mb broadband with 30  channel cable TV in the UK.

But its the unreliabilty thar makes it especially poor value. During October I recorded dropped service on 25 days, often for more that 30 minutes and occasionally for several hours

If that's what you are talking about, no I don't want it.

Savasdee crap.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

...the good old time.....

...and pidgeons are eatable....

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Yes, like those delectable morsels. :>) http://anhduong.net/Tincongdong/Nov05/Sang...gcoAnGaQuay.htm

If your tel line is so poor and is not supporting ADSL properly why not just get IPStar 2 way sat internet..

Might not be as good as ADSL but its OK and its loads cheaper now than when I used to have it a few years back.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

If it is not as good as ADSL, what could be worse than what I have right now ?

In yesterday's Bangkok Post a reader writes:

I'd like to add my voice to the dissatisfaction with broadband service offered in Thailand............Despite living less than 5 km from Chiang Mai city center, I do not even have the option of cable ADSL and have to rely on the very expensive and unreliable satellite broadband which is exclusively provided by a leading Thai telecoms company................... At 2,500 Baht a month for 256/128 service this satellite system is three times mor expensive and almost double what you would pay for 2mb broadband with 30  channel cable TV in the UK.

But its the unreliabilty thar makes it especially poor value. During October I recorded dropped service on 25 days, often for more that 30 minutes and occasionally for several hours

If that's what you are talking about, no I don't want it.

Savasdee crap.

Hi Fred,

you've got Gmail, use it mate, it has autosave.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Sorry John. Nothing, nada, nichts. To access Gmail took me 15 minutes. I kept staring at the monitor, where at the left bottom corner something told me "done", but nothing was done, just a blank screen. After about 10 "refreshes" and 10 pop-up ads I finally got onto my mail.

Saturday I received a "Christmas song" in my Yahoomail from one of my sisters who lives in Germany. A file of only 3.4 mb. It was 5:30 AM here. Started out great, (for TOT anyway) 45 kb/sec, but aber 30 seconds it deteriorated to between 3.2 and as low as 1.9 kb/sec.

I went to the bathroom, put on a pot of coffe, showered and shaved. Emerging after about halve an hour it had quit and became unconscious once it reached 2.4 or .5 mb.

What garbage. They should be ashamed of themselves.

There's got to be a better way

Uninteruptable Power Supply.

Basically, a box with a bunch of batteries that power your computer if the mains power goes down. It gives you enough time to save any work open and then shut-down the PC normally. It also has a built-in voltage surge protector. they cost about 1500 baht.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

That's all fair and well Sir Burr. (I would love to hear a Scotsman pronounce your name. , Sirrrrrrrrrr Burrrrrrrrrrrrr), but the lightning came via the telephone line. A "bolt out of the blue" as they say. At the time the Storm wasn't even anywhere near here. I then installed a circuit breaker, which I use as a switch outside to the phone line and (if I remember to do it ) disconnect the line whenever I am away from home.

I also own some chinese contraption. Crude, with relays, no solid state spike sensitive crap, which regulates voltage variations. Not really a problem here, because other than outages due to tsunami reconstuction the juice has been delivered fathfully without major interruptions.

And, yes an 85 Ah truck battery with an inverter is also available, connected via a "hold when AC is available" relay which drops off and connects as soon as the power is off. This thing could power the whole house for quite a while.

Life in the LOS. Ever an adventure

Greets the ol Captain.