ravip

Sit for 10 mins with an alcoholic - you will feel life is very stress free. Sit for 10 mins with a priest, monk, sadhus & sanyasis - you will feel like gifting away everything to charity. Sit for 10 mins with a politician - you will feel all your studies are useless. Sit for 10 mins with a life insurance agent - you will feel that it is better to die. Sit for 10 mins with traders - you will feel your earnings are too meagre. Sit for 10 mins with scientists - you will feel the enormity of your ignorance. Sit for 10 mins with good teachers - you will feel like wanting to become a student again. Sit for 10 mins with a farmer or a worker - you will feel you are not working hard enough. Sit for 10 mins with a soldier - you will feel your services & sacrifices are insignificant. Sit for 10 mins with a good friend - you will feel your life is heaven! Sit for 10 mins with your wife - you will feel you are the most useless person on earth.*

3 men - a priest, a construction worker and an executive - board a plane and have adjoining seats in First Class. The flight attendant welcomes them and gives each a complimentary copy of the Wall Street Journal. They each quickly turn to the crossword puzzle and start. About 20 minutes later the construction worker folds up his paper and looks out the window. The other 2 glance at him a couple of times with some surprise/skepticism. Finally the executive leans forward and says across the priest to the laborer: “did you already solve that whole puzzle?” To which the guy replies: “yeah it was pretty easy today”. So the executive then asks if he’ll mind giving him a hint on an answer. The guy agrees “sure”. Executive: number 5 across - clue: a four letter word that is of feminine origin - I have the last 3 letters as _UNT. Worker: Yup that’s easy it’s aunt A-U-N-T” Priest speaks up: “Either of you guys have an eraser?”

A man who knew everything about liquor and little else, was asked by his old Headmaster to be the Chief Guest at his School’s Annual Day. At the function, he was asked to give an inspiring message to the students. He spoke : “Friends.... in life you will face a number of problems. You should face them like 'Napoleon', walk like 'Johnny Walker' and sing like a 'Bagpiper'. Only then, then the world will give you a 'Royal Salute'. Otherwise it will call you an 'Old Monk' and stick a 'Black Label' on you “. He sat down to a thundering ovation! Spirited Speaker for Sure !!!

What is the difference between Cialis & Viagra? What are the pros and cons?

That's if he is 'washable' by then!

Could you please elaborate your theory? How to come to Germany as an asylum seeker without a visa?

You gotta find a fiddler on the roof.

A very rare sight of the soul leaving the body. VID-20230520-WA0029.mp4

During the church service, the pastor asked if anyone would like to comment on the power of prayer. Susan stood and walked to the podium. She said,” Two months ago, my husband, Phil, had a terrible bicycle accident and his scrotum was crushed.” There was a muffled gasp from the men in the congregation. “Phil was unable to hold me or the children,” she went on “and every move caused him terrible pain. We prayed as the doctors performed a delicate operation, and they were able to reconstruct the crushed remains of Phil’s scrotum, using wire to reinforce and shape it.” The men in the congregation cringed and squirmed uncomfortably. “Now,” she announced in a quivering voice, “thank the Lord, Phil is out of the hospital and the doctors say that with time his scrotum should recover completely.” Susan went back toward her seat. All the men in the congregation sighed with relief. The pastor rose and asked if anyone else had something to say. A man stood up and walked slowly to the podium. He said, “I’m Phil.” The entire congregation held its breath. Phil continued “I just wanted to tell my wife the word is sternum, not scrotum.”

Seems everyone here missed the fact that the locals rescued him from the ordeal - if not, the result could've been different!

Turkey Breast made from Pork? Have I missed something?

Once anonymous... Sad and Cofused imoji galore. Strange but a reality. Very sad about the confused and sad people....

Sometimes I fail to understand what type of people get in to politics...

I was shocked to hear about this very sad news just now, while reading another thread. A great moderator (I know him only as such) who replied fast and precisely. Always with a helpful intention. My condolences to his wife and other members of his family. What a loss... Very sad... RIP Joe.