MinutePigglet

I'm afraid we're all going to HECK!

First, welcome to Chiang Mai. Second, Oh no! He'll be prowling Airport Plaza pulling his nampa tactics next!

Bastard (who is a Lamb), I think the common thread among these threads is generally correct. If you don’t want to meet girls in a bar, don’t hang out in bars. Bar girls do have lives during the daylight, I’ll have you know. And, they run rampant through places like Airport Center where you’re apt to be caught unawares, though it is sometimes hard to recognize them with their clothes on and sun-glasses.

The other salient point is “to be part of the community” which is indeed easier said than done, but possible. If you can be called by your name other than farang, you're one step closer. I can be part of the community via the conduit my wife provides; however, meeting girls through the wife is just… well… not very smart. Also, I have great neighbors. I've been able ingratiate myself upon my neighbors and their kids without the wife; but it is much more challenging without my much-better half. Good things take effort. Payayam Si!

What has worked for me (to be part of the community—not to get girls) is to hang out with some Kohn Thai co-workers after work, which is a natural part of maintaining what is know as gan eng. This is a bit daunting, as your language ability is directly linked to your ability to participate in conversation. It can be uncomforting when the entire conversation has to switch languages just to communicate with you. If you’re willing to learn and patient enough to sit and smile while you pick up paasaa nua then you’re on the right track.

I’ve been fortunate enough to be taken to quite a few places. Warm up, The Monkey Club, and Fine Thanks (Nimanhaemin Road w/ fine looking waitresses). These are more like eateries than bars. They are very social and are places to hang out, drink (or not—many Thais don’t), eat, listen to live music, and chat. The people who frequent such establishments are definitely of a different caliber; and you’re right you won’t see too many farang. For a lot of farang, this can be incredibly boring.

In a way, I envy your being young, not-fat nor ugly with money living in Thailand and SINGLE. Oh, I’d probably get into trouble anyhow. You said you were gainfully employed and mentioned the university area. Might you be a teacher? I’ve always thought that English teachers get all the girls (at least that guy who wrote The Scribe made me think that; but then I’ve got a dirty mind. Is this true? From the look of this thread, I’m guessing it isn’t.

So laddie, plant your feet and get off the easy path of the Loi Kroh and show your neighbor’s daughter how graceful a farang can be. Just don't be a dick about it.

Hey I've got a question, I'm going to be in Chaing Mai during the first week or so  in April and would like to know what the best massage school of instruction is for Thai Massage. Any suggestions?

If you mean that you want to learn "Sen" massage (a.k.a. Thai Nuat); then I'd suggest a place that English is spoken well, unless your Thai is up to snuff. Pictures are great but will only take you so far.

Along Loi Kroh about halfway to the night bazaar on the left hand side just past the wat parking lot are two great spots. The second one down has a white sign with green writing, the other is just before it.

Both give exellent massages. Both speak English well enough to teach and offer classes. The green and white sign is owned by a farang. He schedules well and doesn't overwork the staff, which ensures a pair of strong hands. I find the one prior a bit more sanuk and friendly; but sometimes too chatty. These places will probably give you a better price than those advertised on the web.

On the web, but having never gone is this place among others. In looking at the prices, they seem to be targeting the farang demographic. You should be able to get the same or similar tutlage from the ones I've mentioned prior.

Enjoy!

Well, this late in the game, I'll give ya' my view. She thinks you're cheap, because she said so. What do you want us to do--make you feel like you're not cheap? "You tell me who is right." You're both lame. Maybe you are wisely living within your means, cool. But she thinks you're cheap. Why fret? Start spending more or dump her. Grow some balls, address the situation, and make some f%^&ing decisions for yourself that will secure your ego, your heart, and your mind. Otherwise, you're going to carry this underlying concept into your relationship that she thinks you're cheap. Let that one brew for a couple of years and see how many times it's inadvertantly revisited at the most inopportune moments. Is saving money on a little more time out on the town or a few bus trips and cheap lodging worth more to you than her love? Only you can answer that.

Well said, Stoney!

You go girls! Have your fun... your whimsy attitudes are a breath of fresh air in these stuffy confinges. Post naked.

I agree this thread is dead! If winle-what's-his-name doesn't get it by now, he won't ever get it. I've seen this trait before. "Most of us ask for advice when we know the answer but we want a different one.," said Ivern Ball.

Let's start some new threads, I promise not to be such a pig.

Yawny, why not drink a German beer?

Last time I say it:

Yawner: Cheap (as discussed here is STINGY) has nothing to do with the way you treat people; or more accurately they way I write my posts. Sure, I may be abrasive, pendantic, and even intenionally rude (yeah for me!). I might even be tawdry, sleazy, and contemptible because I lack of any fine, lofty, or redeeming qualities. Might that be intentional? Would you like me more if I said cutsey, wootsie, little ramblings? You probably would. Go drink a beer, then you'll understand.

Stinky Pootie & Lesbian friend (with mustache): your recent additions prove that you both add very little more than opinion and would much rather talk about yourselves than anything else. Which is ineed fine and the status quo. However, every single topic you discuss turns into something about you. That's what's aggravating. I invite you to return and read very closely my prior post about how flippant and whimsical postings diminish the integrity of a well organized forum like Thai Visa. Sadly, I don't even think you're even trying to be annoying while your closeted katooey costume is gathering dust.

Anyhow, I wouldn't take it too personally either. I mean being lambasted by a pig, really! We are here to have fun and enjoy and learn from eachother, no? I did mean what I said though about turning this place into a social club. But, since you gals (or at least one of you is when the other is not on top wearing a pig suit and waving one of those wooden dildos around like a cowgirl's lasso), seem to think everything is related, why don't we just toss out topics and forums all together? We could just pick up our mobiles and have a party line! Less girly musings and more facts, garuna na ha.

Hey, What's your name, (yes, I could have written Winle to prove I have more than 4 brain cells); but then rocket scientists aren't funny. I think it's all been said: You now have to sift through 12 pages of crap to find it. Yes, some of it mine. Don't forget it's all about us!

Oh ######, I broke a nail. Can you believe these mannish ruffians and their treatment of this delicate little pig? I'm ready to crumble. Maybe, I'll start a thread on the best nail polish at Mah Boon Krong...

Love and kisses to all!

MP

Friends, Romans, #####rymen (and women... in pig suits... with man hands );

A lot is said up here. There's a lot of I don't like this; or I love me!

But, inquiring minds want to know: Why are you here?

Is it the girls laddie? Or is it the boys? Is it the ocean breezes or the root doo now? Could it be Lychee season? Or maybe, the feel of the fire hose after an all nighter of spicy food is something you just couldn't live without.

Entries could be a short story like: "I was born here." Or it could be a longy: "I just had my sixth Beer Chang and thought, 'That's it! I'm gonna marry her. We'll talk politics all day long.'"

5, 10, 20 pages gaw-dai. Up to you...

Why am I here? Oh I'd thought you'd never ask!

My wife is singing a story about my neutered dog, Cupar (a fine border collie named after the fief in Scotland). It goes something like this (to the tune of Country Road by John Denver):

Have you seen...

Cupar's balls

In the place

They ought to be

Check the trash can

Ambush the mail man

Hold the calls

For Cupar's balls

Repeat ad nauseum (hey, how do you center things here?)

Anyhow, that's why I'm here. YOUR TURN!

One last effort here. This isn't a what I love/hate about muang Thai topic. It's about why you are actually here. The reason. One word or a thousand--up to you...

XXOO,

MP

You're not thinking of setting those hairy things loose out here are you?

If your wife is interested, have her check out the most popular Thai forum, www.pantip.com.

I think this one hits it on the head.

Great thread, btw; and the site is valid.

I'd venture to guess that most mia Thai don't care much for discussion politics; let alone what their husband thinks about Thai politics, which is--for the most part--none of their business.

It's the immigration and visa laws though that affect all farangs living and working in Thailand; and the wives should very interested in that. Thai's love a good story, but would like to trust that Khun Thaksin is taking care of things for them.

What's that sound, the roar of a thousand irrate farangs who have an opinion about Khun Thaksin? Too bad... your opinions don't count.

My suggestion is to get some guy friends to drink beer with and talk politics. Talk about love with the wife she'll love you more.

XXOO,

MP

This thread is about what's-his-name (forgot already after two back to back yawners from Yohan) being cheap or not.

It's not about bar-girls, but it might be about what it takes to keep them happy.

It might also pertain to what it takes to live on the cheap with a limited income. Something a lot of people do and try to do in LOS.

Who ever said what's his name was dating a bar-girl anyhow?

It's not about people's limited knowledge (read ignorance) of what it must be like to grow up Thai or in a rural area or why Khon Thai choose to "date" a farang.

It's about what's his name being cheap or not.

Hey, what's your name, you'r not cheap until she dumps you. And, if she sticks with you when you're broke. Well, you've chosen wisely, my son.

If my girlfriend called me a cheap charlie, first I'd check to see if she was serious. Then I'd tell her to pay her own bar fine.

If my wife told me I was a cheap charlie, I'd check her in as non-compos-mentus.

If Yohan told my I was a cheap charlie, I'd buy him a beer and dictionary.

By the way, where is Ugly-Piggy? I think she's avoiding me. I miss her so!

Geez, my fingers smell like tuna again. That's what I get for touching myself while eating...

Enjoy!

MP

PS: Natee, anybody ever tell you that you look amazingly like Iggy Pop?

hey miss cuteypants.....give us all a rest from your sugary sickly high school teenage  drivel and put a sock in it.

Thanks for your comment. When I decided to join this forum, I didn't expect everyone would love everything I wrote here. So, that's all right. I cannot please everyone anyway. When I said something smart, someone accused me of being a white male. When I said something so girlie or stupid, someone was offended by it. Uhhh... who says women are hard to please?

Dear Ugly-Cutey,

It's not the namby-pamby banter that is so irksome nor is it the fact that you are an ex-bargirl-cum-quasi-omnicient katooey in pig's clothing. I believe the issue is that you're turning ThaiVisa's threads into a frickin' social club in an obvious and nauseating ploy for succourance from behind the distant facade of an anonymous avatar.

In this world of information overload, I find it near impossible to shift through all the shit to get to any salient points of converastaion; and your little snipets of "girlyness" are like white noise.

I'm not saying we shouldn't have fun. I'm also not saying that the world shouldn't be about you, you, you. I'm sure there are others who would subcribe to the Ugly-Cutie vapid-mindless thought of the day. There are social forums expressly for this purpose. This is a call to everyone to, garuna na ha, keep our threads in the right topic. It's the least we can do to keep the forums useful for everyone.

What was this topic about, anyhow? Oh, yeah: Being cheap is all about levels. I know people who show off their Rolex's but make the girl go betsu-betsu on everything, which is the norm in Japan, but not in LOS. There is also a certain amount comparison and of fairness in the deal as well.

For example, let's say you have an income and you share it with your "significant other." You do this on your own accord out of love or for whatever. For the most part, unless that girl is in some form of entertainment profession it is unlikely that her income comes anywhere near what your income is. This includes pentioners and retirees as well. If she is a poor girl from the farm then what she has to compare this to is one thing. If she was a poor girl from the farm and she met you while she was "working" then the comparison is different. If she "working" and she's not from the farm then I wonder how you met her in the first place.

A man who lives on a few frozen bananas doesn't seem the type to socialize in Bangkok's elite social circles or to fraternize at the Miss Thai Universe after parties. So, to answer your question. If she hasn't dumped you yet then you're not that cheap. But, if she's telling you that you are then there is some basis for her comparison. Find out what it is. Are you going to let that affect your relationship, ru blao?

You see, Ugly Cutey, you made me post off topic! Oh now, I'm pussy whipped! I'm under your spell! I feel the strange urge to dress up in women's clothing. I'm sorry. You're right! It is all about you! I have to go eat a bacon sandwhich now.

Love,

MP

PS: The fact that you are a closet pig lover is one of your most redeeming qualities, na ha.

I've scoured the City and have come up dry in Jiengmai.

Can anyone recommend a DStv shop that sells infrared repeaters.

If not, can I ask someone in Pattaya get me the number of a place in Chonburi?

I'd love a Powermid if you can find one...

I'm a lovely cutie.

I think you're a pig trapped in a bar-girl's body.

Oh dear, here he goes again. This guy is always good for a laugh, isn't he?

Probably he is actually posting in a clever parady of those dim-witted Europeans who can turn nearly any subject into an angry rant against Americans, or maybe he actually is...nah, this rubbish couldn't be for real.

Two out of the three highest ranking diplomats at the US Embassy are married to Asian women as well as countless lower ranking diplomats. But, come to think of it, maybe it's just some kind of weird manifestitation of their 'racist hate'.......

I have family members living in the USA and have also friends who are holding USA-nationality. This thread is called *nasty US Customs Attitude* and was started obviously by an US citizen, and it should be possible for me to post my opinion there, too.

I am not an overall *American Basher*, but critical about this and that - you can read all about on my own home-pages. Also my posting in this thread is not an angry rant.....

I said, immigration rules are unusual strict for foreign wives, who like to marry an American man - (includes my own daughter)

I said, there are no visas of personal invitations, as we use them to have in Japan and in Europe for people we like to invite. (includes my own daughter and visitors we welcome from other Asian countries here in my home in Japan)

I said, there are feminists and American Asians, who hatefully oppose any immigration of Asian women into the US and who attack any white male, who has an Asian wife. (just read some of my e-mail I am receiving!)

and so on....

I think, these are some reasons why somebody started this thread called *nasty US Customs Attitude*

and as it must result in some unusual checks at the US customs.

Yes, this is my opinion....

http://www2.gol.com/users/johann

http://www2.gol.com/users/johann/g/america.htm

and other linked pages.

To Mr. OldAsiaHand:

I am well accustomed to posters like you. Unlike you however, I do not see any reason to stay in hiding. My identity is no secret and I stay to my opinion.

Always when people like you are showing up, they do their best, to stay in hiding and to avoid any clear discussion about the subject, but accusing the others....

Who are you?

On my own homepages there is a messageboard, a link to a discussion forum of my German friend, and a guest book and a reference to my e-mail.

We can discuss it out there anytime (but not here in this forum, this is not the place for it) but when you show up next time for discussion with me, then please sign with your real name.

Johann

Maybe you should change your name...

Hmm... let me see: Take out the "oha" and thrown in an "aw". Yes, that's it.

YAWN...

I'm sleepy now. You?

GET OVER IT! or shave... one of the two...

"BEARDED CLAM!"

Who said that? Jeez! Sorry. Hey, quiet under there!

Let me put it to you this way...

If you got a visa, you'll get in. Nasty or not. Sure, they might take away your 220 volt electronic butt plug even if you claim that it's an antique; but for the most part. What the heck are you cryin' about?

{looking for more beer}

_____________________

I never said I wasn't a pig. 

She loves me, na ha!

Would that be Nang Nual??? If not then I'm VERY interested in directions to the place!! I mostly go to Similan Seafood on Fa Ham road these days.

Three ways to get there (maybe more):

1) Heading south on the tree road. Careen right just past the Sheraton, but before nong hoi. It'll be on your right before the golden cock.

2) Heading north on the tree road. cross mahi don, then just after the intersection make the first immediate left without killing any motorcyclists. Look for golden cock sign. When that road dead ends make a right it'll be on your left.

3) Of mahi don heading east make a left BEFORE the tree road. After Chang Klang. It'll be on the left after the golden cock. Look for the guys with the uniforms and whistles.

By the way, the Cock D' Or is ab fab with a price to match.

Aloha!a

PS: Crap, I just realized that these are directions to Nang Nual. Sorry, my bad!

crossing Don Muang puts you in another world.

Aom Muang. ;-) Don Muang is the village/town where BKK Airport is. ;-)

Freudian slip there, Flipper!

What I meant was Mahi Don... Yes, that's it: Mahi Don.

Thanks for catching me with my pants down.

My guess is you have dual citizenship.

You want facts? Please contact your nearest Thai embassy or consulate.

Let me ask the dumb question: How do you plan to support yourself?

Hey, are they Star Alliance?

I'd like to see a line up of all us here. Then I'd profile the lot. It would be fun:

"It's behind the black curtain for you Thaiquila. This is a strip search!"

"You, Yohan, take these Ex-lax. This bull-dyke will be joining you in the restroom."

"Ah, Mr. Kringle, this way, please. Have a nice stay."

The main problem is that most of us probably look like shit after 15+ hours on a plane.

Gather round the fire now, kids. My anecdotal story was in Hawaii, way back before 911, when the pudgy customs guy, having glossed over my exploded bottle of Astroglide and 50+ left over rubbers, had finally managed to empty my entire suitcase. In the bottom wedged in the corner was a small plastic bag with some green stuff in it.

"What's this?" He asked.

"Um, I don't know. Let me see." Preparing for something bad, though having not partaken in any canibus activities while abroad.

He held it high in the air and examined it under the lights. As he turned the package over between his fingers I noticed some Japanese writing on it.

"Ah, that would be furakaki. Seaweed, you know? Good on popcorn." I informed him, that I had a stop over in Japan.

At that, he gave me all my crap to pack again and flicked the furakaki into the pool of Astroglide.

It's hit and miss with customs agents. Now, they have random spot checks that aren't even based on profiling. But, they do profile! So, look nice and as Kringle said, "be polite."

On my last trip to the States, the man asked me where I'd been.

"Thailand, Cambodia, Malaysia, India, China, and..."

"Pakistan?" He asked.

"Nope." I replied and was shown the exit.

Regardless, there's plenty of bad eggs out there. Just be glad you don't have their job.

M. Pigglet

_____________________

I never said I wasn't a pig.

It's not only farang who die on bikes being drunk and reckless.

Songkran kills about 500 people a year. Mostly Thais.

The common denominator is lack of common sense, however I think more Khon Thai die due to the fact that you can fit more on a motorbike!

Sorry to hear that, Mr Pigglet. But I am a Thai woman who dates a "foreigner"

Saying that all Thai girlfriends are nothing, but LBFMs is just like saying that all men are pigs. It is NOT true. And actually, it kind of says a lot about the one who says it, not the one who is mentioned.

I've had my article published on Stickman's website. A few people know who I am, and that I am not a white sicko surfing the net pretending to be a woman.

Now, can we get back to the original thread?

Eee Noo,

There is NO WAY that a Khon Thai even knows what an LBFM (let alone stickman) is unless she's a man.

Also, monkeys can't type.

I rest my case.

{everyone hears a resounding church chord}

Besides... you started it!

I'm right on target. The boy is naive.

First imagine the type of person who would actually apply for and then get a US customs job... OKAY? Now imagine what they have to do. They profile people all day long and put up with hundreds of <deleted> a day.

Now couple it with the stress of the constant 911 drizzle and homeland security ripple effect...

You'd probably handle it worse, but then you're not a customs agent.

Be glad you didn't get the enema treatment.

If you want to get through cleanly. Look cleaner.

Image is everything, unless you get the random private screening behind the black curtain.

You talkin' Nong Hoi uptown or downtown...

There's a big difference. Aside from Bloody excellent anythings; crossing Don Muang puts you in another world.

I read this a while back on Asia Bugle:

Many tourists, only here for the beach and temples, inadvertently allow their mind to drift towards their sexual fantasies. It's too much staring at coconut palms that does it! Resolving those fantasies is possible, but not quite as simple as you may think. Recently, an acquaintance suffered a heart attack after a night spent in search of fantasy. Knowing the guy was a reasonably fit person, I asked him what on earth he had done. "Two Viagra, two ecstasy and five eighteen-year-olds," was his reply. He may just have deserved it, but I suppose it's not a bad way to go! He is now fully recovered, and interestingly his doctors, while warning him off the ecstasy, said the Viagra was okay!

Gotta love it...

Or not...

Enjoy,

MP

Donuts (at 10 bahts a bag)...

Dude! doughnuts and sausage...

You must have some serious munchies, or you're pregnant!