Krap

Hi TV PPL

To cut the chase, I am married and got a girlfriend (Gik) pregnant. She is threatening to contact my government and make me pay money for this child that maybe mine? What are my rights as I never asked for this weight upon myself. I will do what is right but feel trapped as it was not wanted.

I was assuming that u didnt live in thailand since the threat was to contact ur goverment. Get a feeling that u live with ur thaiwife in thailand? In that case i guess ur subject to the thaicourt in first hand as mario implies.

Id also be mostly worried about the wifes reaction...

Since a gig is involved i think it might be fare to question if ur the only one shes been with? Did u see any proof of pregnancy yet, if not ask to do so.

Congratulations.

Take with you the birth cetificate from the hospital, that confirms the birth. Also take with you the original household book to register the child on that.

http://www.dopa.go.th/English/servi/birth.htm

Just to follow up, I eventually convinced the hospital medical records department what I wanted to do and they allowed me to go with them to the local Amphur and signed for his birth certificate myself with their help. Now have his birth certificate with my name shown twice once to say I am the father and second that I registered the birth.

Martin

Thats great news and very good for u and the child!

The mother can file a paternity suit on behalf of the child, in which the court woould establish wether you are the father or not. It they find that you are the father the you would be required to pay child support, the child would possibly acquire your nationality and would be entitled to an inheritence when you die.

The paternity suit could also be filed in your home country. In my home country the mother would pay minimal costs for such a court procedure.

You and the mother are both responsible for the birth of the child and should both contribute to its cost of living. The law in most countries will only take the child into consideration. Thai law is not different, and if you are the father a Thai court will order you to pay child support. Depending on your income and that og your gik, the 3,000 baht mentioned by Krap doesn't seem far off the mark. The child support is for the child only, not to support the mother.

Does thai fathers actually pay childsupport? How is this distributed and what happen if they dont pay...?

Hi TV PPL

To cut the chase, I am married and got a girlfriend (Gik) pregnant. She is threatening to contact my government and make me pay money for this child that maybe mine? What are my rights as I never asked for this weight upon myself. I will do what is right but feel trapped as it was not wanted.

Tricky position to be in anywhere in the world. Ur rights? Not sure exactly what you are refering to but if the baby is urs and she follows the pregnancy trough then there is a chance that u might have to pay for it. (remember its ur child to) The argument that u didnt want this isnt really vallid since u had sex without proper precautions...and has anyway absolutely no legal bearing. U cant legaly force her to abortion.

Is what u want to know whats the risk that u have to pay up? What to do to avoid it..?

1 Is it really ur baby?

2 Does she know all ur data? Name, nationality etc...

3 Where are u from? Treaties regulate childsupport and such and thailand didnt sign up to some international treaties like the hague. That could be good for u.

4 If the babie is born and u dont accept it as urs, she can put ur name on the birth certificate but it still doesnt make u the legal father. Dont sign any papers if u dont want to be responsible.

5. Lets say its ur baby, its born and she want to get money from u. First shed have to make clear that ur the father. Shed propably have to be able to show pictures or proof of ur relationship.

So seem to be at least 2 steps, first being to establish whos the father. That should be done in thailand. Dna testing could come in to play by courtorder. An other part is the childsupport, shed have to bring a lawsuite against u. That might be very costly. Shed have to pay initialy for lawyers etc (she have that kind of money?) and it could take years before its finished and first then might she get the money back. If she wins the lawsuite u will have to pay all the legal expenses she had and urs plus the childsupport. That would be a worst case scenario.

The fact that she has to pay a lot to later possibly get it back means quite a risk for her. Getting the money from u might be hard so to say. Id say thats what u have to stand on.

Leaves u with some choices..

1. Disapear and let her handle it as she chooses.

2. Talk her into abortion/ pay her to do it.

3. Be responsible, find out if its ur baby, u can buy a dna test at any good hospital. If its ur child offer to pay childsupport, reasonable ammount about 3000 bath per month in my opinion. And if its ur child then wouldnt it be right to the child that he or she knows u?

Well there is lots to say but i guess its about 3-4 am and im getting dizzy....

yr engrit is fine. yr brain isnt. if u worried bout how much gold to give family i suggest u run fast. they gold digging thai family.

Im not giving gold to anyone except as a pure gift to the mother of my child for ex a ring or such. Buying into marriage isnt my thing. Its not even needed when the girl is young, middleclass, well educated, non married with no previous children. If the girls loves u shell make sure ur together no matter what.

Things like that make her value less.

I understand that English isn't your first language, but that could be construed in all manor of ways, unfortunately, on occasion, people here will have a field day with the comment.

Just for clarity, if a previous marriage, or indeed child are involved it can lead to certain aspects being reviewed.

I am trying to be economical with words in order to try and alleviate the blood lust that is surely building with the mere mention of sinsot.

What didnt u like with my english? Staying in thailand makes me simplify grammar all the time....and for MrSvetare that might be the right aproach....

I suspect hes from scandinavia but who knows.

okej

hope somebody can answer my questions then

Hej MrSvetsare!

50000 bath is not that much if u can afford it. Its up to u. Dont pay more than u feel is ok. If u feel something is wrong with the whole deal so it probably is and u better not pay. To pay something is about culture and in our culture its not habbit, so i think u just do what u feel is right and if u cant pay that amount then offer less. It depend on many things, the girls was married before? She have chikdren before? Things like that make her value less.

Lycka till

Im steaing a bit out of topic but relating to my last post i had a long taxiride today, driver being familly father in his 40`s. Said he had 2 children, teenagers and i asked how much it cost for thai people to keep a child. He said 1-2000 bath per child and month but absolutely not over 3000. Considering that childsupport should go to such things as food n clothes for the child thats probably quite correct. 3000 bath being about half what my superorganized and expensive country claims from a parent in childsupport.

Also can share the knowledge that it seems to be possible to delay the signing of the birth certificate more than 15 days if there is a reason. Dont know how that affects things in terms of getting legitimate.

Correct, getting the money is a problem in thailand as there is no agency to assist.

The mother might be ble to sue in the fahters homecountry, if the father is reciding there. Yes, that could be costly. But would also depend on the country we are talking about. Some countries allow for free or subsidiesd legal assistence.

And many countries are party to the treaty on child support and will recognise each others rullings.

Yes i imagine some countries more willing to help out. Some country is more in favour of the mother than the father, and so no where seem to be quite equal and fair. Anyway someone claim that its not difficult at all to get money from the father.

Stickman's guide to Bangkok Readers' Submissions Reply To Child Support And Custody By An Old CodgerAltough i think if the thai part decides to take legal action it will be a lose-lose situation where the mother will have to risk alot of money and will lose it if she fails to get the father. If the father is succesfully sued then he will lose all or a alot of his money as he has to pay all legal expenses, also for the mother. Leaves a probably broke bloke and a mother that might not have gained much. Would depend on how rich the dad is?

Would be very illuminating if someone who went trough this could share their experince, the fact that i never found anyone tell their story makes me wonder...

One should pay for ones children, and more so love and care for them. Best option being a part of their life.

Just a matter of what should be paid in my opinion when this isnt possible.

Thanks Mario, ur answers are always very clarifying and helpful.

Im paying for my children but a bit concerned about thai law and how things not exactly seem to improve for farangs over time. As someone pointed out earlier in this thread, laws could change and future risk should be apreciated as well.

What would be the possible outcome of a paternitysuite/childsupport claim? How much would the mother be entiteld to aproximately? Does her background come in to play, for ex previous lifestyle, or is that not relevant. How do they calculate what u should pay?

The ammount will be determined by he court. You pay the mother, but the money is for the support of the child. Not to feed or cloth the mother, only the child. Both of you are supposed to do that, so the income of both of you will be taken into account

I can't say how much it would be, but from several posts on the forum I understand the ammount would in general not be more then 10,000 baht a month. As said, it is to support your own child.

//

Yes ofcourse, money is for the child and therefore nothing to be discussed in terms of providing or not. Question is how much is reasonable.

In my country, that amount would be aprox 6000 bath and living cost are way higher than in thailand. Ofcourse thailand doesnt provide things free in the same extent as in my country or give other benefits to parents so i guess in a way more money would be needed here to give the child a good life.

What would it take for the mother to make a paternitysuite if ur not legitimate father, just named on b. certificate?

Thnxs

The ammount might be in the same area as 5,000 baht. I guess it would also depend on your income.

Your name doen't have to be on the birth certificate, although it might be help. She has to proof that you are the father, probably the court can ask you to do a DNA test. But they might also look at other evidence, like people confirming you 2 were living together as man and wife, people who might have heard you say that you are the father of the child.

I wonder how that work in reality. For ex thailand is said not to have a department for distributing such funds. No treaties are in place regulating this as thailand didnt sign up. Will the mother have to make a paternitysuite in the fathers homecountry? As i hear fatherhood should be decided in the childs homecountry (thailand). From their to actually getting the childsupport from the father could be difficult?Wouldnt that be quite costly if the father contest?

Never seen anyone tell their story about a situation like this.

Thanks Mario, ur answers are always very clarifying and helpful.

Im paying for my children but a bit concerned about thai law and how things not exactly seem to improve for farangs over time. As someone pointed out earlier in this thread, laws could change and future risk should be apreciated as well.

What would be the possible outcome of a paternitysuite/childsupport claim? How much would the mother be entiteld to aproximately? Does her background come in to play, for ex previous lifestyle, or is that not relevant. How do they calculate what u should pay?

The ammount will be determined by he court. You pay the mother, but the money is for the support of the child. Not to feed or cloth the mother, only the child. Both of you are supposed to do that, so the income of both of you will be taken into account

I can't say how much it would be, but from several posts on the forum I understand the ammount would in general not be more then 10,000 baht a month. As said, it is to support your own child.

//

Yes ofcourse, money is for the child and therefore nothing to be discussed in terms of providing or not. Question is how much is reasonable.

In my country, that amount would be aprox 6000 bath and living cost are way higher than in thailand. Ofcourse thailand doesnt provide things free in the same extent as in my country or give other benefits to parents so i guess in a way more money would be needed here to give the child a good life.

What would it take for the mother to make a paternitysuite if ur not legitimate father, just named on b. certificate?

Thnxs

Hi Chanook.

I have a newborn daughter myself in thai and been reading some on this subject. I know well how it feels, all these questions in mind about what is right and wrong to do and if all was done that should have been.

As i get it, if ur legitimate father than u have joint custody with the mother. With this comes certain rights as demanding the return of the child from who unlawfully detains him, as for example the grandmother. U also have the right to decide where the child lives and the mother cant change his place of residence without ur say. Id also guess ud be number one to have custody of the child if the mother would be unable.

Question is if ur legitimate, if u registered the newborn withing 15 days at the districtsoffice urself that should be the case. Not sure what would happen if for ex the mother was married to another man at this time.

Id wait to hear Marios words on this though.

Id be happy if someone could make clear the pros n cons of being legitimate vs just being on the birthcertificate.

Goodluck.

Joint custody means you share the custody and both can decide where the child lives, to which school it should go etc. Yes, you can demand the child from the granmother, but never from the mother. She has an equal right. That is where the problems start. She can decide the child stay there while you can decide the child stays here and both can change it. There is also no law against parental abduction in Thailand.

In case of trouble, the only way to go around it is to file for sole custody.

If the mother ws married, that person becomes the father. He can however denounce the child as his. I presume that in that case the father of the child can legitimise the child, but that is better asked to a lawyer.

Legitimising the child means that you become the father as far as the law is concerned. That goes to nationality and inheritance for example. It also means that child support can be claimed from you, but that can also be claimed in a paternity suit by the mother or child.

Another benefit is tht having a Thai child means you can hve an extension of stay from immirgaiton based on that fact, if you take care of the child.

Thanks Mario, ur answers are always very clarifying and helpful.

Im paying for my children but a bit concerned about thai law and how things not exactly seem to improve for farangs over time. As someone pointed out earlier in this thread, laws could change and future risk should be apreciated as well.

What would be the possible outcome of a paternitysuite/childsupport claim? How much would the mother be entiteld to aproximately? Does her background come in to play, for ex previous lifestyle, or is that not relevant. How do they calculate what u should pay?

I'm up to my knees here and can't think strait just out of misery, so excuse my foolish questions below;

If my name is on the BC and I went to register the baby at the ampur together with the mother, does that mean I have shared custody???

I remember signing that paper on the ampur but unfortunately I do not have a copy of it. I have a copy of the BC though.

How do I know if I'm considered as the one that has registered the child or if the mother is???

The mother and I have split up and we were never married.

Another question; If the mother dies or gets unable to raise the child, will full custody go to the father or perhaps the mothers family??? She has no parents, but has 5 sisters. The question is relevant as she recently went through major surgery.

What if she is convicted of a crime (fraud), would custody go to the father or her family.

Yep also relevant...

Hi Chanook.

I have a newborn daughter myself in thai and been reading some on this subject. I know well how it feels, all these questions in mind about what is right and wrong to do and if all was done that should have been.

As i get it, if ur legitimate father than u have joint custody with the mother. With this comes certain rights as demanding the return of the child from who unlawfully detains him, as for example the grandmother. U also have the right to decide where the child lives and the mother cant change his place of residence without ur say. Id also guess ud be number one to have custody of the child if the mother would be unable.

Question is if ur legitimate, if u registered the newborn withing 15 days at the districtsoffice urself that should be the case. Not sure what would happen if for ex the mother was married to another man at this time.

Id wait to hear Marios words on this though.

Id be happy if someone could make clear the pros n cons of being legitimate vs just being on the birthcertificate.

Goodluck.