BaanOz Posted May 31, 2005 Share Posted May 31, 2005 Hi, Be interested - especially from falang's who speak Thai... I don't speak Thai so am buffered by my wife when it comes to Thai chit chat and obviously my wife can't translate everything that is said and much she wouldn't want to translate anyway! Most of the time we spend in an outer suburb of Bangkok and in the country (Isaan). In Bangkok my wife has actually told neighbors (including kids) "please not to speak badly about my husband" (in front of us anyway!). Things like falang ling, falang kee nok, falang kineow etc etc. OK so I have hairy legs so the "falang ling" is OK I suppose! My wife thinks any falang married to Thai woman will be spoken about like this. Maybe any falang? Why? This also happens in the country as well as constant questions about money. How much money have you given your family? How much money have you given your Mum? How much money do you earn? How much money do you have? ...let me see! How much money?, How much money?, How much money?, etc etc etc My wife in the past have told people in the town to get away from us if they ask about money and the way she put's it, they don't come back to annoy. Older people get angry as they expect my wife to "respect" them and answer these questions. I'm not sure how to take this. I think it maybe a common thing among Thai to ask how much you earn (is it?) unlike in Oz. I would never ask someone I have only just met how much they earn. I don't even ask friends. Last time we were there we walk through the school yard and the kids started yelling the things I mentioned above and my wife said to them if you don't stop I will go to your classroom and speak to your teacher. These are kids that don't even know us. Why? Just curious if this is typical, not really bothered as I don't understand much Thai and don't pick up on it! Cheers BaanOz Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tarragona Posted May 31, 2005 Share Posted May 31, 2005 Last time we were there we walk through the school yard and the kids started yelling the things I mentioned above and my wife said to them if you don't stop I will go to your classroom and speak to your teacher. These are kids that don't even know us. Why? Just to pick up on this one point - well, they're kids aren't they? I'd be more upset if kids that knew me started yelling things. You're a novelty and they're enjoying the show. It's not really meant to be unpleasant and if you just waved back and said "Hello" they would probably all do the same. The teacher was probably standing there watching anyway. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bilko Posted May 31, 2005 Share Posted May 31, 2005 (edited) How much money have you given your family?How much money have you given your Mum? How much money do you earn? How much money do you have? ...let me see! How much money?, How much money?, How much money?, etc etc etc I'm not sure how to take this. I think it maybe a common thing among Thai to ask how much you earn (is it?) unlike in Oz. I would never ask someone I have only just met how much they earn. I don't even ask friends. Never noticed this behaviour myself. Try going to Nepal, they will ask how much you earn in your job, its not impolite to them, it's just their way, they may think you're strange not wanting to ask people in Australia. As for local Village kids shouting out " farang kee nok " and " farang Ling ", this I have never seen, most kids are too shy of Farangs to speak anything to them, especially in the Villages in Isaan. These are my findings anyway. Edited May 31, 2005 by Bilko Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BaanOz Posted May 31, 2005 Author Share Posted May 31, 2005 Just to pick up on this one point - well, they're kids aren't they? I'd be more upset if kids that knew me started yelling things. You're a novelty and they're enjoying the show. It's not really meant to be unpleasant and if you just waved back and said "Hello" they would probably all do the same.The teacher was probably standing there watching anyway. Good point! That actually happened last year and my wife just mentioned it today ...I didn't even know so wouldn't have waved anyway! Although, on this point, what's with all the respect towards older people! Cheers, BaanOz Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
meadish_sweetball Posted May 31, 2005 Share Posted May 31, 2005 It is fair to say that money matters is a VERY common conversation topic among Thais. Thais do not ask each other how much money they make, but the question is very commonly posed to farang - it is one of the top 30 questions I have gotten from people since I came here. At times I answer honestly, other times I just smile and say "enough to live by (พออยู่ไดู้่ paw yoo daai)". If they persist I will just say I dont want to talk about it. As for being shouted at, I have gotten "###### you" and "mother######er" a few times. I guess the little lads need to practice their English. Fair enough. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rags Posted May 31, 2005 Share Posted May 31, 2005 In Bangkok my wife has actually told neighbors (including kids) "please not to speak badly about my husband" (in front of us anyway!). Things like falang ling, falang kee nok, falang kineow etc etc.<{POST_SNAPBACK}> Not sure this is the best way to deal with the perceived problem. I would imagine that making an issue of the situation in this way is more likely to promote further unwanted discussion! Sticks and stones..... How much money have you given your family?How much money have you given your Mum? How much money do you earn? How much money do you have? ...let me see! How much money?, How much money?, How much money?, etc etc etc <{POST_SNAPBACK}> This simply sounds like an extension of the typical taxi driver / Farang disussion. Answer = Enough thank you Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
devildog683 Posted May 31, 2005 Share Posted May 31, 2005 the only similarity i see with my wife is she also has to tell the neighbors not to speak bad about me. they think because i am white she and her family should be living in a mansion and own 3 cars, when in reality we had to scrape together the cash to fix up the house they live in now and buy a fridge and stove . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mpdkorat Posted May 31, 2005 Share Posted May 31, 2005 It is fair to say that money matters is a VERY common conversation topic among Thais. Thais do not ask each other how much money they make, but the question is very commonly posed to farang - it is one of the top 30 questions I have gotten from people since I came here. At times I answer honestly, other times I just smile and say "enough to live by (พออยู่ไดู้่ paw yoo daai)". If they persist I will just say I dont want to talk about it. As for being shouted at, I have gotten "###### you" and "mother######er" a few times. I guess the little lads need to practice their English. Fair enough. <{POST_SNAPBACK}> They keep saying ''handsom man where you go'' to me. Not sure what to make of that. Worried that if I stop thy may ask how much money I earn... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tarragona Posted May 31, 2005 Share Posted May 31, 2005 Unless we're talking just about kids again, why would the neighbours want to speak badly about you anyway? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boon Mee Posted May 31, 2005 Share Posted May 31, 2005 Don't care if it's rural Sisaket, Ubon or Suphanburi the neighbors will be asking your wife: 1. How much money does your husband make? 2. How much money does your husband give you per week/month etc. I can't remember all the other intrusive questions rural folks will ask about Farang but that's the way it is no matter how irritating you find it. My wife's been asked those questions and more, time immemorial and I've sorta got used to them... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BaanOz Posted May 31, 2005 Author Share Posted May 31, 2005 Never noticed this behaviour myself. Try going to Nepal, they will ask how much you earn in your job, its not impolite to them, it's just their way, they may think you're strange not wanting to ask people in Australia. Hi Bilko, I suspected that maybe asking what you earn was not impolite to Thai's. My wife doesn't like though ...maybe she has become toooooo Aussie now!! Cheers BaanOz Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BaanOz Posted May 31, 2005 Author Share Posted May 31, 2005 This simply sounds like an extension of the typical taxi driver / Farang disussion. Rags, Jeez all the general questions here are extensions of extensions. Might as well pack up and go home aye. Cheers, BaanOz Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RDN Posted May 31, 2005 Share Posted May 31, 2005 I've never had bad language shouted at me (to my knowledge) - apart from the g/f , of course . In the country I get kids pointing and shouting "farang!" and even in the non-tourist areas of Phuket, kids regularly shout "Hello" and "How are you?" as if they are practising their English. Even in Big C, Phuket, one little 2 or 3 year old - who was being carried by his mum - just stared and pointed his finger straight at me. We got closer and closer until he was near enough for me to grab his finger with my little finger and I shook his hand and said "Sawatdee khrap" and everyone was laughing and smiling. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
expatinasia Posted May 31, 2005 Share Posted May 31, 2005 Apparently, the questions about money are an Asian thing. I've dated many Chinese women - they, their friends, their family constantly ask about money. It's consistent about their, and their family and friends concerned about welfare, and is not related to "how much can you be cheated out of". The questions are not considered to be abusive or "nosy" in nature. The Chinese, and perhaps the Thais, ask the same questions amongst themselves. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
meadish_sweetball Posted May 31, 2005 Share Posted May 31, 2005 Never noticed this behaviour myself. Try going to Nepal, they will ask how much you earn in your job, its not impolite to them, it's just their way, they may think you're strange not wanting to ask people in Australia. Hi Bilko, I suspected that maybe asking what you earn was not impolite to Thai's. My wife doesn't like though ...maybe she has become toooooo Aussie now!! Cheers BaanOz I think the "How much money do you make?" may be a question that clearly shows class. I cannot remember ever getting this question from middle class/educated Thais. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rags Posted May 31, 2005 Share Posted May 31, 2005 This simply sounds like an extension of the typical taxi driver / Farang disussion. Answer = Enough thank you Rags, Jeez all the general questions here are extensions of extensions. Might as well pack up and go home aye. Cheers, BaanOz <{POST_SNAPBACK}> Not at all - just saying that this is a common theme that you will unfortunately have to get used to I described it as an extension of the 'taxi driver' discussion, because whilst I have been asked many times how much money I make, I personally have never found a taxi driver who has enquired about my mother-in-law's finances Cheers Rags Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gallowspole Posted May 31, 2005 Share Posted May 31, 2005 (edited) Regarding people saying 'falang whatever' as you walk past: If they're smaller than you shout back 'nok eang go! lang kwai'. If they're bigger than you shout it then run like <deleted>. I often ask 'alai na!?' if I hear 'falang .........' and then something I don't know. Watch their face, if it's bad they'll drop their eyes - confrontation avoidence. If I know it's bad I say 'Phoot alai whah' right in the <deleted>'s face then tell him he is a 'nok eang ...'. It won't stop them saying it, just next time it won't be as loud. Oh, BTW if alcohol, gangs, 4 by 2's, bricks, cleavers, etc. are in the vicinity ignore the above and just smile. Edited May 31, 2005 by Gallowspole Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BaanOz Posted May 31, 2005 Author Share Posted May 31, 2005 I think the "How much money do you make?" may be a question that clearly shows class. I cannot remember ever getting this question from middle class/educated Thais. Hi meadish, Yes, from my wifes experience the money questions are mainly from older people in the country. In Bangkok we have bank manager, builder, Air Force worker. Middle class neighbors who do not ask these questions. Cheers BaanOz Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gallowspole Posted May 31, 2005 Share Posted May 31, 2005 When Thais meet each other for the first time they'll ask questions regarding money, job, family so as to be able to sort out who is of higher social standing. This is very important to them. This helps them to wai correctly, walk in the right place, sit in the right place, speak at the right time, etc. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bina Posted May 31, 2005 Share Posted May 31, 2005 seems standard thai question (same in israel by the way americans hate that!).... first question, how much money do lyou make, how many hours do u work , how much does the car cost? is your boss generous? etc etc..... after three hours i will ask someone, so, does this new guy have any kids? and they say, they didnt even ask... (how many children is a popular israeli question.... answer of one, or none gets u funny looks)... farang is the equivalent here (in israel) of 'hey, thailandi' (they all look the same and have inprounouncable names, no?), or 'hey, blondie'.... or, 'the american'.... every culture has its things.... dont take offense.... just answer funny style, and smile (puut len) .... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chownah Posted May 31, 2005 Share Posted May 31, 2005 I think all of the questions are just people wanting to learn about you. Take it as a compliment....its probably better than being totally ignored...although being ignored has its advantages. For the kids just learn some mildly impolite things to call them and laugh heartily as you shout them. If a kid calls me a ling I make chimpanzee noises and scratch like a monkey....if I'm in the mood...and then go chase them (playfully). Kids just want to have fun and Thais respect people who can laugh at themselves. For the money questions just tell them it doesn't matter...or you can't remember...or barely enough to pay the bills.....but the main thing is to stay relaxed and smile or laugh and don't you get tense or do stuff that makes them get tense....in Thailand the most important thing is for no one to be offended in a public situation....so even if you think their questions are offensive don't let it show ..... act like its funny and of no importance.....it is even better (from the Thai perspective) to lie to them about how much you make than it is to cause general discomfort in the social situation....at least this is what I believe about Thai socializing. The polite Thai person is always calm and smiling....always agreeing and always being agreeable. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boon Mee Posted May 31, 2005 Share Posted May 31, 2005 (edited) Never noticed this behaviour myself. Try going to Nepal, they will ask how much you earn in your job, its not impolite to them, it's just their way, they may think you're strange not wanting to ask people in Australia. Hi Bilko, I suspected that maybe asking what you earn was not impolite to Thai's. My wife doesn't like though ...maybe she has become toooooo Aussie now!! Cheers BaanOz I think the "How much money do you make?" may be a question that clearly shows class. I cannot remember ever getting this question from middle class/educated Thais. Correct. I'm referring to the real "Ban Nook" folks who wander over and start up a chat. I've never been asked re $$$ by middle-class either. Take that back...the very ocassional reference to another "friend" or "business aquantance" who turned them onto a plane ticket, comped at a hotel etc. I've had these dropped in conversation a time or two! Edited May 31, 2005 by Boon Mee Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
frenchFARANGbkk Posted May 31, 2005 Share Posted May 31, 2005 I think the "How much money do you make?" may be a question that clearly shows class. I cannot remember ever getting this question from middle class/educated Thais. <{POST_SNAPBACK}> Me neither. Sometimes I really wonder how foreigners can live in Thailand with uneducated country side people, especially in Isaan. Even though I respect them, I'm sorry but I don't want to live with them and have to deal will all those f*cking questions and attitudes everyday. It never happened to me in Bangkok. Is it love that makes you accept anything?! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gary A Posted May 31, 2005 Share Posted May 31, 2005 The older Thai people in Loei province where we live enjoy teasing me about having big money. I joke right back to them and tell them that YES, I HAD big money before I moved to Nong Hin but now I am a poor man because I have a Thai wife. It never goes beyond that and it is harmless. Even my girlfriend/wife knows very little about my financial situation. I'm not especially fond of kids and they know it so they pretty well avoid me. I yell at them. The standard Thai greeting is where have you been. In the USA you would get told that it is none of your business. Here I tell them that I have been out looking for ladies. You shouldn't be thin skinned living here. They don't mean anything by asking what we consider to be personal questions. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
toddy Posted June 1, 2005 Share Posted June 1, 2005 I think the "How much money do you make?" may be a question that clearly shows class. I cannot remember ever getting this question from middle class/educated Thais. <{POST_SNAPBACK}> Me neither. Sometimes I really wonder how foreigners can live in Thailand with uneducated country side people, especially in Isaan. Even though I respect them, I'm sorry but I don't want to live with them and have to deal will all those f*cking questions and attitudes everyday. It never happened to me in Bangkok. Is it love that makes you accept anything?! <{POST_SNAPBACK}> Never really had an 'attitude' as such from people asking those questions in my village. Love didn't make me live here - I chose to be here over Tokyo. Isaan is not right for everyone though and I'm sure you're not right for Isaan. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Oleg_Rus Posted June 1, 2005 Share Posted June 1, 2005 Love didn't make me live here - I chose to be here over Tokyo. Isaan is not right for everyone though and I'm sure you're not right for Isaan. <{POST_SNAPBACK}> Man, I love it - "saan is not right for everyone though and I'm sure you're not right for Isaan"!!! Can I use it on T-shirt ?! copyright, please ? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dazzler Posted June 1, 2005 Share Posted June 1, 2005 Most Thais with a minimum exposure to farangs, or a knowledge of our er.... culture don't ask about salaries, wealth etc. I've had the rare occasion when dating a young lady who has enquired about my financial status, and that has been both the first and last date with her! Many business acquantances, colleagues, friends etc. have assumed that I am rich and told me so in a friendly, conversational way, with which I have no problem. I used to just reply that I didn't have a serious girlfriend here cos that would be an expensive luxury, and most laugh with me about it! Suppose if I get near to marrying here then I'll have to demonstrate some level of wealth to satisfy the Family that I'll be able to take care of their daughter etc..... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
duke69 Posted June 1, 2005 Share Posted June 1, 2005 when they ask you about the money .... just say that you spent all your savings in curing sick Buffalos ........ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boon Mee Posted June 1, 2005 Share Posted June 1, 2005 when they ask you about the money .... just say that you spent all your savings in curing sick Buffalos ........ Yeah...that's a sure-fire excuse. Bet they never heard that one before! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pnustedt Posted June 1, 2005 Share Posted June 1, 2005 they think because i am white she and her family should be living in a mansion and own 3 cars, Actually I did buy my wife's family 3 cars and fix up the house and her brothers are frequently questioned by the police as to where the money came from. The neighbours do ask "how much" etc. and they are told to mind their own business. My wife's mother asked the same question and was told never to ask again or discuss our affairs with neighbours. I have had kids practising their English, they are delighted when I smile, wave and talk back to them. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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