paulsh Posted June 10, 2014 Share Posted June 10, 2014 Hello, My wife abandoned me and our child, and she is now unreachable ever since. Before she left she made it clear that she doesn't want (the custody of) our child and told me to fly back to my country with him. Our child was born aboard, he has an European passport and is staying in Thailand on an overstay tourist visa. He has also a thai birth certificated obtained from aboard thai embassy, but is NOT registered in a house book in thailand (he doesn't have a thai ID card). Two questions: 1) Can I just fly aboard with him alone? 2) What do I need to do to make the situation official so if the mother changes her mind in a few years she couldn't sue me? Thank Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
marko kok prong Posted June 10, 2014 Share Posted June 10, 2014 Mate sorry to hear of your woe,i can only imagine how you must be feeling,but i would think,if he has a European passport you would have no problems,as for annulling the marriage,did you get married here or in europe,in any case she has abandoned the child,so i would possibly go to the ask the lawyer section on Tv,they can probably help you better than here,but full credit to you sir,for taking on the responsibility,and my best wishes for your future. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
paulsh Posted June 10, 2014 Author Share Posted June 10, 2014 Mate sorry to hear of your woe,i can only imagine how you must be feeling,but i would think,if he has a European passport you would have no problems,as for annulling the marriage,did you get married here or in europe,in any case she has abandoned the child,so i would possibly go to the ask the lawyer section on Tv,they can probably help you better than here,but full credit to you sir,for taking on the responsibility,and my best wishes for your future. Thank you for the kind words. We are married both in Thailand and Europe. But it doesn't matter, I love her, she's the mother of our child, I pray for her to come back home... 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post Beetlejuice Posted June 10, 2014 Popular Post Share Posted June 10, 2014 (edited) Firstly, if the child has a valid up to date passport from your home country and your wife does not have legal custody of the child, then you can legally take the child back to the home country or anywhere within the EEC with no questions asked.Next, once back in your home country, hire the services of a reputable lawyer, immediately file for divorce and file a claim for full custody rights over the child on the grounds of your alleged desertion by the mother.It is possible that your wife may crawl out of the woodwork in the future making claims on any assets, property, liquid assets, demanding child support and alimony etc using the legal system in your home country and there is nothing you can do to stop her making such legal claims on the grounds that she is your wife or even common law wife and her right as the mother of your child. As regarding her alleged abandonment of you and your child, perhaps she had good reasons for her actions and who is at fault must be determined by a court of law.The bottom line is; first seek the advice of a lawyer in your own country and then you will have to go through the legal process of finalising everything between you and your wife and whatever the court decides is in the best interests of the child. You have no ways of avoiding this without the corporation and full agreement of your wife to lay no claims on you and the child in the future. If you still love your wife and want her back this still changes nothing. She has the option to divorce her husband at any point during the marriage just on the grounds that she no longer wishes to remain with her partner and if there are children involved, in 99.99% of cases, she gets the family home and the kids, even if there is a new partner on the scene, plus child support and alimony. The woman gets paid even if she is the partner that dissolved the marriage and still gets paid even if the male partner and her don't legally marry. So fasten your seatbelt, it maybe a rough ride ahead. Edited June 10, 2014 by Beetlejuice 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post NoThainess4U Posted June 11, 2014 Popular Post Share Posted June 11, 2014 love her still? ok fine, she doesnt love you how much pain are you willing to endure, and how much suffering must the child endure? love, in thailand, that is not required 7 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
paulsh Posted June 11, 2014 Author Share Posted June 11, 2014 love her still? ok fine, she doesnt love you how much pain are you willing to endure, and how much suffering must the child endure? love, in thailand, that is not required What is your recommendation then? Yes she doesn't love me anymore, but she did in the past, so there are chances that I can win her heart back... Should I keep believing and try to get her back? or should I forget her and move forward with my life? My choice is to not give up. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post jonesthebaker Posted June 11, 2014 Popular Post Share Posted June 11, 2014 love her still? ok fine, she doesnt love you how much pain are you willing to endure, and how much suffering must the child endure? love, in thailand, that is not required What is your recommendation then? Yes she doesn't love me anymore, but she did in the past, so there are chances that I can win her heart back... Should I keep believing and try to get her back? or should I forget her and move forward with my life? My choice is to not give up. i'm calling troll on this one! 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
iancnx Posted June 11, 2014 Share Posted June 11, 2014 love her still? ok fine, she doesnt love you how much pain are you willing to endure, and how much suffering must the child endure? love, in thailand, that is not required What is your recommendation then?Yes she doesn't love me anymore, but she did in the past, so there are chances that I can win her heart back... Should I keep believing and try to get her back? or should I forget her and move forward with my life? My choice is to not give up. i'm calling troll on this one!+1. Don't feed the obvious troll 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post Beetlejuice Posted June 11, 2014 Popular Post Share Posted June 11, 2014 Did you know that if a man and woman are in love the man is much more likely to sacrifice himself for her than she is for him? Also, men fall in love faster. These are in general, of course, but they're true as far as I've read and experienced. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NoThainess4U Posted June 11, 2014 Share Posted June 11, 2014 true, but men (me) have a pattern of "falling" for what we want to see in that woman, and not necessarily who she actually "is" and thus. the downfall of many a might man, Samson comes to mind 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post benalibina Posted June 11, 2014 Popular Post Share Posted June 11, 2014 true, but men (me) have a pattern of "falling" for what we want to see in that woman, and not necessarily who she actually "is" and thus. the downfall of many a might man, Samson comes to mind Words of wisdom. Keep those words coming. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ClutchClark Posted June 11, 2014 Share Posted June 11, 2014 (edited) love her still? ok fine, she doesnt love you how much pain are you willing to endure, and how much suffering must the child endure? love, in thailand, that is not required What is your recommendation then?Yes she doesn't love me anymore, but she did in the past, so there are chances that I can win her heart back... Should I keep believing and try to get her back? or should I forget her and move forward with my life? My choice is to not give up. The best way to win back a woman's heart is to let her see her have moved on. Don't know why...just know its the way their mind works. love her still? ok fine, she doesnt love you how much pain are you willing to endure, and how much suffering must the child endure? love, in thailand, that is not required What is your recommendation then?Yes she doesn't love me anymore, but she did in the past, so there are chances that I can win her heart back... Should I keep believing and try to get her back? or should I forget her and move forward with my life? My choice is to not give up. The best way to win back a woman is to let her see you have moved on. Don't know why...just know its the way their mind works. Edited June 11, 2014 by ClutchClark 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ClutchClark Posted June 11, 2014 Share Posted June 11, 2014 love her still? ok fine, she doesnt love you how much pain are you willing to endure, and how much suffering must the child endure? love, in thailand, that is not required What is your recommendation then?Yes she doesn't love me anymore, but she did in the past, so there are chances that I can win her heart back... Should I keep believing and try to get her back? or should I forget her and move forward with my life? My choice is to not give up. OP. the senior posters here have given you a 100% loser rating, but, just in case you are legit, I am willing to entertain you first, look in the mirror, then say to yourself, what you just told us, that "sure, she used to love you" now, turn off the light switch, it went dark didnt it? that is what happens to a woman's heart, when they stop loving you. now, turn the light back on, what do you see? you are alone aren't you? btw, she isn't thinking about you anymore, because, this process for her, started and ended a long time ago, you saw it too, but dismissed it, now, go find an educated female, any race, and tell her what you told us, then get back to us with the replies here is the thing about women, they, do not require love. they want it, but they don't need it. that is why you think you can win back her heart, as a last resort, go ask her father what he thinks This is the best explanation of it that zi have ever heard. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post 6thST Posted June 17, 2014 Popular Post Share Posted June 17, 2014 Time to move on my friend and time to think about your child and his future and yours... Good Luck! 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kingstonkid Posted June 17, 2014 Share Posted June 17, 2014 OP I agreet hat you need legal help not General BS from us. Mod can you switch this to Thai visa legal?? As to loving her. I am not the guy to comment. i was the one that flew away. But in my case I tried and it did not seem to be working. my suggestion is contact a lawyer here get full custody here. and once you are back in Thailand get full custody in your home country. She is gone mate there is not a whole lot you can do. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
star kicker Posted June 17, 2014 Share Posted June 17, 2014 Firstly, if the child has a valid up to date passport from your home country and your wife does not have legal custody of the child, then you can legally take the child back to the home country or anywhere within the EEC with no questions asked. Next, once back in your home country, hire the services of a reputable lawyer, immediately file for divorce and file a claim for full custody rights over the child on the grounds of your alleged desertion by the mother. It is possible that your wife may crawl out of the woodwork in the future making claims on any assets, property, liquid assets, demanding child support and alimony etc using the legal system in your home country and there is nothing you can do to stop her making such legal claims on the grounds that she is your wife or even common law wife and her right as the mother of your child. As regarding her alleged abandonment of you and your child, perhaps she had good reasons for her actions and who is at fault must be determined by a court of law. The bottom line is; first seek the advice of a lawyer in your own country and then you will have to go through the legal process of finalising everything between you and your wife and whatever the court decides is in the best interests of the child. You have no ways of avoiding this without the corporation and full agreement of your wife to lay no claims on you and the child in the future. If you still love your wife and want her back this still changes nothing. She has the option to divorce her husband at any point during the marriage just on the grounds that she no longer wishes to remain with her partner and if there are children involved, in 99.99% of cases, she gets the family home and the kids, even if there is a new partner on the scene, plus child support and alimony. The woman gets paid even if she is the partner that dissolved the marriage and still gets paid even if the male partner and her don't legally marry. So fasten your seatbelt, it maybe a rough ride ahead. for info, in the uk 'common law wife/husband' does not give you any legal rights over assets or property of your partner. you can live as man and wife with someone for 50 years but if you are not married under uk law you are not entitled to a percentage anything in your partners name. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
realenglish1 Posted June 17, 2014 Share Posted June 17, 2014 Your child has a EU passport Get on a plain and go Its that simple Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gdringjr Posted June 17, 2014 Share Posted June 17, 2014 "My wife abandoned me and our child, can I take him aboard [sic]?" Of course you can take him aboard. He can help bait your trolling lines. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wabothai Posted June 17, 2014 Share Posted June 17, 2014 Move on my friend !! She has abandoned her child. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
atyclb Posted June 17, 2014 Share Posted June 17, 2014 love her still? ok fine, she doesnt love you how much pain are you willing to endure, and how much suffering must the child endure? love, in thailand, that is not required Before the Phd's here start espousing their hypotheses and conclusions why isn't emotional and intellectual underdevelopment/ immaturity considered? many many adult thai women have minds of children or even less.... critical thinking deficit emotion and drama. why is not prudent to give her time and see what happens? just protect yourself in the meanwhile. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dfp Posted June 17, 2014 Share Posted June 17, 2014 Could it be she is in love with another guy ? 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jackspade Posted June 17, 2014 Share Posted June 17, 2014 (edited) I'm sorry to hear about your loss, but you need to stop whining about your lost sweetheart because she isn't Snow White and this isn't Disneyland. You need to be more pragmatic and less idealistic. You have two options at this point: 1. Keep groveling at her feet, hoping to win her back like a Knight in shining armor. Keep giving her all the power she wants over you. Consequently, have her lose what little respect she might have still had for you by seeing you prostrate yourself before her like she's a princess. Unless she's actually, literally the daughter of a king. Then go for it. 2. Man up and move on. Once she sees you've done that, she might, just might have a change of heart but don't count on it. By that time you should have moved on anyway so you should be either spending the next few months getting in touch with yourself or weighing your options for another, more loyal mate. Sent from my SAMSUNG-SGH-I317 using Tapatalk Edited June 17, 2014 by jackspade 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
belg Posted June 17, 2014 Share Posted June 17, 2014 without a written permission of the mother, might be difficult to get trough customs Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sirchai Posted June 17, 2014 Share Posted June 17, 2014 without a written permission of the mother, might be difficult to get trough custom Easy To Produce. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jonmarleesco Posted June 17, 2014 Share Posted June 17, 2014 1) You shouldn't encounter any problem taking him out of the country, though one can never be sure. 2) I should have thought better addressed by the legal forum. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jonmarleesco Posted June 17, 2014 Share Posted June 17, 2014 without a written permission of the mother, might be difficult to get trough customs You mean immigration. And I have done so numerous times, with a letter, but one which I've never been asked to produce. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ChoakMyDee Posted June 17, 2014 Share Posted June 17, 2014 Very sorry to hear that she left you and you still love her...it's tough, but you must put your emotions aside and be pragmatic as others have suggested. Get your affairs in order. protect your assets and think about the future of your son. You will miss her less and less as time goes on. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lapd Posted June 17, 2014 Share Posted June 17, 2014 Good thing his girl is different. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
enufsaid Posted June 17, 2014 Share Posted June 17, 2014 Jonesthebaker , calling "troll" on this one, why, the guy might not understand Thai women don't have the same affliction with love that western men do, but it doesn't mean he's a " troll" just means he was stupid enuf to believe shed love him "until death do us part" instead of, until the ATM card is empty . 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KonaRain Posted June 17, 2014 Share Posted June 17, 2014 love her still? ok fine, she doesnt love you how much pain are you willing to endure, and how much suffering must the child endure? love, in thailand, that is not required What is your recommendation then?Yes she doesn't love me anymore, but she did in the past, so there are chances that I can win her heart back... Should I keep believing and try to get her back? or should I forget her and move forward with my life? My choice is to not give up. The best way to win back a woman's heart is to let her see her have moved on. Don't know why...just know its the way their mind works. love her still? ok fine, she doesnt love you how much pain are you willing to endure, and how much suffering must the child endure? love, in thailand, that is not required What is your recommendation then?Yes she doesn't love me anymore, but she did in the past, so there are chances that I can win her heart back... Should I keep believing and try to get her back? or should I forget her and move forward with my life? My choice is to not give up. The best way to win back a woman is to let her see you have moved on. Don't know why...just know its the way their mind works. Jack Spade, also said it well, along with others. I did the same, keeping the door open, for more abuse. some women are tougher than us..it's not love..let her go.. I've seen my son once in 24 years.. my life is destroyed because of my weepy heart. do the legal stuff outlined here by good friends.. then can take him abroad. If was a girl, she might have taken her..then it would REALLY hurt.. aloha 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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