dotpoom

Is the OP suggesting that one might not be able to respect more than one culture at a time, why would a person have to drop respect for their own culture in order to respect another, it's like saying that one has to lose respect for oneself in order to respect another person.

Personally I try (sometimes not easy) to respect all cultures and people ......whilst bearing in mind that the planet and all it's inhabitants are continually evolving....it's the only way I can cope with what seems to be a state of insanity prevailing across the entire planet with people spending so much time and effort devising means to... and carrying out ....atrocities on each other...from the top (men in suits) down.

I cope by remembering that some are at a different level of evolvement than others....and eventually we will all reach a state of awareness and enlightenment where men and women will finally understand that we are all brothers and sisters and if one of us is hurting then the rest of us are feeling the pain too, whether we realize it or not. Me thinks that will be well and truly after my time has been spent here.

Even in this tiniest section of one society where contributors put posts on TV....one can see how some people go out of their way to hurt others.

Maybe a day will come when love and not hate will be the main driving force of all of us.

Caveat.....I am not a licensed "head shrink" ....and this is only my opinion from reading your short post...Please take no offense as I hope I am only offering you constructive criticism.

Well since your past seems to focus only on "YOU"....and you think every year that YOU have done nothing....YOU obviously do not like who you are....if you do then no problem never making anything of your life! Might be time to make some changes. You have stated that you do not want a family (Who many of us do "live for") But family can take many forms...Neighbors, friends and even strangers. You have to let go of the "me, me, me syndrome" and start partaking in life in another form than you currently are. Volunteer, Join some social clubs, become engaged with the community...make the world your "Family" ...Its amazing how rewarding it is to help people without expecting anything in return....

Hope whatever you do you change your path to one where you believe your life has some meaning.

Merry Christmas!

As the song says...."Took the words right out of my mouth" (Meatloaf).

Life is not about fishing the stream until it's empty....but about packing something into it.

I don't know why, but your story reminds me of my yearly visit to True Visions to pay a one year's subscription. For some unknown reason (which i still don't understand) it is never a simple case of taking my cash money and and just giving me a receipt. They can never find my A/C in the computer even though I have the invoice for the renewal in my hand. They then tell me I will have to phone Bangkok (I'm in a Pattaya branch). I tell them in return that they are a True Visions office so they can call BKK why should I have to do it. After a bit of twoing and frowing they eventually make the call while looking at me as if I was the devil incarnate.. then it usually gets sorted although on two occasions even BKK couldn't sort it out but they said if I paid by a different method they could do it
But hey...I call these problems "luxury problems" compared to some I'v had in life.

I'v had it for 47 years now, got it from firing rifles while I was in the army, since then the soldiers were issued with ear muffs, myself and many ex soldiers took the Dept. of Defense to court years later and we won our case for compensation.....they told me then there was nothing could be done about it and anything I'v read about it since has said the same thing. In the early years it used to drive me crazy at night time especially when everything was quite, then the sound (like a station off tune on a radio) seemed very loud. In the daytime it was less noticeable as they were other noises around almost drowning it out. I would leave on a radio or TV in order to get to sleep. To this day I find it very hard to hear people talking if there is any background noise like talking or music as in restaurants. But I have it for so long now that I have learned to ignore it. It was only when I read the OP that it became noticeable to me again.

I do hope you can manage to do the same if no help is available.....it will get easier to live with so try to bear that in mind. Good Luck.

As with all else in life, Christmas is to me what I make of it, i am fortunate enough to have had some fond memories of the efforts my parents made to bring the spirit of Christmas into our home. I also remember the church going and being reminded that we were celebrating a birth first and foremost. I continue with these practices to this very day and I am amazed how much my wife (Thai) loves the spirit of it all. Only last night she said we will light candles on the dining table on Christmas eve (tonight). I have a lighted tree in my front garden and have been playing Christmas songs by all my favorite singers (loud) and that really stirs me up spiritually.

Happy Christmas one and all and may you have a peaceful and prosperous New Year.

I had a girlfriend here for about two years before I met my wife. After we finished going with each other we remained good friends and still are even to this present day. I had always felt that she would make a fine companion or wife for the right man and I really hoped that she would meet someone nice and they could be good for each other. She didn't drink or smoke and had practically no social life...she worked at the Fr. Ray Foundation and had little time off. She had no English writing skills and only learned to speak it after she met me. I asked her would she like to go on one of the dating websites and if she did I would do all the writing on her behalf while she sat beside me and told me what to say. ...It was one of the most humiliating experiences I ever had and I dared not tell her 90% of what the guys were saying. I had filled out her profile stating what she liked to do Re: music, movies, watching TV, going for walks and what her ambitions were and all about her background and family.....99% of the men who contacted her never bothered to ask her anything about her interests or such like...they just wanted to know would she show her boobs, what does she like to do in bed, what sort of things could he expect her to do for him (in the bed) and so on and so on. I got really angry and told her i couldn't continue doing this (by this time I was telling them what I thought of them) and that she would never meet a man with me at the computer controls, better she got a friend to do it. She just laughed and told me to have Jai Yen (cool down). I got an insight what a lot of these ladies have to put up with. Lucky they have the mindset way of "Don't think too much"...but for me....I wouldn't have been able for it.

On the bright side of this whole situation, i;m not completely out of it, I have my last deposit coming in on Jan 2nd.

Wonderful! Then we can expect you to fly home?

Well, I can see how the spirit of Christmas is not lost on you! I do loathe these 'farang go home if you're out of money' posts. What the hell has it to do with any of you?

Everyone told me to go home 14 years ago when I had no money. It was annoying. Better off here with no money than there.

Today, I have no money too but different circumstances. Bought a house this year and lots of things I could cut back on if required, like private schooling for my kids and my extravagant eating habits.

How about a whip around, I'd be willing to throw in a hundred baht or so. It is the season of goodwill after all. I know what it's like to be hungry. Good luck.

Count me in.

Hospitality as welcoming all visitors is a must in my culture. Or rather it was. Somehow I have noticed that too many of my 'friends' tend to ride a one way street. Meaning that at my place they are offered the best of everything without reciprocation. I am only comparing equal means! After I applied the reciprocity rule the number of visits from some such friends have petered to next to nil.

Now I have less visits and less friends, but those that stayed treat me just as well and as generously as I treat them.

Hope this answers the OP question. Wander how many people experienced similar attitudes.

Note: no bars, no restaurant visits, no special occasions are included in these cases - just casual visits.

Yes ABCer,

Something similar to my case except none stayed. Just want to meet in a restaurant when they want to chat.

many cases, it is the wife of the farang that does not want YOU to come into HER house, even HE paid for it

I'll have to learn to NOT ask my wife her opinion belb....I read your post out to her (she's sitting beside me) and asked her if she is a wife like that.....her answer to me..."I not care how many your friends come around....it's you who gets angry when they not call....and when they do, you get angry when they not go after long time...".

To see ourselves as others see us.

Looks as if the old saying ..."The truth hurts"....wasn't far off the mark then.

Slow down lads ...one at a time please....or maybe your all celebrating the Christmas?

Well.....if i would be in the position to help the guy....i would do.

Seems like most posters till now on this thread are the 1s he is, rightfully??venting at, actually seeking support from. Well done for all the perfect planners in life who have never experienced "black snow" themself. Sad bunch of people you. For those 1s, to judge is better than try to help, especially when ur in the position to. I am far from a thailover but the thai way of dealing with the needy, on a personal way, is alot better than the judgemental western way.

Wouldn't have been my own personal way of looking for help, was in a far worse circumstances than he is for most of my life and if I were to judge my life today by the standards he sets as being a "successful life" then I think he would consider me as still being where he is now. But me...I think I have a life beyond my wildest dreams....all I did was change my priorities.

He says he believes in a "God"......he also says that he takes care of his family first.....then himself..... and finally God. My belief is that he has them in the wrong order. Make sure your relationship with "your" God comes first, then your family and after that everybody else. If you try to follow that path you will discover that you yourself have been truly looked after already. Take care of your spiritual wellbeing above all else and all the rest will follow......not the other way round.

Beetlejuice has the right idea, having it online, and you don't want any obvious farang input. Ultimately it is down to education, nous, money... you could have this thing running in someone's face all day and they wouldn't take a blind bit of notice. It doesn't help that the thinking is when one's time's up it's up no matter how one carries oneself and that one will be re-incarnated anyway.

But kudos all the same.

Maybe I'm missing something or I simply don't understand but I don't see how the "On Line" way would work. If I am one who continually rides around on my motorbike not caring or bothering to check whether I have lights or not.... why would I go to a computer and search on line for information about whether I should be doing this or whether I shouldn't..... and is it dangerous for me if I continue to do it?

The reason companies pay fortunes on TV advertising is because their message eventually gets to a large number of people whether the people are aware of it or not....it's subliminal..... With no effort on the person's part, messages are being planted in his or her head. Eventually people begin to notice them and along with word of mouth, gradually people become aware and hopefully would start to take it seriously.

OK, good idea, but who of prominence do you know in Thailand to gain permissions from? Plus you will require work permits and have to cut through all sorts of red tape to accomplish your project.

Can you afford to pay an advertising company to create your ad for you? Which involves special effect specialists, PR, script writers, road safety experts and advisers, the hiring of filming equipment, permissions to use various locations, actors or officials fees to appear in the video and fees to the TV channel companies to air your ad?

Sorry, but I think you`re living in a cloud cuckoo fantasy wonderland and not being realistic, unless you`re rich and able to afford all the resources to create and air your ad on TV. As for the rest of us peasants who will probably never experience having our days of fame on TV or at the movies, we only have the basic online facilities such as Utube and websites to get our points across.

If your motorbike safety ad is professionally made, with good quality video, audio and has aspects that make it interesting, especially if it appeals to the younger audience, people will watch it on Utube. It all depends on how artistic and creative you are. The question is, are you really proficient enough to make such a video?

Sorry to see that you don't like your idea being questioned beetlejuice...there's no need to get all bitchy about the thread. If you read my OP and following posts you would have seen that I said that the foreigners part would simply be to raise the money for the Ad,s...but the Ad's would be made totally by Thais from start to finish. I hardly think that you need to know a person of prominence or need a work permit for a bunch of guys to put some money into a bank account on a regular basis if they can afford it and felt passionate enough about it. Lighten up...if it's too expensive so be it...it was just an idea...no need to get your knickers in a twist.

Beetlejuice has the right idea, having it online, and you don't want any obvious farang input. Ultimately it is down to education, nous, money... you could have this thing running in someone's face all day and they wouldn't take a blind bit of notice. It doesn't help that the thinking is when one's time's up it's up no matter how one carries oneself and that one will be re-incarnated anyway.

But kudos all the same.

Maybe I'm missing something or I simply don't understand but I don't see how the "On Line" way would work. If I am one who continually rides around on my motorbike not caring or bothering to check whether I have lights or not.... why would I go to a computer and search on line for information about whether I should be doing this or whether I shouldn't..... and is it dangerous for me if I continue to do it?

The reason companies pay fortunes on TV advertising is because their message eventually gets to a large number of people whether the people are aware of it or not....it's subliminal..... With no effort on the person's part, messages are being planted in his or her head. Eventually people begin to notice them and along with word of mouth, gradually people become aware and hopefully would start to take it seriously.

The best way to do it is to leverage your money. This is how.

1/ find who is in charge of the government advertising for the new safety campaign to lower the death rate by 50%

2/ meet with him to discuss your a campaign ideas and how it will fit into there safety campaign

3/ make donation in a brown envelope, cash only

This is not bribery this is called lobbying, the same as the USA. For a little love you can get someone to spend

a larger amount of government money on a project that is very worthwhile, but just needs a little catalyst to bring it into focus

for the masses. The person you met with will get additional monies from various media companies to spread

the word. A win win all the way around. The campaign money will be spent anyway, you just want to focus the campaign.

Sound advice Ulic, Your post reminded me again of the Road Safety Campaign that I refereed to in my OP that went out at home and how costly it must have been and the people you mention would indeed need to be involved. The campaign itself was very effective and hard hitting with no punches pulled. i think a set of four different Ads. were made in each category of road safety,...like Seat Belts and Drink Driving would have been two of the categories. The four Ad's would be rotated every so often with catch phrases like "Clonk Click Every Trip" for the seat belt one and "Don't Drink and Drive" for the other. I do remember one of the Ad's for the drink driving (that's why it worked because I still remember it) had a few guys in a car merrymaking while driving around in a car and suddenly hitting something, then the car is seen flying through the air and lands on a little girl in a front garden whilst playing with her dad. It then shows the funeral with the grief stricken dad and all the family standing over the graveside with a voice-over from the dead driver with words along the lines ...."If only I hadn't etc".,

Then was also another set of Ad's telling people to stop the "rounds" system in the pubs. For those of you not familiar with that term....let's say 5 lads went into a pub together, they would each take it in turn to buy a round of drinks which meant even if some of the lads had enough to drink they would still drink more until all 5 guys had bought their round. I think this system may also be finished with hopefully due to this campaign. Indeed, campaigns can be very effective especially if shown at peak times or during favorite soaps...as in Thailand.

From dotpoom: >>>>the helmet really serves it's purpose AFTER the accident has occurred. ...Lights, tail lights in particular, on the other hand could almost certainly PREVENT some accidents from occurring. At least in the daytime if a person is not wearing a helmet you can still observe him on the road but at night time even if he was wearing a helmet, it would be of little or no help in making him visible to other road users.<<<<<

Fully agree to that. There is almost too much emphasis to the helmet issue. Helmet or no helmet is only a matter of the safety of this very rider and pillion(s). Whereas unlit vehicles at night, but also at dusk and dawn and rain are a danger to all the oher road users.

The light issue is a much more important one. Next thing would be education of road use. i.e. not to cut corners and not to overtake when you cannot see if there is any oncoming traffic. These are two points out of hundreds I could mention.

How about starting petitions to government agencies, police, schools, universities AND Television Channels to remind them of their duties to contribute to the safety of their own people ?

Thank you Maximillian, Jason and Bettlejuice, great ideas. I was glad to read your post above Maximillian, I was thinking my OP was turning into a thread about helmets and not, as it was meant to be, about the lights issue, but as long as all these issues are being discussed then that's a good thing. The problem of the "no lights" thing may not appear to be of the same importance as helmets to those who drive mainly in cities with well lit up areas and street lighting, but when you drive in the suburbs and further out it can soon become a nightmare. As I said in my OP, I'm convinced that while driving home to Bang Saray at least 35% of motorbikes and sidecars have no lights and usually wearing dark cloths.

I just thought that if enough people were interested and with the co-operation of a TV station (and other parties like the ones suggested here) that some sort of arrangement could be made for regular Ads to run to enlighten people to the dangers of not being "LIT UP"

At no time was i suggesting that it be made known that foreigners would be seen to be at the forefront of this...... Simply put..... Thai people making Thai safety Ads. for the Thai nation to run.on Thai television. The only part we would play would be getting it organised and those who could afford it and were willing could contribute X amount ...let's say monthly towards this very worthwhile cause.

.

Good Thought Dotpoom, but most of us are already contributing to reducing injuries on the road,, try thinking about it this way,, every time one of us gets our helmet stolen from our bike, in many cases as its a decent quality helmet you can be sure the new owner shall be proudly displaying it,,,, hopefully on his head rather than in his bikes front shopping basket

Hi Jonnyscott,

I do hope you are right, then I wouldn't get angry when it happens. However (and I hope I am wrong about this) I have always felt that it was more lightly to be found for sale in some market.

Maybe hook up with this guy?

http://www.thaivisa.com/forum/topic/677627-american-campaigns-to-convince-thai-people-to-wear-helmets/

Thanks for that Craig. As I mentioned earlier...I had considered the helmet issue but decided to stick with the "lights" issue for now.

I decided while helmets are a MUST for motorbike users and I find it despairing when I see people and even families riding motorbikes totally unprotected, the helmet really serves it's purpose AFTER the accident has occurred. ...Lights, tail lights in particular, on the other hand could almost certainly PREVENT some accidents from occurring. At least in the daytime if a person is not wearing a helmet you can still observe him on the road but at night time even if he was wearing a helmet, it would be of little or no help in making him visible to other road users. Thanks again for the link.

Each and everyone of us use the public roads, as pedestrians if not vehicle users and if we have families and friends they also use the roads, so road safety is in ALL OUR INTERESTS. ...I suppose we were all uneducated in the dangers of what we were up to in some area of our lives until somebody educated us or it was pointed out to us. Everything I know today was passed on to me by somebody else....even if it was only by example. As a result I think that the ones lucky enough to have received that education now have the responsibility to pass it on.

Good Idea DLock....and I suppose you're right about the cost. I was going to mention the helmet issue as well but thought I'd just keep it on the lights thing as a starter...Cheers.

PS........The thread seems to be a non-starter according to the overwhelming amount of interest shown so far, 555..... Ah well, at least I tried but thanks for your interest anyway.

Sure is a lot of sick foreigners posting on this forum too.

Not sure what you mean when you ask for Help.....do you want to convince your Thai friends that the English language is more difficult to learn by showing them this forum if the majority of us agree with you?