Stevemercer

Yes, Bangkok 'opinion' does not always hold for Thailand as a whole. What is acceptable, or typical practice, in Bangkok is not necessarily the norm in rural Thailand.

In rural Thailand the groom is expected to pay sin sod. It is a matter of face for the parents of the bride. It also means that the bride's family must accept you into the family for better or worse.

Assuming your intended has not previously been married, a reasonable sin sod would be about 200,000 Baht for a girl from the a poor family, and 500,000 for a middle class girl.

If you can't afford this much, often the family will accept less, but may make arrangements to 'borrow' the full amount for the wedding day to save face.

More important is the arrangement for the sin sod after the wedding. Wealthier families may return it to you or they may keep it themselves. Regardless, you would expect the family, rich or poor, to give your wife some land to build a house if you so choose.

According to Post #111, Russia is the third ranked country in the world for beautiful women? Other polls show it as number 3 for the ugliest women as well. What does it all mean?

We have a few of those bronze coloured skinks (Sun Skink) that live under furniture on the floor. They do leave their craps lying around, but they eat any dying geckos that fall to the floor as well as cockroaches and insects etc.

Too many attractive and available woman - makes it hard to stick to just the one wife or girlfriend.

'Scuba' is correct in saying you should always wear sunglasses when out in the sun in Thailand. I used to cycle without sunglasses (I didn't have prescription ones at the time) and would often end up with headaches and 'tired eyes'. Wearing sunglasses fixed the problem.

I'm very worried about exposure to the sun. I'm outdoors for an average of 4 hours per day cycling, working on the farm or travelling around on the scooter.

I cover up and apply sunscreen, but there are always times when I get caught out (5 minutes walk from the car to a restaurant, some crisis with the dog etc).

In Australia kids are taught from an early age to cover up, though not all do. I doubt Europeans get the same message given the different climates.

However, Thailand would be in the same, or higher, risk category than Australia.

I'm nearly 60 and haven't had any skins examinations yet, but need to start thinking about it.

Christ, that was a bit of bad luck!

The molam is usually held one year after the cremation, but is often delayed until the family can put together the money

I agree with the above. Tell them you will file a police report if they do not pay by a certain date. The police will issue an arrest warrant, for theft, that will be valid for 10 years. This means they will be arrested at immigration if they return to Thailand, as per standard practice, and will be detained for a court appearance.

You don't have to follow through on filing a police report, but if they play hard bastards, then you can put a bit of a scare into them and make sure they don't try it on again.

I've lived for 4 years now on the outskirts of a rural town in Mahasarakham Province (Isan).

The price of day to day goods and services has remained over that 4 years (which is good). For example, a can of coke that cost 14 Baht at a 7/11 is still 14 Baht.

Wages have gone up somewhat. 4 year ago, 300 Baht per day was standard for unskilled and semi-skilled labour. Semi-skilled labour is probably closer to 500 Baht now, although unskilled is still around 300 Baht.

The price of rural land hasn't changed much, but people's expectations seem to be through the roof. It's hard to get through to the average Thai that the value of land is only what people are willing to pay.

There seems to be greater consumer prosperity, at least on the surface. Get off the highways and people are doing it pretty tough (even though by the smiles on their faces you would never know it).

From my perspective, the main financial down has been the continued strength of the Baht against the Australian dollar. 

I haven't heard/read about anyone overturning a blacklist to date?

You can go through the courts, on hardship grounds, but this would probably take over a year. 

Can your family visit you, every now and then, if you meet them in a neighbouring country?

I think each prison has different rules about the maximum amount in prison bank accounts. I think it varied between 10,000 - 20,000 Baht. No, you cannot give food to inmates, it normally has to be brought via the prison canteen.

The Chief Warder and Governor probably know all the farang prisoners. If he stays in favor (e.g. sucks up and is helpful), he is likely to get relaxed privileges after a year or two. 

Unfortunately your friend has to tough it out for the first 1 or 2 years. It should get 'easier' after that, all being well.

You are quite right not to discuss the particulars of the case on social media. Thai officials can get prickly over this sort of thing and it won't do your friend any favors.

It is also true that it can be dangerous having access to money because other prisoners (and wardens) can put the squeeze on the inmate (if he is perceived as weak) to deliver ever increasing amounts.

A member of our family is in jail. He was caught, along with 2 others, in a crime. The 2 others pleaded guilty and got 10 years. They were out in 5 years. He pleaded innocent and got 20 years. He is still in prison. More recently he fell out of favor with a warden and says he was setup/caught with a mobile phone, a punishable offence. My wife complained to the prison Governor. Big mistake. The next day he was transferred to a prison about 500 km away with family visits suspended for 12 months.

Remember the prison wardens and officials are always correct. You must work with the system.

That is bad news.

He will be out in 3 years if he does not piss anyone off in the prison system. As noted above, the best you can do is to try and arrange a transfer to a prison closest to his 'support' network (if he has such a thing).

As you know, you can transfer money to his prison account. Having money makes all the difference in prison. 5,000 Baht a week is enough to live adequately and grease the wheels.

There is no point in spending money trying to grease the legal system, but being polite and friendly to prison officials will help with an early release and day to day living. 

Don't believe anything from Morgan Stanley. They are always trashing the Australian dollar because they can make big money if it goes down. These big firms are forever trying to spook the market to advantage their own investments.

Watching and enjoying a western movie (e.g. in English) together.

My Thai wife is always asleep after 5 minutes if we watch a western movie together. Mind you, she can happily stay awake watching Thai soapies for hours. 

My Thai wife had already been married twice before, when I married her, and had 2 kids. The head of the family (grandma) could not ask for sin sod, but accepted me into the family when I gave her a gift of 10,000 Baht. Of course, once she accepted me everyone else did.

She had never smiled at me before, but after giving her money I could do no wrong in her eyes.

Of course, it is more complicated than this, but the fact that you are willing to make a contribution to the family (via grandma) is a big plus in your favour. For example, giving her a gift of 5,000 Baht each birthday will make a big difference in her attitude to you.

Yes, the grandma is usually the boss of the family. If she has a strong view, then the rest of the family (including your wife) will have to try and keep her happy.

Her expectation is that you should contribute to the family to be fully accepted. Once you are fully accepted, then the family is obliged to help you if you ever need it.

Your contribution can be material, money of some form of merit making. In Thailand, money is an acceptable substitute for everything.

Maybe you and you wife can give a gift to your grandma to keep her happy. A gift of 10,000 Baht, if you can afford it, would go a long way towards her accepting you as part of the family. Give it to her on her next birthday or some other family occasion.

Thai women often seem to have the perception that western men are more likely to be faithful than Thai men. Maybe it is because ferang husbands, on average, are older and therefore less likely to play around.

Most Thai women understand that men are no better than dogs, sniffing after everything. Many are all bark and no action. Some really are no better than dogs. Others are able to show some discretion.

The things a Thai woman cannot tolerate (whether a wife, main noi or girlfriend) are:

• a man giving gifts (gold or money) to another lady (money that should go to her).
• gossip/talking behind her back and her being the last to know about her unfaithful man.
• Loss of face due to the above.

A Thai woman cannot understand why her man would want to have sex with a girl who is socially inferior to her. That is big loss of face.

If her man strays, gossips will often use that against a Thai woman, implying that it was all somehow her fault. This is loss of face again.

Many unsophisticated Thai women naively believe that if a man has sex with her it must be because he loves her. This is because she tells herself that she is having sex because she thinks she is in love. All this is huge loss of faith for a Thai wife.

Many Thai women don't seem to care whether or not a man is married. They just act on the spur of their immediate feelings and have no regard for long term consequences.

Have you posted on CraigsList (Bangkok)?

6 hours ago, GarryP said:

I will probably be retiring to Kalasin in a few years. About 80 kms from the provincial capital. My only concern will be keeping myself occupied.  Can't stand watching tv all day. I always need to be doing something or I get bored so will probably do a lot of cycling  and fishing.  May only sedentary activity is reading. Retirement scares me.  

If you are retiring on a sizeable allotment, there will be enough to keep you busy for a few years (planting and maintaining trees, landscaping trees and ponds etc). I still enjoy cycling 30 - 100 km three times a week. I've got plenty of different fish in my dams. You can stock all those exotics you see in TV shows like 'River Monsters' and 'Extreme Fishing' and indulge in a bit of fishing, or just fish-watching.

Thailand has few import laws and you can keep all sorts of exotic pets if you are into that sort of thing. You can even earn a bit of pocket money selling any babies (from the exotic pets).

One advantage in living in Isan is that the locals aren't habituated so much to tourists and you still get the rock star treatment.

It sounds like you would be living on a rural property rather than in the township itself? If that is the case it is more whether you want to retire to a 'hobby farm' lifestyle rather than a large town?

I live the 'hobby farm' retired lifestyle on the edge of a township near Mahasarakham. The lifestyle suits me and we can get all of our day to day needs from the town. So we have the benefit of living a rural lifestyle, but only 2 km from conveniences. It would be the same in Roi Et.

Roi Et is prosperous compared to other regional centres like Kalisin and Mahasarakham. But if you like shopping and variety, you will need to go to Khon Kaen. We live 35 km from Khon Kaen so it is not too far for a day/night out.

Even Khon Kaen is nothing like Bangkok or other tourist cities. It is 99% Thai with a few blocks near the major hotels dedicated to farang.

I've got about 6000 km on my bike.

It runs well and is comfortable, probably better then when new as it has run in. The economy is pretty good at just over 30 km/litre. The 13 litre tank lasts 400 km. The bike's tank and engine (mat black) still look good. The bike is comfortable at 100 km/hr on the highway and is solid with good visibility. The riding position is slightly laid back which suits me. It looks pretty cool to watching Thai's when you stretch the arms right out and lean back.

Mine sometimes stalls when cold, but starts again easily enough. 

On the negative side, there is rust appearing on the front mudguard, wheel rims and some other areas. 

I rode the bike through some flooded streets a few months back (about 30 cm deep) and the engine stalled and refused to start. Water had gotten into the switch on the side stand (there is a cut-off if you try to start the bike with the kick stand down). Anyway, after about half an hour it dried sufficiently to start. Back home I cleaned it out and sealed off the switch.

I took the bike in for its 4,000 km service a few weeks ago. When I next used the bike the neutral light would not go on and the bike would not start unless I pulled the clutch in. The neutral light sometimes comes back on. I wonder if the mechanic somehow changed the gear lever action. Obviously you don't need the light to tell when you are in neutral, but it won't start in neutral if the light is not showing (you then have to pull the clutch in to start the bike).

In summary, a potential weakness is the automatic cut-off that does not allow you to start the bike unless the side stand is up or it is not in neutral (with the light on). You can still start the bike in any gear with the clutch pulled in (except in the circumstances I described above). I'm tempted to rip out all the switches to avoid getting stranded somewhere.

I'm getting better at kick starting the bike, but it's still hit and miss.