Tod Daniels

WOW! !!

In following the events which lead up to his incarceration and in reading the articles on this thread; I had abso-tively, posi-lutely NO IDEA that extremely poor judgment (insofar as purposely wandering into Cambodia), and/or border-line stupidity (as in having a BAD history with HunSen and still doing it) fell under the category of "congenital diseases"!!

I also didn't know that medications were currently available to remedy these particular maladies!

Truly; Amazing Thailand, huh?

"Delight"; Actually the pic looks like the standard “teach-Thai-2-foreigners” format I’ve seen in almost every learn Thai book I’ve ever looked at. It’s always beneficial when the book you’re learning from lists new vocabulary BEFORE you get into the sentence constructs.

Still it looks about right; Thai with karaoke engrish to help you with the pronunciation. This is usually followed by explanations of the “why” about Thai in regards to verbs or word compounds (words which when coupled together don’t necessarily mean the sum of the individual meanings), although in the case of writing paper it’s pretty close.

While the O/P mentioned the speed of the spoken Thai in lessons, the example used by “Delight” didn’t appear to be speaking fast by any wild stretch of the imagination.

I wish the Thais here spoke in as metered a tempo and enunciated their words even half as clear . I’d be in tall cotton!

I always used to review a lesson first and look for new vocab, figure out how to say them and THEN listen to the sound files.

I would imagine the people most in the know about the Tourist Visa situation in neighboring S/E Asian countries are probably the ‘visa run’ businesses.

They are the above board businesses which specialize in lugging foreigners to various countries and securing Tourist Visas. They are NOT agents, they are legitimate businesses!

Here’s the top 3 in Bangkok in random order;

Quick Thai Visa Run - Philip

Thai Visa Service - Claudio

Jack Total Golf

Give ‘em a call and ask. I’m sure you’ll find one of them who can help you with your particular situation. ..

BTW: I am NOT affiliated with ANY of the above companies and provide it for informative purposes only!

I believe you are confusing the process a foreigner goes thru to get Permanent Residency in Thailand with the requirement of Hull to ask for a 'residency permit' to secure a Non-O visa. They are totally different animals, TOTALLY!

The terminology Hull is using on its website is what's leading to this confusion. They are using the term "residency permit".

Normally to get a "proof of residency" document in Thailand, you go to either your embassy or Thai Immigrations. Although last time I was at Changwattana they wouldn't issues a proof of residency document to an acquaintance because he didn't do 90 day reporting, he had a visa where he border ran every 90 days. He had to go to his embassy for it.

There is another thread running where I made this post about an email I just sent to the Thai Consulate in Hull;

Post with the email to Hull

It would appear from reading your post that you have a multi-entry Non-Immigrant Type-O visa (the one where you run-4-the-border every 90 days). That kind doesn't qualify to begin the process of P/R in Thailand. There is a pinned topic about it at the top of the forum if you're interested.

FWIW: As soon as Hull replies to my email, I'll post it in the other thread in its entirety. ..

Not to dampen the rampant speculation on this almost interesting thread, BUT. .. ...

Has anyone currently in the UK bothered to call the Thai Consulate in Hull and ask them directly?

OR

Conversely, has anyone bothered to send an email to Hull asking what criteria are now needed to secure a multi-entry Non-Immigrant Type-O or Type-B visa? Sometimes the truth lies somewhere in the middle.

FWIW: More out of curiosity than need, I penned errr typed off this email to Hull;

Hi,

I am a UK national and received a multi-entry Non-Immigrant Type-O visa from Hull about 15 months ago for the purpose of visiting friends. I see on your website this is no longer a viable reason to get this type of visa.

I do not qualify for another visa type, not married to a Thai national, not of sufficient age to retire, etc. I currently live here in Thailand, rent an apartment, bank here, etc.

I see you require a 'residency permit' for a Non-O. Can I use the letter of residency I get from the UK embassy here in Bangkok, or one I can get from Thai Immigrations as sufficient proof of residency? There is no such thing as a "residency permit" in Thailand, but there are "proof of residency" documents issued.

Also what requirements are needed to get a multi-entry Non-Immigrant Type-B visa? Can Hull issue a Type-B visa if I write a letter saying I am requesting this visa to look into business opportunities in Thailand?

Please advise me on the best course of action. I will be returning to the UK later next month and would like to secure another yearly visa.

Thank you in advance for your reply and for any advice on my situation.

Tod Daniels

I'll post what ever answer I get from them. It should be more than a few days. They're pretty speedy at getting back, at least when I've sent emails to them in the past.

NOTE 2 THE O/P: Sheesh, you must be desperate to stay here if you’d so casually contemplate marriage to a Thai national as the means to that end!!

Personally, I’d go the ED visa route. However, BEFORE you pay a single satang’s worth of your money, I’d talk to currently enrolled students, sit a free class, look at the material, etc. Granted the Ministry of Education only requires you attend class 4 hours a week (so it’s no great time investment) but if the method or materials suck, it can make for a very LONG 4 hours.

Good Luck.

BTW: I know full well there is a "residency permit" issued to "Permanent Residents" however people holding P/R status don't need visas from Hull to facilitate their stay here, and I doubt Hull even knows that.

In all the many, many times I've shepherded acquaintances thru Thai Immigrations, I've only came across this ONCE! The reason I even remember it was that I had to do it TWICE for the wife in the span of 2 months!

The guy was 52, met ALL the retirement requirements, and his wife was 46. We got his first yearly extension of stay without a hitch. However getting his wife first converted to a non-o visa, and then a yearly extension of stay based on being the spouse of a person on an extension of stay based on retirement was a little more of a sticky wicket .

Now this was several years ago, (so TIFWIW or as anecdotal evidence) BUT the officer we dealt with at Suan Plu Immigrations didn't seem to really know IF the spouse had to be over 50 or not. After a few phone calls, (a couple private powwows with the other officers) and some tense waiting, it was all sorted. In the end as long as they're legally married, and can provide the support documentation, the wife is given a yearly extension of stay based on her husbands extension dates. Its advantageous to do them at the same time so the person getting piggy-backed (carried) gets the full year too.

If they go this route, have them BOTH at least buy a single re-entry permit while they're there! (These people were too frazzled and didn't wanna wait in another queue).

If the hubby flies out without one his extension of stay is void AND so is his wife's as its tied to his!. Now if the wife flies out without one, just her extension is void.

I said I remembered this because the wife had to go to the US for an emergency (sans re-entry permit) and LOST her extension of stay. She came back in on a 30 day visa exempt and I had to go back out and do it all over again with her documentation AND her husband (who hasta be there with his passport, etc). Convert to a Non-O (2000baht), apply for the extension of stay (1900), BUY a single re-entry permit (1000baht) <- time saved if sheda done that the first time, A LOT !!

Honestly, it's been so long ago that I can't even remember what the extension stamp said. but I doubt it'd say "retirement" seeing as the person was TOO young to actually retire here. It might have said 'spouse' or something to that effect, but really I don't know.

I don't believe there'd be a problem getting a W/P with the correct paperwork from the company, but a call to the Ministry of Labor might sort it out. I don't know if this number still works but the Ministry of Labor's hotline for Work Permit info was; 1506

You might try Thai Immigrations at their hotline number; 1111. I've found the people who man the hot lines are pretty darned good at getting info for you (once you do the song and dance to actually get an english speaking Thai on the line ). I've had them even go so far as taking my number AND actually calling me back when I've asked them a particularly tricky question.

Good Luck. .. (Sorry it was a long post. ..)

While this is not exactly 'something on-topic' I thought it might 'fit' here as you mentioned you want to learn to improve your Thai.

I routinely buy the Thai language versions of Maxim and FHM magazines to practice my Thai reading skills.

I know that sounds like I'd say in the US, "I ONLY buy Penthouse for the articles.." lol, but really I do read Maxim and FHM here to practice my Thai reading comprehension.

I especially like the "Jokes of the Month", as some are quite good, and some are just recycled jokes written in Thai. For the most part the interviews with the cover gurls are mindless garbage , but some of the reader submissions aren’t all that bad .

This one I typed out as an example; (NO guarantees about the typing being correct, but it should be close ).

Now the first time I read it I understood it straight away, so it can’t be written in all that difficult of Thai.

Lemme know what you think. Is it written at a basic level, intermediate, or what?

Here's the Joke;

สามีภรรยาคู่หนึ่ง ตกลงกันไว้ว่า หากต้องการมีอะไรกุ๊กกิ๊กกัน ให้ส่งรหัสว่า “พิมพ์ดีด”

วันหนึ่งหลังรับประทานอาหารเย็น สามีก็เกิดความต้องการ จึงให้ลูกไปบอกแม่ที่กำลังล้างจานว่า

“ให้รีบล้างจานเร็วหน่อย พ่อจะให้ช่วยพิมพ์ดีด”

แม่กำลังเหนื่อยกับการล้างจานยังไม่เสร็จ จึงให้ลูกไปบอกพ่อว่า

“เครื่องพิมพ์ดีดเสีย ซ่อมยังไม่เสร็จ”

จนแม่ล้างจานเสร็จแล้ว หายเหนื่อยแล้ว ก็เกิดสงสารพ่อขึ้นมา จึงให้ลูกไปบอกพ่อว่า

“ซ่อมเครื่องพิมพ์ดีดเสร็จแล้ว ให้พ่อเตรียมงานไว้ เดี๋ยวจะไปช่วยพิมพ์ให้”

พ่อกลับตอบมาว่า

“บอกแม่ด้วยนะลูก ไม่ทันแล้วล่ะ พ่อเขียนด้วยมือเสร็จแล้ว”

Note to Modz and the O/P; if you’d rather not have this in the post, or if it is too “racy” please feel free to delete it. ..

I just didn’t want to start a thread called; "Thai Language Jokes", although maybe it's not a bad idea, there's tons of them on the internet, lol..

The information in the above post seems to be the lynchpin in regards to people just wanting to volunteer their time to help out at Thai schools. The schools are unwilling to put forth the effort to get you the required paperwork, due to unfamiliarity in the process but most likely due to just plain laziness.

It's also true MANY MANY schools all over this country employ and pay foreign teachers without providing them the documentation to hold work permits. If/when push comes to shove it's the foreign employee who're raked over the coals, rarely if ever the school. ..

It's sad really. There're a LOT of qualified people who would gladly volunteer a few hours a week of their time to help out Thai students. They can't because they're in the catch 22 of working without a work permit.

Good luck, let us know what the school says when you ask them for the documentation to apply for a work permit. I'll bet dollars to donuts they'll say, "We're not gonna pay you, so you don't need one!" That is totally erroneous info; volunteers DO require a work permit to do volunteer "work" <-note the last word there is work, hence the need for a work permit.

As a totally OFF TOPIC aside; given the overly broad interpretation of what constitutes ‘work’ in Thailand, what types of work are prohibited trades and foreigners can't work in them, as well as NOT being in possession of a work permit; I’m sometimes reticent to even use the “bum-squirter” in my house after using the toilet.

USA isn't on the list either, I remember when USA had a lower literacy rate than Philippines and Philippines doesn't even make the top 44!

Uhh, news flash!! The O/P's post is NOT about literacy, but about proficiency in engrish. Must be your second language huh? Keep up with those ESL classes they'll pay off .. Just joking. :jap: .. ..

Actually in outright literacy in their native language Thailand is pretty close to the top 'o the heap, far ahead of the US or UK. Although I'm more than a little suspect of any figures or stats which come from the government.

I do find it strange that the Phillipines doesn't make the top 44 in engrish proficiency as they're far more adept at speaking engrish than I've seen err heard around these parts. Then again, maybe they were exempt and considered a native engrish speaking country in this instance.

Are you sure 'drunk' isn't an honest to goodness second language . I hear it spoken all the time here by foreigners and Thais alike!

In an effort to bring this errant thread at least somewhat back on topic.

Quite honestly, this should come as a surprise to almost no one who even peruses the T/V forum sporadically.

Nearly everyone shouldve thought something like this would be in the wind given how hard the Thai Consulate in Lao was being hit for visas, especially since they reduced the 30 day visa exempt land crossings to 15 days AND given their 'soft touch' or liberal interpretation of the rules. It certainly didn't help having Tourist Visas being free as all it did was over work the staff. Reports I've had from people who were there recently said the place was a mad house in the mornings!

Weve been seeing gradual 'tightening up' of the interpretation of the visa rules by almost EVERY Thai consulate/embassy in the world. One only needs to look at the US and even Hull (which was a known soft touch for a long time) to see the writing is possibly on the wall about the way things might end up with tourist visa and other types of visas as well.

Still, two T/V's from Lao (with extensions) gives you nearly 6 months in-country, another couple from a different neighboring countrys Thai consulate (with extensions) gives you 6 more months. That's a year, anyway you slice it. A year is a year.

I can already envision the number of people lining up to enroll in a private language school for an ED visa!

This new news certainly doesn't bode all that well for the 'perpetual tourist' category of foreigners. Personally I didnt (and still dont) have much of a problem with foreigners living here yet playing the tourist visa game .

The rules regarding these visas were written so ambiguously and so broadly interpreted by the consulates that its only natural foreigners would use it to their advantage. I know if I was in their situation I would do it too.

Good luck all, hope it works out one way or another.

I just called two very well known and totally above board Visa Run Services;

Claudio at Thai Visa Service

Thai Visa Service

AND

Philip at Quick Thai Visa Run

Quick Thai Visa Run

They both said FREE T/Vs are finished!! Its back to 1000baht per single entry.

Now not being particularly curious I didnt ask about how many back to backs a tourist can get or how many entries they could get at a time.

However in an effort to be a kinder-gentler tod-daniels; you might notice I did provide the web links to them, so "enquiring minds" can find out for themselves, should they feel so inclined.

BTW: BOTH of those companies have packages where you can go to either Lao or Cambodia depending on your needs and how many tourist visas you have from a particular location.

FWIW: I didnt waste the time calling Jacks Golf, but heres their link too;

Jack's Golf Visa Run

Good Luck

As an aside; I am NOT affiliated with ANY of the companies I provided info for. .

I will agree with the post about self-study. It certainly takes far more discipline than just showing up at a school a coupla times a week or meeting a private Thai tutor.

However, as the O/Ps post clearly says he wants to get a handle on learning Thai BEFORE arriving here; perhaps (even mine and everyone elses) advice about schools, private teachers, where to buy learning Thai resources in Bangkok, etc may be slightly premature at this juncture!

If I can teach myself to read, touch type, and speak something resembling Thai; I know anyone can do it. It takes TIME and a LOT OF IT. Study, review, more study, go back and re-review what you learned earlier so you dont forget it.

Still Benjawans books while perhaps not the best methodology, are at least presented in a consistent manner. Her phonetics, while different, are still used in all but the last Advanced Learn Thai book, and in ALL of her c/d booklet stuff shes got out.

FWIW: I used this site to help myself learn how to read Thai.

Thai Language E-Learning Site

Its geared towards teaching children of Thai nationals who're stationed abroad (and who speak engrish) the Thai Language. It was developed by the Department of Non-Formal Education with the Ministry of Education Thailand.

You hafta make a user name and password but after that its totally free. Ive spent more 100 hours on that site working thru the various tests, chapters, etc.

Now granted its written for children, so the cartoon characters which explain the Thai language are a Thai gurl, a Paint Brush, and a Book. STILL, it does explain the inz and outz of learning to read Thai pretty well. Its also FREE and presented slow enough so you can take notes!

Good luck!

Again, SORRY for the long post!

Other posters have advised you on the most correct course of action.

About the best you can do is to "trek" (as in; sneak like you did already ); first OUT of Cambodia and back INTO Thailand.

Exit Thailand at a "real" border crossing, (you know like most people do when traveling between countries ). This will "officially" stamp you out, so should you ever return to the glorious "Land 'O Thais" you won't be flagged as "never having left".

Next; re-enter Cambodia (at the border crossing). Now, as you have an "E-Visa" for Cambodia you're gonna hafta use one of the borders which actually lets you in on an "E-Visa" as all border crossings DON'T accept them.

Here's the link to the Cambodia E-Visa site with the list of approved border crossings which let you ENTER Cambodia with an E-visa;

Cambodia E-Visa Link

Sheesh. .. Even though it says he posted yesterday; I really hope this is an April Fools joke! If the O/P really did this, it certainly WON'T be a joke for him at the airport in Phnom Penh.

Still, good luck, let us know how it all works out for you..

I would hafta weigh in on the side that there is NO negativity meant or implied by a recently met thai calling you over by using the engrish word; You. ..

Totally tongue-in-cheek to people who even remotely think its rude, I'd suggest; dialing back your sensitivity-meter a little , wearing a much smaller chip on your shoulder , or possibly doublin' up on your meds ) lol.

Honestly, all seriousness, err , I mean all joking aside, I wouldn't give it a second thought, as it's no worse than strange Thais hawking stuff calling out to you, "Hey meeter" (hey mister), or "Hey Bod" (hey boss).

On the whole, I've found Thais incredible at facial recognition, often remembering me months after we met, solely by sight! However, I've found them to be at the other end of the proverbial scale when it comes to actually remembering foreigners' names.

It took me nearly 3 months of drinking with the same group of Thai guys outside my apartment gate a couple times a week before they could all remember my name. And FWIW; it's just a single syllable name Tod (ท้อด).

I'd just deal with it. ..

You guys (and gurls) might find this story of interest too.

Sadly these are far from isolated incidents!! I’m sure they happen more amongst thai/thai goings-on than foreigners living here realize.

I watched a fairly successful ‘small scale’, fish, pig and rice farm be totally destroyed by in-fighting amongst the siblings. Even though NOT one of them did a lick of work or contributed a single satang to it save the youngest son.

The youngest son, who never left home, looked after the house, his ailing parents, and did all the development of the land, front loaded all the cost, worked it all himself, etc. When the father was about to die the rest of the siblings descended on the place and literally tore it apart in the endeavor to get 'their fair share' of the land.

About the only good that came out of it was the guy who'd done all that work, after enduring two weeks of in-fighting about the land; waited until his brothers and sisters had went back to their 'real' jobs. Then he harvested the rice, knocked down the berm around the paddy, caught/sold the fish, drained the pond, partially filled it in, and sold off all the pigs. He even went so far as to knock down the small concrete block pig-house. I wish I coulda seen the look on their faces when they went back up to 'claim' their rightful piece of the proverbial pie!!

It was sad for me to see that happen, because you'd never meet a harder working, easier going thai guy than he is. He was up at dawn, working on this that and the other thing all day, fixing motocy’s, iron-buffalos, sleeping in the hut by the rice field or by the fish pond some nites. He was really one of the hardest working thais I've ever met in almost 6 years here.

Now, almost 3 years after the father died, I had a chance to pass the land the other day when I was going up country. It's STILL FALLOW! All overgrown with weeds and not a thing has been done to it! I'm sure once the siblings realized they might actually hafta do something which resembled work instead of claiming their share of an already successful thing, they lost ALL interest.

The only good outcome was the youngest guy was able to take what ever he made from his 'close-out' sale and buy his OWN small piece of land, to restart. I spoke to him; he's doing well and thinking of buying another piece of land.

I say GOOD ON HIM !!

So, it's just not foreigners who're involved with Thais that this happens to. Although with a “foreign money-tree” in the mix the financial things can get skewed a little (or a LOT)!

It would appear, laziness, short-sightedness and all out greed knows NO boundaries; no matter the color of your skin.

With the evidently 'new' policy regarding 90 reporting being used at Changwattana, you can show up 14 days EARLY or 7 days LATE from your 'report on date'. That is for reporting either in person or having someone do it for you

Unless I'm mistaken (which I don't think I am) there is no grace period for leaving after your "due to report date". You most likely will be caught out on it once you return n after 90 days hafta report again.

In fact (to back up my assertion), last year I had an acquaintance not wanna report as he was flying out a coupla days after his 'report by date'; so he didn't, he just flew out. After he got back and he went to do his following 90 day reporting, the officer noticed he'd missed reporting BEFORE he exited the country the last time by a coupla days. Despite his claims that you get a "week's grace period" after your date; She fined him the standard 2000 baht minimum fine for it. I told him he was lucky, especially arguing with the officer, as I'd seen people argue about the fine and receive the 5000baht fine they have posted as the maximum.

FWIW: I'm sure the Monday & Tuesday BEFORE Songkran starts (11th/12th April) and the following Monday (18th) after Songkran ends are gonna be a TOTAL MOB scene at Changwattana.

However; don't forget about the Mobile Thai Immigrations Service offered on the 2nd & 3rd Tuesday of each month.

12 April - Buddy Lodge Hotel KhaoSan Road

19 April - Bumrungrad Hospital Soi 3

You can do anything at them which you can do at Changwattana; extensions of stay, re-entry permits, 90 day reporting, etc. The prices are the same as they are at Changwattana too. For people close to those locations, or ones who don't wanna travel to Changwattana, these could prove to be locations of value.

BTW: Don't confuse Thai Immigrations having a Mobile Service at Bumrungrad on the 3rd Tuesday of the month with Bumrungrad's own "we'll do the 90 day report for you; for 500baht" service that they run all the time there thru the hospital! They are completely different animals entirely!

Anyway good luck. ..

Sorry in advance for another long post. ...

If you're going for the 'governmental edict' look, you've got that pegged already!

ห้ามพูดอังกฤษบริเวณนี้

ปรับเงิน ไม่เกิน ๒๐๐๐

Forbidden to speak thai in this area

Fine not to exceed 2000baht

That is one fine post Tod. Thank you very much for your suggestions. The one above is my favourite. :jap:

Obviously I missed proofreading that suggestion, as my engrish translation is wrong, but the Thais right.

Sorry about that, it should say;

Forbidden to speak ENGLISH in this area!

Fine not to exceed 2000baht

Still, thanx for the thanx. ..

It’s admirable that you want to at least get a handle on starting to learn Thai before you arrive. I know foreigners who’ve been here 20+ years and still can’t manage to speak more than mangled Thai. Good on you!

Benjawan Becker has a three volume set out, you've already got the first in the set; Thai For Beginners. Then she has an Intermediate and an Advanced book too. She's also got small booklets with c/d's to improve your thai pronunciation, and quite a lot of other learning Thai stuff. Look at Paiboon Publishing, or Amazon who sells most all her stuff.

Start with the Beginner book AND the c/d. Those books are as worthless as tits on a tomcat without the c/d's because you can’t hear what you’re supposed to be saying. Practice, then practice some more. Realize you're gonna struggle, A LOT, but if you stick with it you will know some useful vocabulary and useful sentence constructs too.

I still know of schools in the Bangkok Metro area who use Benjawan's books as their course material.

Once you're here I'd scope out some schools, sit their free class, and decide which one meets your needs best. Don’t enroll in the first school you stumble across, they vary widely in methodology, efficacy, and quality.

Private lessons are certainly a way to go once you’re here too. In fact there’s no shortage of alleged Thai language teachers in Bangkok! However, FINDING a good quality private Thai language teacher here is another kettle of fish entirely. A native language speaker does not a qualified teacher make. I've took sample lessons from 15-20 private Thai language teachers, and they fall far short of the mark. Most of the time, they’re lacking material, lacking direction, lacking any real knowledge of how to teach the Thai language to foreigners (which ain’t the way Thai kids learn it believe me!). In fact, there's only a few I'd even recommend that are worth trying.

Right now, just go thru Benjawan's books, over and over. I've never met someone who went thru her basic and intermediate books but couldn't speak something close to understandable Thai. When I say “went thru” the books; I mean did every lesson, every exercise, every test, again and again, until they had it down.

I don't mean; page thru the books, decide what you want to learn and go from there. Her method does work, but you can’t pick and choose what you want out of those books. You either do her books in their entirety, or you might as well go get a Tourist-Thai phrase book.

Realize you're probably never gonna lose your foreign accent when speaking Thai, just like few if any Thais lose their Asian accent when speaking engrish. Take it in stride, concentrate on getting as close as you possibly can and you'll be fine.

Above all, DON'T get discouraged! Good Luck

Sorry for the long post. ..

P/S: for a good online Thai-Engrish dictionary try thai-language dot com. They also have some good learning resources too!

While this probably doesnt help you in your questions, I thought it might be of interest never the less;

I would interpret this phrase หลังจากที่ผมไปถึงที่นั้นแล้ว just as an overly wordy way of saying; "After I get there". I think the word แล้ว is tied to ไปถึง and used as a time (or tense) marker denoting something like "once Ive arrived already". I'd leave out the word 'already' in the engrish translation like I did at first. The rest คุณก็จะอยู่ไหน; "Where will you be?" is good.

The other one is quite straightforward using คุณก็คิดว่าจะอยู่ไหน "Where do you think you'll be?" with คิดว่าจะ being a compound construct meaning sort of like "think that (you) will".

I wouldn't have translated the English of either sentence into the order you listed for the engrish meanings.

It's my experience Thai is an event ordered language; things are spoken of sequentially without breaks by order of occurrence. This happens, then after that, that happens, then some outcome. Thats also why youll see Thai stack verbs, one after another in order of occurrence without anything between them.

True I could be splitting hares here, but I'da written it in English as "After I get there, where will you be?" only because that's how the Thai was constructed. Just like the second one I'da translated as "After I get there, where do you think you'll be?" Now would a native speaker understand the other two sentences insofar as I was asking about a location AFTER I arrived? Of course, but did it say that exactly in Thai, dunno.

I think its pretty subjective trying to back translate Thai to engrish, and vice versa. Different people might word it differently and still the essence of the meaning is there.

OFF TOPIC:

I only mention this because recently I took a "translation test" Thai to English for a job interview. Certainly showing up for the test dressed in Levis and a black KISS tour t-shirt showed them I don't think much of "dressing for success" . I mostly wanted to check my ability to understand and back translate Thai into something resembling engrish.

I got dinged (marked down) on every question where I reordered the sentence's sequence of events when writing what I felt the English should really be. Then again, this wasn't a creative translation test, but more a write in English exactly what this says in Thai sort of thingy.

I didnt think it was all that hard of a test and they gave us an HOUR to get thru like a page of maybe 25-30 Thai sentences with them getting progressively longer. Out of the entire group of yuppies who took the test and who obviously (from the way they were dressed), wanted the job FAR more than I did; I was in the top two or three people.

FWIW: Some people didnt even manage to finish it after the entire hour. What made me sad was you were allowed use your mobile phone's dictionary to look up Thai words you didn't know! My phone is way too old to have a feature like that, so I had to 'wing' it, lol. ..

Still good questions. ..

Sorry in advance for another long post. ...

If you're going for the 'governmental edict' look, you've got that pegged already!

I still think tongue in cheek, slightly self deprecating or things with sexual innuendo in the Thai word play works way better with the Thai sense of humor.

Here're a few other ideas I had;

กรุณาพูดไทย

พูดอังกฤษไม่เป็น

Please speak Thai

(I) am unable to speak engrish. .

Obviously Thais will know; you as a foreigner are most likely capable of speaking engrish just fine, but the ไม่เป็น will give it a more comedic feel.

What about a take on the "forbidden to smoke cigarettes in this area" or the "this area free from smoking cigarettes" signs you see everywhere, something like;

ห้ามพูดอังกฤษบริเวณนี้

ปรับเงิน ไม่เกิน ๒๐๐๐

Forbidden to speak thai in this area

Fine not to exceed 2000baht

เขตนี้ปลอดภัยภาษาอังกฤษ

กรุณาพูดไทย

This is an english language free area

Please speak Thai

Or maybe the take on the “NO Parking” signs

ห้ามพูดอังกฤษตลอดเวลา

Forbidden to speak english all the time

The wording may be worng <sic> errr wrong, as I just ripped it off what I remember from signage I've seen.

FWIW; my thai isn't nearly as good as yours, but I’ll get there one day.

In fact, to back up the fact my Thai is sorely lacking; I have a t-shirt made which says;

ขอโทษ พูดภาษาไทยไม่ค่อยแข็ง

I can't refer to it now as it's in the washing machine; so I don't know if I got the 'koi' word spelled right or not. I purposely made it to say ไม่ค่อยแข็ง, rather than using the word เก่ง. The term I used is actually slang which carries the sexual innuendo of having "erectile dysfunction". However, I've also heard younger thais say it where it carries the english meaning of "not very hard-core".

Still it gets laughs, breaks the ice, and gives me a chance to speak Thai to the Thais. That’s all I want anyway. ..

Good Luck.

I don't doubt the O/P's statement (or that of anyone else who said this happened to them).

I'm only saying in all the times I've been out to both Suan Plu & now Changwattana it's never happened to any acquaintance of mine I was shepherding thru the process.

Not a single time were they asked to show more proof than the income affidavit letter from the US Embassy. Over the last year I've accompanied more than 30 Americans, and every single extension of stay sailed thru fine!

In fact, not two weeks ago I went for my own extension of stay using the income affidavit letter. I was in and out with another extension based on retirement with nary a question or side-long glance. Sadly, I did forget to get my index fingerprints scanned and digital pic taken, so I made another trip out the following Monday and sorted it out.

FWIW: here's the PDF file from the American Citizens Services in Bangkok;

Income Affividat.pdf

Now, could Immigrations ask for proof? Most certainly, they can ask for just about anything they want as far as additional documentation. Have they EVER asked for proof from acquaintances of mine; NO!

Remember these are my experiences ONLY, your mileage may indeed vary!

I had both my 12 y/o Somali cats; Red Mother & Ruddy Boy who died last year cremated at Wat Khlong Toey Nai.

In Thai it's; วัดคลองเตยใน and here's their number; 02-249-3364.

Here's the website;

Wat Khlong Toey Nai

I didn't have the monk do the "water pouring, string holding, candle lighting, chanting" dealy because I told them my cat(s) weren't buddhist. However they do offer that service and they do a good job of the ones I watched.

The workers were deferential to my grief, the handling of the box, etc. I got all the ashes/bones back, washed, dried and tied up in a small piece of white cloth. (I now have them in wooden boxes on the top of my telivision). The temple even has a company which will make wooden pet caskets and custom made urns to keep the ashes.

I thought 1500baht was a tad steep for just a normal sized dead cat, but still they were thorough and efficient.

Anecedotally; while I was there waiting for my cat to be err, done; some Thais showed up with a dead Great Dane in the back of their pick-up truck. It had been in the sun a little tooo long and was pretty ripe. It was also rough watching the workers trying to bend, fold and tie up the body so it would fit into the furnace. Strange that the thais whose dog it was didn't seem to think anything of it.

Still, I'd recommend Wat Khlong Toey Nai with no reservations to someone looking for this service.

Here's another t-shirt I bought before I moved to Bangkok. I took it to MBK and had 'em make some up for me at 250baht a piece (Gave 'em all away a long time ago.)

On the back I had them put;

"In Thailand, I like Siamese!" with a cartoon picture of a siamese cat.

How is AUA doing these days?

I have been offered 30 hours for free by a friend who gave me a gift card.

AUA's still plugging right along. They're Thai classes have a lot of students in them and I've sat thru quite a few hours at their Bangkok location.

While I'm less than impressed with their 'passive listening' methodology, still you do get value out of them. They offer Thai reading and writing too, but if you didn't attend enough levels of AUA's classes you hafta test into it.

As far a price point, you can't find a more inexpensive Thai Language school to attend. Their bulk hour deals are the most cost effective in the Bangkok Metro area HANDS DOWN!!

I know people who LOVE going there and one's who well, don't love it so much. They are certainly entertaining to watch as the teachers are all top notch and are good at miming or acting out the meanings of new Thai words.

The three no’s; no ‘asking questions', no ‘vocabulary sheets’, and no ‘interaction with the teacher’ put me off of using it as a primary resource to learn thai.

FREE is FREE! If I had a 30 hour pass, I'd go!!