Elkski

21 hours ago, jacksam said:

 

I cant get rid of this Quote""?

That is funny... No flower no hotel..  How did you just go with the first one without having to check out some more>  That is just crazy.   I mean some digging in the haystack is needed to find the needle.

Well A guy From HK needs a hotel and he wanted it to be on a beach resort.. I mean Da man had a Jacuzzi in the room!.  Nothing wrong with that Romantic thinking.  Just let me tell you no sex in a public spa. I am certified to maintain mine and still think it best to take it to a  nearby outside daybed. or inside for a shower and water bed. 

Yes if diamonds on it never let it out if your sight even for 5 seconds.  My wife had her super quality diamond swapped in a flash.  Didn't notice for months but I had hand picked the first one to be inclusion free and all of a sudden we notice it has a carbon veil inside.  What to do then?   It was just a cleaning and at a major USA jewelry chain.  The man stepped behind the wall for 30 seconds we could still see his head.  He must have had an array of sizes lined up waiting to do this.  Probably his own crappy diamonds.  He probably stole 1000$. But did it result in my divorce also?

The dating sites are actually quite advanced these days. If she seems good and mutual  interest then you take the convo to the Line application.  Its like Skype but better.  You can create notes, photo albums. Send pics and videos effortlessly using a smart phone.  All photos you have ever shared can be pulled up in an instant.   With live video from anywhere you can really feel if there is some chemistry.   Of course with all online impersonal meetings you need to calibrate your online mental image to real life. I had a few  shocking dates here in the states but after recalibration and demanding to see pictures below the chin, not in a snowmobile suit it worked well.   But a new hazard has popped up.  Photo apps that automatically make a woman look great.  I'm not kidding!  Google it.  70% of all female Facebook pictures use a photo app

   They automatically remove zits, wrinkles and are amazing and I demand raw phone pics.   I get push back often but I demand or say bye.  

I know many Western men love dark hair, smooth dark skin and I have a also  talked to at least a dozen Thai  women who won't date another Thai guy ever again.  Some even told me they like men with lighter hair and color in their eyes.   

But it's a fact the World hates half breeds. 

Wow this tread is still going!  and a few posts hurt my belly ROFLOL.

Nick is still getting good advice about every 8th post.

Nick, Im glad you posted and I think that took balls or ignorance. haha   Nah surely you have read enough threads on TV to know there are vicious wolves lurking. and you were going to get trounced on.  And actually their advice may work for them if you like sticking it in a used, very used place.

Fore sure use Line or skype video next time and don't be quite so puppy dong like Bite once in a while and then be cute. . Just ask to see some more sexy pictures for example after the time is right.  I think love is a chess game  and it needs mental, emotional and sexual growth all at the same time.. Just think what online dating sites replace. If we met at the market, concert or bar you would see  how they fill out their clothes when they move. Also sometimes walking with a woman and no conversation is a pleasant thing or can be if your thoughts are pleasant and you smile. I read where holding hands only became acceptable in Thailand in the last 20 years so don't try that again. 

Also back in my late teens and college years I used the baseball game rules that my older buddies taught me. A "base a date" for sure! no exceptions or move on. Home runs at that time may have taken lots longer or never happened as I missed the free love years by 15 years. Its best if you get that first kiss out of the way on the way into dinner or the bowling alley or what ever is planned.  I used to do that after insisting that I open their door to let them out. Then just tell them you cant resist and little kiss.  That ramps up the whole date about 10 degrees.  But of course kissing in public in Thailand is no good.  But think about it if you show command and interest in her that will make her feel good. All women are so insecure so sincere compliments do wonders. as for baseball game, She may tell you she isn't that kind or girl and of course you are not that kind of guy but she makes you feel special and you just cant stop wanting to touch her she is so cute. Even if she keeps putting you off, keep trying. To be PC I'm not saying no doesn't mean no but you will know. If she really not likes it she will ask to end the date. 

you may have been doomed by the Hau hin tub but you could have just started to fill it up and tell her your going in and she can join with her suit or not or watch. 

lol What Soi?

I have daughters in low 20's...  I think I would be ecstatic with a 38 yr old. and I wont be buying anyone a house.  if she owns one I can pay rent.

1 hour ago, rogeroc said:

...So that pretty well leaves your choice straight forward, late 30's, early 40's if grown up kids, 44 to 45 if no kids....

 I guess you are saying that since I think I am wanting kids to be older I consider those women who had a child at 20 and so at 38 have an 18 yr old? Is early marriage and children very common? Hopefully child or children will be  college bound, I probably cant expect the father to be paying for this very often.

2nd group  are the women without children and cant have them so they need to be past child bearing  age so 44+ Do Thai women understand how fast the risk of complications for mother and or child goes up after 42+? 

I would never try to discourage a woman from the joys of motherhood.

Lots of good and varied observations/opinions.   

Can I say my initial impressions are almost to good to be true compared to the local dating scene.  And I'm not ugly.    

I wont go so far to make a spreadsheet. lol.

Ok forget my  lists

I know love just happens

I do think there is a difference between girls and women.. 

But based on my age, and things I have told you I was hoping someone would say you know there are a lot of women who's husbands dumped her and the kids at 30 for a teen. And many have made something of themselves and matured into great lovers that their Thai husband now regret losing.... or something... Maybe tell me that at 56 it would be crazy for me to aim for a 50 yr old and not 42 or 36?  

Your already helping me to understand this 20 yr younger concept.  It's so hard to grasp.  But of course most 38 yr olds attract me more than 50.   Compare this to the 59 yr old American women who reach out to me and are offended and get irate when I tell them I prefer younger as in 45-50.  Was just called a pervert yesterday by a 59 yr old.  

So I'm thinking how will a 38 yr old look in 15 years compared to a 59 yr old?   Hmm.  I may see the light. But is it a train??

Nice story!  Thanks.  Im not set on phuket as you can travel there easily.  I am not sure I could ever separate a mother and child like that.  I have talked to several who's children were being cared for far away by family.   

Part of the problem is I feel like a kid in a candy store.  Also hunting may have been a poor analogy.  But bait?

Thanks folks 

I really think my choice to focus above 40 is firm as is no children unless something else is super special.  I have met some 50 yr old Thai women with very nice bodies.    I was just asking for help deciding tge merits of various gals, careers or not.   I am not the guy to just fall for the first needle in the hay.  I also don't like breaking hearts by spending a couple weeks with many women.  It's all confusing.   I have learned much about Thailand in the last 8-9 months.  But realize it's a very different culture.  I have met old fashioned types and westernized types.  They all seem like normal women in private.  

I am guilty of over analyzing things.  So have 20 single years then 20 married to a gal 20 yrs junior sounds ok.  So your 65 and she 45?   But I am done making kids and will think hard before I help raise more.  In fact why would I choose a woman 49-50 with teens when there are many who's children are grown and gone.  A woman of 38 may be a nice idea but they will have children or want some. I would like to have a positive impact in a teen but that thought passes quickly.   I do worry that they love me like a winning lottery ticket.  

I did develop quite a few relationships online before visiting.  I am getting pretty good at correlating online personas to real life.  There are so many women looking for a nice farang.  I feel I should narrow my search dowm.   

2 hours ago, ScotBkk said:

Naw I don't hump Dinosaurs my friend
I love those young 20' something's they've more zest and value for money telling me all night I'm velly hansum

If 40 is a dinosaur to you then your young and can look forward to how a woman can improve with age.  I lived with a woman near half my life.  I like their company and to sleep next to a woman everyday.  It may sound boring compared to renting every few days but I think it's Safer for your health and more satisfying long term.   Once your both tested and monogamous everything goes el natural. 

Im Glad you posted your story.  your young and since you believe love can happen like this it has a chance.  Unlike the old farts here.  

I think your mistake was surprising her after a shift at work and the 2nd batch or flowers.   A woman wants to have time e to look her best to meet a new guy.  I also think women have desires and think just like men.  Your lack of advanced in private disappointed me and I bet her.   Women want a Take charge man.  And a man who seems to want them.     I laughed at the post above, but going around security and the direct approach of hot breath blowing through panties has worked well for me.  Shake it off and try again.   

I thought it was 1000 for short time and 2000 till her next shift.?? I am sorry but I am a germaphobe and may never use a hooker.. unless my future partner insists. 

I think I am used to top quality women ( mind included) and  may be aiming at a different demographic than most. I dont see anything but trouble as I go younger than 40.   Maybe the under 30 bug will kick in but I am done having kids. Dont plan to change another diaper in my life. Unless it's on my old partner...  lol  there seems to be many quality women who were tossed aside in their 40's by Thai husbands. Child support seems to be non existent but some of these women buckled down and did quite well with degrees and careers to be proud of.   SO I guess cal lme a sucker or something as I surf in the castaways. 

and where is the useful info in that?  I think I can tell fake O's thanks very much.  I think I was respectable but still sampled some goods. All this internet talk of man up and dominate the women..   I think I can hang and not be a pushover.   I do  think i am going to have to bring many hops and brew my own IPA as the beers offered in LOS was dismal. I did find one little dive near the China hotel that had some nice beers.  I dont use beer goggles any longer and wont use alcohol to trick a woman.. I have passed up many wounded quarry.  I am an ethical bow hunter type.  

Well considering my first wife and I were together for 30 years I think my thinking  can be fruitful.

I should add that I spent time in BKK, Ayutthaya, Pattaya, Rayong, Sriracha, pang gna, Koh Samui, Phuket, Hau Hin, Phitsanuluk, and koh Phi Phi.

I guess I am so new that I don't know what quality of women are within my reach.  So I guess I'm asking about who my target demographic should be considering my age and willingness to live part time in thailand and learn the culture. I have read enough forums to know that many of you are just trolls and sometimes I laugh.  I have thick skin. But please try to share your knowledge with me. 

Why do I need good luck?.. I don't believe Luck has much place in love and relationships. I do hope to fall in love but based on my past that occurs very slowly for me.  It seems that Thai women know so quickly.  I hope that didn't open up the flood gates of trolls? I hope to keep my  integrity.  Although sex is 30% of a successful relationship and  some just wont do! I am not into training from scratch or trying to change lazy habits.  With all the modern methods we now have for reaching vast numbers of partners online its a new and evolving game. I do think it best that I come to Thailand and live someplace and try to meet people in non bar settings. I know I should take my time to fit in some and that may bear the best fruit..  I have already poked my nose in it just on my initial visits.  I like the smell.

I am new here, I did look around and think this is the right place for this but a Relationship, love and romance section would have fit better.

I am a 56 yr old fit and healthy male from America. This past may started to consider Thailand as a place to retire and maybe even  place to find a long term partner.  This idea started innocently enough while researching for a scuba dive vacation in April 2016.  In America I don't think many people even know anyone who has retired, visited,  or chose a Thai woman for a relationship.  So this whole Thailand idea is a learning experience for me.  By training and career as well as personality I am a problem solver.  I guess my current problem that occupies lots of bandwidth in my brain is finding a partner for my next 35 years. I feel that 3 years after my divorce I am more than ready to know what I want and have my baggage properly stored in the closet.

So I'm  searching for dive sites and deals which led me to a discussion board where the OP asked if his salary offer as a teacher would support a decent lifestyle in BKK. Then on to  blogs and posts about some farangs good wife  and some farangs horror story and more info about costs to retire in Thailand.  Up next pops up a free Asian dating site. The timing of all of this was 3 years after my 30 year relationship with my EX ended and I was contemplating dropping out of the fast lane in USA and choosing a slower life style where I take time to smell each rose along the road. Why not combine scuba and a few dates and temples on my travels.

On to the meat of my rambling. no pun intended.

I have realized that there are many types of women in Thailand. They are as varied as the men who go there to seek them. 

I have never paid directly for a woman's love and don't plan to start now so I wont talk about bar girls. Yes I have made two trips for a total of 6 weeks and resisted the bar scene.  I did do Patong walking street one night and walked the beach road in Pattaya one evening after a dive trip but this was not for me.

As an american we are ok with dating a woman  5-6 years younger. but much younger than that and the stares and snide remarks begin.   I did not know that  women in SE Asia don't mind a man 15-20 years their senior, so I had focused my dating site attentions on 45-50 year old women prior to my two trips  with just a couple outliers down to 38 that I talked to. Yes, I admit  my fantasies ran a bit wild after getting 15-20 emails each day on the free dating site.. Of course I found out on this FREE dating site you had to pay to read the emails! So 85$ later  I had 3 months membership.  I think I am pretty good at sorting the wheat from the chaff and also I found stickmans site as well as other resources and warnings so I blocked the few that asked about my ability to care for them and family in the first or 2nd exchange. I also thing communication is important so IF I only got one work replies to my direct questions I politely said good bye.

I focused on non smoking, and not obese, not models attractive faces but something I wouldn't mind waking up to forever. Note here that I am sure some of the women I talked to or even ended up meeting on my trips would be considered out of shape by Asian standards and many of your farangs who have been in Thailand for more than 2 weeks..  I was unaware and still using 2016 American standards at this time. Not that I am ruling out a non model body in the future!  I am focusing on finding a  long term quality partner.  I think I weeded out all the bar girls/ sex workers but I am a trust but verify guy. Of course we all want innocent women with pro like skills so I don't mind past partners within limits.

So the groups of women I ended up finding and focusing on  consist of:.

1 &2) under 40 with and with out children at home.

3&4) Over 40 with and without children at home. children under 16 and over creates two groups.

5&6)   Those with great careers.   Either retired or really gung ho! and still needing many years to prove them selves in a career. "Stand on my own legs"

 common quote I hear.

Each group can be further divided by these distinctions.  College degree, or not,  decent,  good or very good English skills, Debt or pensions,  Job or no job while being mom, willing to dress in modern Western clothing or no way,

I guess I am asking about what groups I am missing and what groups I should be focusing on?

I have met some wonderful women and I am impressed. I am not dating American women these past 3 months since being back in the USA because they just dont interest me right now.  I am not currently on any dating sites.  I am more in a learning mode. I do keep in touch with some I met and some I didn't. I am closing out my affairs so I am free for long term travels and learning about visa's and many other things.

But on this site it says SETV requires both in and out  flights. 

http://thaiembdc.org/consular-services/tourist-visas/category-tr/

4. A copy of flight confirmation/reservation , showing going from US to Thailand and leaving from Thailand (The name of the applicant must indicated clearly)

4. A copy of flight confirmation/reservation , showing going from US to Thailand and leaving from Thailand (The name of the applicant must indicated clearly). 

I get this from http://thaiembdc.org/consular-services/tourist-visas/category-tr/

This is required for applying for a USA to Thailand tourist visa.    

So can the booking  dates for a RT be longer than 60  days  apart?  A confirmation means you have to buy expensive flights so you can cancel or change dates.   Maybe I need to go read visa threads for a few days?

But just this past July I was not questioned about my RT on major US carrier with 35 days in Thailand on the dates??  But your saying its best to  buy a one way from USA to Thailand and then just a nokair type cheap flight out at 30 day mark?   Or 60 day mark if have a tourist Visa.  Hmm.  

1 hour ago, steve187 said:

a tourist visa is valid for 3 months, so it has to be used before the expiry date, once used it is then forgotten and the permission to stay stamp that if important.

 

visa exempt entries are still good for 30 days at the airport and for some nationalities at the land border, but an air ticket out within 30 days is required by the airline prior to boarding.

So sometimes when boarding a plane in USA without a tourist visa the US airline will require you to have a return flight in 30 days?   If so and you plan to to get extension do you make sure you book more expensive changeable flights?    

So the 60th  day in Thailand on a USA tourist visa has to be within 90 days of issue of a tourist visa?    What the return flight rule?   If going to Thailand you need a return flight within 30 days?  But I spent 35 days in country this July on a 30 day entry visa and no one cared.   I did find out about the 500 baht/ day overstay fine the hard way.