48 minutes ago, Oldie said:

If someone with Corona sneezes next to you in the pool... 

Sneeze under water.

How many of you believed me?  I have proof now.  My Juristic Office has relented and I now have a picture of someone in the office showing me Google Translate from Thai telling me I can swim for 1 hour a day, but have to wear a mask.

Who wants to see?

21 hours ago, webfact said:

Over 100 organisations nationwide under the Higher Education Ministry are ready to take on employees who show good aptitude.

I cannot wait to hear the definition of what good aptitude consists.

18 hours ago, snoop1130 said:

“The cause of her death has not been revealed, but she had several wounds on her body and genitals.

Sure, nothing to see here.  It's perfectly normal, so don't question.

I also, did not honor or use a QR code in any bank or store I entered.  There was hardly anyone in the mall yesterday and it was a complete waste of time which I ignored justly.

Duck and cover!

2 hours ago, Rimmer said:

But try diving or doing the crawl with it and is soon fills up with water  ????

It is as close to waterboarding as you are going to get.

Or you can do as I did yesterday at Central Chaeng Wattana; I waved them off and walked in without producing a phone nor writing any information on a paper.

Stop submitting to paper tyrants.

2 hours ago, TallGuyJohninBKK said:

 

Tell that to Richard Nixon... He found out the hard way...

Are you OK?

Stadtler asks this, because Richard Nixon is dead.  Didn't you know?

We are now hearing news that China is locking down another major city due to the new outbreaks within. Why are not on the list of bad countries?

8 hours ago, BeltAndRoad said:

Then swim all you want minus the madness of crowds.

We have very low use of our pools.  Thais hide when the sun is shining and when there is no direct sunlight they make their children wear clothing from head to toe to hide from the non-existent sun.  Old Stadtler has never seen more than 5 people at either pool at one time.

The entire thing is ridiculous. This is Thai idiocy at its worst.

Lucky you.  Stadtler has a package sitting in JFK for over a month that hasn't moved.

Trump can fire anyone who is not elected.  Full stop.

End of discussion.  Move along please ...

1 minute ago, Tie Dye Samurai said:

had to do the song and dance at the entrance

First pushups by the nutty police and now this ... when will it stop?

Got a pair, thank you.

12 minutes ago, Davo369 said:

You can't get a water proof  N95 mask.. 

 Go to the diving shop and get the full diving equipment 

Fair enough, but how about one that would allow me do laps and not feel like I'm getting waterboarded each time I take a breath?

Old Stadtler knows what you are thinking, this is a windup or a troll.  Stadtler wishes this could only be true.  Sunday was supposed to be the day that the pool was released from its two month stasis but Stadtler was not pleasantly surprised to find that the pool was not open for business.  It's a lovely salt-water pool and we have two of them.  They are identically sized but with one major difference: one is clean and the other one is filthy. 

Really, that is another story but I did digress.

So when old Stadtler (not his real name of course) asked the good folks at our not so SMART condominium office why the pool wasn't open, he got an answer he was not expecting.  Stadtler has to beg the reader to indulge him just a bit and remember that this is Thailand, where anything is possible, and anything usually can happen.

The pool is closed still, because the condominium committee has decided that for liability, they cannot open the pool due to saliva and heavy breathing.  It was decided, that masks need to be worn at all times, including in the pool. Yes, we realize that some of you think this is a windup, but Stadtler can assure you it is not.  The committee cannot figure out how to make swimmers use a mask with the present supply of masks available.

Stadtler asked the nice condo manager if the board consisted of autistic or retarded individuals, but she only laughed wryly at the question.  Credit is given to our manager as she agreed that she is as befuddled by the ... decree .. decision ... edict .. all those words seem to not go with thinking individuals so use whatever word you would like.  Stadtler decided to humor the mentally ill committee members and pose the question here.  The idea, was to provide them a link in the hopes of shaming them with what we hope will be the likely responses.

So the question remains: Where to find a waterproof N95 mask and if not waterproof, one that won't degrade from being in the water.

1 minute ago, Susco said:

I would have thought that someone bragging about being an expert and having a truckload of Cisco certificates, would be smart enough to look at the image info, and discover that it was originally taken from an online source.

Stadtler methinks Susco doth protesteth too much.  You don't have to be embarrassed.

6 hours ago, Susco said:

Here’s what it is like to visit a shopping mall in Thailand during COVID-19

 

Talk about having too much time one's hands, Old Stadtler has to laugh and wonder how long SUSCO waited in line just to take this picture.  Stadtler really wants to know, did you go looking for a Thai woman pleasuring herself like the one in Hong Kong or some other non-China Country?  Or did SUSCO go for the little balls .. what do they call them ... oh yes, Stadtler remembers, Smeadish Weatballs

46 minutes ago, Aussiepeter said:

Heh Stadtler, I think you mean a '78 Holden Statesman Caprice, as in 1968 it would have been an HK and thus only a Kingswood or Premier (sorry, I'm a Holden guy), - the V8 Statesman was ten years later. (I also saw that TV guy warm a pie on a Statesman block). The whole lot in the foil, into the ashes, takes less time and tastes a lot better. Just sayin'. Of course, my Koori mates barbecue just about anything here in Oz, especially during lockdown. I suspect the monitor lizard though is cold-blooded like many reptiles and, was simply warming himself on the donk, just as many snakes do in Australia and lots of folks find out, usually the hard way after parking overnight in the bush ! 

Stadtler is definitely less confused than you are.

https://classics.autotrader.com/classic-cars/1968/chevrolet/caprice/100986888

Look at the oven on that baby!