MicroB

11 hours ago, nigelforbes said:

Theoretically yes, in practise probably the chance is very very low. If you have already built up antibody resistance via jabs and by catching covid previously, your immune system will deal with the virus very effectively in short timescales which means the window in which you could transmit the virus to others, is very small. The problem comes in when a person catches the virus and doesn't have effective antibody resistance and struggles for weeks whilst their immune system deals with it, that window for transmission is much larger. and longer

Good post. Its also the scenario in which the variants arise. The Alpha variant (Kent strain, remember that) probably arose in Dartford from an individual, likely either with Cancer or HIV who struggled to shake it off. Omicron came from Botswana, where one in three of the adult population is HIV positive. A new strain was observed to emerge in one poor sap in Boston (US) who spent months in hospital before succumbing.

4 hours ago, Banana7 said:

What will people do who have already bought, and paid for flights and accomodation that don't have the required number of shots, and plan to arrive in 2 or 3 weeks? The shots have to be at least 1 month apart, and ususally need to be booked in advance.

 

This new requirement for entry hasn't been thoughout properly.

They may have time to arrange for a Janssen vaccination; this is a single shot vaccine, but you need it 14 days before travel to Thailand. Recognised by Thailand. In addition,  if you had COVID-19 before, and subsequently get a single shot, of any Covid vaccine, that is also considered "fully vaccinated" by Thailand.

 

To those wondering about the effectiveness of the COVID-19 vaccines, based on what they read in the popular press, the vaccines with EUAs in US/Europe are generally considered to have about 50% efficacy.

 

Most vaccines of any sort are not what you call "sterilizing". Efficacy rates are based on detection of illness, not detection of infection.

 

We say the measles vaccine in kids is highly effective because they don't get the measles rash and they don't die. But as soon as you start looking for the virus, you will find it still circulating in vaccinated kids, albeing not causing illness, or causing a much milder illness.

 

The number of true sterilizing vaccines is pretty small. Hep-A, Polio and HPV vaccines are all very good, with efficacy in the high 90s%. The BCG Vaccine (TB) is 50-60% and has been in use for 100 years. Typhoid shots are 50% effective. A flu vaccine is considered worth deploying if its 30% effective.

 

Just stated for informational purposes. Not interested in further debate. Feel free to reply, but there won't be a response.

 

Firstly, apologies for what might seem to be a repetitive topic, and apologies if this is posted in the wrong section (not sure how this forum works). But it remains the fact that I only found this forum through trying to find answers to my questions and doubts. And I can't figure out the Search on this forum (yet).

 

Warning; this is a long post. Bear with me.

 

My story; I am approaching my mid 50s, all of a sudden, and on my own. I have a good job in the City of London, not paying the mega bucks of those in sales, but comfortable enough for a PhD. I started holidaying in Thailand in 2017, initially as a last minute holiday after finding I hadn't taken any leave for 12 months, and my usual holiday destination, long term friends in the US were deployed.

 

Didn't think I'd like a beach holiday, but I loved it. Fell in love with Thailand, I suppose rationalising it as feeling quite nostalgic; I grew up in HK and the Middle East, and in fact my parents took me to Pattaya in 1976, when there was only two hotels there.

 

Roll on 2022, and due to COVID-19, like many, I hadn't had a break in 2.5 years, so I over compensated with, for me, an extra long 3 weeks on Koh Samui, my favourite location (I pick quiet resorts, I don't go to bars). That extra long time, switching off from work, thinking about the previous 2 years, aging parents, lead to me thinking more about my future.

 

So I fell for a Thai Lady. A red flag for some perhaps.

She does massages. A double red flag for a fair many.

She is from Isaan, from near the Cambodian border, with formal education that stopped at 12 years old. Triple red flag I hear.

 

But like many before, I would say she is different. Perhaps I am a fool.

 

She is a divorcee with a 20 year old daughter. She is very proud that her daughter got a degree in accountacy, and is now a 20 year old manager of a 7-11.  If I was looking at this through Western eyes, I'd be thinking graduate recruitment, on management ladder, world is her oyster, onwards and upwards. But in Thailand, I suppose it might be viewed as a good safe job until you find a husband. But I can also empathise from knowing  my family history (don't do geneology, unless you are prepared to find 500 years of grinding poverty and cap doffing. It'll make the most Conservative have Socialist thoughts). So I like hearing how people break the mould of their families, and get a shot at social mobility.

 

Her ex-husband sounds an absolute scumbag. He announced he was taking a second wife, and that was it. Worse, he was her boss. She says she was at NEC in Bangkok as an electronics engineer; I think that was someone testing and repairing circuit boards, rather than anything else. NEC sent her to Japan for 6 months to train, and she learnt Japanese there (her English is atrocious, but we understand each other, er, most of the time).  Divorcing her husband meant she had to leave her job.

 

I'm not sure how to test the veracity of this; how easy is it to find divorce records in Thailand? The only proof of her former employment are some photos from her time in Japan, the one and only time she has been outside of Thailand.

 

Her parents are both dead, she says, and she is homeless, by which she means the family home has gone. I assume her parents were tenant farmers or something, and they didn't own land as such. So when they went, so did the house. Her older brother is dead, heart attack apparently, no family. She is all alone, she pleads. I sympathize with her. Later I think, basically because of reading various posts on forums like this, its all made up.

 

So tonight, on a call, I try a "nice" way to test this. I ask about her daughter, and she mentions she has talked about me to her. I asked what she thought. Her daughter approves as long as I am honest and not deceiving. "Deceiving" turns out to be a common concern that's repeated. I ask what her brother would think of me, if he was still around. Tears well up, snot, everything. What have I done. I feel a complete <deleted>. I tentatively ask about her parents, and then the full waterworks.

 

I'm pretty sure she is not acting. Is this the sort of thing that happens; someone from a poor part, Isaan/Surin, loses both parents and loses the "family" home. She has very clearly said to me that she has never asked for money off her daughter; I get the impression she wants her daughter to not be beholden to her.

 

So she does massage. How she got into that. She had worked at NEC for 15 years. After leaving husband, she and her best friend of 10 years (who apparently might also have a deadbeat husband, given she has two sons with her mother back home) decide to train in Thai Massage and Foot massage, and headed to Samui, arriving early 2020.

 

I've learnt quite a bit about the business of Massage Shops. Training for Thai Massage and Foot Massage are seperate things. Training costs 5000 Baht each, for a total of 300 hours, but in reality, they have to keep practicing all the time. They arrived on the island, got a job with a Massage Shop that gets a lot of 5 star Trip Advisor ratings, reviews with mums and kids getting their hair braided, dads sitting back getting their feet rubbed. Then COVID hit, and the Massage Shop went under at the end of 2021. In April 2022, her and her friend decided to start their own massage shop, taking over a defunct business.  On the face of it, because of COVID, they've probably spent much of the last 2 years yapping in front of a shop, rather than actually doing massages.

 

Again, through Western eyes, I would find this really admirable; two women, wronged by men, going against the odds, with entrepreneurial spirit More power to their, er, elbow. But from a Thai perspective, it might be seen as a safe job until Mr Right walks through the door. Is this a fair assessment? I'm not judgemental, because from what I understand, divorced Thai ladies have few prospects in Thai society. But I'm not actually sure they are interested in actually building up a business.

 

Despite a decent location (near the entrance to a Walking Street, and a future major US chain hotel), business has been lousy since they opened, even in June as restrictions eased. Most of their business are Chinese, Koreans, Thais and Indian couples. They basically live in the shop, with their cats (the reason I started chatting to her in the first place). I don't think they have two farthings to rub together. Her friend is lucky, in that she has a German septogenarian  boyfriend/benefactor who sends are money each month, equivalent to a good meal in the Fatherland. he's a retired lawyer.

 

The economics of the business; The unit is rented (2 rooms, kitchen and shower), with fittings, 10,000 Baht a month. The landlord is stingy, refusing to repair broken door handles, replace worn out air con. Electricity and water come to 2500 Baht. Shop consumables are probably another 2000. There's obviously only two of them. The most they can do is 2 massages @400 Baht each per hour. In reality, I doubt they would be physically capable of massaging every hour, and more realistically, a good day would be 3-4 massages per day.. For the massages, half goes in their pockets, half into the shop kitty. They need to do 3 massages a day to break even, with 9000 baht a month each to live on, with bills covered. That's ok, as they appear to eat very little (all from Family Mart or Tesco, can't cook in the shop because of the smell) and their only other regular outgoings are phone and bike payments. I'm quite impressed  that they take their shop seriously, making a point of displaying their certificates, and late on friday nights, doing the books.

 

The business isn't actually registered, but they "plan" to do so next year. Whether they  do or not is another matter, How easy is it to register a business in Thailand?

 

Bizarrely, I've now taken an interest in Thai Massage Shops as businesses, sorting out their Google Profile (getting it updated, some nice photos, making sure customers do their reviews) to start off with. She had a Muay Thai boxer in; I pointed out boxers actually need health massages, and they train in gyms, and know other boxers, who also need health massages, regularly. So now I'm offering marketing advice for a massage parlour.

 

She of course wants to marry me, move to England, open up massage business in my house. I realise a lot of this is over the top, probably driven by fear of missing out and an urge to please, and I've tried to steer her away from the M word, not because I don't think it s a possibility (I'd like it to be) but lets go a bit slower. I've told her though if she wants to do that, she's got to do better at  English, rather  than use Google Translate as a crutch.

 

I've already decided that because she is basically on the breadline, I'm going to help her out a bit. Modestly to start with at least; covering her share of the rent, which might de-stress her a bit. I've told her this is for the rent, but in reality, I can't help how she decides to spend the money.

 

I have explained to her that if she want's to come to the UK, its really important for her to build up the business, show its a viable concern, because that would help the visa process. I'm helping her with the rent, but the surplus she should at least use some of it in the business, such as buy a new 16,000 Baht AC. I hope that's the right approach to take. Or is it going to be ignored? To me, its a small amount, and if I had a girlfriend back home, I'd spend at least the same on dinners out etc, with the same benefit. That's how I rationalise it.

 

She may well spend it on herself. When I last left, I gave her some money, and she promptly headed to a dermatology clinic on the mainland, for, I thought at first, some Botox. but it transpired, to sort a pigment problem found in a lot of Isaan women who want to stay fair. Rampant use of steroid cream in Thailand, to whiten skin, has lead to problems with "black spots" or freckles. She has trmendous low self esteeml is this a common trait in Thailand?

 

I don't know how I can dissuade her (with foundation on, I don't notice a thing) or whether I should. Luckily, she hasn't the money (yet) for the further treatments her doctor is recommending (Thai doctors don't tell their patients what they are injecting them with).

 

Her age is somewhat of a mystery, and I don't know how common it is in Thailand for ladies not to know their age. I got a copy of her ID card; I needed the correct English spelling of her name to arrange a money transfer (turned out they don't care about the name). The ID card stated she was born in 1974. I said "you're only 6 years younger than me". Her reply was her mum made a mistake, and she is 42. I wasn't sure how 1974 became 1980, but though, maybe it was a mistake in the Thai date. Then it becomes 1984. It doesn't matter to me, and I've told her that. She's not a Spermodel, but if she was 48, she'd be an incredible good looking 48. The major significance would be at age 48, kids would be off the agenda, at age 42, probably not a good idea, age 38; ticking biological clock.

 

Anyone any thoughts about this (the age mystery); is it worth pressing, or just leave it?

 

Her social media skills are rubbish. When we met, she wanted to connect with me on WeChat. I was game, but she was hopeless at this, not realising that on WeChat, I need to install the App, then she, as a WeChat account, needed to invite me, via a QR code. She gave up on that, and we communicate daily (morning, day, night) via FB Messenger. And as for Facebook; I know she has at least 3 accounts (easy to find, as they are all on her name). She doesn't know I know, and I don't know whether I should mention it or not. The other accounts were last used in 2020 and 2021, with few friends. The only posts are shared lost and found cat ads.

 

My mum has 6 Facebook accounts as she keeps forgotting her password/email, and just sets a new one up instead, and thinks comments on posts are private.... So it could just be that, or is it common for Thai ladies to have multiple accounts?

 

Thankyou for making it this far. If it's boring, I apologise.  I will read and take seriously all comments, but I may not respond.