How Do You Speak To Your Thai So?

[daveh]

I am curious how people communicate with their Thai girlfriend's or boyfriends. I don't speak Thai well enough to communicate with my gf in Thai, so we use English, well, ... sort of.

The problem is, I end up using pigeon English. Basically, end up using present tense when I should be using other tenses, and dropping articles.

I believe I do this because it is the fastest means of communication. If I speak perfect English (as if I could) to her, then I feel she gets bogged down in some of the "useless" words and I would have to explain many of my sentences. So I opt for the easy way out and speak to her in a way I think she can understand.

I think this is not good for her at all. We are applying for a fiancée visa for her and I worry that when she arrives in America, she won't be able to understand other people who speak to her.

I would like to break myself of this habit, but every time I try, I usually get frustrated while trying to speak with her, then I breakdown and revert to pigeon English.

Does anybody else have this problem? Of did you have it in the past and it got better?

[Richard W]

In a way, I had it worse. We were still speaking Thai when my wife came to England. (I think she was choosing her words carefully so I could understand her.) However, I always made a point of speaking proper English to her, so as to give her an example.

The trick, which is not easy, is not to rely on grammatical subtleties to convey meaning. (I am still trying to work out why we misinterpreted, 'My Thai girlfriend's pregnant. She has dropped out of high school.') I still can't rely on my wife to understand, 'Have you Xed?'.

[Erawan]

Lol, sorry thought there was a problem with the topic title. I thought it got cut off at 'so', so was 'son' or 'sow' (lol, I dunno), but then I realised that this forum capitalises all the first letters, so it stands for 'significant other'. I'll shut up now...

[Totster]

I am curious how people communicate with their Thai girlfriend's or boyfriends. I don't speak Thai well enough to communicate with my gf in Thai, so we use English, well, ... sort of.

The problem is, I end up using pigeon English. Basically, end up using present tense when I should be using other tenses, and dropping articles.

Daveh.. .I have exactly the same problem, when I speak to my TGF and my mates are listening the say I sound stupid and why do I do it... ?

The answer is of course that this is the only way to communicate effectively on the phone, like you say, if I speak to he in the way I normally speak to fellow English speakers she would not understand what I am saying (even if I slow the speech right down).

Examples of what i may say to her are..

What you do today ?

What you eat today ?

Where your sister go ?

What time I call you later ?

I so happy..

not good ....

I think this is not good for her at all. We are applying for a fiancée visa for her and I worry that when she arrives in America, she won't be able to understand other people who speak to her.

I would like to break myself of this habit, but every time I try, I usually get frustrated while trying to speak with her, then I breakdown and revert to pigeon English.

I understand also that this is not good for her if she wants to improve her English, but I don't see any other way..

I will be spending quite a long time with her soon and will be able to spend some time helping her with her English language skills, something she is very keen to do, I will use this opportunity when I am actually with her to take the time to talk with her in proper english, and explaining answers to any questions she has, something I'm reluctant to do when paying for a phonecall, and I will also try my hardest not to use pigeon English (although this in itself is hard, like you said it's a habit), In return she will help with my Thai language skills.

totster

[Spee]

I am curious how people communicate with their Thai girlfriend's or boyfriends.

Our combinations are a mixture of Thai, English and Japanese. I knew zero Thai when we met, so initial communications were tricky. The few disagreements we've had, were caused by language misunderstandings (e.g., confusion between the words "no" and "know").

I've been working on my Thai and I've provided her with several Thai/English books to help her with her English. She is getting better at English faster than I am with Thai, though I hope to be starting a language class next week. We're about even on the Japanese, and only use it to fill in the occasional holes.

I just treat it as one more thing in the relationship that needs constant work, and constant patience to deal with misunderstandings and sometimes having to say things a few different ways to get a point across. I always carry a Thai/English English/Thai dictionary with me. It's slow and crude but it does help.

We get a lot of use from these phrases (sorry for the poor transliteration):

- Mai kao jai (I don't understand)

- Kao jai (I understand)

- Kao jai mai (do you understand)

Same goes for "kit theung" (miss you) and "rak mahk" (much love).

On the plus side, when I'm working around all of my english-speaking colleagues, it is always good to mix up the language when I don't want them to eavesdrop on what I'm saying.

[Pink Mist]

My Wife could understand English reasonably well when we first met but the way we Aussies speak was another level of understanding for her. I had to learn to slow down and speak words singly rather than turning a sentence into one word.

We used to have our stumbling blocks but we have 5 good quality "Thai><English" books, which are fairly well worn now.

As I wrote in another thread the Goverment here offers 520 hours of free tuition to Spouse migrants and that has been a positive.

[warriors]

Never knew that Bronco re 520 free hours learning. Now all I need is to find a good lady on my next trip in Nov lol. Pom kit finding phuying narrack will be harder than the 520 hours in a school. Oh and us Kiwis talk even stranger than Aussies

[Pink Mist]

I might have misled you a bit W, I meant the Oz gov.

[warriors]

Never trust an Aussie lol thanks (ned kelly) I thought nothing for free in LOS except the clap

[Tufty]

I usually speak to my girl in simple terms she can understand if I need to get the point across quickly

Some time ago I sent her to school so she can read and write a bit, so when we watch the TV I get her to write down the word she has just heard (in a book so she can refer to it later) explain to her why the spelling isn't correct then get her to repeat it untill she has the correct pronuciation

On the plus side, when I'm working around all of my english-speaking colleagues, it is always good to mix up the language when I don't want them to eavesdrop on what I'm saying.

I don't speak much Thai so likewise if I dont want people to eavesdrop we speak in Thai/English Ha-sib/50

[terdsak_12]

How can you have a relationship with someone you can't communicate with????

[warriors]

Just like the Thai Taxi drivers they have a conversation with a smile as they drive you long way around the block then take your money

[Darth Bangkok]

I always speak Thai with my girlfriend. I want her to start speaking English more but also don't want to wind up speaking pigeon english at home (as well as outside). Because of that, and because she is so afraid to speak English in front of me (she gets embarrassed), we've stuck to Thai except for a few words she throws out every now and then.

Last week she went to a job interview and said it was in English. I finally got her to repeat what she said in the interview. It was funny, but I didn't let her see me laugh. Its wierd how the sounds of someone's voice changes when they speak another language. HEr voice seemed to go up in pitch!

[daveh]

How can you have a relationship with someone you can't communicate with????

Who said there is no communication? It's just that I find it easier if we communicate with broken English rather than proper English.

[sua yai]

My ex - we were together for 8 years - spoke English as well as I've heard from a country girl who'd left school at 12 yrs old. For the first two years, we ran a bar together and , with the diversity of nationalities coming in, I was amazed to find that she was picking up German and Swedish very quickly as well. Some people just have a natural aptitude for languages, I suppose. As a result, my Thai, which was basic, didn't improve much.

The current g/f - 1 year - does not speak English as well as the ex, but she's keen to improve. So, my Thai is finally getting better, as is her English. At least we have a good laugh about it, particlarly my pathetic attempts to prounce "ng" in any word.

Just wish she'd stop watching these ###### Thai soaps. I've tried telling her it's better to watch English speaking programmes, but she tends not to understand me then!! lol.

[tuky]

Just an amusing comment.

When I first met my wife, we went out one night (as you do).

The next day she spoke about something that happened the night before, she said "last night two people go out and something happened" It took a while to realise that the two people she was referring to was us, I then explained to her that "we, meaning us two people, went out together last night" she understood and accepted this. A little while later we went out together again, only this time her sister came along, that made three people. So, the next morning she was talking about last night again and told me " Last night we went out threegether and had a good time" well I just couldn't stop laughing. What she said made total sense to her and to a degree I understood where it came from. What a mind she has to have worked that out, two people are together, three people are threegether

[penelope]

we talk in english.my wife is just as fluent as i am.although, i can kick her ass at scrabble

[Jeff1]

We speak a weird type of Thai / English . Now more English than Thai but we are in the U.S. at present . When we are in Thailand we ( try ) speak more Thai than English. Now im confused .

[IamMaiC]

I do the same with my wife jeff1 thai/english spoken at the same time in the beginning or our relationship i had to write english on a peice of paper and she answered the same then i sent her to english class she has gotten much better now

plus it helps her father speaks english also. he learned from the GI's that were stationed in udorn thani during the vietnam war he knows english slang words also

[Jeff1]

Thats great IamMaiC that her father can speak some English . My father in law still gets a kick out of shaking hands ! He will shake hands and everyone watching will laugh and he will tell everyone that he is wise in the ways of the farang . Good fun

[Coffee Dude]

I speak Thai really well... it's just that no one can understand me

My TGF could Spea englit litton bit when we first met but now....Incredible ability to learn a difficult language so quickly. I speak in complete sentences (even though she still doesn't always). She asks for syntax and verb conjugation corrections often. It took me 2 years to learn Spanish when engulfed in a 95% spanish enviro in Latin America. She has done better than I did with me being the only real (albiet poor) example and sounding board.

Coffee!!!

[PeaceBlondie]

I met my current boyfriend just as I was becoming an English teacher. At first I thought I just had to speak slowly and clearly, and repeat myself, using simple vocabulary and grammar. That works better in English-speaking countries where the immigrants are forced to start learning English, but in Thailand, English is a very foreign language.

Luckily, my boyfriend's English was high intermediate from the beginning, and it's much better now. My mate that teaches science at school is funny: proper British accent, but since he's married to a Thai lady, he'll speak to the Thai teachers of English in pidgin - "Yesterday I teach my class and they do good." A bit ridiculous (although most Thai teachers of English can't follow a complex sentence that's delivered in normal conversational rate and vocab level).

For the past tense, especially with verbs that are irregular, I try to use "-ing" phrases such as "Yesterday I was teaching my class, and they were doing very good." Or, "...very well." Even advanced speakers have trouble listening to "taught, did, were, bought, sold, went, came, thought, etc."

[Gazza]

I speak Thai really well... it's just that no one can understand me

That's funny that! Just like me. I'm bloody fluent (to me anyway) with what little I already know. And my pronunciation is &lt;deleted&gt;' perfect to a T.

But often people can't make head or tails of what I'm saying. But 'Johnny Sexpat' who'll make me howl with laughter at his feeble attempts with his badly, Italian accented mis-pronounced Thai, gets understood perfectly. What gives?

Maybe my wife is trying to tell me something when I ask about my Thai speaking skills, she'll make robotic arm movements while speaking Thai in a robotic voice.

But what the heck does she know?

[sbk]

Sua Yai, sounds like my husband is like your ex. He studied English in school (and actually learned it!) and then used it around his cousin's bungalow. When I met him I spoke zero Thai and so all our communication was in english. I made a point of speaking proper, clear english (if they don't hear it how can they learn it?) and now his English is fluent. He can read and write it (spelling's not terrific but then I can say that about alot of native english speakers too ), he has no problem watching movies or tv in english. A few years ago we were in the US visiting my family and he went into this restaurant in the hick town my sister was living in, to look for my sister. She wasn't in yet so he came back. According to my sister when she went in later one of the guys in the restaurant told her that a "guy who didn't speak very good english came in looking for you". She looked at him and said, "He speaks perfect english, probably better than you, he just has an accent!". He quickly apologized. It's amazing how many people can't hear past the accent. His is strong (especially when he is feeling lazy) but hey, who am I to criticize? His english is certainly miles better than my Thai, he has a better aptitude for languages than me, it comes easy for him, for me it's always a struggle.

So, the answer to the original question would be: English with some Thai mixed in (especially when we are around people who don't speak it and we want to talk about them ).

[ProThaiExpat]

While I have a very high level of verbal acuity, I still have a great deal of difficulty understanding words in English or any foreign language I have learned that are mis-pronounced.

Since communicating with my Thai is my primary objective, I will often mimic tinglish to make sure I am understood. While I can pronounce "house" easily and repetitively, my Thai still says "how". I end up saying "how" to mean house.

There is a certain amount of charm in Thais speaking English as they come up with some wonderful word combinations. "I understand 100%" is one of my favorites. An expression I now use.

Yes my Aussie son-in-law thinks I speak funny, but when he left a message on my answering machine in the States the first time, I thought "goodonya" was a Russian word. Lets not even get into English as spoken in England, or Scotland, or Ireland, or India.

If your better half wants to learn English or you want them to, send them off to English school and spend your time with them "communicating", in any way that makes you undestood. An occasional correction goes down well. I have found that "negative practice" works best. Thus when I say "Shut the lights", I am corrected, likewise with "vegentable".

[350torana]

I agree with the pidgeon-english thing. Have to say I do the same thing . Wifey went to university, but I sat in on one of her lessons and the Thai teacher was crap. Oh well, i am amazed at her ability to write and read english, just talking is a problem. I think my accent(Australian) is part of the problem. Although she is now fluent in swear words and can say " no worries". Also teaching her to say the proper time in English . A certain radio station (right at the end of the dial) said" 45 minutes past six" my wife quickly told me " she mean, quarter to seven, right? "