What Do You Think Of Guys Who Has Dated A Trans Girl?

[wolf5370]

assuming an instance of no condom or condom breakage...

pop corn's post is expressing an opinion based on facts- bi men sleep with men, gay men have higher instances of hiv, and if you are receptively gay or bi with a man you are engaging in the most riskiest sexual practice with regards to HIV.

But, popcorn, don't forget the bi men you would want to test have also had sex with girls, who have then had sex with straight men too. Although in a less risky way of course.

But we are not talking about a bi (or gay) man, we are talking about a transgendered woman. The assumption is that because she changed from male to female she had anal sex before that (the risky way?) - this is not a given. I still think users of prostitutes are more likely (using sex as the transmitter and conveniently ignoring drug users and blood/plasma doner recipients etc) to have AIDS - and as the use amongst young Thai men is prolific here, the danger of this spreading to the non-professional community is certainly a probablilty. As most farang males are most likely to find a non-virgin, there is always a risk that an earlier lover (even husband) could have been infected. As the hypothetical transgendered girl, Eve, has recently had a major operation, she will ave had an AIDS test anyway - and since that point her chances of contracting are exactly equal to anyother girl (or less if partners are more discerning - rightly or wrongly).

I think there is a tendancy to bring the ideas and statistics modelled on our own home countries and apply them to other countries, like Thailand. Given the difference in the use of prositutes in Thailand across the population, and the high incidence of AIDS anyway, I do not think that we can carry these assumptions. I am not aware of any good statistics here on, and I doubt I wold be too trusting of them if they were published, so I would be careful assuming that the gay 'sector' is riskier here than the straight 'sector'. It may well be the complete opposite!!!

[LadyHeather]

I thought I read somewhere that the type of HIV prevalent in Thailand is the kind more usually spread by heterosexual sex?

Regardless, it is a silly presumption to make in this case and really has nothing to do with dudeyone's original question. However, we haven't heard back from him for some time now so I would be interested in his response to what some people have said.

[OxfordWill]

I admit I have no up to date source for the stats (sort of) I cited. But, it actually doesnt affect my point, since whether it is gay or straight sectors which experience greater prevalence of HIV, bisexuals are dipping in both pools and, therefore, are risker partners as popcorn expressed.

[submaniac]

I found this article about soccer star Renaldo accidentally picking up transvestites, and thought it was interesting:

Guess Renaldo is gay too

Alot of transvestites are pretty convincing. Someone who has had the surgery and is on hormones is going to be even more so. So if all the bits and pieces are in the right spot, I don't think alot of men will inquire further...

[sbk]

A transvestite is not the same thing as a transsexual woman. Or even a man who wants to be a woman. A transvestite gets sexual kicks out of cross dressing. A transsexual is a person who believes they are the wrong gender.

transvestite:

a person and especially a male who adopts the dress and often the behavior typical of the opposite sex especially for purposes of emotional or sexual gratification

transsexual:

a person who strongly identifies with the opposite sex and may seek to live as a member of this sex especially by undergoing surgery and hormone therapy to obtain the necessary physical appearance (as by changing the external sex organs)

merriam-webster dictionary

[wolf5370]

A transvestite is not the same thing as a transsexual woman. Or even a man who wants to be a woman. A transvestite gets sexual kicks out of cross dressing. A transsexual is a person who believes they are the wrong gender.

transvestite:

a person and especially a male who adopts the dress and often the behavior typical of the opposite sex especially for purposes of emotional or sexual gratification

transsexual:

a person who strongly identifies with the opposite sex and may seek to live as a member of this sex especially by undergoing surgery and hormone therapy to obtain the necessary physical appearance (as by changing the external sex organs)

merriam-webster dictionary

Indeed. I know of a man (brother-in-law of a guy I used to work with) that wears women's clothing and even goes by a female (typically frilly old lady's) name - and he is still married to a women and had two kids. In all other ways he is a man. The kids hate it though, because hey cop the grief at school etc. They still call him Dad, not Mum Mark II.

[geriatrickid]

Tell the woman. In this specific case, it would be the kind thing to do.

[Nip]

My apologies, that's what I meant. A girl trapped in a boy's body.

With respect not long ago somebody posted thus; "You can take a spider and remove all his legs but he is still a spider." Which is a fair point. On the other hand

Lemmy from Moterhead when asked would he lash a post operative person he replied " If a guy is brave enough to cut his dick off. I guess I'm brave enough to shag him!"

[patklang]

Regardless of whether or not they used to be men, they still LOOK like women and consider themselves to be women.

i disagree.

if someone dresses up like jesus and considers themselves to be jesus, it doesnt make them jesus.

no real christian will follow the teachings of a fake jesus.

just like no real straight man will be attracted to a fake woman.

Feel free to disagree, you have the right to your opinion but I have known more than a few straight men who unwittingly found a transgendered woman very attractive.

Perhaps this means they are secretly gay in your eyes? No idea, but I disagree with you

I assume you mean when the post-op is attraxctive,but there are many mnay who are katoy kwai,and i would be horrified even more if a guy went with one of them,unless he is bi

[Suaymai]

Well most transgendered prob be horrified to be sought after as such, from my understanding they want to be looked at as a man or woman - conform to the new gender.

I agree.

As a transsexual myself i want my partner to love me for who i am and not what i am..

[MrHammer]

assuming an instance of no condom or condom breakage...

pop corn's post is expressing an opinion based on facts- bi men sleep with men, gay men have higher instances of hiv, and if you are receptively gay or bi with a man you are engaging in the most riskiest sexual practice with regards to HIV.

But, popcorn, don't forget the bi men you would want to test have also had sex with girls, who have then had sex with straight men too. Although in a less risky way of course.

But we are not talking about a bi (or gay) man, we are talking about a transgendered woman. The assumption is that because she changed from male to female she had anal sex before that (the risky way?) - this is not a given. I still think users of prostitutes are more likely (using sex as the transmitter and conveniently ignoring drug users and blood/plasma doner recipients etc) to have AIDS - and as the use amongst young Thai men is prolific here, the danger of this spreading to the non-professional community is certainly a probablilty. As most farang males are most likely to find a non-virgin, there is always a risk that an earlier lover (even husband) could have been infected. As the hypothetical transgendered girl, Eve, has recently had a major operation, she will ave had an AIDS test anyway - and since that point her chances of contracting are exactly equal to anyother girl (or less if partners are more discerning - rightly or wrongly).

I think there is a tendancy to bring the ideas and statistics modelled on our own home countries and apply them to other countries, like Thailand. Given the difference in the use of prositutes in Thailand across the population, and the high incidence of AIDS anyway, I do not think that we can carry these assumptions. I am not aware of any good statistics here on, and I doubt I wold be too trusting of them if they were published, so I would be careful assuming that the gay 'sector' is riskier here than the straight 'sector'. It may well be the complete opposite!!!

Its almost impossible for a man to get HIV from vaginal sex.

On the other hand a transgender woman has an artificial vagina. I would guess the risk is about the same as anal sex.

In the US today, there is just about no new cases of HIV among straight men. New infections are among drug addicts and gays.

[MrHammer]

Well most transgendered prob be horrified to be sought after as such, from my understanding they want to be looked at as a man or woman - conform to the new gender.

I agree.

As a transsexual myself i want my partner to love me for who i am and not what i am..

So when and how do you tell him? I think most men would feel deceived if you they found out on their own right?

[LaLa]

In the US today, there is just about no new cases of HIV among straight men. New infections are among drug addicts and gays.

are you sure about that, do you have any fact to show? cuse i think you are not right

Edited March 11, 2009 by LaLa

[cognos]

I don't know if anyone here is familiar with "Tula", the transgendered James Bond Girl (For Your Eyes Only)

A bit of information on her is here:

http://www.universalexports.net/00Tula.shtml

I think alot of this talk is a bit silly. If all the surgical procedures were done such that the former man is physically identical to a woman, why would anyone think he is gay or has other 'issues'. A beautiful female form is a beautiful female form. I would not ban Tula from my bedroom, and I do not think that makes me gay. I also do not think any actual gay man would be very interested in her.

As for telling a girl you are with about your past transexual GF, I would treat it as the same rule as I have for all my ex's-->just don't talk about it. Transgendered female or fully biological female...talking about your ex's is not a good thing. No one wants to hear either about how much you can't stand your ex or how much you miss your ex. Either way it's gonna cause problems in your relationships. Either she thinks you are an a*hole for not being able to end a relationship on good terms, or she's gonna think you still have a thing for your Ex.

An Ex is an Ex is an Ex. If you and your current love are in a long standing relationship...then you talk about it...if she asks. You don't do it in the beginning. Frankly whoever you were with in the past is not really your current girl's business because it happened before you met her.

The pic is clearly a man for me! No woman has that kind of legs, they are male legs! I wouldn't touch male legs!

ha Ha,I had a good laugh when I read your posts.Less is more,and you don't talk(Sitting)Bull.Those that like ladyboys,transgendered,transexual.. probably have gay tendencies,not that there's anything wrong with that.

[endure]

ha Ha,I had a good laugh when I read your posts.Less is more,and you don't talk(Sitting)Bull.Those that like ladyboys,transgendered,transexual.. probably have gay tendencies,not that there's anything wrong with that.

No they don't. If they had 'gay tendencies they'd be attracted to the one on the right. If they have 'straight tendencies' the one on the left would fit the bill. Why is is that a large proportion of straight men seem unable to get their heads round the concept that gay men are attracted to other men - not women or even men dressed up as women?

[sbk]

ha Ha,I had a good laugh when I read your posts.Less is more,and you don't talk(Sitting)Bull.Those that like ladyboys,transgendered,transexual.. probably have gay tendencies,not that there's anything wrong with that.

No they don't. If they had 'gay tendencies they'd be attracted to the one on the right. If they have 'straight tendencies' the one on the left would fit the bill. Why is is that a large proportion of straight men seem unable to get their heads round the concept that gay men are attracted to other men - not women or even men dressed up as women?

That is a very good question and one whose answer I think most men would find hard to accept.

I don't know about other women but for me, I don't look at a transgendered woman and see a man, I see someone who has always felt like a woman and is now a woman. There is a hairdresser in town who has been a woman for quite a few years now (at least 15 I'd think) and I consider her a woman. She is not gay, she is not attracted to other women, she is a woman attracted to men. I have several gay friends and they are not attracted to her, they are attracted to men.

Why this continues to be such an issue with some men is only something that they can answer for themselves but I think they really should be taking a good hard look at their own prejudices and preconceived notions first.

As for the concept that hetero men don't get HIV/AIDS well MrHammer, you dont' have a clue what you are talking about. Might I suggest you do some research first before making such ignorant and dangerous blanket statements?

[hlfourie]

I can't understand why men would want to have sex with anything but a real women, not a half women or an operationaly changed women, a real women. Anything less, I loose all interest and so does my friend down below....There are enough women to F...and enough women who want to be F.....so why waste your time on anything thats not real.

[TexasRanger]

Dress it up any way you like, a man who has sex with another man dressed as a woman it gay or bisexual. Stop fannying around the issue, why is it only thailand that thinks it is a grey area or a 3rd sex. They are men dressed as women.

[mc2]

Regardless of whether or not they used to be men, they still LOOK like women and consider themselves to be women.

i disagree.

if someone dresses up like jesus and considers themselves to be jesus, it doesnt make them jesus.

weak analogy.

weak response - you should at least say why.

[hlfourie]

Regardless of whether or not they used to be men, they still LOOK like women and consider themselves to be women.

i disagree.

if someone dresses up like jesus and considers themselves to be jesus, it doesnt make them jesus.

weak analogy.

weak response - you should at least say why.

Why what, is there something wrong with you WHY don't you undrstand what is a man and what is a women, not a fake women a real women, it is more that just the physical features, a women does and think differantly to a man

[mc2]

Why what, is there something wrong with you WHY don't you undrstand what is a man and what is a women, not a fake women a real women, it is more that just the physical features, a women does and think differantly to a man

you are barking up the wrong tree, son.

here's a biscuit, off you go.

[sbk]

I don't see any reason to continue this thread anymore, given the current state of posts.

[Sheryl]

Its almost impossible for a man to get HIV from vaginal sex.

On the other hand a transgender woman has an artificial vagina. I would guess the risk is about the same as anal sex.

In the US today, there is just about no new cases of HIV among straight men. New infections are among drug addicts and gays.

Addendum in the intersts of public health:

The above is incorrect. It is completely possible to get HIV from vaginal sex and the vast majority of people with HIV in the world did so.

In the US and western Europe, most HIV infections have always been among gays and IV drug users. This is because it so happened that the virus first entered there in the gay community and there is not a great deal of cross-infection between that segment of the population and heterosexuals. In Africa (where the epidemic began) it has always been a primarily heterosexual disease. In Asia it flourishes in both the gay and straight populations but majority of cases are straight.

Nothing to do with strains of the virus, just behavioral factors and happenstance in terms of the social networks within which the virus first got a foothold.

It is true that the risk of transmission from a single encounter is hiogher for anal sex than vaginal, but plenty of men -- including western men -- contact it from vaginal sex here in LOS.