Farang girls in thailand with partners?

[sbk]

<font color='#000000'>just curious girls, how many of us (admittedly few) have thai partners, farang partners etc. lots of single guys posting here looking for "friends" . just curious how much chance they've got!

I can answer now, I have a thai husband, been here for 15 years next january.</font>

[Nat]

oops! mine was a null vote! oh well, think most people know my situation  

[Amyji]

....and I'd also love to know how you met your Thai partner. I'm currently in the dating pool and would love to meet a NICE man, Thai or other nationality. Yet, I've heard that if a Thai man is brave enough to approach you, then he has enough confidence to likely be a womanizer, as most Thai men have the reputation of being anyway.

Also, how does your Thai man view the monogamy issue? Did you have to readjust your values and expectations in this regard, especially if you are in a long term relationship/marriage with him? If I become involved with a Thai man, should I just lower my expectations that he will be faithful to me?

Amyji

[sbk]

mmm.... womanizing is a problem with many thai men but i think it depends on where you meet them (bar boys are notorious), their class/education level/wealth level, how committed they are, and how often you are around. I know alot of guys (albeit bar boys) who will get another girlfriend as soon as the last one goes home. they are monogamous while she's around, but when the cat is away the mice will play.

My husband is very monogamous (he, very sweetly I might add, says why should he look around when he's already got everything he wants) but then so is his father. His parents do not condone mia nois, promiscuity etc.

as for lowering your expectations , not at all, why should you? Most younger thai women don't put up with it anymore either, even in the sticks, which is where I am at.

as to where to meet a nice one, well, stay away from the beach resorts/bars etc. try meeting one in a non-touristy area, they are usually much more normal. and I might add, a large percentage of my husband's numerous cousins, second cousins etc are also monogamous. its not every guy, just depends on the guy.

[Boo]

Gotta agree with sbk on this too. Would you lower your standards to be with a guy in your own country? I hope not! Most Thai men are the same as every other nationality but unfortunatly the ones exposed to the tourist industry for a while tend to be more westernised & also see & take the opportunity to be butterflys (& why not IF they are single) unfortunatly a lot of them aren't so it is up to your judgement when you meet a guy & use your common sense.

My husband & his family are fairly conservative & his parents had a happy loving relationship for more than 30 years until his father died so I suppose I could be what they learn at home but also, remember, that many Thais still beleive that the men should sow their wild oats while they are young, so it's possibly a social thing too ???

I wouldn't bother trying to think about it too much though as the whole issue of men in general could drive you mad! Instead use your common sense & make your feelings clear in the beginning, at least if they do wrong they will know why they woke up with their dangly bits in a pickling jar next to the bed!

[Nat]

I wouldn't bother trying to think about it too much though as the whole issue of men in general could drive you mad!

Couldn't agree more  

There are good and bad all around the world - just keep an open mind. Like the girls said if you wouldn't put up with it back home, no reason to here.

Boo - "dangly bits in a pickling jar"  ???    hear it's a delicacy in some countries  

[Amyji]

You're certainly right, ladies. I wouldn't want to lower my expectations with a Thai man or any man for that matter. It's just so depressing when all I hear about Thai men is that they all have many girlfriends and are rarely monogamous.

Then how to meet a nice guy? Certainly not at a bar. Well, what are my options then? Being able to meet a least half way on the language bridge is also important. I dated a man (who I found out later had a GF living at his place the entire time!!!) who hardly spoke a word of English and it was terribly difficult getting to know him. We had some quiet dates.  

[Nat]

Hi Amyji

Sorry to hear about the guy you dated - men can disappoint at times   . I know it's easy to lose faith, but there are decent guys out there - unfortunately I'm not qualified to advised where, as my track record hasn't been the best.

I wouldn't say it's impossible to meet a nice guy at a bar (some of them drink   ) - I think it's a matter of getting to know them (which can be hard with the language barrier) and being cautious. It's best to give someone the benefit of doubt - they may surprise you   . I know sometimes it can be hard to trust someone, esp after an experience like yours, but if you meet someone you like it might be worth the risk. I heard someone once say "sometimes you have to put your dick on the chopping board" (even though we're woman I'm sure we understand the meaning) - it may pay off, if it doesn't all wounds heal it time.....right?  ???  

[sbk]

through friends, either local farangs or local thais.  find out if any of your thai female friends have cousins etc they would recommend. I know lots and lots of monogamous thai guys but let's face it, they are already taken! the thai women are smart enough to grab a good thing quick! I met my husband because he was the cousin of the owner of the bungalow i stayed at (the cousin's wife at the time an Aussie) and his cousins wife vouched for him. turned out to be true too, i got me a rare, terrific guy. so, poll your friends, acquaintances etc. some cute guys work at the banks too! good luck!

[Nat]

Good advice sbk  

In regards to those banking cuties, just make sure they don't work on the trading floors as they may end up playing you the way they play the market    

[JemJem]

Firstly, dear 'amyji'....I like your phrase 'dating pool'

I would recommend you (and other 'seekers') to seek your 'special guy' through the Internet, particularly the personal ads. And, make sure you are sincere and open from the beginning. However be patient and spend quite a long time corresponding, and then when/if there is a willingness from both sides to meet up, then surely meet up and see how it goes.

For sure, dating through the Internet has its disadvantages but I think this way there is more chance of finding 'Mr. Right', someone who will fit your expectations...also it adds spice to the whole thing....I mean, corresponding for a while and then meeting the person, even if you know how he looks like through a pic he sent, can be real exciting !

Anyway, ladies, as a bisexual-turned-gay guy, I can tell you that at least you, as a girl, have a significantly more decent chance of meeting your special one than a gay guy. Surely, what I mean is a special relationship.....not a one night stand. As a gay guy, in Thailand, there were numerous opportunities for me to have one night stands but since I am not a one-night-stand person and since I was seeking a long tertm relationship, I had never done that.

Thus I found it difficult and even the dates through the Internet were a disaster for me. Unfortunately I realised that there mustn't be that many gay guys seeking a long term thing over there (I normally dislike generalisations but that was what I noticed the time I was there in Thailand).

Good luck and regards.

Jem

[Kathe2]

Jem....

Visiting in a nice Gallery or places where so many thais..who has educated, or visiting thai chat room mostly international thai chat room, you shall meet many nice thai guys who can speak good english and good education too.

Thai guys are helpful and smart, ( I am a thai woman...hehee)

Good chance too..if you have thai friends and thai friends invites you to the party , and maybe introduce you to a nice ppl there too.

Good Luck Jem !

Kathe

[JemJem]

Thanks for your suggestions and thoughts Kathe but I don't live in Thailand anymore and if I ever go back there again, it will probably only be for a holiday.

Anyway, generally speaking I have had a positive time while living in Thailand.

Anyway, enough about me I don't want to 'hi-jack the thread'.....after all, it is about farang women's stuff !

Regards,

Jem

[Nat]

I don't want to 'hi-jack the thread'.....after all, it is about farang women's stuff !

Hi Jem

Your input is great - besides we're all attracted to the same things

[Supersurch]

Hi,

Newbie here. This particular topic intrigued me and I wanted to ask you ladies a question.

Never realized that this many English-speaking women have relationships with Thai men in Thailand or are interested in Thai men at all. I have always dated American women here in the states, but because they are the majority. And the relationships I've had were not based on racial differences, but rather common interests. Not a lot of Thai women where I'm from. Sorry, I digressed. Any way, from a biological and cultural stand point, what is it about Thai men that may interest you into having a relationship with them? Or is it because Thai men are the majority and white guys are hard to find?

The reason I ask is because I wanted to see if there are differences in the women's taste compared to the men that talk about Thai women. It seems like majority of the men here enjoy the physical attributes more so than anything else.

I will be on my way to Thailand soon. I am Thai, but an American citizen. I have been living in the states for quite some time now, pretty much my whole life. I thought this would be a good time to take a few years off of work to visit my homeland and to find lost relatives. I will pretty much be a foreigner in my own country, which will be odd, but hoping to network with English-speaking people. Visited the other topics on this site, but most are bar-hounds swapping stories about how they will contribute to spreading diseases and contracting them. Not interested. Found that the women on this board are more interested than the men in sharing information about living in Thailand than talking about whether it's better to go short time or long time? But this topic caught my eye. Any way, I digressed again, but was just curious in regards to English-speaking women finding interest in Thai men in Thailand. Thanks.

[elfe]

hello Supersurch, welcome to the forum!

well, I guess why so many foreign women who actually live here are in a relationship with thai men has many reasons. Many of us decided to stay here because they had already a thai boyfriend and wanted to continue this realtionship.

Others stay here for some time and get to know more and more thai people and the culture and fall in love.

Like me, I already lived here for 2 years before I met my Thai boyfriend and he was the first Thai man for me. Unfortunately I found it not easy to find an attractive and single farang man here who is not a tourist ( I don't like 'short-time') and is decent enough to start a relationship with. Most guys here who are not already in a relationship are too much interested in the nightlife and bargirl scene as to start a serious relationship other than just friendship with them.

For me the main criteria are not cultural background or colour of skin but the caracter, common interests, etc. And if you are living here, why not with a local person, it makes living here much more interesting and is also helpful in many ways and gives you a better insight in the country's culture.

but sure many girls fall for the look of some thai men and the exotic spice...

I wish you a very nice time here in your homeland and interesting encounters with your family here. I met already many Thais who had been brought up abroad and came for the first time to visit Thailand. It is always funny how Thai people are puzzled when a Thai does not act like a Thai but completely westernized

You will have interesting experiences and will be very welcome!

chokdee kah

elfe

[sbk]

Hello supersurch, perfect place to post the question I think!

I came to thailand as a tourist, was teaching english in taiwan, with no intent on finding a "thai boyfriend", it just happened. Mind you, it helps that his cousin had an Aussie wife at the time who vouched for him (I've always been amazed at how many girls hook up with some guy when they don't speak the language, don't understand the culture and then take everything he says at face value.) frankly, if it hadn't been for my Aussie friend I wouldn't have been interested. They can tell you anything, and often do, and how would you know what was true? Its hard enough having relationships with people from the same culture. So, I guess what attracted me to my now husband of 14 years (!) was his kindness, gentleness, honesty (yes, honesty, except for his dad, he's the most honest person i know) and his looks last. Of course, looks always count, but to be honest, if you had asked me the type of guy I found attractive (and had always dated) I would have said, blond hair, blue eyes. So, in sum, I was attracted to my husband by his character traits and by his obvious love for me. It was his willingness to commit that blew me away. And that is the reason we live here rather than the US, we lived there for a while but felt that as a young couple starting out, thailand would be easier. well, it has and it hasn't. as it would be anywhere, frankly.

As to how you will feel once you come back, I think you will find it difficult at first because you will be viewed as being "thai" and will be expected to behave as such. we farang are often given alot of leeway in our behavior because we are obviously farang and they believe we don't know any better. But you, as a Thai person (regardless of where you have lived) will be expected to know the rules! Just give it some time and I am sure after a while you will find your niche, good luck to you and hope to have your input again in the future, would love to hear how things go.

[Nat]

Hi Supersurch

Agree with sbk that this is the perfect place to post your question

Personally I don't tend to focus too much on the physical attributes - however have seen quite a few thai stunners but then I think all men are attractive in their own way. I was attracted to my ex simply because he made me laugh. That may sound odd, but his humour and manners were what first drew my attention. The cultural differences made it more interesting as it was all new to me. Everyone's attracted to different things, but for me it comes down to personality.

Hope you have a wonderful time in thailand

[mrentoul]

For me the main criteria are not cultural background or colour of skin

Don't discount skin colour - delicious!

[Supersurch]

[Supersurch]

[Edward B]

For me the main criteria are not cultural background or colour of skin

Don't discount skin colour - delicious!

Yeah, I like the pink bits too Mike.

[sbk]

skywise, what makes you think all thai men have small weenies? seen many yourself?

[Nat]

sbk - it must help him sleep at night thinking that

[dr_Pat_Pong]

Hmmmmmmmmmmm skydumb....what rhymes with banker ?

[Nat]

what rhymes with banker ?

hee...hee.... and often

[Supersurch]

LoL . I was wondering why it took so long for the neanderthals to make a comment on this.

Genetically, Mongoloids are known to be smaller physically than the Caucasians and Negroids. This has been known ever since the evolution of Man. And yet, still today the subject of penis size comes up as a show of power and self-absorbtion. But one does not realize that speaking and thinking of one's penis or anybody elses for that matter is a lack of one's identity and a subconscious guilt of wanting to touch another man's penis.

"I have a bigger penis than you, then I must be wonderful, love me, love me!"

You think the length and size of a man's penis has something to do with these statistics?:

Estimated numbers of diagnoses of AIDS through December 2002, by race or ethnicity:

Race or Ethnicity # of Cumulative AIDS Cases

White, not Hispanic 364,458

Black, not Hispanic 347,491

Hispanic 163,940

Asian/Pacific Islander 6,924

American Indian/Alaska Native 2,875

Unknown or multiple race 887

National Center for HIV, STD and TB Prevention

Divisions of HIV/AIDS Prevention

[Boo]

QUOTE (Supersurch @ Tue 2003-11-11, 21:09:01)

...but was just curious in regards to English-speaking women finding interest in Thai men in Thailand. Thanks. 

They have a fetish for small weenies... 

whats the matter skypr*&k, feeling insecure? can't handle the fact that these well endowed thai men are stealing all the western women Get yourself down to the nearest ladybar, I'm sure one of the smaller made thai ladies will show appriciation for you

[Skywise]

The majority of Thai guys believe that farang women have big cavernous pus*ys...Which is mostly true if you compare them with their Thai counterparts.

[Skywise]

..can't handle the fact that these well endowed thai men are stealing all the western women...

I like you, your funny!

Yeah, I'm extremely threatened!

Gee, I guess I struck a nerve...all the farang women are crawling outta the shadows!