ETC Posted March 24, 2011 Posted March 24, 2011 What do you call a farmer with a sheep under each arm? A playboy
ETC Posted March 24, 2011 Posted March 24, 2011 (edited) Read this one sometime ago, but couldn't help wondering how much more complicated it might be if he were married to a Thai lady that spoke very little english...5555555555555 A farmer walked into an attorney's office wanting to file for a divorce. The attorney asked, "May I help you?" The farmer said, "Yea, I want to get one of those dayvorce's." The attorney said, "well do you have any grounds?" The farmer said, "Yea, I got about 140 acres." The attorney said, " No, you don't understand, do you have a case?" The farmer said, "No, I don't have a Case, but I have a John Deere." The attorney said, "No you don't understand, I mean do you have a grudge?" The farmer said, "Yea I got a grudge, that's where I park my John Deere." The attorney said, "No sir, I mean do you have a suit?" The farmer said, "Yes sir, I got a suit. I wear it to church on Sundays." The exasperated attorney said, "Well sir, does your wife beat you up or anything?" The farmer said, "No sir, we both get up about 4:30." Finally, the attorney says, "Okay, let me put it this way. "WHY DO YOU WANT A DIVORCE?" And the farmer says, "Well, I can never have a meaningful conversation with her." Edited March 24, 2011 by ETC
IsaanAussie Posted October 6, 2012 Author Posted October 6, 2012 What a freaking idiot!! - Someone needs to burn a bit more of that 'Midnight Oil' and learn a few things. If this wasn’t so serious it would be funny!! THIS IS JUST ONE OF THE MORONS IN OUR GOVERNMENT - Peter Garrett (ex-lead singer of Midnight Oil, now a Minister in the Labour Government of Australia) PETER GARRETT IS DEFINITELY A COUPLE OF CANS SHORT OF A SLAB! The Australian Government and the NSW Forestry Service were presenting an alternative to NSW sheep farmers for controlling the dingo population. It seems that after years of the sheep farmers using the tried and true methods of shooting and/or trapping the predators, the Labour Government (Peter Garrett - Environmental Minister), the NSW Forestry Service and the Greens tree-huggers had a 'more humane' solution. What they proposed was for the animals to be captured alive, the males would then be castrated, - and let loose again. Therefore the dingo population would be controlled. This was ACTUALLY proposed to the NSW Sheep Farmers Association. All of the sheep farmers thought about this amazing idea for a couple of minutes. Finally, one of the old boys in the back of the conference room stood up, tipped his hat back and said, “Mr Garrett, son, I don't think you understand our problem,- - those dingo's ain't f*****g our sheep, - they're eatin' 'em.” You should have been there to hear the roar of laughter as Mr Peter Garrett and the members of the NSW Forestry Service, the Greens and the other "tree huggers" left the meeting very "sheepishly". Jeeez! Someone save us from these idiots..... 1
Lickey Posted October 8, 2012 Posted October 8, 2012 Goverment oficials are a bit mindless as to what a farmers needs are, they make some weird rules without really looking into the subject, hence i gave up trying to make a living [joke] out of farming, but the bad luck continues, Last weekend my pet mouse Elvis died, he was "Caught in a Trap" And if that wasnt bad enough, the hospital called today, saying my father had died, then my brother called, His father died as well, and then Sister called, Her father died as well, so all this bad news in 2 days has left me a bit shaken, but not stirred,
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