Legal Rights After Divorce

[drum]

your a English guy who marry's a Thai girl legal wedding ,you buy a home, take out a mortgage in her name,the mortgage is in his and her joint bank account,but only funded buy the husband, you divorce,what is the legal right for the man to claim is financial input in the home,

[noise]

You will get a variety of opinions, most saying the expat will lose it all if the wife does not agree to the property settlement.

But Thailand has community property laws and there are many cases where the court has either required a split of the property between the two or awarded the property to the man because he can prove he provided 100% of the funds to buy it.

You will need a lawyer. Talk to a few first and, then, decide if you want to spend the money and take the time to go through the courts. It will not be quick process if it is contested (and I am talking about at least a year if she has a decent attorney). And do you want to go through the mental aggravation?

If you do decide to persue it, I recommend reviewing the complaint and agreeing with the wording before it is filed. Have everything written in Thai translated into English for your review before submitting it to the courts. And start off day one with the translator that would appear in court with you so that, if his/her English isn't that great, your lawyer's interpretation of what you tell him isn't skewed.

[Mario2008]

When you divorce you split up all the assets (that includes all the debts) acquired during the marriage. What either of you had before the marriage is left out of it.

If you divorce at the amphur under mutual consent, you can enter any agreement you make regarding the division of assets.

That goes also for the house, and even for land. Noise is right, Thai courts do grant rights to the foreign husbands. Even if you sign a document at the land office that the land is your wife's only.

Try to get to an arrangement with your wife, as that would make it possible to divorce at the amphur and use a lawyer to put the agreement on paper.

[XXpate48USA]

When you divorce you split up all the assets (that includes all the debts) acquired during the marriage. What either of you had before the marriage is left out of it.

If you divorce at the amphur under mutual consent, you can enter any agreement you make regarding the division of assets.

That goes also for the house, and even for land. Noise is right, Thai courts do grant rights to the foreign husbands. Even if you sign a document at the land office that the land is your wife's only.

Try to get to an arrangement with your wife, as that would make it possible to divorce at the amphur and use a lawyer to put the agreement on paper.

Hello marioo

you seem to be informed as to a thai divorce. I am trying to figure out what my rights are etc. I was married at a local amphur and is "legal" for sure. Now, my question is....If I decide not to take the chance of returning to thailand for an amicable divorce because I have no intentions of getting married again. I married a little too fast and we only lived together for 6 months in Chiang mai. I have been threatened by her and her conversations seems to always turn to money money money. She has a very quick temper and she keeps wanting more money no matter how much I send her. I left Thailand 6 months ago and now she is angry I haven't returned etc., Our conversations on the phone (every day) most times are short and then when money is mentioned she starts this "i don't give her enough etc) I usually send about 15000baht and she stays with her parents in a small village in central Thailand. I was talked into paying for new air conditioners etc and after being with her for the first two months she said she had a truck payment. This truck is not used by her nor me and is used by her brothers and for thier use. She also had told me she did not have any chldren before the marriage but after the amphur visit and legal marriage I confronted her as to who this 16 year old was., She lied and said it was her brothers etc. I said. it is yours, right? and she finally copped out that it was hers and then I had been asked by her brother for a loan which I did. He asked her to ask me and said 7 days he would pay me back etc. That was 9 months ago. I have never seen a satang nor heard of a re-ppayment plan of any sorts but she says he feels bad and will pay it back in about 5 years.......Ok, I understand I think she was the one who said he would pay it back etc. Who knows what the truth is. I would have rather just given it to him to help hhim rather than a lie to get it.

Anyway, things of course are about money etc. Not a normal as we(dalang) think of marriage. I was told by her at first she would live with me anywhere in Thailand and now her story is she will only stay with her parents house (which will be hers later) and wants to fix that home up before we have our own home and of course needs my income to pay for all the remodeling etc and pay for the electric bills from the air conditioners I paid for to help her parents. I also was asked many times for loans from her brothers. I have a decent income and retired young so I am able to live confortable in Thailand and the USA. It is not a big pension but plenty to pay for both and have a little extra. The home in the usa I had planned on eventually selling it after I knew things were going to be good in Thailand with her, but it does not look as though it will work out that way. It is about money and support rather than a happy equal give and take marriage.

Now, I have been threatened when she has her temper tamtrums and uses some pretty vulgar language etc and has even said " I die soon". Ok, it''s not hard to figure out that I don't want to take the chance of going back to end up thrown off a balcony or some accidental thing that she would end up with my inheritance(USA home, assets) I don't think she would really stoop to that sort of thing but "Money" is humber one with her and she needs to find a way to start taking care of this dauighter that is living with a grandmother(fathers mother). She now wants me to live close to the daughter(that she never had) now that has come to light she has one.

I have bent over backwards to try and do my best to help her family considering I also have a home and bills in the usa to pay along with some expensive meds I take. for a slight heart condition. I am only in my late 50's but I feel better living closer to a good hospital but that does not seem important to her. Only making the home nicer where her parents live. I think you can get the point of how happy this marriage would turn out. She is very spoiled and I think she had this idea "all falang are rich" syndrome. That is why she met me on a IM website and we talked for a long time before I came to meet her.

Everything was a lie and I fell for it . She still can not be honest about anything etc. She is angry with me because I am not back to Bkk yet. I would have been back many months ago if I hadn't stumbled upon the dozens of lies. Even as far as asking her where she is staying she can not tell the truth. My feelings are that you can't have a marriage if you can't trust anything you are told.

So, my question to anybody is: If I just don't rerturn to Thailand, what can she do as far as getting support from me since we never bought anything to together in thailand otherthan yellow fold and gifts for her and her family and all my assets, home and pension are from the usa and I had before we met. I am afraid to return because of the many storys I hear and read about falang's and thai familys "taking care" of the falang husband for the inheritance. I'm sure you can understand my fears on this considering the more than once angry statement "I die soon". Also her use of F__you has been said many times to me. I believe she has had other falang relationships that have not worked out or has worked in another proffession at some point in her life. She is 43 and very pretty and very spoiled. .,...Anyway, obvilously this marriage would end up with me broke and maybe even worse in the long run since we are 16 years apart in age and with money being the central point of her talks and that she wants it all her way rather than comprimise livning a couple hours drive from her familys homes. This town has very few falang and no one there speaks english etc.

Now my question is: rather than returning and hiring and attorney for 30-5000baht or taking the chance of trying to get her to go to the anphur to do an amicable divorce. If I just called it quits and never went back to Thailand, can she get any portion of my pension etc. I know she can not get my home or other assets I had before marriage. I just don't want to end up a statistic after the threats she has said. I think the one brother is using her to try and get as much from me as possible while she can. I am about at my wits end trying to decide what to do! Does anyone have any advice for my options without ever having to go back to a final court hearing for a court divorce? Can I just say goodbye and leave it to her to get what she needs done as far as gettting a divorce from me without having to worry about losing half or a portion of my pension?

I basically was tricked and never would have married if I had known the truth about her having a daughter and family to support on top of that and now won't live in a town that is more comfortable for me. I would have married her happily if there has been no lies, even with the daughter. But she just can never tell the truth and is never satified with any amount of money I have sent to help her(every month) out of the goodness of my heart because I understand being poor and broke but it is puting a strain on my finances doing this every month, and knowing that I don't want a wife that can not tell me the truth ever......sooo, if I just stay put in USA and say goodbye. I know I am still legally married and recognized in the usa too and am not worried if I died if she got it. I lost my wife to cancer a few years ago and no other family to leave anything to.

I told her that I liked my privacy etc and wanted to either live in Chiang mai or Bkk and get a condo or nice home there and of course send about 5kbaht each month to help her parents. But this she will not do(she says) I have lost my interest in retiring in Thailand with this experience(I think) I'm not sure but may return one day. I think I just got hooked up a little too fast, but this lady is very good at making you beieve her(at first). She does have some good qualitys at times as long as her money needs are met. This is not my idea of a happy understanding/best friend/love marriage........any input will be apreciated....thanks...

[drum]

all Thai women are liars they will do almost anything to better there lives and family financially,from what I can make out if you do not live with your Thai wife or g/f or set hard and sure rules before you get together your a hiding to nothing, sorry i cant help you with information,but i would try and divorce with out returning to thai,and stop sending money,

[Mossfinn]

Firstly regarding protecting your assets in the USA, read the first line of Marios post, although it might be different if she makes it to the USA.

Secondly, I would treat Drums post with a little .................

[craigt3365]

One post with derogatory remarks towards Thais has been removed from view.

[Mario2008]

If you don't divorce her, you continue to build up assets that have to be split with her, including any debts she or you might make. That might not be the wisest thing to do!

Also as you pointed out she would continue to be a heir to your estate.

She could, after 1 believe 3 years, divorce you based on abandonment.

[drum]

One post with derogatory remarks towards Thais has been removed from view.

oops do apologise

[noise]

Hello marioo

you seem to be informed as to a thai divorce. I am trying to figure out what my rights are etc. I was married at a local amphur and is "legal" for sure. Now, my question is............any input will be apreciated....thanks...

Since you said "any input".......

If you want to have the reassurance of complying with any potential legal requirement, I have to ask if you have checked with a U.S. attorney to see how you might annul the marriage for, say abandonment (refusing to return and live with you in the US) or divorce for a similar reason. You might need a lawyer with some experience with US/Thai legal "relations".

And while I have never been through a divorce, I seem to remember hearing there is a way of legally stating a "separation" has taken place and, even though not yet divorced, you are no longer responsible for any debts incurred, etc., etc. I am sure you will have no problem protecting your pensions and properties.

You might google all that first. There is probably a wealth of info out there that would prepare you to spend minimum time in a lawyer's office at whatever his hourly rate is.

[XXpate48USA]

Hello marioo

you seem to be informed as to a thai divorce. I am trying to figure out what my rights are etc. I was married at a local amphur and is "legal" for sure. Now, my question is............any input will be apreciated....thanks...

Since you said "any input".......

If you want to have the reassurance of complying with any potential legal requirement, I have to ask if you have checked with a U.S. attorney to see how you might annul the marriage for, say abandonment (refusing to return and live with you in the US) or divorce for a similar reason. You might need a lawyer with some experience with US/Thai legal "relations".

And while I have never been through a divorce, I seem to remember hearing there is a way of legally stating a "separation" has taken place and, even though not yet divorced, you are no longer responsible for any debts incurred, etc., etc. I am sure you will have no problem protecting your pensions and properties.

You might google all that first. There is probably a wealth of info out there that would prepare you to spend minimum time in a lawyer's office at whatever his hourly rate is.

Thanks you, noise

Yes, I have called and checked and searched many and most of the US lawyers have said the best thing to do wouild be to get a Thailand lawyer, as one in the US would just mostly be a :go between" I contacted siamlegal and they quoted me 30,000 and they can do the preliminarys etc. but I would have to be back in Thailand for the final resolutution court hearing.

I am trying to figure a way of just not returning since I just don't feel safe requarding her and some of the "threats" made out of anger or real I am not sure and don't want to take the chance of trying to meet back up with her and her family etc. I am sure though, that I can get a Us attorney to do it but as I said it would cost on the order of 3x and I still have to return.

My grounds are sound for an anulment since "bad behavior" or close to that, is one reason plus the fact she had a 16 year old child that I was never told about that lives with the father or grandmother. I also have the history of a chat program we used to use where she stated "I die soon" and her use of some pretty vulgar language when she is angry. She is a very spoiled lady and I just am not sure of taking the chance to go with her amicably and just sign and be done with it......anyway, I don't plan on marrying again since I am in my late 50's and have pretty much decided there is no reason for a paper anymore. I just want this to be behind me and forgotten. I could just stay in the USA I think without worrys of her trying to garnish part of my pension etc. I don't think a thai court would have the ability to do anything (Ihope) but yes, I do worry about her running up some bills etc but she is not working nor has the credit to run much up. ....anyway, I will figure out something .....thanks for the input, Noise.....have a Merry Christmas!!!!........

[XXpate48USA]

Hello marioo

you seem to be informed as to a thai divorce. I am trying to figure out what my rights are etc. I was married at a local amphur and is "legal" for sure. Now, my question is............any input will be apreciated....thanks...

Since you said "any input".......

If you want to have the reassurance of complying with any potential legal requirement, I have to ask if you have checked with a U.S. attorney to see how you might annul the marriage for, say abandonment (refusing to return and live with you in the US) or divorce for a similar reason. You might need a lawyer with some experience with US/Thai legal "relations".

And while I have never been through a divorce, I seem to remember hearing there is a way of legally stating a "separation" has taken place and, even though not yet divorced, you are no longer responsible for any debts incurred, etc., etc. I am sure you will have no problem protecting your pensions and properties.

You might google all that first. There is probably a wealth of info out there that would prepare you to spend minimum time in a lawyer's office at whatever his hourly rate is.

Thanks you, noise

Yes, I have called and checked and searched many and most of the US lawyers have said the best thing to do wouild be to get a Thailand lawyer, as one in the US would just mostly be a :go between" I contacted siamlegal and they quoted me 30,000 and they can do the preliminarys etc. but I would have to be back in Thailand for the final resolutution court hearing.

I am trying to figure a way of just not returning since I just don't feel safe requarding her and some of the "threats" made out of anger or real I am not sure and don't want to take the chance of trying to meet back up with her and her family etc. I am sure though, that I can get a Us attorney to do it but as I said it would cost on the order of 3x and I still have to return.

My grounds are sound for an anulment since "bad behavior" or close to that, is one reason plus the fact she had a 16 year old child that I was never told about that lives with the father or grandmother. I also have the history of a chat program we used to use where she stated "I die soon" and her use of some pretty vulgar language when she is angry. She is a very spoiled lady and I just am not sure of taking the chance to go with her amicably and just sign and be done with it......anyway, I don't plan on marrying again since I am in my late 50's and have pretty much decided there is no reason for a paper anymore. I just want this to be behind me and forgotten. I could just stay in the USA I think without worrys of her trying to garnish part of my pension etc. I don't think a thai court would have the ability to do anything (Ihope) but yes, I do worry about her running up some bills etc but she is not working nor has the credit to run much up. ....anyway, I will figure out something .....thanks for the input, Noise.....have a Merry Christmas!!!!........

I might also ad, that yes, I know in the US a person can run an ad in the local newspaper stating " I will not be responsible for bills other than my own" when seperated. Now, if this is a valid thing in Thailand then I will find out, so thanks for jogging my memory....I will check it out....

cheers!!

[XXpate48USA]

Firstly regarding protecting your assets in the USA, read the first line of Marios post, although it might be different if she makes it to the USA.

Secondly, I would treat Drums post with a little .................

Thanks, yes I was wondering if she could come to the usa to try and get a divorce. Can she come without an affidavit from me??....I was under the impression that she would need my affidavit of inheritance and suport in order for her to get the visa....hmmmm

[XXpate48USA]

If you don't divorce her, you continue to build up assets that have to be split with her, including any debts she or you might make. That might not be the wisest thing to do!

Also as you pointed out she would continue to be a heir to your estate.

She could, after 1 believe 3 years, divorce you based on abandonment.

Yes, this was one of my concerns too. Anything I purchase or bills I or she runs up I believe will be both of ours. I guess I will have to try and make some kind of agreement with her and try to maybe if we both agree peacfuly maybe there is a way she can just come in to sign at my atorneys office

in Thailand and sign and I give power of attorney for him or I sign with Notary in the usa and maybe there is a way....I would think she would rather have the extra attorney fee's and just sign rather than dragging it out in a thai court system....thanks!!

[XXpate48USA]

If you don't divorce her, you continue to build up assets that have to be split with her, including any debts she or you might make. That might not be the wisest thing to do!

Also as you pointed out she would continue to be a heir to your estate.

She could, after 1 believe 3 years, divorce you based on abandonment.

Yes, this was one of my concerns too. Anything I purchase or bills I or she runs up I believe will be both of ours. I guess I will have to try and make some kind of agreement with her and try to maybe if we both agree peacfuly maybe there is a way she can just come in to sign at my atorneys office

in Thailand and sign and I give power of attorney for him or I sign with Notary in the usa and maybe there is a way....I would think she would rather have the extra attorney fee's and just sign rather than dragging it out in a thai court system....thanks!!

What was I thinking when I did that?:blink: