Sticky Icky Mess

[bino]

Just found out that my cousin is spending the night away from the house with another woman leaving his girlfriend here and not returning her calls 

They are both as bad as each other.

Amazing-

I was going to suggest the same as many others... that you should tell him what is going on, but if the case is as you described, I'd bow out and do / say nothing. Let them both figure it out on their own.

I would suggest hiding or locking up all sharp instruments in case the GF decides to make "duck food" out of your cousin.

Edited November 14, 2005 by bino

[davethailand]

Just found out that my cousin is spending the night away from the house with another woman leaving his girlfriend here and not returning her calls 

They are both as bad as each other.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Welcome to Pattaya

[Johpa]

Just found out that my cousin is spending the night away from the house with another woman leaving his girlfriend here and not returning her calls 

They are both as bad as each other.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Perhaps it is just your own naivete that has been challenged from the beginning.

[redrus]

Just found out that my cousin is spending the night away from the house with another woman leaving his girlfriend here and not returning her calls 

They are both as bad as each other.

Perhaps it is just your own naivete that has been challenged from the beginning.

Lol.

So, all is well. Sorted.

If there's ever another time though, family first.

redrus.

[kayo]

Well obviously I care about my cousin a lot and it is right to say we are close.

Afterall she is already feeding many people lies.

But I must of been nieve to believe she was a friend of mine 

... Or is she actualy a true friend?

Would a real friend put this problem onto someone she cared about?

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Tricky, sticky one indeed.

Having thought this over a little bit, I feel compelled to add my opinion.

In Los, as here in guatemala, it was generally my policy to not get involved in any dealing thai´s are haveing, whether amongst themselves, or towards farang.

This is a little different though. Is your cousin thai or farang, is a question I have, but regardless he is still your cousin and that makes the point of family.

If family is involved, were I to be in your shoes, I WOULD do something, but carefully.

Towards the girl, I would mention, along the lines of,

"(girls name), listen, I don´t like the position you put me in, against my OWN FAMILY. I feel you are wrong. I am seriously considering telling my cousin what I know. How about I give you a few days to sort this out yourself. (set a time limit here) By such and such a date, if we haven´t moved on I will tell him."

Towards your cousin, mention concerns about the credibiltiy of the girl, citing woman´s intuition or something, without entering into the fact you have proof.

Mention that it would be a good idea for him to move on from this girl now, (and here you would stroke his male ego a bit, for justifiable reasons) Move on from the Girl whilst you are AHEAD, my dear cousin....

That´s my response after a little bit of thought. Obviously just broad brush strokes needing refinement.

Hope it proves of some aid.

Kayo

[dr_Pat_Pong]

Just found out that my cousin is spending the night away from the house with another woman leaving his girlfriend here and not returning her calls 

They are both as bad as each other.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Ahhhhhhhhhhh you've seen through the pair of 'em.

[Ice Maiden]

Thanks Kayo

[britmaveric]

Don't beat round the bush (no pun intended), just tell your cousin and then let him decide if he wants to continue the relationship. Then you are done with this mess.

[Mighty Mouse]

The computer borrowing Thai girl plays the game well. Full marks to her.

The cheating cousin also plays the game well. Full marks to him too.

Ice Maiden is disappointed as she didn't get the chance to snitch on anyone.

My advice is to tell your cousin's parents of the tangled web of deceit their son has entered into.

Then tell your parents not to associate with the other side of their cheating family.

Start a family feud and then sit back and watch the fun....but don't forget to keep us all informed

[dr_Pat_Pong]

The computer borrowing Thai girl plays the game well. Full marks to her.

The cheating cousin also plays the game well. Full marks to him too.

Ice Maiden is disappointed as she didn't get the chance to snitch on anyone.

My advice is to tell your cousin's parents of the tangled web of deceit their son has entered into.

Then tell your parents not to associate with the other side of their cheating family.

Start a family feud and then sit back and watch the fun....but don't forget to keep us all informed 

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

A wonderful scenario and a worthwhile outcome I reckon

[Ice Maiden]

The computer borrowing Thai girl plays the game well. Full marks to her.

The cheating cousin also plays the game well. Full marks to him too.

Ice Maiden is disappointed as she didn't get the chance to snitch on anyone.

My advice is to tell your cousin's parents of the tangled web of deceit their son has entered into.

Then tell your parents not to associate with the other side of their cheating family.

Start a family feud and then sit back and watch the fun....but don't forget to keep us all informed 

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

A wonderful scenario and a worthwhile outcome I reckon

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Naughty boys !

[Glauka]

I know this looks a little strange...

Many people may think because I've known my cousin longer and he's family then I should tell him but I'm thinking of this girls future here and her money situation, I don't want to mess it up for her...

...But I don't want to tell lies to my cousin either and aid a freelancer to do her dirty work on lots of customers because I've seen the bad effects from this.

But then again she isn't a horrible freelancer to me, she is simply a nice female that is poverty stricken and trying to make her way into this world.

But then I'm thinking she could of got herself a normal job instead of telling lies to innocent people. I'm also thinking maybe being a nice girl was another of her lies.

Annnd I'm thinking I'm a liar myself doing this to family.

I'm really confused 

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Ice Maiden I think you should think straigh...

Well if this girl told you about her "bussiness"it is maybe because she did not care about if you tell it to someone else or not...

I think she is the kind of girl who knows how to get money easily.If you tell your cousin and she finds out she will be angrywith you for a while until she moves to her next new plan...so nothing to worry about.

Is you friendship with this girl well founded?Are you going to trust her in the future?...

Your cousin do not seem an angel himself...so... that is I will do about it:

If this kind of situation is making me feel bad with myself I will just tell the girl, look you cannot use my laptop for your bussiness anymore. Not judgement involve, is just not my kind of think...first problem solve...

I will say to your cousin, you should rethink your relationship with this girl. As far as I know there is a lot of bad staff going on(on both parts)...but I do not want to get involved, because this situation is very delicate...

Try not to get much involved in others people relationship because at the end of the day is nothing you can do, really...

Edited November 14, 2005 by Glauka

[toastwars]

tell your cousin and email all the fish she is playing and tell them too

[Ice Maiden]

Yes but she dosen't come across as some nasty girl out for money and someone who wants me to tell my cousin.

She cried on my shoulder tonight telling me she couldn't put up with my cousin for much longer because of the way he is treating her.

I'll tell you a little about this girl shall I?....

Her mother died when she was young leaving her to look after her younger sister. She moved in Pattaya in search of work and got a suitable job as a waitress (I've seen photos) and then when that wasn't enough money to support her sister and herself she started working as a freelancer.

My cousin came along and said he couldn't give her much money at all, the same amount she had working as a waitress. She said yes and sent her young sister to live back home alone. She claims to of liked my cousin, hmmm.

Now she carn't put up with him any longer but she has no room to return to so she is stuck in a rut really. She decided to get in contact with some customers from before to see what they had to offer. And she trusted me as a friend to know this information.

She is incredibly shy and didn't talk to me until after a week or so. She has only one friend in Pattaya and to be frank she treats her like dirt. I'm really the only good friend she has and I feel for her to be honest.

I'm sorry for letting you all down thinking I wasn't caring and gullible or whatever but I think she may just be genuine. Or maybe I am just a stupid teenager afterall

[dr_Pat_Pong]

[britmaveric]

Ice Maiden - they all have the same stories. I think you are a trusting soul but don't believe everything you hear from someone in the business. I don't mean to be cruel, but they are professional actresses. It's work, and there business is to make dosh anyway they can - feelings don't come into play because its business.

[chonabot]

Or maybe I am just a stupid teenager afterall 

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Don't feel bad Icey , we've all been there!

[kayo]

Yes but she dosen't come across as some nasty girl out for money and someone who wants me to tell my cousin.

She ..... (snip for bandwith)

you all down thinking I wasn't caring and gullible or whatever but I think she may just be genuine. Or maybe I am just a stupid teenager afterall 

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Is her name Apple????

Deja Vu once again rears it´s ugly head.

[Glauka]

I just posted what I think about the whole thing... I am sure you have better view of the whole situation... you know the people, their lifes...

Just do what you feel is right and I am sure will find the best solution...(i think you are nearly there...)

Whatever it happens you will learn something out of it...

Good luck

Edited November 14, 2005 by Glauka

[britmaveric]

Yes but she dosen't come across as some nasty girl out for money and someone who wants me to tell my cousin.

She ..... (snip for bandwith)

you all down thinking I wasn't caring and gullible or whatever but I think she may just be genuine. Or maybe I am just a stupid teenager afterall 

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Is her name Apple????

Deja Vu once again rears it´s ugly head.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Apple :D

[Glauka]

Ice Maiden - they all have the same stories. I think you are a trusting soul but don't believe everything you hear from someone in the business. I don't mean to be cruel, but they are professional actresses. It's work, and there business is to make dosh anyway they can - feelings don't come into play because its business.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

I agree in some level but this thread of though is very extreme...Is not good to be too naive ( personal experiences taught me that but I have not learn that much ...But if you get wrong with someone you don´t know as much a lot pain can be caused...a big dilema for me...

Edited November 14, 2005 by Glauka

[Ice Maiden]

Noooo it's a female, carn't be Apple!

She is a very good actress though. I've seen the stories and thought "How can men believe that?" but I've fallen for it too!

If someone else posted this I'd think they were a bit of a fool also but this girl is great at acting. The crying was full of so much emotion.

Arggghhhhh I'm a gulliable, vulnerable teenager and I've fallen for a trap. All I keep thinking is "Was it real?" I'm pulling my hair out about this. I'm not a bad cousin or a friend

I don't usually trust people but this was just different dealing with an actress.

[ZZZ]

I have only read the first and this page of this post so I may have missed something.

In the first post you said:

"I know my cousin is staying with her for a few more months and he's splitting with her"

By that I would guess that he knows what is going on and that the two are just using each other.

[Ice Maiden]

I have only read the first and this page of this post so I may have missed something.

In the first post you said:

"I know my cousin is staying with her for a few more months and he's splitting with her"

By that I would guess that he knows what is going on and that the two are just using each other.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

My cousin thinks she is innocent but he is just after sexual favours.

I see Dr Patty watching. I know I look like a stupid troll but I'm not one really !

[ZZZ]

I have only read the first and this page of this post so I may have missed something.

In the first post you said:

"I know my cousin is staying with her for a few more months and he's splitting with her"

By that I would guess that he knows what is going on and that the two are just using each other.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

My cousin thinks she is innocent but he is just after sexual favours.

I see Dr Patty watching. I know I look like a stupid troll but I'm not one really !

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Change "thinks" to pretends and you will be closer to the truth

[RDN]

Just found out that my cousin is spending the night away from the house with another woman leaving his girlfriend here and not returning her calls 

They are both as bad as each other.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Time to move on I-M. They're both not worth any more emotions from you.

[Soph]

Yep, sod em, leave them too it.

[dr_Pat_Pong]

Yes but she dosen't come across as some nasty girl out for money and someone who wants me to tell my cousin.

She ..... (snip for bandwith)

you all down thinking I wasn't caring and gullible or whatever but I think she may just be genuine. Or maybe I am just a stupid teenager afterall 

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Is her name Apple????

Deja Vu once again rears it´s ugly head.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Apple :D

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

I knew a girl called APON. Different girlie I suppose

[Patex]

...The crying was full of so much emotion.

,

Sorry Ice Maiden/Troll,

you can't be a female, if you were one you would know that tears on demand are the easiest part of the game...

[The Dude]

Bloody hel_l. That is a very hard question. Does the cousin know ?

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

No my cousin dosen't know, he is clueless about this whole thing. My Dad has joked once or twice with him about her being a freelancer but it was all in jest, the only person that knows the truth is me and the girl

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

I suppose we need to know what your relationship with your cousin is like. If you are close, and care for him, then you should tell him.

I don't understand the girl though. Why would she use your laptop, and let you know what she is doing? Are there no internet cafes she could use and keep her business quiet?

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

I think what we need to realize here is that people who do this sort of thing are more often than not, not very intelligent. The Dude is always saddened when he hears this sort of story, and believe you me, The Dude has heard this almost identical story over and over like a broken record. Names and places changed but always a very very similar story. I want to thank The Ice Maiden for sharing this story because it is critically important for all to know. I think what is important to know here is that the girl feels deep down that she is doing no wrong. I want to warn everyone here, especially those in long term relationships with Thai women, that this is a likely scenario in your own situation. The Dude doesn't like to be the bearer of bad news but open your eyes. The Dude has gone thru this and continues to do so. The is a nightmare for The Dude. The Dude will never marry a Thai for this reason. The Dude digs his Thai g/f but can never ever be sure. He has discovered very undiggable things during his time here and there's no need to acquire any shovels to dig them with. So enjoy your relationships, my friends, but always look over your shoulders. Throw away those rose colored glasses. The Dude has spoken.