Dating Women In Chiang Mai Is Not That Hard.....

mamborobert · October 28, 2012

Funny how the word dating "professional" woman means a pants suit monied person...professional means they have a job with a defined job description like bank teller, owner of a small curtain shop, admin support for an insurance ocmpany ? Well at least years of HR tells me that ...so must be a miscom Dolly.

In the UK, professional is restricted to members of a profession, which means being a member of an institute with a royal charter. Years of study, a degree, and an exam set by the appropriate institute at the very minimum.

Agree entirely. Lawrence is describing a person's profession (or trade or job) rather than a a professional. Professional is lawyer doctor, accountant, teacher type stuff (I would also add career soldiers/diplomats etc who usually have qualifications behind them anyway)

A Bank Teller is a profession, a Bank Manager is a professional. Likewise admin support in insurance is a profession, Loss Adjuster or Re-Insurer would normally be a qualified professional. An owner of a small curtain shop is well an owner of a small business shop, that is not a profession or trade (ownership) so they are a small business owner (or they are an owner/operator or self employed...someone who works there has the profession of being a shop assistant.

You can describe most jobs as professions, but not everyone is a professional position.

Curiously there are many young? "professionals" on Loi Kroh that date and are are not qualified (purely in the academic, membership of a society sense). Perhaps like a career non comm they might best be described as career professionals rather than professionals. Not sure if any work in a curtain shop.

Edited October 28, 2012 by mamborobert

mamborobert · October 28, 2012

Dating Women In Chiang Mai Is Not That Hard.....

Who said it was?

In which case the topic would be Darting Women in Chiang Mai is Not That Hard.

I'll appologise now.

Payboy · October 28, 2012

A friend bought me a book for my birthday entitled "Everything men know about women"
It contained 80 pages.

Every one of them blank.

Hard cover or paper back?

BookMan · October 28, 2012

Words I once heard:

"If a man is not Thai, born in Thailand, and lived most of their lives in Thailand (all three), they will never know how Thai females think. The Thai men that were born in Thailand and lived all of their lives in Thailand sometimes don't know.

When a foreigner thinks they know how a Thai female thinks, they are right where the Thai female wants them."

MSPain

As a man I admit defeat on knowing what any woman of any nationality thinks.

BookMan · October 28, 2012

A friend bought me a book for my birthday entitled "Everything men know about women"
It contained 80 pages.

Every one of them blank.

Hard cover or paper back?

First Edition only was hardback

BookMan · October 28, 2012

Funny how the word dating "professional" woman means a pants suit monied person...professional means they have a job with a defined job description like bank teller, owner of a small curtain shop, admin support for an insurance ocmpany ? Well at least years of HR tells me that ...so must be a miscom Dolly.

I come back from a middle class family background...and have no quibs enjoying the high life my current profession allows me and also enjoy the quiet moments living with the locals. Done both spectrums and love both.

Age has nothing to do with relationships...plenty of youthful and older ignorance ...just depends on how much you are willing to give,

As for not giving any flattery...maybe you are one of the lucky ones...99% of the women I met in my life from the colleagues, cleaners at the apartment including my mother loves to hear flattery...hahahahahahah

This reminds me of a simlar posting I did earlier...it seems having standards or requirements or likes / dislikes is not the norm in this forum :-)

Well said Lchee, who does not enjoy flattery?

I'd have a different view of the definition of 'professionals' myself. I would only describe University educated people who work in finance, law, medicine etcetera as professionals.

FolkGuitar · October 28, 2012

Mr. Chee has his methods and they seem to work for him.

When I met my wife I gave her a list of "Men Stuff" that she was required to adhere to if we were to have a good relationship. We've been together for the past 18 years so I guess it works... for us. Your mileage might vary. Here are the list of things she needed to know;

1. Women, learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

2. Birthdays, Valentines, and Anniversaries are not considered by us to be opportunities to see if we can find the perfect present again!

3. Sometimes we are not thinking about you. Live with it.

4. Sunday = sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.

5. Don't cut your hair. Ever. Long hair is always more attractive than short hair. One of the big reasons guys fear getting married is that married women always cut their hair, and by then you're stuck with her.

6. Ask for what you want. Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it!

7. We don't remember dates. . . .Period!!

8. Most guys own three pairs of shoes - tops. What makes you think we'd be any good at choosing which pair, out of thirty, would look good with your dress?

9. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

10. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

11. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.

12. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days.

13. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't expect us to act like soap opera guys.

14. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us. We've been tricked before!!

15. If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.

16. Let us ogle. We are going to look anyway; it's genetic.

17. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

18. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials.

19. Christopher Columbus did not need directions, and neither do we.

20. The relationship is never going to be like it was the first two months we were going out. Get over it.

21. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.

22. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.

23. We are not mind readers and we never will be. Our lack of mind-reading ability is not proof of how little we care about you.

24. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing", we will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

25. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you don't want to hear.

26. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as navel lint, the shotgun formation, or monster trucks.

27. Foreign films are best left to foreigners. (Unless it's Bruce Lee or some war flick where it doesn't really matter what they're saying anyway.)

28. BEER is as exciting for us as handbags are for you.

29. Thank you for reading this; Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight, but did you know, it's like camping.

BookMan · October 28, 2012

Mr. Chee has his methods and they seem to work for him.

When I met my wife I gave her a list of "Men Stuff" that she was required to adhere to if we were to have a good relationship. We've been together for the past 18 years so I guess it works... for us. Your mileage might vary. Here are the list of things she needed to know;

1. Women, learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

2. Birthdays, Valentines, and Anniversaries are not considered by us to be opportunities to see if we can find the perfect present again!

3. Sometimes we are not thinking about you. Live with it.

4. Sunday = sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.

5. Don't cut your hair. Ever. Long hair is always more attractive than short hair. One of the big reasons guys fear getting married is that married women always cut their hair, and by then you're stuck with her.

6. Ask for what you want. Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it!

7. We don't remember dates. . . .Period!!

8. Most guys own three pairs of shoes - tops. What makes you think we'd be any good at choosing which pair, out of thirty, would look good with your dress?

9. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

10. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

11. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.

12. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days.

13. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't expect us to act like soap opera guys.

14. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us. We've been tricked before!!

15. If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.

16. Let us ogle. We are going to look anyway; it's genetic.

17. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

18. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials.

19. Christopher Columbus did not need directions, and neither do we.

20. The relationship is never going to be like it was the first two months we were going out. Get over it.

21. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.

22. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.

23. We are not mind readers and we never will be. Our lack of mind-reading ability is not proof of how little we care about you.

24. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing", we will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

25. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you don't want to hear.

26. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as navel lint, the shotgun formation, or monster trucks.

27. Foreign films are best left to foreigners. (Unless it's Bruce Lee or some war flick where it doesn't really matter what they're saying anyway.)

28. BEER is as exciting for us as handbags are for you.

29. Thank you for reading this; Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight, but did you know, it's like camping.

Good to see you kept the list FolkGuitar.

It stays on the fridge?

Edited October 28, 2012 by BookMan

TommoPhysicist · October 28, 2012

Not sure the toilet seat one works in Thailand!

LawrenceChee · October 28, 2012

good points folk guitar ...sounds like mind games to me :-)

I agree with women, I have been had my shares of ups and downs...thank god it's more steered towards the positives !

I have dated woman in Singapore, South Korea, NZ, Vietnam, China, Malaysia, USA and Thailand...but the girls up north still charms me the most....

Morakot · October 28, 2012

Very nice.

I wish my life was so perfect.

I must have read a different OP.

Slip · October 28, 2012

hahaha Semper you crack me up all the time mate with your one liners...to go and see you at the party will be worth the entry price mate !

Somnambulist - The mind games are simple mate....too many men have become too localized in their thinking and allow the women to trample over them ...to ruin their self confidence and to lead them like cows. Men are engineered to take care of women and to feel good about that, you need to feel the ego rush, the leadership position in the relationship and also to feel it is validated.

So the mind games are not mean ones to cheat or to lie...an easy example .....

how many men are stumped by this question from the women " how do I look today " and praying to your gods you answer it correctly based on looking at their moods and thei body language...a mind game I do with this is instead of being trapped in this...I take notice of their dressing and tell them my preference in colors, styles etc and viola before you know it ...the woman getting the praise start to wear your fav styles and colors and you dont have to answer these questions anymore without feeling like walking thru a minefield.

mind games also means playing it smart in front of her and her family...start to take notice of their preferences, their likes and dislikes and before you know it, they do respect you coz your remember. For a woman, this is important to emotional attachment and that they matter to you...these are mind games mate I talk about.

Mind Games are just that ....play them well and the women, their families will respect you.

I dont have a perfect life and coming close to my 40s, the lessons learnt helped me to choose better...so it would be a northern girl with charm.

What you describe as mind games, seem to me to sound the same as 'honest and genuine appreciation'. Surely you don't have so little respect for those close to you as to really think you're pulling the wool over their eyes?

or is that what you mean when you say

So the mind games are not mean ones to cheat or to lie...an easy example .....

?

Thakkar · October 28, 2012

The beauty of life is we all like different things.

One (wo)mans treasure can be another (wo)mans trash.

I have heard men praise women in Chiang Mai, and at the same turn i have heard the opposite. (Same could be said for Thai women in general, or Asian, or European, or American, or Latin, or...)

Some men actually like women to be articulate and have an opinion. Finding it stimulating rather than something intimidating or a negative quality. I have heard some men complain when a woman has too much of an "up to you" attitude, and state they can feed themselves, and find pandering to be irritating rather than pleasant. For example too, maybe your view of a womans point of view seems combative, when its merely having a voice. Just that you likely have a preference for a more placid partner.

But im happy for you! May you forever be in your idea of paradise.

Just might be worth considering that your cup of tea may not be anothers cup of tea, and putting down what you personally dont like is not a pretty trait.

I also hope you wont be writing in a few months slamming all Thai women because your concept of what you project upon on them has been burst!

I love this response.

From their earliest years, We've encouraged our daughters to argue for what they want, to make their case instead of whine. I made it clear that I'm imperviousness to whining, but open to argument.

They've grown to be confident, self-assured teens who do not feel the need to please others out of any kind of inferiority. My mom worries a little that they will not find husbands. I say the kind of husbands they will not find are the kind that are just looking for another mother. That's a good thing.

hellodolly · October 28, 2012

Funny how the word dating "professional" woman means a pants suit monied person...professional means they have a job with a defined job description like bank teller, owner of a small curtain shop, admin support for an insurance ocmpany ? Well at least years of HR tells me that ...so must be a miscom Dolly.

I come back from a middle class family background...and have no quibs enjoying the high life my current profession allows me and also enjoy the quiet moments living with the locals. Done both spectrums and love both.

Age has nothing to do with relationships...plenty of youthful and older ignorance ...just depends on how much you are willing to give,

As for not giving any flattery...maybe you are one of the lucky ones...99% of the women I met in my life from the colleagues, cleaners at the apartment including my mother loves to hear flattery...hahahahahahah

This reminds me of a simlar posting I did earlier...it seems having standards or requirements or likes / dislikes is not the norm in this forum :-)

Nothing wrong with flattery but when it is used so as they will not get to know you then it is no good. Unless you are looking for a easy physical favor.

When you find this mrs. right you will have to let her get to know you. She will eventually find out.

Flattery can be another word for shallowness.

market trader · October 28, 2012

I think I have the only wife in the world that actually puts the toilet seat back up when she leaves the bathroom.

muchogra · October 28, 2012

LawrenceChee, you are Western alright !...talking about playing the mind game and throwing around flattery.

If I've been doing that with my wife when we married at 18 for a few decades now, I don't know if we would still be married. Western women argumentative?...heck, you haven't met my wife and she is not a Western woman! We argue all the time but soon forgotten. It's called being yourself, playing the mood when it arises but, most importantly, at the same time, trying to be compromising and adaptive.

My wife hated truck. I booked a truck saying it's safer to drive a truck in Chiang Mai. She kept quiet. I took her to see the truck to choose her color. She liked the white since it was B7,000 cheaper. I said white was not metallic and would soon turn beige. She then said the red looked good. I said it's not good for our age and the dark grey was better. She didn't even open the door and see the inside. It's done!...a trcuk and dark grey. For her, it's always me driving her around, so she adapted to my liking

She doesn't even know where we live in Chiang Mai. Can you believe that? No, she is not a retard! She holds 4 ATM cards in our kids' name and I hold none. I compromise. I have only one ATM card with an account in my name and is used for paying bills and has only a minimal amount. On that, she even wanted to keep the bank book saying she wanted to keep the book. I said no! After all, a guy needs some free money for going out with friends sometimes. This money thing, about who takes the control, doesn't bother me, for she won't leave me and I won't leave her till lives do us part. Amen...

Oscar2 · October 28, 2012

LawrenceChee, you are Western alright !

don't think so. don't know him but i don't think so.

tingtongtourist · October 28, 2012

man this is some site,this guy make a nice story about Thailand woman and still everyone want to tear him apart

hellodolly · October 28, 2012

man this is some site,this guy make a nice story about Thailand woman and still everyone want to tear him apart

His wonderful story was about Professional women.

He didn't say it but I got the feeling he didn't think much of women who were not professionals.

bristolgeoff · October 28, 2012

rose coloured glasses alittle bit i think.from what i know and see in cm ,life is not a bed of roses all the time

Beng · October 28, 2012

Very nice.

I wish my life was so perfect.

Good point indeed

Beetlejuice · October 28, 2012

hahaha Semper you crack me up all the time mate with your one liners...to go and see you at the party will be worth the entry price mate !

Somnambulist - The mind games are simple mate....too many men have become too localized in their thinking and allow the women to trample over them ...to ruin their self confidence and to lead them like cows. Men are engineered to take care of women and to feel good about that, you need to feel the ego rush, the leadership position in the relationship and also to feel it is validated.

So the mind games are not mean ones to cheat or to lie...an easy example .....

how many men are stumped by this question from the women " how do I look today " and praying to your gods you answer it correctly based on looking at their moods and thei body language...a mind game I do with this is instead of being trapped in this...I take notice of their dressing and tell them my preference in colors, styles etc and viola before you know it ...the woman getting the praise start to wear your fav styles and colors and you dont have to answer these questions anymore without feeling like walking thru a minefield.

mind games also means playing it smart in front of her and her family...start to take notice of their preferences, their likes and dislikes and before you know it, they do respect you coz your remember. For a woman, this is important to emotional attachment and that they matter to you...these are mind games mate I talk about.

Mind Games are just that ....play them well and the women, their families will respect you.

I dont have a perfect life and coming close to my 40s, the lessons learnt helped me to choose better...so it would be a northern girl with charm.

My success rates with dating desirable women, of various nationalities, were a lot higher when I was in my late 30s than they are now, in my late 50s. Not only has the ladies interests towards me dwindled over the years, but also the price has gone up year by year. My pulling rate decreases and the price increases, the older I become.

I doubt if any younger guys, providing they`re not too weird or geeky, would have any problems dating desirable young ladies in Thailand, but as we get older, the choices and options regarding available women become much more limited and then how much you`re worth in assets becomes more interesting than you`re personality or how well you can chat up girls.

That`s the reality of the situation.

LawrenceChee · October 28, 2012

I'm not western, my family name is Chee and that's Chinese ancestry from the south in Guangzhou.

I grew up in a western environment from an education & society point of view and was brought up by the family Asian style to respect our heritage and beilefs and spent my latter years in Singapore where it's a good balance of east / west. My current work spans Europe, USA and Asian continent.

Hello Dolly - I look forward to meeting you when I return in Jan so that you can see my upbringing does not allow me to belittle or put a class status with anyone. My grandad would have given me a hard knock on the head if he was still alive. In 2 of my postings, my personal stated preferences have been misunderstood as being unkind.

A meeting would clear that up quickly as one of my best friend is 65, rather close to you and like you he does not think much of material wealth. I have enough and dont think much of it as well. I can spend my time explaining on a forum but I rather meet you and let you decide. A 70 year old man in his years of experience would not refuse a gentleman's offer of geuine friendship and I promise if I do bring you to one of those hotel buffets, it would be on my tab.

Dating the woman up north is just charming and such a pleasant for me. I have dated various nationalities and just stating my preference that the woman here are special to me. I never go out to cheat or play games with these ladies or their families.

I agree with BeetleJuice that after 40s, you have to work hard to get into the charms of the woman. It's the same worldwide and the ladies up north want the same. However if you are sincere, have a sense of humor and have saved enough and is financially responsible, I believe there are better options here

Those who I have met and struck up a friendship knows I value that. The acquaintances who do not know me well...kkk that's always TV ...where we can get a good laugh

Enjoy your days...in Perth today ...wish I was back in CM.

elektrified · October 28, 2012

I wish I was in Perth today.

mamborobert · October 29, 2012

I wish I was in Perth today.

Off in a week for a short break at Scarborough Beach (quick visit to family)...will think of you all (in between nanosecond breaks of good fish and chips and pizza)

Semper · October 29, 2012

A friend bought me a book for my birthday entitled "Everything men know about women"

It contained 80 pages.

Every one of them blank.

There's also a follow up entitled "Everything men should know about women", but it's only available in digital form as it would be too heavy in printed form.

turboturtle · October 29, 2012

The beauty of life is we all like different things.

One (wo)mans treasure can be another (wo)mans trash.

I have heard men praise women in Chiang Mai, and at the same turn i have heard the opposite. (Same could be said for Thai women in general, or Asian, or European, or American, or Latin, or...)

Some men actually like women to be articulate and have an opinion. Finding it stimulating rather than something intimidating or a negative quality. I have heard some men complain when a woman has too much of an "up to you" attitude, and state they can feed themselves, and find pandering to be irritating rather than pleasant. For example too, maybe your view of a womans point of view seems combative, when its merely having a voice. Just that you likely have a preference for a more placid partner.

But im happy for you! May you forever be in your idea of paradise.

Just might be worth considering that your cup of tea may not be anothers cup of tea, and putting down what you personally dont like is not a pretty trait.

I also hope you wont be writing in a few months slamming all Thai women because your concept of what you project upon on them has been burst!

They usually leave in tears out of pity for my other GF that they discover and never connect with me again, I've never dated a crazy combative control freak like many on here have in other posts, i'm with the OP on this one!

NeverSure · October 29, 2012

Funny how the word dating "professional" woman means a pants suit monied person...professional means they have a job with a defined job description like bank teller, owner of a small curtain shop, admin support for an insurance ocmpany ? Well at least years of HR tells me that ...so must be a miscom Dolly.

In the UK, professional is restricted to members of a profession, which means being a member of an institute with a royal charter. Years of study, a degree, and an exam set by the appropriate institute at the very minimum.

In the US, it's sometimes applied to a hooker.

NeverSure · October 29, 2012

man this is some site,this guy make a nice story about Thailand woman and still everyone want to tear him apart

His wonderful story was about Professional women.

He didn't say it but I got the feeling he didn't think much of women who were not professionals.

And just what is the oldest profession in the world?

NeverSure · October 29, 2012

My success rates with dating desirable women, of various nationalities, were a lot higher when I was in my late 30s than they are now, in my late 50s. Not only has the ladies interests towards me dwindled over the years, but also the price has gone up year by year. My pulling rate decreases and the price increases, the older I become.

I doubt if any younger guys, providing they`re not too weird or geeky, would have any problems dating desirable young ladies in Thailand, but as we get older, the choices and options regarding available women become much more limited and then how much you`re worth in assets becomes more interesting than you`re personality or how well you can chat up girls.

That`s the reality of the situation.

And, why shouldn't it be? I don't expect any younger woman to truly be interested in me, just for me. As in any relationship, there's a bargaining point. What's in it for me and what's in it for her? It was that way when I was 18, and only the playing chips were different.

Do I believe there is any sane (much younger) woman in the world who would be attracted to me for my sex appeal? No I don't. Do I think there are any who would be attracted so I would support her and her family? Absolutely. So we bargain.

As someone else already said, you don't have to give one the farm. They may ask for it but when they learn that all they get is this month if they are good to you, then they may stay for next month. If they walk, they walk with the few trinkets you gave them. If they are lucky there's a scooter. If they are very good and you're lucky, they stay for a very long time. If they are lucky you provide modest support for a long time. They live better than they ever have but if they leave, they can fit everything they have on that scooter.

Let's get real. Any older guy who thinks some cute young thing has eyes only for him forever is kidding himself and setting himself up for a fall.

JMO.

Edited October 29, 2012 by NeverSure

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