thedi

Question: how long of a wait could you tolerate between visits?

I am now 59, my wife is 54, we are married for 15 years. I always kept a foot in my home country (Switzerland). My wife never accompanied me to Switzerland. At first the only reason was the money: I still have a part time job there.

But after some time I realized, that I won a second live. I now have a life here in Thailand with my wife and our daughter. This is for about 8 month each year.

But twice a year, each time for two month, I go to Switzerland to work. My family stays here in Thailand - I go alone. There I have a second live with my old friends, my family, speaking Swiss dialect (we speak only Thai in our family and village here in Thailand) interesting work and in a climate and culture where I belong to too.

For me, 2 month of Switzerland is all I need to make the rounds and to come to the feeling: 'now I have enough of it'.

I think that this off-time is also good for the relationship with my wife. When we are together long time - say more than 3 month - I sometimes get the feeling, that she is 'very Thai' again - and vice versa, she may get the feeling that I am behaving 'too farang'. This is a sign for me, that a trip to Switzerland may do us good.

After 2 month of separation we see just the good sides of each other again. Kind of a honeymoon twice every year.

So to answer your question: for us, 2 month apart and then 4 month together seems to be ideal.

Having said that: I am looking forward to the time when I will be retired and do not have to do the boring flights any more. There certainly are disadvantages to have your live split over two continents. But there are good things in it too.

Regards

Thedi

Last Saturday (5. April) I arrived at Suvarnabhumi airport at 19:00. After only 40 minutes for immigration and waiting for my bags, I was in the arrival hall before 20:00. My only desire was to return to my family in Manchakiri, Khon Kaen as quickly as possible.

On the ground floor of Suvarnabhumi airport is a advertisment for busses to Pattaya and Nong Khai. I had asked in January about the departure times and was told then, that the bus to Nong Khai leaves daily at 21:00. But when I went to the counter, a 'helpful' taxi tout was there and horned in. The sales girl then told me, that this bus line does not operate any more. There were no other passengers in sight and I had no idea where the bus parked. With the sales girl not helpful, I saw no chance to get on this bus - if it still operates.

Had anybody recently used this bus: Departure 21:00 at Suvarnabhumi airport to Khon Kaen and Nong Khai?

Because the idea of 'one night in Bangkok' didn't appeal to me at all - this may have been different 30 years ago - I agreed with the 'helpful' taxi tout for 3500 Baht to my home in Manchakiri. A deal which is not so bad after all:

Compared with a Thai air flight, including taxis in BKK and KKC, the costs would have been about the same - considering the costs of a night in BKK even higher. With the taxi we took off right away - with Thai I would have had to wait for the next day.

Compared with a bus from Mo Chit: a taxi to Mo Chit and a bus there would have been cheaper, but then I would have arrived at Ban Phai at around 3 AM and would have had the additional hassle to find a transport to my home in Manchakiri (25 km). After 12 hours flight from Switzerland I was ready for a little comfort.

The taxi was not a taxi cab but an old Mercedes Benz limousine. Quite comfortable and it took us just a bit over 5 hours. The taxi tout did not drive himself, but had a driver engaged which knew his job: defensive driving but getting on the way well. At first, being one farang with two strangers - the driver and the taxi tout - in the not-taxi, - and having heard my share of stories, I felt a bit insecure. Hence, while the taxi filled up gas, I phoned my wife announcing my expected arrival time and the taxis registration plates - in the hearing of the taxi tout who let me use his phone. After that I felt secure and comfortable. I even consider to use this service again.

Regards

Thedi

PS: the taxi touts name was MR. PAN, phone 086-889-3639. He speaks fairly good English. The driver's name is ALEX (a bit strange for a Thai), he speaks Thai only.

A Thai shop owner i know has a card and he gets some reductions on the prices. But you can buy anything without a card (and without reseller discount) as well. It is still cheap.

Regards

Thedi

Just go in and take a look. It's worth the effort.

You will find many things that you can not find in Big C or Lotus like meat (ham, fish) or cheese. It is rather for (farang) restaurants or (thai) resellers. So you will find a 20kg fish, a 1 kg Parmesan cheese, a gammon of a sheep in one chunk, 20 Cervelat sausages in one pack etc.

Some articles are in smaller packs too.

It may be an idea, to start a farang-Makro-buyers-syndicate to split up big packs.

Regards

Thedi

BTW: right beside Makro is 'pratu nam', a shopping complex for cloth which is also worth the effort to take a look. Maybe more for your wife while you look at farang foods in Makro.

In 'my' village near Khon Kaen lives a Thai man who bought a pool table and installed it in his house. The next day, he was visited by the police and forced to return the pool table to the seller, because a special permission is required for playing pool.

This was about 6 years ago.

I don't know, if the police was just making troubles in hope of some tea money, or if there really is such a law. But the Thai man returned the pool table and plays Boule with his friends ever since. Boule is OK with the local police here.

Regards

Thedi

No BS, a few months ago, a girl just down the road had a accident on her motor bike, not badly hurt, but well shocked, her family lay her down on a make shift wooden table, covered with loads of blankets, went and and got a pile of special leaves and lit a fire beneath her, she lay there for about 4 hours and looked well cooked,red in the face and sweating like I've never seen before.

It is kind of a herbal sauna, usually done after an accident like a motor bike accident or falling from a tree and the like.

The custom to sleep near a fire after a child birth, is different: there are no herbs or leaves, just the heat.

The herbal sauna is practiced in our village whenever appropriate, but the after-birth-sleeping-with-a-fire is now out of fashion.

Regards

Thedi

There was a program called 'Baan Ua-arthorn housing program' started by TRT. They build thousands of small houses (3 x 6 m) for 'people with low income'. I think the price was a bit less than 200K, including land (~5 x 8 m?).

Nobody wants to live in them. In Khon Kaen there are more than 1000, in Korat an other thousand - all empty. They look like this:

Regards

Thedi

I experienced the same problem.

I can work around it by using VPN, which prooves, that the problem is with TOT.

Regards Thedi

Just go to any big building material suppliers, like Global Home or Home Mart in Khon Kaen. This is a standard equipment which they have on stock everywhere. Usually made in Japan by Mitsubishi or Hitaki etc. I have four of them (in different locations).

For your need I would suggest something with a 80 to 150 W pump. Bigger pumps make more noise.

The system base on a tank which is half full of water and half full of air. The air is compressed and makes the pressure. If your tank is higher up than the pump, you may get a problem: very slowly, the air may disappear and the tank will only contain water. Then the system will not work properly. Older equipment will have this problem more than newer generations.

In some pumps is a spring in the inlet which should be removed if the pump is less than 2 meter higher than the input water level.

Read the fuc_king manual - it comes with the pump. You save yourself a lot of chagrin.

Regards

Thedi

Just ask any tuk tuk driver: ab ob nuat in Thai. The 'ob' stands for 'sauna'.

I have a wall of about 1 m and on top of that a metal lattice of 1.5 m. This lets the wind pass - and more importantly - lets me see who passes and does not block communication with passer byes.

In Khon Kaen, the labour for a wall is between 200 and 300 baht/meter. I paid my workmen per day (200 baht + 1 bottle of lao-40 and something to grill every evening). I think I got cheaper this way - and more importantly: I got the quality I wanted and I made friends with the people who worked for me - which are neighbors.

Regards Thedi

Hi,

I would like to know the 2008 days off from school (official Thai Holidays and dates between semesters). I understand in April/May there is a long break. This would be for an 8-9 year old student attending public school in the BuriRam province. Specifically around the town of Prakham. Thanks.

As others have pointed out: it depends...

Usually there is a break between the semesters, starting from mid March to mid May, subject to the schools managers whims.

Official schools are closed on public holidays, which are marked red in any Thai calendar.

If you want to take your son/daughter to a trip to farangland or a holiday at a nice beach in Thailand, I would suggest to discuss it with his/her teacher. They are usually understanding and cooperative.

Regards

Thedi

...the land has been only periodically farmed due to laziness and available cash from other avenues...Given that I could not be there 24/7, what risks are there ?...

The $64,000 question is whether that amount of land can be used to produce an income worthy of the purchase price.

I guess you know this yourself, but here are the things that I would consider:

• Farming is very hard work. 10 rai gives a lot of work, 30 rai a lot more. There can only be profit, if the family is willing to do the hard work - not by engaging laborer - but doing it themselves.
  
• The value of any thing in this world is determined by the effort it took to get it. If you give them land to use for free, that land will have no value for them: it is not their own land (hence no emotional binding) and they did not spend any effort to get it (hence they may hope they can sell it instead of work on it). Naturally, the priority will be to make as much profit with as little effort as possible: i.e. eucalyptus which gives profit in a short time but ruins the earth.
  
• People have different priorities in their lives. If a family is in debts, the reason is, that they spend more than they earned. There are always explanations, but the basic fact remains: they will probably spend more than they earn again or they may at least spend what they got from the fields, not keeping back a part of the profit for later investments.
  

This are the problems that I would check out, before investing with any hope for a return on investments.

As for the type of crop to plant: ask them - they know this best.

Best regards and good luck

Thedi

There is a similar case in Khon Kaen: about 15 km from KKC, on the left side of road to Pra Yun, there was a very nice house with a big, beautiful garden. About 2 or 3 years ago, it was completely destroyed; only the fence and some of the garden remained. The story is, that the Thai wife had a boyfriend and the farang husband left her.

This is about 30 km from my home. I do not know anybody of this story personally - it is all just hearsay. The comments of the Thais here - which are not related to the Thai wife in any way - voice a lot of understanding for the farang and 'serves her right' for the Thai wife.

Regards

Thedi

The origins of dowries here in Thailand began with the upper classes, and was a way for the man to show the girls family that he could give the new wife a lifestyle at least as good as that she had previously received. Money was shown, but never kept.

Interesting information, which I hear for the first time.

Where did you get it?

I would be very much interested in the source of this information.

Best regards

Thedi

Maybe this issue has been discussed many times before,

Your right at that, Mike. :D

As for dowry, I will give you some examples. All in 2007 from Isarn and all personally known to me:

• Thai man (25) agreed last week for a dowry of 150K for a Thai girl (same age). Both are from Isarn, both not well situated.
  
• A farang (63) married last November a virgin (34) with univerity and good job. He paid 500K.
  
• Another Thai paid 100K last December for his Thai wife, both not especially well off, and both from Isarn.
  
• A farang (62) paid last year 300K for a girl (29) which he met in Pattaya with daughter from Kalsin.
  
• A Thai (28) paid 1 Mio for his Chinese bride (25, uni) last year, both from good standing families in rural Isarn.
  

Hope this gives you an idea

Thedi

... as I have no money left in the bank can only get a visa as I am over 50 and have a Thai child... why do they not take notice of some of the difficulties some of us have to go through to stay in LOS just for the privilege of spending our money here instead of else ware?

Maybe you will get more specific answers in Khon Kaen forum: http://www.khonkaen.com/english/forum/default.asp

Regards

Thedi

For God's sake though, don't park downstairs in their carpark; it's murder. If you actually find a space, when you get back you'll be boxed-in, you can bet on it. There are usually places outside by the Sofitel.

I bought an MD98 Talking Dict last November in Oasis Center, third floor in the 'Khon Kaen Thailand' shop. It is a great toy. Unluckily, mine had some hardware problems and is now in BKK for repairs

As for parking, I have no problems, because I drive a big bike - not a car. One of the many advantages of a big bike is: you can park it anywhere - except in a underground carpark, where some kids may fumble with it.

I think we live just about 15 km from each others: if you have google earth or google map installed, you can see my house with coordinates 16° 09’ 23” N 102° 33´ 11” E

It is in Bankok - the 'turtle village'. Going North from Manchakiri the green roofs of my house can be seen on the right of the main road. Drop in any time you like.

Regards

Thedi

What concerns me is the social side as I will be retiered. Without a decent social and intellectual side of life, beside the family live that is, one would soon dry up. Any suggestions out there?

I live in a village, 50 km from KKC for 15 years. And I like it. But the big difference is: I am fluent in Thai and do understand some Lao.

Your social concern is a concern. There are English speakers in Khon Kaen City. You can easily meet them in the bars around Sofitel hotel. But many farangs in KKC seem to be a bit on the shy side. Very often, when I meet a farang by accident, he looks away so as not to have to greet me. BTW: I am not more ugly or badly dressed than the next guy.

There are nice farangs here. But they are hard to find.

The suggestion above, 'rent an apartment or house and try it out' is very good advise.

Best regards

Thedi

Sometimes I think the Immi Officer would be happy to find any excuse for making the Farang uncomfortable,to show to him(and the other in line)that He/She has the power to accept or refuse his application...

I don't go to Bangkok,but to the NongKhai Office...

Nong Khai is different. lets ignore this office, its a 'statistical blib' (outlier)

Regards

Thedi

Thanks for all the replies and attention, but I would really like to get some opinons to my hypothesis

1. Before going to immigration a farang gets all the informations and prepares the papers for his extension of stay. Quite a few actually overdo it and prepare more papers then would be required.
   
2. On the right day, he gets dressed in a clean shirt and goes to immigration. He is sure, that his case is absolutely clear and he expects to go through the process in a few minutes. Now, that everything is ready, it is merely a matter of form to get the actual extension stamp in his passport.
   So here he comes, very confident, and enters immigration with a friendly smile on his face...
   
3. An officer checks his documentation - not friendly at all - but very carefully and suspiciously. Then asks for an additional paper, which was never required before and which our farang did not bring along. The immigration officer orders him to get this additional paper.
   

In step 3, there are many variations. He may be asked to get a newer photo or anything. But it is always frustrating for the farang: he gets the feeling, that he has no rights here and that immigration officers can grant him an extension - or refuse it - at their whim. It makes him angry, uncertain and he feels that he is at the mercy of people who neither like him nor care for him. The very basis of his live is threatened - this is something he never expected to happen to him.

While our westener societies base on the principle that all men are equal, this is not true in Thailand: the Thai society is hierarchical. A immigration officer is a high ranking person, while the farang is a applicant, hence he has a lower rank in the hierarchy.

Here is the Hypothesis:

A farang who enters an immigration office with a self-confident smile on his face, and approaches the immigration officer like a business partner, dares unintentionally the immigration officers. Hence, the immigration officer may put him into his place, by showing his muscles.

The above story is just an illustration...

What are your experiences?

Please go back mentally to your last visits to immigration: was there something that would discredit or support this hypothesis?

Regards

Thedi

the last thing they want is some Joe Soap showing they know more that the official.

If this hypothesis holds, this would certainly be true.

But an other interpretation could be, that they treat farang applicants like they would treat a Thai applicant.

Now - isn't this what long-stay farangs want: to be treated by the Thais like a Thai

Regards

Thedi

A Hypothesis: Thai immigration unintentionally assimilates long stay farangs to Thai culture

There are several reports in this forum of farangs extending their visa, which follow this pattern:

1. Before going to immigration a farang gets all the informations and prepares the papers for his extension of stay. Quite a few actually overdo it and prepare more papers then would be required.
   
2. On the right day, he gets dressed in a clean shirt and goes to immigration. He is sure, that his case is absolutely clear and he expects to go through the process in a few minutes. Now, that everything is ready, it is merely a matter of form to get the actual extension stamp in his passport.
   So here he comes, very confident, and enters immigration with a friendly smile on his face...
   
3. An officer checks his documentation - not friendly at all - but very carefully and suspiciously. Then asks for an additional paper, which was never required before and which our farang did not bring along. The immigration officer orders him to get this additional paper.
   

In step 3, there are many variations, but they are all in the same way frustrating for the farang: he gets the feeling, that he has no rights here and that immigration officers can grant him an extension - or refuse it - at their whim. It makes him angry, uncertain and he feels that he is at the mercy of people who neither like him nor care for him. The very basis of his live is threatened - this is something he never expected to happen to him.

Now here is my hypothesis:

While our westener societies base on the principle that all men are equal, this is not true in Thailand: the Thai society is hierarchical.

A immigration officer is a high ranking person, while the farang is a applicant, hence he has a lower rank in the hierarchy.

A farang who enters the immigration office with a self-confident smile on the face, and approaches the immigration officer like a customer approaches a cars salesman in a Toyota showroom, dares unintentionally immigration officers. Hence the immigration officer puts him into his place, by showing his muscles.

What is your experience?

When going back mentally to your last visits to immigration, was there something that would discredit or support this hypothesis?

Regards

Thedi

I know the Thai National has to have their ID card, but read something somewhere about the Tabien Baan. Can this be a copy? Partner's on family's Tabien Baan a lonnng way away. Thankyou for your help

Each and every Thai's name is listed in a Tabien Ban. This may be the one of her parents. This is the one to bring along.

To register the marriage later via your embassy in your country, she will need a certified copy of her birth certificate and an official paper which states, that she was not already married at the time of your marriage (i.e. single, widowed or divorced, whatever).

Regards

Thedi