Ombra

Many years ago, my wife wanted to demonstrate how well her grandsons, who were then about ten and twelve, spoke English. The boys went to a private school and they showed me a chapter from their English textbook which they had just finished studying. It was titled, 'The duties of the clergy and the laity during Buddhist Lent,' and they had memorized it. But they didn't understand a word and neither did my wife, who had learnt English while working for the US air force in Nakhon Phanom during the Vietnam War. When I tested the boys' spoken English, all that they could say was, 'HellohowareyouIamfinethanks,' as though it were a single word.

The 'Daily Beast's' website today has a story about Prince A's visit to Thailand in 2006 when he demonstrated that he deserves to be known as Randy Andy. https://www.thedailybeast.com/exclusive-new-details-on-prince-andrews-thai-orgies-expose-his-corrupt-abuse-of-power-for-sex/

Thirty years ago or more, as I got angry about some environmental issue, my wife explained the Thai solution: "If you don't think about it, it is not a problem."

I seem to remember that, decades ago, Ramkhamhaeng University faced criticism for proving easy qualifications for members of parliament - or is my memory at fault?

Sorry. I meant to say that I found it one month later.

A few years ago, I bought a small Cubic loaf for about 80 or 90 baht in Tops in Rangsit. The packet, containing one slice, got pushed to the back of the refrigerator and it was still as soft as the day I bought it. So, no more Cubic for me.

They withdrew 103 million baht from the bank in cash. Shouldn't a sum that large and the fact that they wanted the money in cash have made the bank staff a wee bit suspicious?

Mukdahan's closest airport is surely Nakhon Phanom, which is halfway to Sakon Nakhon.

These officers are heroes! It took four of them to arrest this dangerous young woman.

My last order for Arabica beans was about 30% more expensive than the price three months before.

'luxury handwoven nylon carpet' .... 'Luxury' and 'nylon' are not words that I expect to see together. And if it is nylon, who would notice it is hand woven?

On my Google News feed this morning, there is a story from the New York Times about the building that collapsed in Bangkok after the earthquake. It is written by three reporters: two men with Anglo names and an Indonesian. It includes this sentence: 'At the perimeter, the father of a Pakistani worker told reporters people were praying in temples all over Thailand.' I was surprised to read that a Pakistani was working on a construction site in Bangkok and that his father should refer to temples rather than mosques. Isn't it more likely, though, that the interpreter asked the man where he was from, and he said Phaak Isaan? Then the Americans made a mistake that Imade a very long time ago.

Half a container's worth, not a dozen pairs of jockey shorts.

I came to work in Thailand in the late 1980s. In those days, a person's baggage used to come by sea. When mine arrived, a bloke phoned to tell me. When I asked him how long it would take to clear the Customs, he said it would be anything from six days to six months. Depending ...

Why does the policeman have his hand on the bloke's shoulder and not his throat?