CanuckThai

Wow...good luck and all the best to the OP.  I'll share this one (I'm always reminding the kids....If it's not yours, don't touch it)

1 hour ago, grollies said:

No but you could try beating the crap out of him. Won't get you your money back but you'll feel much better for it.

3000B?  Well...have him whacked, forced disappearance....TIT.   

3 hours ago, Dragon Master 01 said:

If you have a girlfriend that your livingn with or wife in your Country you support them and if you didn't you'd be in a lot of trouble from them as well as the law in a lot of Countries so if you care about a Thai woman aren't they worth the same as women in your own Country???
I myself think the Thai Women are worth far more than any European Woman because the Thai women are far more Loyal and the only thing I wanted to change with my Thai wife was to teach her to use a washing machine and let machines do the work for her so she could relax and enjoy life more that was the hardest thing I had to do with her because from littlen children they are taught to obey a male and serve and work hard or they would die from lack of money to survive and there are a lot that do because the Foreners and Bosses take advantage of the Thai women and how hard they work for almost nothing and don't give the Thai women a decent hourly wage it's usually a monthly wage and not based on 8 hour days but as long as the bgoss wants you to be at work and after a while any body wears down and when they get sick they usually can't just take time off to get well first because the bosses don't pay them enough for them to ever have those Priveledges and secondly if they have time off because their sick most of the time when they can get back to work which is usually the next day of 2 days later most Employers have already replaced them and they have NO Work at all so they can end up on the street very easily or even Dead because the bosses just use and abuse them
I myself think Thai women are exceptional in every way 
I'll probably get a lot of flak from my comment but it's true and there is no Employment security over there you just work as hard as you can as long as you can and hope like hell you can get a better job and earn enough to stay fit and have some sort of life and find a good guy who will support them and Love them like they deserve but very few get that dream because most guys just want to use them and give them nothing but it's not just in Thailand that the women get used so badly it's most Asian Countries and also Philippines and Mexican and Spanish the women are used to look after their parents when the parents get old and at the same time have to look after their husbands who usually don't help and the women also have to look after the husbands family that's why these days most Thai and Asian Women try and find a good White guy and even that can be hard for them as most guys use them and seem to think that their worth nothing like a guy I know that was married to a Thai Woman here in New Zealand and when he told me to stay away from his place when I was trying to find out some information 
I told him that I could understand if he didn't want me any where near his wife because she was Beautiful and then he told me he wasn't Jelouse and that Thai woman were a dime a dozen which he changed to a Dime a thousand Thai Women and I told him his attitude really sucked and to me he wasn't worth shit because he didn't respect her and after a little while she had had enough of the guy and went back to her home in Thailand with her daughter and left the <deleted> here on his own to do everything himself till he found another slave 
But that's the case with a lot of European guys they use the women like slaves 

 

....breathe buddy

Wife and I were at Pullman in Khon Kaen for a couple of days over the long weekend.  Wine prices on the menu jumped again, there was no wine bought to accompany meals, plain and simple.  A couple of cocktails and a few beer...no wine, a sad state.

18 hours ago, mstevens said:

  More and more, I feel Thailand is best enjoyed as a tourist, and not as a resident.

I had a conversation about this, with my neighbor (also farang) and his wife (Thai) this week when we ran into each other, at the grocery store.  

We weren't bashing Thailand, but definitely agreed that the panache is lost over time (for him and I).   We are at different stages (him being retired, myself still working), but both here long enough to see/experience enough of the + and -.   ...and the - can begin to outweigh the + once the jungle fever wears off.   

He joked a bit and said, if anything ever happened to his wife (he winked at her), he'd pack a carry-on bag (abandon everything) and be on the first plane to.....  Even his wife, says the only thing she misses when they're not in Thailand is the food.   

Sounds like typical Thai male mentality, accompanied with the childish chest pounding.   Keep your communication simple ...but include something like this:

What is the longest extension of stay (using this method) someone can apply for?  I noticed on the TM7 form, there is the question "I hereby request x amount of days". 

How many times can someone request an extension using this method?  (eg: cheaper to do an extension when needed as apposed to a visa run)

A bit crazy....

Not to hijack the thread, but all farang groceries/product prices, over the last year seem to have jumped.  Here's my weekly Big C tab, a bit higher than normal, weekly is usually around 3kB, used to be closer to 2kB +/-   3 of us in the house, fruit and veg bought at local market.

Interesting thread.  Changing the major rules/mindset mid game isn't cool.  

Most will set out "the plan" prior to committing to a long term relationship.  Yeah, yeah...things change,  plan B and adjustments take place, and life continues.  But these guys that bought a slave/concubine wife and promised the world (a salary for the wife, parents, bothers/sisters and cousins) and then pull the plug or do a 180, deserve what they get (and wreck it for a lot of people).  If you're dating, or it's a girlfriend...choose your budget, over selling is brutal.

I looked for and landed a woman educated, employed and has particular compatible traits/acumen/ethics/goals.  It was no problem communicating and setting out life choices and a budget between us.  We both contribute a matching percentage of our incomes, covering monthly expenses, eg: my 25% is far more baht then her 25%, but it's still 25%.   This keeps the wat donations, relatives sick buffalo's, whatever she chooses...her choice, within a budget.  It maintains "skin in the game" for both of us, if one of us decides to pull the plug, we both incur a loss. 

I pay for trips back home, but her buying gifts for my parents/family, or taking them out to lunch/dinners and treating them to her generosity, is nice.  

Don't be panty waste like the guy in the videos below...

I have a buddy back home, that has a similar issue as the OP, except his issue is with the US immigration.  He apparently has the same first, middle initial and last name of another Canadian, that has an extensive criminal record.  

He carries a government letter clearing the way for any IO's to easily confirm he is not the bad guy.

If Thailand is the only country with entry issues, request a Thai document from Thai Immigration, that an IO can use to easily get you through the entry process (what ever that document may be).

In reading the heart warming article about the 93 y/o Swiss gentleman who arrived to reunite with his wife, I began asking myself a few questions about being in LOS in my twilight years.  I'm in no where near retirement, but what about when things become increasingly challenging, as the years go by (whatever age that might be).  How does one plan for very old age as an expat in LOS?

A couple of serious questions (please add anything that one might have to consider to prepare/plan/budget for).

Does someone in their late stage of life still have to report to an IO?  Is there an age that this gets waived?

What would the annual cost be to maintain your Thai residency (visa, agents, reporting etc. etc)

What happens if you end up struggling with Alzheimer's, Parkinson's or a cognitive issue?  Eg: IO comes for a visit, and you can't remember your own name, let alone what country you're in.

Obviously health insurance/coverage, medications becomes an issue.

A couple of well placed mini video cams (with sim card or wifi), to start compiling your defense,  and the proof "separation" was required for your own safety (and hers).

Light her up a few times, get her rolling on all cylinders....  Defend yourself as any person normally would....  Voila!

Good luck, sounds like a nightmare.

Seems par for the course we're on.  Not good, but is anyone shocked, flabbergasted or expecting strong communication and transparent leadership?

I'll never be able to show my face at my local Friday market again (especially around the fish sauce vendor dude, and crunchy cricket vendor lady).  I've been wearing my Timex... I'm sure they noticed.  ?

8 hours ago, superal said:

Yes but lets face it you were in a good 5 star hotel and you are gonna pay for that .

Did you try their lager from their own micro brewery ? very good , best beer I have tasted in Thailand and not too expensive . 

Absolutely!  Honestly, after checking in, it's the first thing I do when we arrive.  The Kronen is really tasty.  We usually try to get in for a weekend once in a while, to blow the village stink off...

My wife and I met up with a few friends for dinner (pretty good buffet) at the Pullman in KK.  I was ficking shocked at the markup/price of the wine list (compared to price of same product back home or elsewhere not in LOS).  8 of us ploughed through 11 bottles of reasonable various reds (nothing extravagant).  Everything (if I recall) was 1500+ to 2500 for lower to middle of the road...(yes , hotel/bars have a markup...but...but)  Back home, or in neighbouring countries here, some of the exact same bottles can be bought for  $15-20

15 hours ago, observer90210 said:

Why not set up a parallel supply chain of wines at less of a ripoff cost, with all the visa runners, each time they leave the country ?! ?. Unless it's forbidden to bring in booze at road borders ?  The hardest thing is to find amongst your friends and acquaintances, those who never buy booze on each trip for their own stock?

Visa runs and friends/family visiting...everyone knows the routine....lol

23 hours ago, Happyman58 said:

Ok, I have read what you guys have written and can relate to that. I think most farang husbands are in the same boat. The fav saying from Thai ladies is "Up to You"

"Or I do not understand" that's another favorite

 

When you say you want 5,000 baht they seem to understand that. I am afraid my wife has two bad habits. One is she loves to gossip and the other is it's ok for her to go out with her Thai mates for hours and cant give a time when she might make it home. Tomorrow we were asked to go to Lunch with a group of farangs and their Thai wives and she is making every excuse not to go. Why do I wonder? Do they feel uncomfortable with a group of farangs or do they just like Thai company? She cant see my way of thinking. Hey, I don't want to go but I will go maybe he might make some friends. Does anybody come across this? I think they want you to sit at home know nobody and they go out and enjoy themselves

I think some Thai women are frightened of situations, where they may lose face in a non-Thai speaking crowd.

I experienced a situation a few months ago that was interesting.  I met a farang and his Thai girlfriend a the local market, my wife knew the man's girlfriend, I had never met the farang before.   He was from Canada, so we struck up an enjoyable casual conversation about current events going on back home, and different places we had experienced here .  Simple.  My wife enjoyed the conversation, and was actively participating.  The Thai girlfriend (who could speak some english), petered off somewhere while we chatted...   

Found out later, from my wife (and later by the farang), that the Thai girlfriend thought we were talking (gossiping) about her, and  dumped the farang to save face, thinking he now knew her colorful history.  

Whatever you decide to buy her, make sure it has bragging potential, when she posts it on social media to her friends.  Brand name (western) perfume, a small purse, jewelry (gold obviously)....and prepare to shop while here.  If all else fails....Iphones work nicely too...555

OP this is Thailand....  Ladyboys or fellas a little shy in the testosterone department scaring you?

My wife is in the medical field, a lot of ladyboys, feminin or gay men.   I used to be really uncomfortable with the semi touchy , feelies always pulling me,  to have a their picture with the farang, at social/work gatherings .  Wife and her female coworkers would see my discomfort,  would have great chuckles, show a little skin and ask "you want that or want this"....555

You'll win more points by having a sense of humor, mai pen rai.

As many have posted before, we (non Thai) are firmly positioned somewhere between the neighbors dog and a long since dead 2nd cousin, in Thai family alignments/hierarchy/dynamics (except between you and your wife/kids).

On 4/9/2018 at 6:05 AM, kannot said:

 

Most of them want the money but want to do as  little  as  possible as badly as  possible , the work ethic  is appalling here, thats the reality of staff weve seen in general, there are exceptions, the Wifes  sister is a great worker but she lives in Loei and she doesnt  want to live down here and weve found also in the Wifes  business of condo management and sales that out of every 10 workers you might find ONE who is the exception, works  well,  rarely  ill, clean , tidy , thoughtful, careful and they get well rewarded, the vast majority are  dross, doesnt matter what you pay them, doesnt  mater how  kind  you are with them, theyll take and take and take and give nothing back.

Some people commenting here it seems they have zero actual experience of the reality of hiring staff in Thailand.

 we  pay one man 16k baht a month, thats a lot for this  work and plenty enough for Thais to  more than survive on especially  with the job perks of free  house, electric,  water, motorbike, fish, rice etc

It's been interesting to read through this thread.  I look forward to reading how you solve the puzzle.  Working without a "high position", super title or a facebook "like" generating gig is not cool for most Thais . 

Post the position as "director of operations"....post to universities, and offer "ground-up" operations training and or co-ops.  

I was joking and kidding around with my wife this weekend, when I said... "OMG, this reminds me of when I was working at the office in Chon Buri".   I was referring to her son, his motivation/ethics, laying on the couch while we were working around/beside/above him.   He gets out of bed, moves to the couch, phone glued to his face 24/7, doesn't listen (to anyone),  "gently" teaching/coaching basic life skills 100's times...nope, no chance of offering his assistance around the house, show up on time...555 best of luck, only shows a resemblance of pleasantries when a cash infusion, "gift" or opportunity to flaunt is involved.   

For Thai men, ego trumps humility.   For Thai women....well