CM Dad

That's another reason to learn Thai if you choose to live in Thailand.

Looking at your photo, you would have to pay someone to share your bed.

I agree with Brit Tim. I didn't understand what your original post was about either. In fact, I still am confused about what you are asking. Perhaps you need to write more clearly and maybe even give more information. For example, what kind of service are you requesting at Chiang Mai Immigration? If you are trying to extend your visa then what kind of visa do you currently have? It would appear that you are the one who needs to 'chill'.

Nobody would buy them since they are worthless.

Agents prepare paperwork. They do not appear at immigration offices in place of foreigners. The agents do not help people hide. You posted that you do not use an agent. I believe you since you have no idea what an agent does.

If I am not happy with a hotel, I simply move to another. I do that even if I have already paid for one night.