mr_hippo

Is she related to Hans Christian Andersen?

An oldie but still a goodie

A bit crude but.......

I wish I was a golden ring

Upon a ladies hand

Every time she wipes her ar5e

I'd see the promised land.

Roses are reddish

Violets are bluish

If it wasn't for Christmas

We'd all be born Jewish

When I worked in Saudi, I had a letter that went on holiday. First to South Africa, then to Zimbabwe, Congo, Angola, Mozambique and finally Saudi. My wife used the abbreviation KSA for Kingdom of Saudi Arabia but its first port of call was RSA (Republic of South Africa).

Do other countries postal services take the same care as the British Royal Mail with strangely addressed letters? Addresses like: Mrs. Smith(the one with the Jack Russell terrier), The house with the blue door, opposite the Shell petrol station near the railway bridge (town's name). That letter would be delivered!

UG, you still haven't got the hang of this reading thing, have you? I want you to describe my 'type' in your words. Do not copy your friends homework and no plagiarism either.

UG - would Mr Hippo be cringe worthy??

Don't worry, I've be called worse but I am concerned about UG's last statement - "Have you ever seen a Westerner who acts like this that you would want anything to do with?" - reminds me of the old playground taunt "If you talk to him then you can't be friends with me!"

Please, UG, describe my 'type'.

You forgot the all important B.O. and hand holding with someone 30 years younger just doesn,t look comfortable to my eyes.

marshbags

I did think about including the large age difference but, occasionally, it is parent and child/stepchild - not very often but it does happen.

The Cringeworthy Faux Pas Appearance Awards

1) Wearing socks with sandals/flip flops (thongs)

2) Balding grey-haired farangs with pony tails

3) Dress shirt with tie not properly tied

4) Dress shirt with tie not properly tied and shirt not tucked in

5) White socks with teacher's 'uniform'

6) Ladies in mini-skirts who ought to have stopped wearing them decades ago

7) Trainers with business suits

8) Farangs whose clothes have that 'slept-in' look

A few more

There is a very good reason why I don't drink, my ex was the alcoholic. Her habit cost me a hel_l of a lot, both financially and emotionally, but she paid the ultimate price - she drunk herself to death.

Well, I'll tell you what boys ... I like Mr Hippo ... he's got a dry, canny sense of humour even if he is a tad reclusive at times ... and if you ever feel you need a bit of non hippo company Mr H, you just give me a call and I'll fire round with a crate of fresh frothy ales ...

Call round by all means but bring some tea bags (not the cheap Liptons's floor sweepings) - I don't drink alcohol.

Most of us are entitled to a 30-day stay without a visa. What is the penalty, if any, for overstaying for a few days? Do they charge a fixed amount per day of overstay? (I may choose to overstay for a few days instead of doing a visa run.)

Hunghung

when you leave via airport 500 bath a day maximum 20.000 bath,if you are caught to be illegally in thailand : monkeyhouse,so up to you.

I have been known to have 6 or 7 showers in a day but isn't 500 baths excessive?

StateSix, yes I did teach but not any longer.

kmart - ther's a better game called 'Hungry Hippos'. I bought Mrs Hippo one for Christmas but no ducks included!

Jet, you will find the hilarious question if you search through yesterday's posts and replies!

Ulysses G., I will type this slowly as I know you can't read very fast (or accurately). 'Crossing the street' was used figuratively, not literally as I have already said in an earlier post. I choose not to associate with Westerners, just as I choose not to associate with bar girls, golfers and politicians - this is my choice and not yours.

kmart, your ignorance is showing, we are not members of the Bovinae family but of the Hippopotamidae family and are not related. Yes, hippos can attack but so will any animal; even domesticated ones have been known to.

davidjtayler, why do you think that I teach?

Finally, why do I read and post on this forum? For the comedic value, this site has given my wife and I a lot of giggles - perhaps one of the biggest one was posted yesterday and we are still laughing about it and it was not in the joke section.

I have no insecurities, am quite happy and content with my life, how is yours?

[Weren't you talking about a small town WNW of BKK?

I made no mention of any town, small or laarge.

Hippo- what do you think Thais do in a small town in the US when they see each other? Do they most typically avoid each other? Of course not, they look, evaluate whether Thai or some other East Asian, and then ask the person, generally in Thai, if they're Thai. If so, they typically chat and get together to eat, even if one is a former bar girl from Isaan and the other teaches Thai at the university.

How many westerners are in Bangkok?

How many Thais/Asians are in your average Podunk, USA?

So?

I'm sure that you are right Terry, but whenever I visit a small Thai town with no foreigners, I see guys like this running across the street and murmering to themselves so they won't have to say hello to another Farang.

Are you getting paranoid? "Running across the street and murmuring to themselves" - are you sure that they do this just to avoid you? Do you think they are talking about you? Could they be speaking on a hands-free mobile phone?

My sentence 'I cross the street to avoid them' seems to have been taken too literally. What gives any Westerner the right to come up to me, a complete stranger, and ask me where am I from, how long have i been here and other banalities? Would you approach a stranger in your home town and ask him? Am I racist? No, very selective about the company I keep.

I am pretty sure that Mr. Hippo is taking the p*ss.

cricky's MR G,

you dont have to be a brain surgeon to realise that the bloody hippo is having a top laugh.

i just wish a few other people could see that.

maybe me and you just have an advanced sense of humour.

Sorry, both wrong! No p1sstake, no joke.

My sentence 'I cross the street to avoid them' seems to have been taken too literally. What gives any Westerner the right to come up to me, a complete stranger, and ask me where am I from, how long have i been here and other banalities? Would you approach a stranger in your home town and ask him? Am I racist? No, very selective about the company I keep.

The original poster reminds me of my ex-wife - used to travel all over town to find which supermarket had the cheapest. The time wasted and petrol used far outweighed the saving. Now if you were thinking of changing about 5 million Baht then it is a different matter.It's not worth the messing about to try and squeeze every last satang out of the deal.

XP works for me, is there any benefit in changing. In my, never too humble, opinion, the best version of windows was Windows 98.

The last time that I was in Geneva, I was astounded, no, make that 'flabbergasted'. Did you know that they have no Baht buses (or should that be Euro buses) and no motor-cycle taxis?

I am from WNW of BKK. I do not mix with any Westerners, I cross the street to avoid them. When i was teaching, I was often invited to go out for drinks after work - Sorry, but I have been here with you for the past 8 hours and that's enough for me. Anti-social? No, very, very particular!