fredwiggy

I had three marriages that didn't work. Other girlfriends we parted company amicably, future plans weren't the same, as many do when things don't seem to be going in the same direction. You failed once, and you say your kids don't want to talk to you because your wife didn't allow this. We know different don't we? My children talk to me weekly, with the exception of one, who went to live with my first wife and has not done well in her relationships with men, and doesn't talk much to any of us because my ex is a very disturbed individual, and when you stay long enough with that kind, your thinking is skewed. When a relationship that isn't meant to last ends, it isn't a failure. It brings a chance for a better one the next time. Staying with the wrong person for any reason doesn't help anyone, including the children. Getting to know someone for many months is a lot better way of knowing if you're compatible. I didn't do that in a few relationships and it didn't work out because of that. You said you only failed once. Was your ex wife your only relationship with a woman? If not, how did the others end? And bringing God into this because in other posts I have told of my belief? God is always on your side, unless you turn your back on him. Then you have nothing, because most things in life end, and of course your life ends eventually. If you don't have God when that happens, you will see what happens, because we all talk to God eventually.

You disagreeing means nothing. Your relationships are transactions, besides the one where you left your kids in England ,saying your wife stopped you from seeing them, which is as we all know, BS. You can always see your children unless you have abused them to the point where the court doesn't allow visitation, which is very extreme, because some will still get supervised. No, you gave up on them, so your opinion here means absolutely nothing. I, along with millions of others, have had failed marriages because I picked the wrong partner. I got custody of my children because I was,and am, a good father, and I was always, including now, good to my wives and now girlfriend. Attraction to women doesn't mean you don't make mistakes ,and staying with the wrong partner happens to most of us, as most relationships either fail or those that stay are miserable. Trying to understand the other side by reading countless books and articles means one thing. I care enough to have a good relationship with the right partner, and I don't purchase them. All relationships are not transactions like you believe. What you live isn't what everyone else lives. You disagreeing with me shows me, by your lifestyle also, that you don't understand what does go on in a normal relationship between a man and a woman, but only pay for your pleasure and her greed. I am good to my partners, and treat them as equals, and do more than my share of work raising the kids and household duties, along with looking at my partner as a partner, and not an object for my pleasure. And by the way, I initiated all three divorces, and the second and third didn't want them, and the third still wants to come back. The second one died last year. You aren't even in the race pal.

I, nor anyone else, knows everything about anything. I have 6 children, so I'm in a position to understand the variables of parenting. Being a stepfather does give you some semblance of understanding, if you raised the children from birth to adulthood. You may indeed know some about children. I can only go from what you've said in the past.True, people lie, here and everywhere, so the truth is sometimes not in a few typed words.

And they are also ,like you, making guesses. Educated guesses yes, but still guesses. A thousand years ago, we didn't have space exploration, world travel, satellites, powerful telescopes and computers. We've come a long way, our scientists have, but they are still making guesses on a lot of things. A scientist excels in a field which you nor I are facile, and they can deduce a lot of things that we for now, cannot. It doesn't mean they are right with everything. They have not proven in any way that the universe was created with a big bang, and to you it might not make sense that we have a creator, but to millions of us, it does. We cannot yet prove it also, but like I mentioned, faith is what we go by, not other's guesses, even if they carry some possibilities. Matter can not come from nothing, period. Everything in this universe is composed of matter, electrons, protons, neutrons-- atoms. If it doesn't make sense to you, you are believing other, imperfect humans on what they believe to be true. Science is there to prove things to be true. Doesn't always work. God makes sense to me, because matter had to be created.

As far as I believe, and it's over our heads, God was always here. I don't like to think about it, because we all think of everything having a beginning and an end. I believe there is life on other planets, but were they far more intelligent and more civil, where they didn't need Jesus to come and save them from themselves? There was obviously Homo Habilis, Neanderthal, Homo Erectus, and others before Homo Sapiens, but I'm guessing God put them there for our history. Was there an Adam and Eve? Possibly, and did God allow incest for our future? Did he create other races at the Tower of Babel, to help us accommodate to different climes? God can create a universe and everything in it, he can do anything. That's what we believe. And that's for another topic

Why would you ask an 80 year old why they are on steroids? What positive outcome would there be? HGH maybe, which helps older individuals, although it has risks also.

Actually, a creator makes the most sense anyway. I'm not a fanatic, whatever that means to you, but a believer. No one has a better explanation. Believing a scientist because they might have some knowledge in things scientific doesn't give them leeway to be right on other things. Hypotheses are still guesses, although educated ones, but still open to be proven wrong. If one sits down and thinks about all that goes into every species on earth, the world itself, what is necessary for all species to survive, the human brain ,the universe and all we actually know that aren't guesses, it makes sense that it has to have been created, and all that is here didn't come from one "bang". Some are gullible and believe scientists for one reason or another, and some believe that there is a God because of what we've seen since birth, and of all of the variables of everything that exists. To end this argument, which cannot be proven either way, everyone will see when they die what the truth is, and some might be disappointed.

What country are you referring to? In America, it's been Memphis, Baton Rouge, Detroit, Phoenix and others leading the pack. . Dominican Republic, South Africa, Thailand , Central Africa Republic, Vietnam, Malaysia, The US, are among the worst countries.

matter, material, articles, or activities of a specified or indeterminate kind that are being referred to, indicated, or implied.

I'm not being deceitful. I meant the scientists that say there was a Big Bang, meaning everything came from a singularity, which is matter. Matter can not come from nothing. Guessing there has been more than one universe is an opinion, a guess. If there were more than one God, you would see evidence of them fighting for control. Our only God chooses to remain silent. It's called our faith, and isn't a subject for this post. You have your opinion, and you will see for yourself when you pass, and then it might be too late for you.

I like the one where millions of people believe scientists that say the universe, which is all matter, just happened to come from nothing. Matter created from nothing. That it came from a singularity,a speck of matter, but what created that singularity, or did it just "happen". A lot of us know better, although you could say that's others opinions. Could be, but who wants to take that chance, because the outcome is permanent either way?

https://www.thecrazytourist.com/22-best-fishing-destinations-canada/

An opinion, a view or judgment formed about something, not necessarily based on fact or knowledge. Links can be others opinions also. Facts are proven.

There are a lot of people using this forum, and you'll get a lot of opinions, and some good or bad advice. Anyone can make an opinion, and that's all it is, an opinion. It could be right or wrong. Some here are knowledgeable about certain subjects, and they aren't giving their opinion but a reply that is fact based. Some will answer after they have researched, because they want to add their two cents worth, or maybe to help by looking up facts about a subject., and they truly want to be helpful. Many will use emojis to express their opinion without thinking things through. Some use them to insult, then use a smiling emoji to try and counter that insult with a deflection from that insult, although it is still the same. Some are too lazy, or busy to reply, and use an emoji to answer a post because it's a quick answer. Some use a confused emoji because the post actually is confusing to them, or that it's again, an insult, thinking if they say they're confused, it's them thinking you're the one that's wrong. Lastly, some are narcissists, and they always think they're right, and replying with an emoji is a cheap answer saying you're wrong, because of course they are right.

If you read what he posted, it explains what his wife is doing as far as valuing his opinion regarding their daughter. That is one of the problems in relationships, and it leads to more. His daughter might come across as not valuing his presence because she relates better to her mother, who might be overbearing and scary to her, whereas her dad might be the gentle, quieter one, and not the one in control here. How can one person feel the same emotions as another? They are two separate people, and one is 9 years old, which means she doesn't have near the emotional intelligence as an adult would. She is listening to her mother, and doing what she says. And some parents shouldn't be parents, and lead some children to their demise. Living your life through your children isn't a good thing for either party. Wanting your kids to succeed is normal. Pushing them for your own agenda isn't.

Beating a child to teach only teaches that violence is the answer. My ex did this also, going to her daughter's school after she stole money from my wallet, maybe 200 baht. I told her before she left to just wait until she came home, and ground her for a few days, with an explanation why. She went to her school, and beat on her in front of the class. I understood where she learned this when she said her dad used to hit first and ask questions later, and when she hit me 6 times for no reason besides being mad at others, me for something very small that didn't warrant hitting and her lack of self control in many other situations. Take away their cell phones awhile. That hurts more than anything and teaches them that what they did was wrong and deserved punishment.Millions of kids here rarely see their parents anyway, with grandma left in charge with her form of discipline.

Which is why you shouldn't bother replying, or giving advice, because you don't understand what goes on in a family with your own kids. Thailand has a multitude of women who are narcissistic, who live their lives pushing the golden child to do good so they can look like they did it all themselves, when it was the child's desires who put them ahead. If the child fails, they blame others, and the child will be diminished in their eyes, saying he never listened to me. A child needs 8 hours sleep, for his or her health and mental stability. This child is still under 10, and their most important part of life is being healthy, and that means playtime ,a healthy diet,(which isn't easy here with permissive parents giving them junk all the time), enough sleep, and doing well in school. Just because a child is gifted in a subject doesn't mean they are going to succeed in life. It gives them a little better chance than others, but this country's schools are lacking in so many things it doesn't mean much until they go to college. They pass children who are failing a subject to get them to the next grade, which isn't helping them in any way. Ending a marriage isn't the best choice, unless it means your child has a better future, and with your wife being that stubborn, it doesn't look good, as communication between partners is the most important thing, and lack of it is the reason relationships fail. Been there . Moving back to your country would probably be the best bet, although losing a mom isn't good, unless she only looks at that child as her success story and not the child's. Schools are much better most anywhere besides here, and the child has a much better chance of doing well in another country as far as work. Your child's future is more important than anything else you can do, but your stability comes first to ensure that happens, and a marriage where this happens isn't going to help that kid anyway. You both have to agree on things regarding your child, and if that isn't going to happen, as the leader of the family, you have to make the decision that's best for your child.

The propensity to pick up an object to hit someone with is ingrained in these people from childhood. Nary a week goes by that I don't see someone hitting, or going after another, usually smaller person with a stick, club, rod, bar, piece of wood or machete. Just yesterday, taking my child to the local village clinic, saw the nurse continuously hitting a (her?) child with a stick, for doing nothing than being a child complaining about something or other. Same place awhile back, was waiting for the doctor to see my child, sitting with the other parents (grandparents), and saw a mom holding a stick, and hitting her child whenever the child tried to wander a few yards away. Quite a few times I've seen this, moms walking around with their kids, holding a stick. In America this is abuse. Anywhere, it's a cowardly act. You can use your open hand to smack a child on the butt if they misbehave. Daily, you see others going after people one against four or five, hitting, kicking, hitting with sticks, or one running after another with a machete, on TV. Pretty sad, cowardly thing to teach your kids.

Answering both questions at the same time. Think a little. You think I didn't know Texas was a state, living in America 62 years,and Texas for 32? Not worth arguing about. You know what I meant.

I agree with some of that statement, not lumping all into one group, because there are two kinds of bar girls. Taking away the some that have done it because their parents pushed them into it, and quitting because they realized it wasn't them or what they wanted. Staying with the ones that have a background of abuse, rape or neglect. Sex for money, a transaction. No feelings, love or otherwise, just a means to an end. Most women want the same things, and being taken care of is one, no matter where you came from or what you do. But, normal thinking and living women look at men first as a partner to love them, and to take care of them and to protect and respect them. Some women look at men as money first, because they are greedy and only care what a man can do for them, not caring much about the love aspect, but what they can get. This kind of bar girl is a different animal. They came from abuse , neglect or worse. They look at men to take care of them also, and some might want the fantasy of being in love, but doing what they do for money and why they got to that place has skewed their thinking into one thing. What can I get for selling my body to men I have little interest in, besides the money I can make to buy things, that I'm probably disgusted with, turned off but put on an act to get that cash. Of course they would rather (not all) marry a farang and only have sex with him because he can buy her things without having to have sex with any others (besides the ones that are totally messed up and cheat on their husbands),and there's a sense of security in having one man that has enough money to live comfortably on. In any event, promoting this business isn't helping but hurting these women, because without Johns, they would be forced to live a normal life, one with less money, but without the risks of being beaten,killed or dying from a disease.

No, I was answering to your statement "Fortunately there are no prostitutes in Texas."

I lived in Texas 32 years, and I'm pretty sure, although some might argue the point, that Texas is a state. Intelligence comes in many forms, as you should know if you're over 18. Some are IQ, wisdom,common sense, intrapersonal, interpersonal, musical, spatial, linguistic, etc. Some women can have a high IQ, and still be ignorant of the ways of men. Some can be a genius in figures, and not know how to use a computer, and so on, if you understand my point. Everyone makes mistakes, just like I did when I hired a couple working girls, but you learn from your mistakes, or you just repeat them over and over. I didn't want a disease back then, so I stopped. Awhile after, I realized women were precious creatures, and men shouldn't take advantage of them. I went through relationships, always looking for a permanent one, but sometimes they are damaged goods, and don't know how to make a relationship work. But I, like others, wanted a woman around, so I continued looking. A woman can be hurt as a child by family members, and choose this lifestyle, not for a lack of intelligence, but because they live what they've seen or felt growing up, not understanding it was a bad decision for them to make until they went through it and looked back and felt shame or discomfort.

Losing money is about the best teaching method known. If they aren't held accountable, they won't stop using girls for sex, or at least have the sense to use birth control. They don't care here, because the justice system doesn't care about the children like it should. If no consequences for their actions, they won't think about them beforehand.

Exactly why there are so many fatherless children here. The court system doesn't make them accountable so they just go from one to another, making babies and not contributing. Generation after generation and you would think all the girls would understand. Some do, after their first child, and then look for farangs to maybe give them a more secure future. In America, if you don't pay for 18 years for the child you helped make, you go to jail, just like my ex girlfriend did. I had custody and she started missing payments. I didn't care, but in America, they have a child support division that goes after the ones that stop or refuse to pay. She got a month in jail, and never missed a payment again.

Sex in a relationship, where you treat the woman as a partner and not something that has to give you some, isn't a transaction. In a relationship, if you want it to last, both have to support the other. i didn't have that. Coming from a background of abuse and or neglect, they didn't know their role in a relationship, so only used or turned to silence or anger when conflict arose. I studied relationships, reading many books and articles for the last 30 years, to try and understand the other side. I became a better listener, father and husband, which helped a little, but when the other side reverts to the child in them when inevitable conflict arrives, you don't stand a chance at making things work. It always takes two. The second marriage didn't involve mutual children, but she was addicted to pain killers, and that messed with her mind, and our marriage. She died last year from a heart attack, obviously from the strain of many years on prescribed drugs. The first was a lunatic, and kidnapped my kids and took them to another state until I got them back and had them until they hit 19 and left the house. Her mom did this when she was a child also. I have a nice girlfriend now, who I help out When I need a little cash, she helps me. She cooks most of the time, great Thai, and she comes from a background of abuse and indifference. Husband didn't do anything much, including work, hit her, drank a lot, and didn't help out financially after she went back home with the kids. Then he passed away. She tells me everything, and trusts me because I've always treated her as number one. Arguments come, and I try to stifle them with a good ending. She never had this in her life, and it's alien to her, but she knows my intentions are good. When I move back home with my daughter, I would like her to come, but that's totally up to her. Thailand doesn't offer women over 40 much besides being used and taken for granted. She's younger than I am, but I'm in great shape besides my joints for my age, and no health problems. I understand my role here as a mate, and like everyone else, I'm okay with it.but she isn't near as greedy as others I've seen and heard about for may years before I came here. As far as God's thoughts, I'm always thinking you do what you think is right, hopefully being taught that by your parents, and try and learn as much as you can about things that are important to your life, and those that share your life.Briffaults Law is a theory, which sounds a little true, but in a mutual relationship, both make the decisions and are satisfied with the others desires. Both should get benefits from the relationship, if it's going to work. That doesn't mean money. If a woman is more interested in money, that's the one you stay away from. Leave her to the ones who want to buy her.