Orac

Just checked with the wife and she says this is the same document we got from the Amphur by the hospital though it didn't look the same to me!

My concern was more that what the OP was stating didn't make sense and appeared to have a sexual bias as he was adamant that it ONLY applied to hetrosexuals. By doing so it automatically made me question the accuracy of the information.

Though I am happily married and therefore have no need to get circumsized I would be interested to hear if it as simple a process for a middle aged man as it appears.

I am sure you will get better answers from others who understand more Thai than me but out daughter was born two weeks ago. We were given a certificate by the hospital which we then took to the local Amphur for the hospital where we also had to provide a copy of our marriage certificate and a translated and certified copy of my passport. We were then provided with another certificate (not sure which of these two would be classed as the birth certificate) which we had to take to my wifes local Amphur so that the baby could be added to the Blue housebook.

Our baby was added to housebook without anything other than hospital (Samitivej) supplied birth certificate,

Issued passport.

Travelled overseas.

We married 4 years later to get into Japan (as Japan does not recognize unmarried couples, especially if they are of different nationality).

One board member repeats daily that you are not baby's legal father unless you were married at the time of birth and you have to go to amphur in person.

Never done that and still have to see when and how it may bite my bum.

Not sure about having to be at the Amphur in person, I was because I was driving but didn't sign anything. My wife already had copies of my passport in case I was out of Thailand at the time our baby was registered.

Also I didn't understand the two certificates - the hospital one was on plain white paper but the one issued by the Amphur was a very light brown form that was printed on to and signed by my brother in law. It could be becuase the hospital our baby was born in came under a different Amphur to where we live.

I am sure someone with a bit more knowledge on this can enlighten us!

I suppose they are talking about the male-female vaginal intercourse scenario where the female is already infected and the male is not. During this 'normal' sex act the circumcised male is statistically less likely to become infected than the uncircumcised male. The anal canal evolved as a one-way-street and is not really designed for intercourse so I suppose there is more chance of damage being done to the colon walls exposing the male to blood from the infected female (or male). I don't know if there is any difference in HIV transfer ability of bodily fluids in the female vagina compared to blood but one would think that contact with blood would present the higher risk. As the Pope says, Abstinence is the safest form of sex. or

I still don't get it. I can accept there can be an arguement that virginal sex is 'less risky' than anal sex - I am sure someone has statistics to prove this one way or the other. What I don't understand is the arguement being made that being circumcised ONLY is of benefit in virginal sex - surely it would beneficial in all cases.

I am sure you will get better answers from others who understand more Thai than me but out daughter was born two weeks ago. We were given a certificate by the hospital which we then took to the local Amphur for the hospital where we also had to provide a copy of our marriage certificate and a translated and certified copy of my passport. We were then provided with another certificate (not sure which of these two would be classed as the birth certificate) which we had to take to my wifes local Amphur so that the baby could be added to the Blue housebook.

Though there appears to be an arguement here for male circumcision I cannot understand why the 'benefits' would only apply to male-female virginal intercourse. Surely if the HIV/AIDs receptors referred to are in the foreskin, by removing it there should be a reduction in cases all round be it virginal, anal or male-male - why does where it is stuck make a difference ?

Knocking someone out becuase they grabbed hold of you seems a bit over the top, I would hate to follow you down soi 7/8 as I would be tripping over all the unconcious bargirls, or is it just a race thing?

Why highlight the race issue? maybe that would be a gender issue, but then again that would spoil your abuse of the OP as a racist when the race is not the issue for the confrontation

Since the ethnic references have now been removed from the original post maybe my race question is now uncalled for however I still worry about those poor bargirls!

Knocking someone out becuase they grabbed hold of you seems a bit over the top, I would hate to follow you down soi 7/8 as I would be tripping over all the unconcious bargirls, or is it just a race thing?

Why see a lawyer when you have the chanote and it was passed at the land office?? Anybody can say this or that is his, let him prove it and go to a lawyer.

This is correct in my opinion. If the selling lady's name wasn't on the Chanote then the land office would never have transfered names. Save money, let the ex husband seek the lawyer. Sit back and wait until his next move. I doubt they'll be one.

Coventry,

You are right - he seems to have gone away now. My main worry was that my wife was getting quite stressed out by this and at the time was heavily pregnant so it was more the reassurance for her that I was looking for and also the principal that she shouldn't just go buying land without the proper advice if she wasn't totally sure what she was doing! When she has recovered from having the baby we will go check Mrs Pokapan out as I need to get wills sorted out now.

Cheers

Orac

Hi Ernest,

I fully understand your situation as I am going through something very similar myself, just a couple of weeks behind you. Since my wife came out of hospital just over a week ago with our baby daughter her sister has moved in to look after her and the baby and her mother to take care of 'rituals' - I hardly get a look in. My wife is now living and sleeping in the kitchen as her mother has her sleeping on a wooden bed with hot coals under it. Fortunately all the local villagers go straight into the kitchen so I at least am not being constantly bothered. It is certainly not what I expected and I thought I would get to play a bigger role however my wife keeps insisting it is only for a few days and this is the thai way.

The plus side here is that my sister in law is doing an excellent job of looking after our baby and helping my wife recover from a difficult birth. I keep myself sane by realising that everyone has the interests of our child at heart and her sister has brought up her own children very well so has far more experience than me. I did have to grit my teeth last night though when I went in the kitchen to find some old bloke chanting and spitting water over my wife and the baby with her mother sitting there smiling - I just left them to it on the basis that they have done this for many years without any suffering and strangely enough the baby wasn't crying.

I am sure that if this goes on for a few more weeks I will get more wound up but, as the baby is being well cared for without too much involvement from me, I can at least take a couple of days out to wind down if needs be.

I know from experience that all the little things gradually build up and get to you but I just keep reminding myself that I have a wonderful baby girl and all the current issues are temporary and not doing any real harm.

I hope you are able to solve/tolerate your problems there and it is important that you keep reminding yourself that everyone will go away eventually and you still will have a wonderful daughter - don't let the pressure force you to do something you will regret in the future.

All the best

Orac

Just had another big storm - knocked the power out for 2 hours.

I am 45b minutes up river from Nong Khai - last couple of days:

Monday - v hot in morning/afternoon. Evening had massive thunderstorm and torrential rain for 6/7 hours. cool over night

Tuesday -v hot and sunny through til about 4pm then heavy clouds and thunder for 2/3 hours with light rain. cool overnight

Today - cloudy. not so hot with no direct sun but very humid - looks like rain later maybe.

My wife had our baby a week ago and has been sleeping in the front room for the last five nights with her family support group (I am not to be trusted with the newborn yet!)

This morning I got up to find that they have moved her wooden 'bed'/rack into the kitchen and put a metal sheet under it covered with hot charcoal which they believe will make her produce more milk. I will try and take a picture later of this apparent torture but have been banned from the kitchen for 'insulting the family' by laughing at them.

If the decision is made I would get yourself somewhere else to stay before having it out with her - I doubt she will let this go easily without a fight/money. Though you may be able to just vainish if you don't sort this out now you may always be looking over your shoulder particularly since I assume from yr visa questions you are looking to stay in Thailand. Nobody knows what the future will bring and imagine in a few years time when circumstances have changed and you are settled down with a new lady and assets of some sort (house/condo etc) and your WIFE turns up looking for her cut then.

Used to use them very regularly and never a problem - still do for new places and peak periods - both as Precision Reservations previously and now Agoda. A few years back I booked a couple of weeks with them but changed my plans a week in. Planned on sorting out a refund when I got home but discovered that they had already done it. I have always found the details on their website more comprehensive than some of the others out there.

My wife had a baby girl last week at the local government hospital up here near Nong Khai and I have nothing but praise for the service/level of care. It was not an issue of money as I am quite able to pay for the best of private care available however my wife chose the local hospital as she wanted to be near her family. If you are looking for a more private affair without family and friends I would suggest you put some distance between yourself and yr wifes family - I counted 22 family and friends there for the birth and for the three days in hospital afterwards it was a constant stream.

Costs were Bt.3010.00 medical costs and Bt.1300 per night for a private suite - I must say the public wards were terrible with beds crammed together and beds also in all the corridors and open areas.

This is obviously a terrible situation with two people suffering a great deal.

The inital story in the Nation does have incorrect information in it as it seriously understates the injuries to the woman involved - my initial thoughts were sceptical as it seemed a very one sided report particularly since she received only burns to her arms after having petrol poured on her and on the floor. The clarification above from SBK makes the police conclusions far more reasonable considering they would not have been able to question the frenchman concerned.

Going back to the BBC report, it seems to suggest that he was visiting thailand for 2-3 months to recover from mental and drug problems which was a genuine claim - it was only because he didn't return that it became fraud.

IF the local authority had been aware of this recovery plan I would question why they gave him the money in the first place. Though we shouldn't condone this sort of fraud I am far more concerned about the system that allows this to happen - so much money is now taken in taxes but there is so little control over what is done with it. There was clearly no personal contact with the claimant after the benefits were awarded or requirement for doctors reports (he was claiming severe disability allowances for what should have been a short term problem remember).

Hi Fremmel,

Thanks for the details - exactly what I was looking for.

Cheers

Orac

Thanks Mac,

I will wait and see if I can get a personal recomendation off anyone - if not he looks like my man!

Cheers

Orac

By all means use a lawyer if you want, but first have a look at the back of the chanote, and see whose name the land was in before your wife bought it. (Your wife or someone who can read Thai can easily do this for you) If the chanote had only the name of the lady from whom you bought then likely no problem. If husbands name also on the chanote, then he would have needed to sign the sale contract and then you do need a lawyer. But then you can blame the land office for not doing their job properly!

Thanks Nick,

I will check again with my wife when she is back later but she did tell me last night that only the lady was shown.

Ballbreaker,

Thanks for the link.

I did check out Isaan Lawyers website but they are in Korat which is a fair way from here. Ideally I was after someone local as I have several other things I need to sort out that are not so urgent and will be living up here for a while.

Cheers

Orac

Hi All,

My wife bought some land a few months ago under chanote from a lady in her village.

She has had a couple of agressive phone calls from the ladies ex-husband over the last three days claiming the land is his even though my wife now has a chanote in her name.

Can anyone recommend a good english speaking lawyer in Nong Khai province who would be able to help us - I have done a search on this and there are references to a good thai female lawyer but no contact details.

Unfortunately my thai is very limited so I am struggling to get involved (must try harder!).

Please PM me with any details.

Many Thanks

Orac

My wife rarely gives me information when I need it - yesterday I had an hours notice that we were going to a local concert though she was adamant she had already told me about it but couldn't remember when. A couple of minutes later she told me we had a new house party to go to in May in Pattaya (10 hour drive away) - no doubt the next I will hear of it will be an hour before we are due to leave (or half the family will turn up with bags packed) and it will be my fault that I forgot about it.

I took my wife to Switzerland to visit friends a couple of years ago and she was able to enter on her UK Spouses visa - we had to fly there directly from UK as we couldn't transit other countries. I just checked the Swiss Embassy website but cannot find the examples page of visas they accept so not sure if this has changed now.

I went through this a couple of years ago but registered the marriage legally a couple of months before having the traditional ceremony in Thailand. This gave me plenty of time to sort out a spouses visa for my wife (enabling her to work in UK) who returned to the UK wiith me a couple of weeks after the village wedding. Technically it would have been possible to do everything (legal, traditional and visa) in three weeks but would have meant a lot of messing about whilst I had family over from the UK. I did use a UK OISC registered agency (google Orchid of Siam) who were extremely helpful and had offices in the UK and BKK however, in hindsight, I could probably have done it all myself without any help though the peace of mind I got from using them was worth the money.