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Posts posted by fangless
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PayPal has many functions that TransferWise does not cover. I use both for totally different functions and am happy with both. In fact I need PayPal more than I need TransferWise. Hence my dislike of the OP Heading!
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Sam didn’t get the astronomy scholarship he hoped for.
But the school did name a cluster of stars after him.
It was a constellation prize.
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I don't like people who take drugs...
For example: airport security, police etc
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13 minutes ago, jvs said:Don't want to get zapped by a mod
In this "Jokes" Forum we tend to enjoy ourselves and get zapped by the other member with just a little nudge now and then from "Crossy".
Long may it continue that way. Now back to business:
A pun walks in to a conversation and kills 10 people...
Pun in, ten dead.
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I think your heading is very misleading/scaremongering and should be changed to "No more PayPal registrations in Thailand"
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3 minutes ago, jvs said:
Who can trump that!
Being British we don't. We just either cap it or crown it!
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1 minute ago, faraday said:
It's getting worse by degrees.
I must point out that we have been round all these points in the last minutes.
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16 minutes ago, jvs said:
You mean come full circle?
What; Before or after the circumcision?
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2 minutes ago, bluesofa said:
That's more of a wrecked angle.
I see we are all off on another tangent again!
PS; Sorry Crossy but it's raining again!
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Two Mexicans got lost in the desert.
Juan says to Miguel.
'look, Miguel, it is a bacon tree!'
'Don't be silly Juan it is a mirage, do not waste your energy!'
'miguel, I am so thirsty and hungry I must go and investigate,'
As Juan approaches two men jump out and shoot him to death.
'miguel, it is not a bacon tree... It is a ham-bush.'- 1
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3 minutes ago, Crossy said:
Can I change my encompass to a circumscription?
That would be an unkind cut to our coversation.
PS; I promise to stop for now. (the rain has stopped so I can go out now)
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1 minute ago, Crossy said:
We just want to ensure you measure up.
I thought moderators were meant to keep the subject clean and not discuss male private parts!!????
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Just now, Crossy said:
We just want to ensure you measure up.
Who will be first to the tape?
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1 minute ago, Crossy said:
It depends upon what your disussion encompasses.
See post 8463. You loose points as I have already encompassed that input there!
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1 minute ago, bluesofa said:
I think it calls for a 180 degree U-turn and then we can draw a straight line underneath all of this.
There is always someone who want to rule us!
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2 minutes ago, Crossy said:
It's certainly turning into a protracted discussion.
How many points do we get? And do we earn a degree if we get enough?
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11 minutes ago, faraday said:
You're being obtuse.
I should point out that you also appear to have an acute sense of humour if I am not mistaken!
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A husband and wife visit a marriage counsellor. First, the wife speaks to the counsellor alone.
The counsellor asks her, “You say you’ve been married 20 years. So what seems to be the problem?”
“The wife replies, “It’s my husband. He’s driving me crazy! I’m going to leave him if he continues!”
“How does he drive you crazy?”
“For 20 years,” she says, “he’s been doing these stupid things.
First, whenever we go out, he’s always looking at the floor and refuses to go near anyone. It’s very embarrassing.”
The marriage counsellor is amused, “Anything else?”
“He keeps picking his nose all the time! Even in public!”
“Hmm, anything else?”
The wife hesitates, “Whenever we’re making love, he NEVER lets me be on top! Once in a while, I’d like to be in control!”
“Ah,” says the counsellor, “I think I’ll talk to your husband now.”
So the wife goes out of the room and the husband says to the counsellor, “For years I’ve been loving and considerate and I’ve always given her what she wants! What could be the problem?”
The counselor explains, “She says you’ve got these habits that are driving her crazy. First, you’re always acting strange in public—looking at the floor and never going near anyone else.”
The husband looks concerned, “Oh, you don’t understand! It’s one of the few things my father told me to do on his deathbed and I swore I’d obey everything he said.”
“What did he say?”
“He said that I should never step on anyone’s toes!”
The counsellor looks amused, “Actually, that means that you should not do anything that would cause anyone else to get angry.”
The husband looks sheepish, “Oh. Okay.”
The counsellor continues, “And you keep picking your nose in public.”
“Well, it’s another thing my father specifically commanded me to do! He told me to always keep my nose clean.”
The counsellor smiles. “That just means you should stay out of trouble.
And,” he continued, “finally, she says that you never allow her to be on top during your lovemaking.”
“This,” says the husband, “is the last thing my father commanded me to do on his deathbed, and it’s the most important thing.”
“What did he say?”
The husband replies, “With his dying breath, he said,‘Don’t screw up.’”
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15 minutes ago, jvs said:
You see,it all averages out.
Have a nice day,i have more unimportant things to do.
I took math for many years,i liked the teacher but she was always two points ahead of me.
Your comments encompass mine exactly. We extracted our "pun of flesh" as the Scottish playwrite MacSheakspear said
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4 minutes ago, jvs said:
Ok,fine you win!!!I do not drink alcohol,only 0% beer for me.
Thanks. I was just trying to be a kindred spirit (non alcoholic)
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Just now, jvs said:
Ok i will stop now,starting to see things double!
I'll drink to that!
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Just now, jvs said:
I agree,let's not turn this into a numbers game!
I knew I could count on you to get my point!
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2 minutes ago, jvs said:
I was calculating this kind of response,just being average i can not understand this quotation.
To sum up I think the rest of the Joke forum will think we have used up our quota of puns for the day!
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The quarantine has ruined many marriages but mine is still going strong.
Just the other day I woke up to my beautiful and loving wife holding a pillow tightly over my face to protect me from the coronavirus.
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This place is becoming like a ghost town
in Chiang Mai
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I hadn't realized it was a selfie by CC! Looks younger than I imagined!