DaiHard

Only one sentence, right? Even a very compound, complex sentence?

No as many sentences as you want but you can only use a word once. Once its used then you can't use it again. BTW one student did use all 50 words but only by concatenating to and day together; which I thought was cheating

Here is an exercise that I give my students:

This is a list of the most popular words in spoken English (in the UK)

I, up, look, we, like, and, on, at, for, he, is, said, go, you, are, this, going, they, away, play, a, am, cat, to, come, day, the, dog, big, my, mum, no, dad, all, get, in, went, was, of, me, she, see, it, yes, can, about, after, again, an, another

The task is to create sentences, using as many words as possible but using each word only once. You can't change the tense nor add or subtract letters (so it can't become it's or its for example) nor can you add any extra words.

The best I've seen is using 48 words out of the 50.

Can you do better?

Compared with what the morons in the UK government are doing the Thai system is an object lesson in crystal clarity. The new UK system announced at the end of 2007 goes something like this:

In order to be able to teach you must have QTS (Qualified Teacher Status) from the beginning of this month and in order to get that you need to have a degree in your specialist subject plus a minimum of PGCE. Ok so far so good, been there, done that. However I have always taught post 16 (adults) so I can't get QTS status however I could get QTLS status (LS stands for learning and skills) which I would HAVE to have if I wanted to work in a tertiary college. Fine, says I, how do I get that considering its mandatory from the 1st of February 2008. Dunno says they the specifications haven't been released yet but you should join the afs (which turned out to be a private company that gets loadsa cash from the government for getting teachers to join it and.....?).

So I joined. Result...I was told that I would need to create academic papers 4 times a year (<deleted>?) and go on loads of continuing professional development courses on diversity and health and safety and then possibly, maybe I could be qualified enough to apply for a training course after which I might be considered for AQTLS status (associate QTLS) which means I can't actually teach on my own in the classroom even though I've being teaching at University and Tertiary level for umpteen years. Then sometime down the road some jobsworth with a clipboard might consider me good enough to upgrade me to QTLS status (if they ever get round to releasing the details as to how its done). Btw to make an already murky system even denser teachers with QTS can't teach year 12 students without QTLS and, of course, you can't have both QTS and QTLS. With me so far?

The idea, so we were told, is to upgrade the quality of teachers in the UK. Which I have no problem with. What I do have a BIG problem with is that it applies to people teaching practical skills like plumbing or carpentry who wouldn't know how to start writing an academic paper and will just quit (enough quit after Clark brought in those TDLB awards a few years ago, which were, of course, to raise the quality of teachers yada yada). The other problem is that the average teacher lasts less than a year in the profession in the UK after qualifying (If you think little Somchai is a problem try Feral Phil and his gang of knife wielding thugs) so the UK education system will lose even more teachers and there is already a chronic shortage. The interesting thing is that the rules DON'T apply to foreign teachers working there because that would be racist!

And once you've done all this you are now qualified to earn the princely sum of £18,000 a year which may, if you are lucky, be enough to get you a seedy bedsit in a rough part of London.

The problem as I see it is that all government types (and this applies everywhere) haven't really got a clue about the realities at the chalkface. The kingdom always look at peace with itself from the ivory tower.

I'd love to see more qualified (and quality) teachers - my (University) students come to me with almost no English skills and that's after umpteen years of EP or International school English teaching - but I recognise there is, and always will be, a shortage. Personally I think the solution is for more English language TRAINERS, people with little or no academic skills (and with only a Police check by way of paperwork) but who could just talk to the kids in English but not teach them - the qualified teachers do that. Its conversations in English that these kids are lacking not teachers with a plethora of paperwork.

They ought to do what they did in Spain. They brought in a ban on smoking in all bars which was totally ignored so they modified it so that bars had to put a sign on their door to say whether they allow smoking or not. Result - total compliance.

I always start a new (to me) group of students off with pronunciation based on the phonetic chart so I can wean them off the bad habits they learned with their Thai English teachers (like fooad instead of food) and then get them to translate their names into their corresponding phonetic symbols so I don't sound like an idiot every time I do the register and as an added bonus they always enjoy doing it.

And you can make it last for 6 hours

I've just had this surreal conversation with the HR department at the University where I work:

HR: You need Criminal record to work here

ME: Well I don't have one

HR: You have to get one

ME: I have a letter from the Police in the UK (Subject Access Request)

It is scrutinised then...

HR: It doesn't say anything, it is blank

ME: That's because I don't have a criminal record

HR: You need a criminal record to work here.....

Has it not occurred to the Police in the UK that instead of filling a page with gobbledegook about Data Protection followed by a blank page that it might, just might, be a tad confusing to a non english speaker. It is supposed to say what criminal convictions or entries on the Sex Offenders Register etc. (if any) the person named in the letter has and if they haven't got any then say so: The person named in this letter has no convictions what exactly is so difficult about that?

It is never too late. Make sure that you are recruited from abroad. That way, you get free airfare, a settlement allowance, and some form of housing.

Thank you for all your kind advise. Just one thing - how do you get recruited from abroad? All the jobs seem to require that you are in country when you apply.

Hi

I was wondering if someone could offer some advise to a complete novice in the LOS teaching profession. I am coming over at the end of october hoping to get a teaching job is this too late to start looking? If not who would be offering jobs at that time?

I have a BA, PGCE and TEFL and 10 years classroom experience plus international business experience. I also have a (University educated) Thai wife and a daughter (I had a company office in Bangkok once upon a time).

Many thanks for your help.

Education Certificate is the Post Graduate Certificate of Education (PGCE) its what teachers in the UK need in order to teach in schools - as it says its a 1 year post grad course . You can take the course if you haven't got a degree in which case it is called a Certificate of Education (Cert Ed)

I'm confused - the requirement before appeared to be a BA plus TEFL now its a Cert ED (which is obviously a lot quicker to obtain AND there is government help and a 'golden hello' of £2,500 for english teachers Click here for details  as it is trying to train more teachers and as the Dept for Ed says "Please note that a degree is not required to begin undergraduate teacher training,") there is no mention of a BA (or TEFL) now for Thai Visas.

Have the rules been changed again?

In 1996 the UK government came up with a scheme to allow people who had unrelated courses under their belt to use them to qualify for a degree or other form of higher education diploma (HND whatever). The system was called accredited prior learning and the idea was that each of your courses (and/or experience ) to be assigned a number of credits which would all count towards a degree (or GNVQ level 4 in eduspeak). The number of credits required for a degree was 360 (I think its now 300).

All it needed was someone with a TDLB D36 to 'award' the credits and then they could be used to knock time off the time it took to get a degree.

I have used the scheme as I got one of those early D36 awards (they are now called an A1 Assessor Award) which meant that I could say grant 120 credits for a year's successful classroom teaching (the guidelines specifically say "learning resulting from, for example, formal teaching" ) plus another 30 credits for TEFL - so that's half the degree course done. Then all you needed to do was to take these credits to a uk university (preferably one that produces modular degrees) and get them placed on your transcript. Hence with a couple of years of part time study (maybe less) you could graduate with a kosher degree that is acceptable anywhere.

You can read more about the accredited prior learning system here

Thanks for the input guys. Looks like I'll be saving me pennies.

Which bringsa me to another question. I'm enrolling or trying to, at Rhamkampeang Uni. seems the do a B.Ed degree in English. So, does anyone know if you can get student grants from back home to help cover costs? In my case this would be Dreary old Blighty.

Cheers.

Haven't you heard not only are there no grants for students in the UK any more but instead they have to pay about £3,000 p.a for tuition. You should qualify for a student loan though which, as its not repayable before you earn over £25K a year (I think that's the figure), you wil never have to pay back with the sort of money you get paid as an ESL teacher in LOS. 

Why not do an OU degree, its cheaper and you can do it anywhere - I read on here somewhere that you can't do it if you are in Thailand, because of exams I believe, but OU themselves said the exams could be sat at the british council. You can read about the Open University here

Thanks for your answer. I am still trying to get the application form to fill in, the link in the original post was very helpful and they replied to me within 12 hours. They told me to contact the local HQ in the area I last lived, this I did, but I have had no reply from them at all as of yet. My mother is going into her local police office for me tomorrow to see what they have to say, and to pick up a form if she can, but with 3 postal periods plus the time it takes for them to process everything it is looking grim on the time scale I have been given. I did start this process one week before the school received official notice that this would be required but as the police are ignoring my mails....?

Can this be done through the Embassy or can the Embassy supply me with something that will suffice. I am being told they can but only by Thai people so far. Is there a link to somewhere I can download the form from at all?

Any info on the Embassy being able to supply me with a clearance check would be greatly appreciated.

Thanks.

Your mother can pick the form up at the local police station then get it faxed to you at the post office. You need to sign it and post it back then she hands it in at the Police station with your birth certificate (or you send a photocopy of your passport) and £10. That's the quickest way - you can't get a form from the embassy because each police force has a different method of dealing with it.

Silly system  but that's new labour for you.

Daihard, you know and I know that the return of the cane won't happen as the country is run by a bunch of politically correct do-gooders. Just hope they don't come to Thailand.

I agree that political correctness is the problem. I had a class once that I was teaching business studies and IT to so I came up with the idea of doing a student magazine (it was a tertiary college attached to a university), they had to run it properly with a management board and editor , commission articles, get paid adverts to pay the printing costs etc. It was a huge success and very popular; the problem was it had articles about drugs (how to deal with overdoses etc - all based on government leaflets and nothing glorifying them; the opposite in fact), sex (preventing STDs and putting the message across that no means NO) and music (reviews of rock concerts). All normal stuff for 18+ year old students.

The problem was the college management panicked after a female member of staff complained it apparently showed students the ‘negative aspects’ of college life instead of warm, fluffy stuff like inclusiveness and gender awareness. The upshot was they tried to recall the magazine and I was told I could no longer do ‘real business’ work with the students but instead I had to rely on ‘simulations’ in future that were not allowed out of the classroom. And I was made to serve on the College’s equal opportunities committee as the token male

The government carried out a 'consultation' exercise this week where a 1,000 (hand

picked, labour supporting) parents were asked to comment on the government's plans

to reduce violence in schools and instill respect. The idea, of course, was for them

to say that the government's ideas such as task forces, super asbos, citizenship

lessons and teaching kids english (!) were the way forward and jolly good ideas.

The problem was the parents overwhelmingly called for a return of the cane!

Just to remind you why you left the UK. A 17 year old youth 'having a laugh'  - full story here

A recent survey (1) by the Teacher Support Network has found that 49% of teachers have been physically assaulted and over 90% have been verbally assaulted by students. The weapons used ranged from furniture (26%) through to guns (1%) and knives (2%). A poll conducted by Sec Ed (a teachers magazine) found that three-in-five secondary teachers say they know of students who have brought weapons into their school. You know it was a teacher’s mag because only teachers (or devoted trekkies) would say three-in-five. They said: “Knives are the most common, but teachers have also seen guns, batons and, in one incident, a meat cleaver in the classroom.”

Delegates at the recent NASUWT teachers' conference, in Llandudno, spoke of violent children using knives, iron bars and guns in schools. A member of the union's executive, Brian Garvey, recalled how one of its members was shot in the back in a school corridor.

The head teacher responded sternly by excluding the boy from school for three days. Absolutely! Any more could have disrupted the child’s education and, after all, he was only having a laugh. That’s the problem with teachers - no sense of humour. The Union wanted charges to be brought but the department for Education thought that would have been a disproportionate response.

Some head teachers too prefer a softer line; take Terry Creissen, Headteacher of Colne Community School in Colchester, Essex, who said that heads need to strike a balance between punishing students who carry weapons and accepting that young people can make mistakes.

The solution proposed in the USA (2), where classroom violence is also a problem, is, according to Republian congressman Frank Lasee, that teachers should be allowed to carry concealed weapons. "To make our schools safe for our students to learn, all options should be on the table," he said. "Israel and Thailand have well-trained teachers carrying weapons and keeping their children safe from harm. It can work in Wisconsin."

Has he noted the secret to success in EFL teaching in Thailand; “Give me an example of a split infinitive Nok or you'll grow a third eye”?

In the UK we are made of gentler stuff and what our esteemed educational leaders are proposing is that teachers be allowed to frisk students for concealed weapons. Teachers are being sent on courses to learn how to search students without actually touching them (3). Although how they are supposed to comply with the guideline that says: “The pupil can be required to remove outer clothing. If this is refused, a searcher can use reasonable force to remove it” is unclear. In addition teachers are being issued with portable metal detectors and x-ray systems are being installed at school entrances. The problem, as I see it, is how you are supposed to get a belligerent 15 year old armed with an Uzi to hand it over and would he, under human rights laws (right to personal property), be entitled to get it back after class?

According to the ineffable Department for (against!) Education the children are not bringing the weapons in to specifically attack teachers but instead to attack other kids. Phew! that’s ok then, I thought we had a problem there for a second. As a result a lot of kids are investing in body armour (4), which can be bought in adolescent sizes on ebay for reasonable sums.

Of course violence is not the only issue in UK classrooms the SecEd poll also found that that one-in-five teachers (20 per cent for those not into eduspeak) have been falsely accused of assault or inappropriate conduct by a student, more than half of all teachers knew of a teacher in their school who has been attacked, one-in-20 said they had been physically attacked by a parent and nearly 40% had their cars or personal possessions trashed or stolen.

As a result up to 37% of all teachers are, or have been, off work with stress related illnesses and (according to research undertaken by Teacher’s TV ) half of all teachers are considering quitting the profession, due to intolerable stress, (5) or coming to Thailand to teach English in Worldsassholeburi (Ok I made that bit up).

Further Reading

(1) Half of all teachers have been attacked by students click here

(2) Teachers with guns click here

(3) Teachers searching kids click here

(4) Body Armour and gun crime click click here

(5) Half of all teachers leaving because of stress click here

Personally I'd have thought that it was almost impossible to create oven ready lesson plans - each class is different, they start from a different place, they each have different group and interpersonal dynamics, all groups have different abilities and they each have different strengths and weaknesses all of which mean that a proper lesson plan is tailoured to the group on a class by class basis; because they might shoot through a whole set of learning objectives yet it'll take a number of classes to hit another objective. And of course it all depends on the syllabus and the level. And don't forget that the lesson plan is really based on what your capabilities are as a teacher; in other words they are personal (and dynamic) if they're going to be effective.

Lesson planning is one of the first things they teach you in teacher training and IMHO it one of the keys to being a good teacher. But then I've heard that in some ESL schools they stick to a set plan, almost timed to the minute, and you just trot it out . I don't know how true that is but it isn't teaching.

I'm not sure that helped much.

From where have you got the impression or information that a B Ed is a necessity in Thailand?

It was on Ajarn as it happens, am I wrong?

I've been looking at the various threads on qualifications and I am under the impression that what the authorities are looking for are people with a B Ed and I'm not sure why.

I did the 'traditional' degree + PGCE route (I'm UK based at present) and at one point I ended up teaching on a B Ed course (the UK government decided all teachers needed to learn Windows - I'd have preferred they all learned Linux personally  but I digress) and I found that they were good teachers but their subject knowledge was not as good as the BA/PGCE teachers (and they finished in 3 years rather than 4) but as most of them were destined (so I was told) to teach in primary schools subject knowledge wasn't important. So why the insistence on the B Ed in Thailand?

Is it on the basis of a good teacher can teach anything and as long as they are 2 pages ahead of their students in the book it is ok?

And on the subject of qualifications why can't a group of people get together and form a teacher training college in LOS? I know my Alma Mater (A major UK University - NOT an ex poly) would be happy to franchise the course (which would be 2 years in service, i.e part time and at weekends whilst still working) and the participant would end up with an internationally recognised qualification (PGCE or Cert Ed for those without a degree) that they could use anywhere. The Cert Ed can be used without a degree in UK schools so it *should* be acceptable in Thailand. What do you think?

How long does your police check stay valid for?

I can only assume that if you go back home,you have to obtain a new one before you re-enter Thailand?

I was on the phone to the Police today and they said they are valid for 90 days and they come in the form of a certificate on tamper proof paper (whatever that is). This is all you can get as an individual, the crb checks are for institutions only, they list all convictions including cautions, reprimands etc oddly enough they were't issued for visa purposes but for individuals to check that the data held on them on the Police National Computer is correct under the freedom of information act. Before that you weren't entitled to know what was writen on the database about you. Bloke at the Home Office I contacted said they are acceptable by Thai Authorities.

Glad the Thais are taking this seriously.

For all UK teachers or wannabe teachers you can find out the details of how to get the required police checks by going here